


Good Things Come to Those Who Wait

by glowparrilla



Category: Morrilla - Fandom, Once Upon a Time RPF
Genre: Don't take it seriously, F/F, Fluff and Angst, For the fans only, Friends to Lovers, Imagination, Jennifer Morrison - Freeform, Lana Parrilla - Freeform, Morrilla, Not Real at all, Shameless Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-16
Updated: 2018-11-22
Packaged: 2019-06-11 11:54:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 92,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15314952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glowparrilla/pseuds/glowparrilla
Summary: *MORRILLA FANFICTION*SwanQueen is finally declared canon! This story is based on a theory about how things would work with Lana Parrilla and Jennifer Morrison after the news of having to be a couple on the show Once Upon A Time. It's basically how Lana and Jennifer would manage to play the newest couple of Storybrooke and deal with their upcoming forbidden romance in real life.





	1. New Reality

**Author's Note:**

> *WARNING*
> 
> Even though the actresses exist in real life, this is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are a product of my imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to locales, events, business establishments, or actual persons, - living or dead - is entirely coincidental.
> 
> This is for the fans who ship Jennifer Morrison and Lana Parrilla in real life. It doesn't mean that they are together or any of the sorts. It's pure imagination.
> 
> DO NOT SHOW THIS STORY TO THE ACTRESSES. The story is ONLY for FANS.
> 
> Thank you.

**CHAPTER ONE**

**New Reality**

**_Lana’s Point of View_ **

“Hey Lana, good morning!” Ginny said happily to the other woman.

"Good morning, Ginny! Um… Have you seen Jen?"

Ginny raised her eyebrows and looked at Lana. "Yes, she just arrived. I think she's in her trailer. Why?" The short-haired woman seemed curious.

"Adam asked me to call her. He wants to talk to both of us."

"Hm, interesting. The last time he talked to you two together, Hook and Robin appeared on the show."

"Right," Lana took a deep breath. "I hope this time is something better. I still have my hopes up!" Lana raised her hands in the air as if talking to God.

"I hope it too!" Ginny replied with a chuckle. "Now go find Jen and then tell me everything!" Lana nodded and left.

* * *

&

Lana was in front of Jennifer Morrison’s trailer knocking on the door. When it opened, she saw the blonde fully dressed in Emma Swan’s clothes.

"Oh, hi Lana! What's up?"

“Hi, uh, Adam and Eddy want to talk to us. They sent me here."

“Oh, weird… They don't talk to us together since-”

“Yes, I don't know what it is this time. But I'm extremely curious though."

Jen nodded and they started walking towards A&E office, talking and trying to guess what this conversation was about. Lana had some thoughts in her mind, but she wouldn't say it to Jen until she knew exactly what it was.

"So, are you ready?" Lana asked Jen before opening the office's door and saw the blonde nodding with a small smile on her face.

"Hello, good morning, ladies. How are you doing today?” Adam spoke first.

"Fine."

“Good," they answered in unison.

"Great, then. So… Eddy and I have something to tell you,” they nodded, paying close attention. "I don't know if you observed but, Emma and Regina had a different relationship since the beginning. The fights, the lingering looks… _Everything,_ ” Lana nodded with a small smile. "Everything we did so far was on purpose for Emma and Regina."

"I don't understand," Lana started. "How can everything be on purpose if nothing happened?"

"What you're talking about?" Jen asked, a little confused.

"We couldn't let it happen that time. And we also didn't know how the public would react to it, but now that we've seen how the fans love and stand for Emma and Regina together, we're ready to make it happen."

"Yes! I knew it!" Lana cheered, causing Adam, Eddy, and Jen look at her. "What? I've been waiting for SwanQueen for a long time, okay?" she smiled happily while clapping her hand excitedly.

She received a big smile from Adam and Eddy and looked at Jen, who had a thoughtful expression on her face.

"Are you okay, Jen?" Eddy asked, causing the blonde to shake her head as if coming out of a trance. She nodded and flashed him a weak smile. "Do you have any questions?"

The blonde seemed to think carefully again, her hand resting on her chin. "Uh, yes. What about Emma’s and Hook's story? What will happen to them? I mean… with Hook,” Lana involuntarily sighed.

"Let me explain since the beginning to you both,” Adam started with a careful tone. “We created the show with the goal of showing the public what we think about fairytales, and how it would be if it existed in our world. In the meantime, we happened to create characters of amazing, strong women that matched so much together, even as friends. With that thought in mind, we realized that we couldn't waste their potential. And we also wanted to make a difference with the show,” Adam looked at Eddy silently asking him to finish his speech.

“So why not create a show that could change people's lives? That's what we thought back then, so ever since, we increased the potential of Emma’s and Regina’s relationship even more, making it look unintentional, but with future plans. What's best than the LGBTQ community to try to change how the people think?" he rhetorically asked, a satisfied smile on his face.

Lana was definitely shocked. She never imagined the real _reason_ the writers of Once Upon A Time didn't make SwanQueen canon, or why they decided to do it just now. She looked at Jen and saw that the blonde was also very shocked herself. Who wouldn't be, anyway?

In spite of their silence, Adam continued, “But in that time, as I said, things were still complicated for us to reveal such strong news. So we decided to wait and create a _lot_ of different plots. But still, we’ve managed to create a deep and strong connection between Emma and Regina behind the curtains of what they could become in the future. Together they truly are the power of true love that everyone needs to see and learn that we decided to write about."

"Wow," Lana blurted out after a few seconds of silence. "I wasn't expecting for this explanation,” she chuckled humourlessly. "But why did you wait this long? This could have happened like two years ago."

"Right," Adam agreed. "But then another idea came to our minds: why don't we make a heterosexual story and let the fans find love in these women by themselves? Sadly, the SwanQueen fans didn't it like that way. Actually, they discovered way too soon, since the first season. We still had to go on with the plan, so we kept doing it the way we thought it was good enough. But then, the SwanQueen fans started to hate us, spreading out that we were wasting a great story,” he looked down, his face showing sadness.

"So now we finally decided to make things right, to show the story we’ve always wanted to. We are not _homophobic_ , quite the contrary actually,” Eddy said. "Regina and Robin, Emma and Hook were just a distraction… Even though they were dating men, they would still prefer each other, save each other, demonstrate their love in the ways they could for each other… And that would create a bigger love, true love ready to beat and fight everything they would come to face it. Just like Snow and Charming did once."

"That's a great parallel,” Jen finally spoke in a quiet voice; her eyes a little bit dazed from this intense conversation.

"Just like Aladdin and Jasmine now, right?" Lana asked with a sparkle in her eyes. She was definitely loving this new arrangement in the show.

“Exactly," Adam smiled at her. "You're both okay with Emma and Regina being together?"

“Absolutely,” Lana replied without hesitation.

“Uh, sure. It’s not a problem to me,” Jen added quietly. She had always been very reserved, Lana noted.

"You'll have the scripts by tomorrow morning with the new scenes. _Great_ new scenes," Adam and Eddy smiled at each other, seeming _very_ excited. "You can start rehearsing already, if you want, just to get comfortable. Everything will be very _perfect_ and _right_ soon."

* * *

&

"Jen, are you okay?" Lana asked when they left the office.

"Yes, I'm just… a bit surprised."

"You clearly weren't expecting for that, huh?" Lana asked with a dry chuckle.

“No," Jennifer cleared her throat as she fidgeted slightly, seeming a bit uncomfortable.

“Well, me neither. I thought it was never going to happen,” she added, watching as Jennifer just nodded in response. Ignoring her co-star’s uncomfortableness, Lana continued, “Are you happy with their decision?" she reached forward and touched the blonde's arm gently, in some way trying to make her _less_ uncomfortable.

"Yeah, um… I-I think that's the right thing to do.”

"Yes, I think so too," Lana pulled Jen to herself and hugged her tight, holding the tears that wanted to fall on the curve of the blonde's neck. "I'm so happy,” she murmured low, listening to the relieved exhale Jen let out.

"Me too, Lana. Me too,” Jen hugged her back, pressing Lana tightly against her body shape. "So… what are gonna do now?"

Lana pulled a few inches apart from the blonde to look with uncertainty at her. “You mean… Emma and Regina or Jen and Lana?” Jen flashed her an amused smile that made her smile back immediately. "We're in costume now so I'm a little confused."

"I mean us. Jen and Lana,” the blonde explained.

"We can rehearse privately before starting to film the scenes like they said. I think it would do some good to us.”

“Yeah, I… I think it would help on the scenes we are going to film soon,” Lana examined the blonde carefully as she said that. She seemed worried.

“Are you okay? You look worried.”

“No, I-I’m not worried at all. This is a good thing. Us. As a couple. I mean, uh, on TV,” Lana smiled amusedly at her co-star.

“Yes, it’s a good thing indeed. And we’re friends, which makes everything easier,” she grasped Jen's hand and squeezed it gently. "I’m sure we'll make a great couple!”

* * *

&

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

Jennifer imagined her life before and after this day. Before, she would probably be running over lines inside her trailer, playing with Ava or reading a book somewhere at the set. _Or_ she would have been having small talk with Colin, Ginny or Josh.

After this day, she was in a trailer, yes. But not in her _own_. She was in Lana's trailer, sitting on the comfortable leather couch while she watched Lana and Ginny talking — _screaming_ , actually — about the _good news_.

Right. SwanQueen becoming canon was a very good thing, but Jen couldn't stop thinking about all the things she would have to do with her _co-star/crush_ , Lana Parrilla.

It had been hard for Jen at first when she discovered her desire for this intriguing woman. Back then, when the show had aired and the two of them met, it was easy and _also_ hard because the feeling of desiring a woman was kind of new to her. And also, Jen was dating, so it wasn't right to want to be with someone else.

Years passed and the attraction she thought would go away just became worse and hard to avoid each passing day. Emma’s and Regina’s scenes didn't help a bit. The hate and fire she had to display on the scenes with Lana could be easily described as sexual tension. As they filmed together and got into each other’s personal space frequently, all of it started becoming extremely hard to hide. Jennifer smiled at the brunette more than she should; invited her to take selfies at the show’s parties; initiated small talks… She just couldn't help herself and always stayed close to that stunning woman. They were close friends, yes. Just friends, though.

Lana was so charismatic and made her laugh all the time. They used to take a lot of pictures together and post on social media too. They even spoke about each other or _with_ each other on Twitter, which Jen had realized it made the fans go wild. That time, things seemed to be easier for them. But then, Adam and Eddy said that they couldn't be seen together anymore since the hate had started.

Jen had said: _What the fuck? What did we do wrong? We're friends and now we can't be seen together? What's wrong with you people?_

Unfortunately, they had to comply with their bosses’ command. But their friendship, even though it wasn't for that long, didn't have to end that way. Jen noticed that Lana had been very sad with Adam and Eddy about their decision. _That was ridiculous,_ Lana had said. _Totally unacceptable,_ her own words.

_"Jen, we won't let them do this to us just because the fans want Emma and Regina together. We're friends! They can't do that!"_

_"I know. Don't worry, everything will be fine. I think they're just scared of what the ABC can do with the show. Maybe a gay couple now is not what the studio wants; there’s also the possibility that the show might get cancelled.”_

When they went to conventions, minutes before the start, Adam and Eddy would always advise them that they couldn't talk about SwanQueen, and had to be very careful when answering the tricky questions from the _SQFans_. It wasn't like the beginning anymore. And it would never be again.

However — speaking of her unstoppable attraction for her co-star again — pretending to not _like_ Lana Parrilla that time was way easier than it is now. Lana was single that time, so maybe Jen could have tried something with her, right? But unfortunately, she was too scared to try. Or better worded, she was gay panicking and is gay panicking now even more than before.

Thus, the orders of her bosses — unfortunately — had a big effect on her. She knew she had to avoid Lana one way or another, so she acted on it and became very unhappy with her actions. Her attraction had to be buried inside her soul so not even Jennifer would have to think about it. Obviously, it didn't work out. It always came crashing onto her face when the brunette wore those Evil Queen costumes that lifted her boobs so high… Yeah, Jennifer was pretty fucked up. She still is.

When Lana announced that she was getting married, Jennifer felt her heart break in tiny million pieces. Why did she feel that way? She still doesn't have _any_ idea.

Back to the present, Jennifer now had to deal with this new reality of her life. She had to face it with her head up, of course. _Damn_. It was already hard to hide her feelings being away from the brunette, and now they needed to be together for more _rehearsals_ and together as a _couple_.

Fuck. How could she hide her feelings now? How could she hide the staring?

Jennifer didn't have any choice, though. She actually needed to wait and finally see what would happen between them… She would wait to finally… _kiss Lana Parrilla._

"Jen? Jen, are you there?" fingers snapped on her face and she shook her head, coming out of a _long_ trance of memories.

"Yes, yes. Sorry. I was daydreaming or something."

"I see," Lana watched her with such intensity in her eyes that always made the blonde fidget uncomfortably. "Can we rehearse something now?"

"Sure," the blonde stood up from the couch. "We don't have the scripts yet… what can we do?"

"Josh and I used to rehearse the love scenes," Ginny commented while looking at the two women. "It helped a lot,” her television mom smirked. 

Jen's face blushed instantly. She couldn't believe Ginny had insinuated that Lana and she rehearse love scenes! Oh, my God, she felt her hands sweating already.

"Great, Ginny! That's exactly what we're going to do.”

Wait, what? Was Jen hearing correctly? Had Lana just said that? For _real?_ _Shit. Shit, shit, shit._

"I'll leave you two alone to it," Ginny grinned with mirth. "Have fun, girls! See you later."

Jen couldn't find more curse words to swear, seriously. She was totally screwed. When she heard the door being shut, she slumped back on the couch and started fidgeting with her hands.

"Are you okay, Jen?" 

She swallowed hard and lifted her head to face Lana. “Yes, I am.”

"Can we start, then?"

"Start what?" she pretended to misunderstand. Jennifer felt so stupidly nervous that she could punch herself in the face.

"To rehearse the love scenes," Lana sat on the couch beside Jen. "We can imagine a scene like… their first kiss. How do you think it's going to be?"

_Shit. Damn. Fuck._ Lana was extremely close to Jen's face. She was invading her personal space… _again_. Lana always did that to her. _Why, Lana? Why?!_

"I-I don't know, Lana. I haven't thought about that yet,” she leaned back slightly.

"Do you think a fan could pass out when they see us together?" 

Jen widened her eyes, not clearly understanding the question. "Wh-what?"

"They're so devoted to SwanQueen and, the things they say on Twitter, the way they freak out when we merely touch each other… just those minimal things caused them to scream so much and create lots of theories for the next episodes.”

"And how do you know that?"

"I stalk them when they're watching the episodes. You’ve never seen it?" the blonde shook her head negatively. "You should. It's also very funny," Lana chuckled.

"I should do a lot of things… that I don’t do,” the phrase came out loud from her mouth before Jen could prevent her tongue from speaking.

"What are these things?" a curious Lana asked.

"I mean, uh, Twitter. I should talk more with my fans, but-"

"I know. The CaptainSwan's fans are not so supportive, are they?" Jen shook her head again. "Don't worry about them. _Swens_ love you!"

"Swens?"

"That's how they call themselves,” Lana grinned, showing her beautiful white teeth. Her eyes examined Jen's face and stopped on the blonde's lips. Jennifer immediately started to sweat again.

_Fuck, this will never end._

"Soon we'll be able to wear our SwanQueen sweaters again!" Jen smiled a little nervously. It had been great that one time they went into the woods of Vancouver to explore; their SwanQueen sweaters on and a bright smile on their faces. Their attempt to take selfies were awful though. It was always a little bit blurred.

"Yeah, I hope so. I miss that time.”

Lana flashed a beautiful bright smile for her and added, “C'mon, stand up," she grasped Jen's hands and pulled her off of the couch. "Let's imagine together how their first kiss would be,” Lana intertwined their fingers, making Jen’s heart flutter at the gesture. _Stupid attraction._

Jen could barely breathe at this moment. Having Lana's hands on her own was overwhelming. The brunette had such warm, soft hands…

Oh, Jesus. Please, send help.

"I think it would be a cute scene,” the brunette continued. “They could be in Regina's vault, talking about problems, or _relationship_ problems. And suddenly Emma…" she stopped to gaze thoughtfully at Jen. "Who do you think it would be the first to kiss?"

Jen wondered, her mind crazy in thoughts about pressing Lana to a wall and kissing her passionately. _Fuck. Not that._ “I-I think Regina because she's the one in love with Emma."

"What? No. _Emma_ is in love with Regina. Emma will kiss first,” Lana said adamantly and Jen just smiled at that. _Right._

"Actually, I don't think so. Emma is…" Jen stopped right away when she realized what she was about to say. _Oh, shit._

"Emma is…?" the brunette encouraged her to continue.

"Nothing. Never mind."

"You can tell me, Jen. We're _friends_."

_Friends_. Jen sometimes hates this word.

She cleared her throat. “I mean… they're both in love with each other, so I think they should kiss… _together_ , you know what I mean?" Lana nodded. "But still, there's a problem."

"What is it?"

She took a deep breath before saying it, “Emma is _gay panicking_ …”

Lana narrowed her eyes at Jen and suddenly blurted out, "I _knew_ it!"

"Wait, what?"

"Every time Regina approaches Emma or invades her personal space, she takes a few steps back as if she’s scared of losing control."

Oh, God. Lana Parrilla just discovered Jen’s tactics to _not_ lose control. For fuck’s sake. 

"Yeah, uh-”

"But that's not on the script, though. I mean… is that something you added yourself to the character, Jen?" Jen’s eyes widened immediately at that. She wasn't expecting for this kind of question…

“Uh, no! I-I mean… maybe,” she watched as the brunette grinned widely.

"I like that," she took a step forward, now being very, _very_ close to Jennifer. "I would like to see Regina teasing Emma; invading her personal space and whisper in her ear.”

_Damn, why is she doing this?_

"Imagine if Regina is working hard in her vault to help Emma with something, as she always is, and at the end of the day, Emma goes there and brings a bottle of wine with her, offering some quiet time between best friends," Lana started whispering these words so close to Jen's ear, as if she was really Regina teasing Emma right now. "They both drink and talk about their happy — or not so happy — lives with boring boyfriends. Emma talks about Hook and Regina comes back with that line, _'You're too good for Hook'_ and drinks her wine glass very fast, showing — unintentionally — her jealousy for the blonde,” Lana now had both of her hands on the blonde's waist. Her mouth almost touching Jen's ear whilst she spoke. "Emma suddenly surprises Regina with a question that she wasn't expecting: _'Am I good for you?’._ Regina wants to scream that she totally is, but she can't do anything because she is in shock. So Emma makes the first move: she approaches Regina and puts her face on the curve of the brunette's neck, she-"

Lana stopped talking when she felt Jen move and do exactly what she had just said Emma would do with Regina. Jen watched as the brunette swallowed hard, clearly not expecting Jennifer to act on what she was saying.

"Am I good for you, Regina?" Jen repeated Lana's previous line as if the scene was happening right at the moment.

The blonde didn't know where this courage had come from. She had no idea of what she was doing right now… or _why_ she was doing it. Acting on this was totally dangerous, even though they were just rehearsing love scenes for the show. It could do a lot of damage to Jennifer in the future.

"Yes, Emma. You're good for me. Good enough,” the husky voice whispered in her ear. That brought goosebumps all over her body _._

Jen realized she had completely lost her mind when she started to leave soft kisses on the brunette's neck, causing the latter to jump a little in surprise.

"Emma…" she heard the soft gasp coming from Lana, Jen’s mouth drawing a path on the warm neck to her collarbone. "What about Hook?"

"Screw him. You're the one who matters,” Jen leaned back a few inches to gaze deeply into Lana's eyes, a hand reaching out to caress her cheek. Lana released a bright, beautiful smile and slowly leaned in, ready to kiss her.

Jen was freaking out inside. But either if she wanted to stop now, she couldn't. Her body was drowned in Lana's smell and the warmness of her body.

Her hands grabbed Lana's waist and pulled her body shape against herself. Their lips were so close now, it could touch at any time.

"Emma…" Lana breathed out the name once again before pressing her plump lips softly to Jen's.

The door shut open and an excited voice filled the trailer, "I heard the news! _Oh,_ ” they split apart like a flash, staring at Josh Dallas with wide eyes. Jen knew that her face was red like a tomato, but she couldn't _control_ it. She glanced at Lana and realized she was blushing as well, yet not so hard as Jen was. "Am I interrupting something?" he arched his eyebrows and both of them shook their heads negatively.

"We were just… rehearsing some new, uh, _movements_ ," Lana explained while walking towards Josh with a tight smiling. "I'm glad you heard the news."

Jen took a deep breath and put a smile on her face. She walked towards Josh and said awkwardly, "Hi _dad_!" she hugged him and continued. "I was just leaving. Um… See you later, Lana,” she forced a smile one last time and left that _fucking_ trailer.

The cold air in North Vancouver hit her face and she finally could breathe normally.

Fuck! Had just kissed Lana Parrilla? Oh my God, was that real? Well, it wasn't exactly a kiss, merely a peck, but… still. It felt so overwhelming to be that close to her; lost in time and in her sweet smell…

Jen was happy but was still panicking the hell out of it. She didn't know how she managed to act on Lana’s words so easily without gay panicking.

When she got to her trailer, she started realizing her uncomfortable it felt between her legs. Getting into the bathroom, she saw just how wet her panties were. _Damn,_ she felt so terribly aroused right now… and they hadn't even done anything!

"Lana, what have you done to me? Why am I so _fucking_ aroused just by the tone of your voice?" Jen asked herself, smiling and panicking at the same time.

God, she was so _screwed_.


	2. The Evil Queen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for kudos and comments on the last chapter! I'm very glad that you're enjoying the story. 
> 
> Reminder: this Morrilla fic was written in the year of 2016, so they were still filming season 6; it's based from then on, alright? Thanks.
> 
> Xoxo <3

**CHAPTER TWO**

**The Evil Queen**

 

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

Today was the day that they were going to receive the script with the new scenes. Jennifer was feeling so excited and yet so afraid and anxious at the same time… Her head was a huge mix of crazy emotions. 

With an extra large cup of coffee in her hands, she walked calmly around the set. She was really expecting _not_ to find anyone there now, especially someone named Lana Parrilla. She couldn't deal with her co-star right now. She wasn't ready to talk about SwanQueen, or anything involving lesbian couples. Jennifer just wanted to relax for a few hours before starting her day. Her night hadn't been one of the best since she wasn't able to sleep at all.

She entered her trailer and laid on the bed, her back on the mattress, her head towards the ceiling and her extra large coffee in her hands.

Her mind kept coming back to the almost-kiss. She remembered Lana's sweet fragrance filling her nose, the warm hands on her waist, the sexy voice speaking in her ear…

_Shit_. She couldn’t have these thoughts and feelings. Lana was married and that's wrong. _Stop it._

Jennifer closed her eyes for a minute trying to put away those crazy thoughts. She felt calm in the silence of her trailer, with caffeine in her veins.

But her relaxation was gone quickly when she heard the buzz of her phone. She reached it and saw the name of the person she _less_ wanted to talk to right now. _Lana Parrilla._

**_Lana: Hey Jen, good morning! I just arrived on set. Where are you?_ **

The blonde's heart started beating so fast that she almost lost her breath. 

“Shit, Lana. I was trying to hide from you,” Jen said to herself in the quietness of her trailer.

Jennifer didn't know what to do, though. She didn't know why Lana was talking to her now. It was too early, actually.

She looked warily at the screen of her phone, fingers trembling as she tried to type.

**_Jen: I’m in my trailer. Do you want to meet me right now?_ **

She was anxious about Lana's reply and she wouldn't know what to do if the woman was actually coming to her trailer to meet her.

**_Lana: Yes. I thought we could rehearse that scene from yesterday._ **

Fuck. Did she really want to rehearse the kiss again? _Fuck two._ Jen couldn't breathe.

She closed her eyes and took a deep, calming breath. She shouldn't be freaking out about this. That’s how her life was going to be from now on. Working and _rehearsing_ with Lana Parrilla full-time.

**_Jen: Okay. Do you want to come over?_ **

**_Lana: Yes, but not now. I was thinking that we could have coffee first. I haven't had breakfast yet._ **

Oh, wow. Lana wanted to have coffee with her? They haven't met for coffee in a _long_ time.

Before she could answer, another message appeared on her screen:

**_Lana: I bet you already bought coffee ‘cause I know you're addicted to it, but I think we should spend more time together since we're going to be a couple in the TV show._ **

So Lana Parrilla wanted to spend more time together, huh? Well, even though that was what Jennifer desired most, she couldn't trust herself being this close to Lana and not losing control. But an invitation like that, she couldn't say no.

**_Jen: Okay, it's fine for me. I don't have anything to do until 10._ **

**_Lana: Me neither. I came early to spend time with you and I think Adam will only give us the script later._ **

Jen suddenly felt warm by Lana’s words. She was always so lovely.

**_Lana: Want to meet at Tim Hortons?_ **

**_Jen: Sure. See you there._ **

* * *

 

**_&_ **

When Jen arrived at Tim Hortons, Lana was already there. She saw the blonde and quickly walked towards her to greet her with a warm hug. Jen was getting used to this… Hugging Lana all the time was good, just like a few years ago.

"I'm glad you accepted my invitation. I know I can be too invasive sometimes, but that's because I'm too excited for Emma and Regina to be together,” Jen chuckled sheepishly.

"It's fine, Lana. You're just being _you_ ,” the other woman grinned at her.

"Thank you, Jen," she gave the blonde another quick hug and pulled her inside the coffeeshop.

They sat at a table in the corner where there was no one, or no fan to bother them, since SwanQueen wasn't yet declared canon on the TV Show. Lana sat on one booth and Jennifer at the other, facing the brunette.

"Black coffee?" Lana asked and Jen nodded promptly. "You're nothing like Emma Swan, are you?"

Jen smiled before speaking, "Just a little. Well, and you're nothing like Regina Mills either," Lana raised her eyebrows. "I bet you're going to order a _latte_ , the contrary of what Regina Mills would order."

“Yeah, I don't like black coffee. It's too bitter for me."

Jen chuckled. "Right."

"Do you know what some fans say?" Lana started between whispers as if what she was telling was a secret that needed to be protected.

"What?" the blonde asked in a whisper, imitating her co-star.

"They say that with my style of clothes I look like Emma Swan, and you look like Regina Mills. For them, it’s like we are the contrary of our characters in real life."

"Wow, that's weird," Jen narrowed her eyes. "Do you agree with them?"

"Well, sometimes yes. You come to work dressed like a goddess,” Jen raised her eyebrows and a smirk started to appear on her face.

"I don't come to work dressed like a goddess," she rolled her eyes at the brunette, but her smile wouldn't leave her face. "I just like to be… _tidy_."

Lana laughed. "See? That's your side of Regina Mills. And me, I prefer comfy clothes instead of dresses and skirts."

"Well, now the fans make a little bit of sense,” Jen raised her hand, calling the waitress. She ordered a black coffee for her and a latte for Lana.

When the waitress was gone, Lana spoke again, "They do make a lot of sense in many things, you know. I've read some theories that they created that are _so_ true! It's incredible how far their imagination can go."

"I've read that book you showed me. It's a good fanfiction. I really liked it."

"Which one are you talking about?"

"Wow, there's more?" Jen's eyes widened.

"Yes, of course! There is a lot of fanfiction out there, but books that I know, only three published so far."

Jen stayed in silence for a minute. Her hand was on her chin again, and she was thinking if she should or not say to Lana that she _knew_ how many fanfictions were out there and that she read some of them too.

"I completely love fanfictions. Once I start reading, I can't stop. It's so addicting,” Lana exclaimed excitedly and took a sip of her latte when the waitress stopped by to leave their orders.

"Yeah, it's really interesting," Jen bit her lower lip and looked at the gregarious brunette in front of her. 

Damn, she was so cute and beautiful. It was their second day of spending time together for a long time, and Jennifer was already feeling her heart melt for that woman.

She truly must have some evil powers to make people feel this way… Jen wasn't the only one falling for Lana Parrilla. Her fans were also completely crazy about her. And Jen understood them _completely_.

"What are you thinking?"

Jen blinked three times before realizing what she had been asked. "What?"

"You were daydreaming again."

"Oh, I'm sorry. There are too many thoughts in my head," she chuckled awkwardly.

"Mine too. Since yesterday I could barely sleep because of SwanQueen. I see that the fans are sad on Twitter, losing their hopes about the ship and that made me feel hopeless too, but now that I know it's going to happen, I can't wait until they see us together."

_See us together,_ well, Jen wanted this in real life too. She wanted to be with Lana, to be able to kiss her all the time, to be her… _Damn_ … She had to stop. This was going too far. Jennifer couldn’t think like that. Lana had a husband.

Without noticing, she sighed heavily from the conflict in her thoughts. Lana stared at her, seeming to study her expressions but not being able to understand a thing.

"Jen, are you okay?" a hand reached out and grasped her cheek.

The blonde smiled weakly at her and nodded in response. She was anything _but_ okay, actually. She felt angry and hopeless because she couldn't prevent her heart from breaking in tiny little pieces once again.

"You don't seem okay. Did I say something wrong?" Lana still had her hand on Jen's face, her eyes deep in concern as she locked eyes with the blonde.

"No, it's just…" Jen put her hand on Lana's and held there. "I'm happy that we're together… as friends, I mean. I missed this."

Well, that wasn't a lie. She was happy to be able to spend more time with her co-star, yes, but her stupid heart didn't cooperate sometimes.

"Don't worry, dear. Everything now is going to be like old times, maybe even better,” Lana's eyes locked with hers intently, almost not even blinking as she spoke. Jen tried to flash Lana a better smile because the woman totally deserved it. It wasn't her fault that Jennifer had feelings for her. It wasn't Lana’s fault when she decided to get married. She loved someone else and Jennifer had lost her chance and now she had to accept it.

When they left Tim Hortons, they were almost late for rehearsals with the crew. Jen had to go rehearse with Aladdin and Jasmine, and Lana with Ginny and Josh. Before going, Lana said that she would meet Jennifer after lunch in her trailer so they could read the script together.

Time passed fast, Jen finished rehearsing and soon her stomach claimed for food. She still hadn't gotten the script from Adam yet, but she was so hungry that she couldn't wait to eat. Thus, the script was something to get later.

She arrived in her trailer and went to her purse to get the fruit salad she had brought from home. While eating her delicious salad, Jen grabbed her phone and started checking on Twitter. She didn't do that for a long time, so she decided to check her mentions and saw a lot of tweets from her fans:

**_I love you._ **

**_Love you, babe_ **

**_You're amazing._ **

**_I miss you here._ **

**_Please, talk to us._ **

She felt bad for not being around. She shouldn't do that, right? No, she shouldn’t. An idea came to Jen's mind and she decided to post BTS pics of Sun Dogs. Pictures of herself and the crew. That would be awesome, right? She would keep in touch with her fans and show them more of her job. Perfect!

After announcing the #30daysofsundogs and posting the first picture, she came back to her fruit salad a lot happier than before. She really should take some bits of advice from Lana, the woman was totally right. She knew exactly how to deal with her fans.

After finishing her food, she grabbed the script from episode 6.04 and started to read her lines again. She stood up and walked towards the mini-kitchen to get some water. She noticed that in the previous episodes, there weren't too many SwanQueen scenes. Emma was always with Hook or trying to save her own life. To be honest, she wasn't thinking _at all_ that SwanQueen was going to happen. It was impressive how the plot of this season was going to turn into a completely different way. She was excited, though.

Suddenly the door of her trailer was opened and Lana entered without permission; script in hands.

"Jen! Thank God you're here," she approached the blonde. "Have you seen the new script?" Jen noticed that Lana was a bit out of breath; it looked like she had come running to her trailer. What was wrong?

"No, I didn't have time to get mine yet. Why? What happened?"

"The first SwanQueen kiss is nothing like we imagined!" Lana exclaimed, seeming a little bit angry.

"How it is, then?" Jen asked as she took a sip of her water.

"The Evil Queen kisses Emma first,” Jen spits water from her mouth immediately when she hears the name Evil Queen.

What the hell?!

" _What?!_ "

Lana chuckled at Jen’s reaction, leaning in closer to hold the blonde’s shoulder reassuringly. “Are you okay?” Jen nodded, so the brunette continued. “The Evil Queen is going to kiss Emma in front of Regina. Can you believe in such audacity?” 

Jennifer was wide-eyed. She never imagined she’d have to kiss or do anything romantically with Lana dressed as the Evil Queen. _Fuck_. That was clearly too much for Jen to bear. She would melt in front of that woman right away.

"Well, I thought she was just going to tease Emma, but it turns out that she's going to kiss her before Regina. Shit," Lana looked at the script in her hands and then locked her intense brown eyes with the green ones. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I think. Wow, I'm very… _surprised_. Let me see if I got this right: the Evil Queen is going to kiss Emma in front of Regina, and Emma will kiss her… _back?"_

"Apparently, she is. See for yourself," Lana handed her the script. Jennifer started to read aloud, so Lana could listen:

_“Emma and Regina are in the vault trying to solve Emma’s problems with the curse when the Evil Queen appears. Both women are startled by the Queen's presence.”_

Jen stops reading to take a look at her co-star, who had her hands on her waist just like Regina did sometimes. She read the Evil Queen's lines in her mind and began reading aloud again when the kissing part appeared:

_“The Evil Queen pulls Emma by the jacket and kiss her on the lips. Emma is shocked by the Queen's movements but soon leans into the kiss, not being able to hold herself any longer. Regina just watches, dumbfounded, as her counterpart kisses Emma Swan.”_

She stopped again to stare at Lana with surprise. "Wow. That's really… uh, _crazy_.”

"Yes, it is. Well, but that certainly helps with their relationship. They were too afraid to say or do something to one another, so now the Evil Queen took the first step. She seems to still care about her other half though."

"She does. And she also cares about Emma. I thought she didn't."

"Maybe deep inside she's able to feel what Regina feels. And what Regina feels for Emma, well, it's really strong,” Jen smiled at that. 

"Do you know when we're going to film this scene?"

"Adam said that we will film it tomorrow in the afternoon."

Jen's heart jumped a beat. _Shit_. She really hoped that Lana's Evil Queen costume wasn't very sexy in that scene. How could she focus while Lana's boobs were right in front of her eyes? While they _kiss?_ Fuck. Jen was fucked. _Literally_.

"Um, okay then. I hope the fans like this… _surprise_." 

"Believe me, Jen. They are going to freak the hell out,” Lana smirked knowingly and Jen couldn't prevent a sheepish grin from appearing on her lips. "Do you mind if I come here around eight tomorrow, so we can rehearse this scene?"

"Yes, sure. We have to rock in this scene!" Jen did a movement where she turned her hand into a fist and lifted it in the air excitedly.

Lana laughed out loud and leaned in again to give Jen a tight hug. "You're awesome, JMo."

"Thank you, Lana. You're awesome too,” they were still in the embrace, both feeling the warmth of each other's body. "Do you think the fans are going to pass out?"

Lana's funny laugh was heard again. "Well, I hope they freak out of happiness, but don't pass out for real,” she pulled away from the blonde's arms to look at her face. “I’ve been thinking… we could watch together this episode. Just like old times. What do you think?”

"Yeah, that's a good idea. We can do a ladies’ night and invite Ginny and Rebecca too."

Inviting more people was a good idea. Just imagine Jen and Lana at the same room, watching the episode, without rehearsing anything… How would that go? Jennifer couldn't let things come to that. Who knew for how long she could control herself? Well, she wasn't as strong as Emma Swan.

"Great! I love it. Now I have to go, I have more scenes to film. See you tomorrow, Jen!” Lana placed a chaste kiss on the blonde's cheek and walked towards the door.

"Oh-okay. See you tomorrow!"

Lana left and Jen waited for her heart to calm. _Oh, my God._ The Evil Queen kissing Emma Swan and Lana Parrilla kissing Jennifer's cheek as if they were very _intimate_. But friends did that, right? With no intentions? Jennifer could handle this. She  _will_  surely control herself.


	3. Don't Waste Your Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From now on I will be posting regularly on Mondays and Fridays.
> 
> Thank you for comments and kudos ;)

**CHAPTER THREE**

**Don’t Waste Your Time**

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

Jen woke up early with anxiety since today was the day she would _pass out_ in front of the whole cast. Okay, maybe it won't come to that. Maybe she'll just forget her lines and act weird. Well, she was surely prepared and knew all her lines, so maybe that's not what was going to happen either. Maybe nothing bad was going to happen, right? It's just a kiss between Emma Swan and The Evil Queen. Nothing more. Nothing to be worried about.

Her cellphone buzzed and she viewed Lana’s name on the screen.

**_Lana: I’m heading towards the set right now. Meet you in your trailer, xoxo._ **

Jen took a deep, calming breath before typing back:

**_Jen: See ya, xoxo._ **

After 10 minutes, Jen was getting off of her car and heading towards her trailer. Another XL coffee in her hands to start off the day. When she was approaching her trailer, she saw Lana already there with a huge smile on her face. She immediately smiled back and observed the brunette, who now was checking on her phone. Lana seemed to be having fun with her cellphone as she moved it around, seeming to… take… pictures. Did she just take pictures of Jennifer?

"Did you just-”

"Yes, I did. You look stunning today, Jen. Goddess really fits you."

"Oh," she blushed, causing Lana to laugh heartily. "Uh, thanks."

“Want to see the picture?"

Jen nodded and approached the brunette. “Oh," she muttered when Lana took another picture of her, now of her face.

Lana started to laugh again at Jen's face on the picture. "You're funny, Jen, look at your expression!”

“Oh, my God this picture is horrible!" Jen complained as she stared at Lana’s cellphone.

"Oh no, you look beautiful all the time. And don't worry, I won't post it anywhere. Well, at least not today," Jen narrowed her eyes at Lana who just chuckled again. "Now smile!" Lana quickly took another picture, now of her and Jen together. She was making a funny face and Jen was looking at the brunette, not understanding what was happening.

"Lana!" Jen pretended to be angry at Lana, which made the brunette laugh even more.

"I like this picture! We're cute."

“Uh, yeah. It's been a long time since we took a picture together.”

“Yeah," Lana nodded with a sad expression. "But now we can again! Let's take another one," Jen smiled and pressed her cheek against Lana's. The pic was shot with both of them smiling happily to the camera. “Awesome, I love it,” Jen nodded with a smile and kept eyes on Lana.

Damn, she was so beautiful. How can a person be so stunning like this? She could lose herself in Lana's ocean of brown, intense eyes forever. Her beauty was breathtaking! Shit. She was probably staring at her like a fool right now.

"So, uh, may we go in?" Lana asked while Jennifer kept looking at her intently.

"Sure," Jen opened the door of her trailer and entered with Lana trailing behind her. "What are we... um, you know, _rehearse?_ "

"The kiss, of course," Lana grinned and Jen was brought back to the night before when she almost kissed Lana. _Oh, God._

“Oh, okay…" Jen cleared her throat uncomfortably.

Lana approached the blonde with a smile on her face. Jen's hands were trembling, so she put them behind her back to hide it from Lana. "So, um, do we really _need_ to rehearse the kiss?" her voice failed slightly and she cursed herself for such stupidity.

"Why? You don't want to?" Lana's smile slowly faded away.

"Uh, no, that's not what I meant. Actually... uh, have you rehearsed the love scenes with Sean or something? Because I’ve never done that with Colin.”

Lana blinked rapidly, seeming to realize just now what they were going to do. "No, I haven't. But I really think that we could do that before we film the scene. I want it to be perfect, and I think you want it too.”

Jen nodded, still a little reluctant. "You're right. Let's do it."

Lana smiled again and leaned in; her face just a few inches from Jen's.

"You're just going to act like the Evil Queen now or just... _kiss_ me?"

"Which one do you prefer?"

It was clear to Jen what she desperately wanted. But she obviously couldn't say that. She would never imply anything related to her attraction to Lana. She couldn’t. The woman is _married_.

Jennifer was caught by surprise when warm hands grasped her face,getting even closer. Jen couldn't help her heart from pounding hard against her ribcage. Fuck. _Heart, now it's not the time._

"Are you shaking?" Lana asked in a concerned tone, which made Jen widen her eyes since she had been discovered by her co-star.

"No, no I'm not," Jen tried to pull away from Lana's touch, but the latter simply held her in place.

"Have you kissed a woman before?" Lana's fingers moved to Jen's thin lips, where she started to caress softly with her thumbs.

It had been in elementary school when Jen was just ten years old. She thought the brunette girl named Melissa from her band class was really pretty. One day, after their presentation to the school, while celebrating the achievement, Jennifer was so happy that she grabbed Melissa’s face and placed a soft, quick kiss on her lips. When she realized what she had done, she panicked immediately and ran away, never wanting to speak with Melissa again. It had been her fault, yes, but she decided that it was best if she didn't keep contact with Melissa.

So technically Jennifer hadn't really kissed a woman for real… Lana would be her first.

"Ye-yes," Jen answered, despite her past, and watched as the brunette smiled and licked her plump lips, getting closer. Jen could already feel the hot, fresh air of Lana's breath against her mouth.

If the world was going to end now, Jen would totally be satisfied. Seeing Lana acting like this with her, ready to kiss her as if nothing else mattered, she would totally die happy after feeling the other woman’s lips on hers.

"Me too."

Their bodies were pressing slightly against each other, softly feeling the warmth. When Lana's mouth was about to touch Jen's, a loud ring was heard in the room. It was Lana's cellphone.

They were both startled by the sudden noise and split apart once again. Lana sighed and reached to grab her phone, which had the name Adam on the screen.

"It's Adam,” Jen nodded and waited for Lana to answer. "Hi Adam, how are you? Oh, okay. Yes. Yes, she's with me," Lana looked at Jen and smiled one more time. "Oh, we need to film _now?_ I thought it was going to be in the afternoon. Oh, okay. We were just rehearsing.”

Jen listened attentively to the conversation in front of her. She was still scared as fuck by the sudden ringtone and scared of Lana's _actions_. Damn, that woman was driving Jennifer completely crazy.

"Fine. We're going now. No problem. We can rehearse for the next scenes. Okay, bye,” she hung up and looked at Jen, who had her hands in her back pockets. "We need to go, the filming will start now."

"Oh okay,” Jen smiled sheepishly. Deep down she couldn't decide if she was happy or sad that the kiss didn't happen. She was feeling so scared and yet so _aroused_. God, why she was like this? She shouldn't feel this way about Lana. She had to fight against this.

"Too bad we didn't have enough time to rehearse at least a kiss. Damn it, I hope the scene still goes well.”

"Don't worry, Lana. We know our lines and where to move. It's going to be easy."

“You’re right. Let's go.”

* * *

&

Jennifer was finally ready with Emma Swan's full costume and makeup. She was heading towards Regina's vault where she would meet Adam (who truly insisted that he wanted to be present during the filming of this scene), the crew and her co-star Lana Parrilla, _fucking_ fully dressed as the _Evil Queen._

As she walked the short path to where the vast was located, Jen decided to take deep breaths and _not_ freak the hell out. Lana was going to be in a simple costume which she was already used to, and she’s just going to act perfectly like she always does. And the kiss... Well, the kiss was finally going to happen, whether she wanted it or not.

A few minutes later, everything in the vault was set for the scene. Only a few people were there, since this scene was a secret one if we can say that way.

Soon, someone said that Lana had arrived. Jen’s started beating fast immediately, just by listening to the brunette’s name. 

_Keep calm, Jennifer Morrison._ _You can do this,_ she muttered mentally to herself. _You can look at Lana's boobs and pretend it doesn't affect you at all. You are an amazing actress and you can definitely do this without panick-_

Well, fuck.

Lana appeared in front of her dressed in a fucking red, corset dress full of diamonds in the front, showing a great amount of cleavage. Her hair had been made with long, dark curls, tied on the top of her head. Jen could barely breathe with that vision. And it got even worse when Lana approached her with a grin on her red-painted lips.

"Are you ready, Jen?"

The blonde licked her lips nervously, averting her eyes from Lana's cleavage to the piercing brown eyes.

"Yes. Let's do it.”

"So first we're filming Emma with the Evil Queen and the kiss they're going to share. Then, we film Emma and Regina in the vault before the Evil Queen appears. Then, we go again to where the Queen vanishes and only Emma and Regina stay in the vault. Okay with that?" Adam spoke in a serious tone.

Lana and Jen nodded firmly, getting very concentrated. Well, kinda… because it was difficult for Jen to fully concentrate with someone like Lana in front of her… dressed as the Evil Queen.

"Ready?" The director asked and they nodded in response. "Okay. Action!"

**[ACTUAL SCENE HAPPENING]**

**Emma and Regina were in the vault; they were sitting on top of a chest, close to each other, their elbows touching slightly. Regina had called Emma to go there since she was needing a friend to talk to, but she also needed to solve the town's problems with the Sheriff/Saviour. And it was good to have Emma there. But the Mayor had been drinking lately, and Emma noticed that when she arrived. She couldn't blame Regina, though. She was also feeling upset lately. Instead of judging the brunette, Emma started drinking apple cider with Regina too, trying to forget the outside world for some hours.**

**It had been three hours already since Emma had arrived in the vault. They were lost in time and in conversation like nothing else mattered but them right there. They were laughing together as if there were no problems in the world for them to take care of. Two saviours having a break together.**

**"I lived to see this day coming,” the Evil Queen appeared in the vault, surprising both women who were each with a glass of apple cider in their hands.**

**"Wow," Emma murmured, very startled about the Evil Queen's presence.**

**"What are you doing here?" Regina stood up, a fireball appearing in her right hand as fury flared in her brown eyes.**

**"I'm here to do something you’ve never had the courage to do it," the Evil Queen smirked when she saw Regina widening her eyes, knowing exactly what her evil half was up to.**

**Regina looked at Emma who was — particularly drunk — looking from Regina to her counterpart. A quick movement from the Evil Queen and Emma was in her arms. She pulled the blonde by the leather jacket against her own body, making Emma gasp in surprise, just like Regina, who was petrified by her evil half sudden movements.**

**"Watch it, Regina," that was the Evil Queen's last words before she crashed her lips onto Emma’s. The blonde opened her eyes in surprise but soon fell for the soft lips on hers.**

"Cut!" the director's voice was heard and they pulled apart immediately. Both of them stared at him and Adam, who had his hand on his chin, seeming to observe the scene very closely. "That was awesome, but… I want it to be _sexier_. Lana, I want to see the Evil Queen dominating Emma, more than she did with Gold."

Lana nodded and looked at Jen who was blushing sheepishly. If Lana was going to be sexier than she already was, Jennifer would definitely melt right in front of her and the whole crew. "Are you okay, Jen?"

“Uh, yes… Let's go on."

"And Jen?" Adam called her name. "Remember that you're a little drunk, so live in the moment with the Queen,” she nodded one more time and turned to Lana who had a seductive smile on her face.

_Fuck, woman. Have some mercy._

"Action!"

**Her body started trembling as the Evil Queen's hand touched her hair, pulling hard to the side so she could have the blonde's neck exposed.**

**Emma moaned when she felt the hot tongue of the Queen in her pulse point. She could also hear Regina's gasp and a hand trying to reach the Queen.**

**Regina wanted to move, but she couldn't. That scene was so _erotic!_ She could barely breathe; Regina wanted to be kissing Emma herself right now, but seeing her counterpart dominating the Saviour with such power, taking the lead… just like she would have done. Well, it was pretty overwhelming.**

**Emma gasped when the Evil Queen's lips found hers again, this time thrusting her tongue into the blonde's mouth with ease. Her movements were erotic, and it was bringing a whole lot of goosebumps to Emma’s body.**

**Soon enough, Regina finally was able to move towards them and pulled the Evil Queen away from Emma. The Queen huffed in displeasure as she was almost thrown against the wall by Regina.**

**"Why did you do this?” The Mayor hissed, her nostrils flaring with rage.**

**The Queen's malicious smile made Regina even angrier. She was ready to punch her evil half in the face if she tried to touch Emma again. "I did this so you can open your eyes! Regina, dear, you're wasting your time. When I was in inside you, we used to work better. Now look at you,” her counterpart muttered in distaste.**

**Regina bit the inside of her cheek to control herself. "I'm totally fine _without_ you."**

**"I can see that," she spoke with sarcasm. "Now that you're feeling something _real_ for someone, you don't have the courage to say it."**

**"I'm not feeling anything!" Regina said loud, calling Emma's attention who was only observing the two women talking to each other between whispers.**

**“Regina," Emma approached cautiously, causing Regina to turn and look at her immediately with wide eyes.**

**Emma couldn't listen to what the Evil Queen was saying. She couldn't know Regina had feelings for her. Not now and not _ever_.**

**"Emma, I'm sorry," she said apologetically.**

**"Oh no, she's not," the Queen approached, dragged Emma's chin and kissed her lips one more time.**

**"Stop!" Regina hissed in anger, pulling her evil half's arm away from Emma. "Emma, don't come any closer,” she pushed the Queen towards the wall and clenched her hand around the brunette's neck to stop her from moving.**

**"Regina, I-” Emma tried to approach but Regina's hand was held up telling her to stop.**

**“No, Emma."**

**"Don't choke me, dear," the Queen said, using her hands to caress Regina's arm that was directed at her throat. "You know if I die, _you_ die. And we both know you don't want to die before kissing Em-" Regina's hands squeezed the neck stronger, silencing the Queen.**

**She turned to her, now clenching both hands around her neck, squeezing harder. "I'm tired of you _ruining_ my life!" The Queen smiled maliciously as if knowing that this would happen if she provoked Regina.**

**"Regina, don't do that. You know what happens if you kill her,” Emma interrupted, standing very close to Regina. The brunette could see the blonde's eyes deep in concern. "Stop, Regina. Please," Regina's hands were shaking while holding the Queen's neck. The latter knew that her good half wouldn't do such a thing. Regina wouldn't kill anyone anymore.**

**She let go of the Queen's neck and walked towards the other wall, resting her hands there to calm herself.**

**"Listen to what I'm saying, Regina," the Queen spoke again. "Don't waste your time until it's too late."**

**Regina said nothing in response. She just kept looking at the wall, trying to control herself.**

**"And _you_ Emma Swan, I hope you don't make the same mistake as Regina,” she pressed another kiss on Emma's lips and disappeared in a purple smoke.**

**Regina quickly turned to face Emma, her eyes in a deep black. "Did she just kiss you again?"**

**“Uh, yes… she did,” the brunette snarled, put her hands on her waist and started pacing in the vault.**

**"I am really, _really_ sorry, Emma. I wasn't expecting for her to do this,” the blonde shuddered, remembering the heated kiss.**

**"Well, that was… _wow_."**

**"Wow? What do you mean with that?"**

**"Hum, I… I mean, she's just like you. She has your face, your hair, your smell, your body…"**

**Regina's heart skipped a beat and she walked towards the blonde. "Did you like kissing her?"**

**"I just… I…" she stammered but continued. "I have a boyfriend,” she looked at Regina, seeming slightly confused by what had just happened.**

**"I know… I'm sorry,” Regina said as she stepped even closer. Her heart was beating like crazy and she wanted to slap Emma in the face for remembering about that damn boyfriend.**

**"Don't be sorry. It's okay."**

**Regina involuntarily reached her hand to touch Emma's face, wanting to finally feel the soft flesh. The blonde's eyes gazed at her intently, trying to understand what was happening.**

**"You have lipstick here," she slowly rubbed the thin lips with her thumb, cleaning all the lipstick there. "Are you sure you're okay?"**

**"Yes, don't worry,” Emma smiled weakly while putting her hands on top of Regina's.**

"Cut! Oh, my God, that was amazing! Congratulations! You totally rocked!" the director said with a grin. Adam was smiling as well, but he didn't say anything.

Lana was already with Regina's clothes, which was making it easier for Jen to concentrate. She agreed that the scene ended perfectly, even though they didn't have time to rehearse completely.

"Lana, Jen, you're free for your break. You were great today! Thank you for that,” they both smiled happily at the director and left the vault.

They were walking in the grass, towards the main set. The wind was blowing and they were still in costume. Jen noticed that Lana had a smile on her face… Well, she was feeling pretty happy too, she just didn't demonstrate sometimes. Her feelings were a complete mess right now, after kissing Lana Parrilla for real. _Fuck. That woman knows how to kiss._

"What do you think about our scene?"

"It was great, you- uh, we did really well.”

"Yeah, I think that too,” Lana grinned. "I'm so excited to watch the episode,” she clapped her hands in an excited gesture.

"Me too. This time, I want to be on twitter to see the fans' reactions.”

"Oh yeah, we must be," the brunette chuckled. "Hey, do you want to come over on next Sunday?" she stopped Jen from walking by touching her shoulder. "We could watch the episode together and see the fans' reactions as well.”

“Uh, yeah, sure.”

That was a terrible idea. _Shit_. Jen would freak out if she went to Lana's house to stay with her and her _husband_.

"Fred won't be here next Sunday, so we will have the house only for us."

Well, now it seemed like a better option, right? But staying alone with Lana was a really good idea?

"Sure. Uh, want to invite Ginny?"

"Yes. But I'm not sure she's going. Two kids to take care of… well, that's difficult."

“Probably," Jen nodded. "So, we can figure this out later. Let's eat now, I'm hungry."

Jen started walking again but was suddenly pulled back by the brunette into her arms. Lana hugged her tight, making Jen feel the hot warmth coming from her body. It was a terrific sensation. _God_. Why was Lana like this? So _unpredictable?_ Jen could have died from this sudden movement!

"You were great. Thank you."

"You too,” she murmured in the crook of the brunette's neck, feeling her heart crush slowly inside her chest.


	4. She's Finally Free

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Sorry for the late update. Thanks for the 100 kudos, I'm really happy you're enjoying it.
> 
> See you on Monday!

**CHAPTER FOUR**

**She’s Finally Free**

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

What could Jen say about kissing Lana Parrilla? Well, she could talk all day about it. She could still feel the shivers that her body received; she could still feel the soft lips against her own; the hot tongue mixing with hers, feeling the amazing taste...

_Oh damn_. Imagine being able to kiss that woman every day? 

Shit, it was time to stop thinking about this. Jen had to remember that Lana was married and they were going to be a couple _only_ on TV. Nothing else would happen between them.

The rest of the week, they had to film other scenes, and surprisingly,none of them was a SwanQueen one. Jen was glad, though. Imagine going through kissing scenes with Lana Parrilla every day? That wouldn't work out well. Jen was a professional, obviously, but when it came to Lana, everything seemed to change, and she realized that she could barely control her own actions.

However, there was still something to worry about. Lana had invited her to go to her house on Sunday, and they invited Ginny too, but she couldn’t come, just like Lana had said. So now Jen would have to stay alone with Lana in her house where she lived with her husband. Really fucked up, wasn't it? That's so _bad_. Jen wasn't feeling well about going _there_. Even though Lana thought they were just friends, Jen had strong feelings for the brunette that she felt immensely _guilty_ about it. Lana's husband didn't deserve that. But Jen didn't deserve to be in pain either. _Fuck_. Why having feelings for someone had to be so complicated?

* * *

 

&

On Monday of the next week, they started filming very early in the morning. Jen was very tired, but happy at the same time. They had to rehearse with the cast, almost everyone was there, including Lana and Sean. Well, Sean was back because his character had _revived_ on the show. Did Jen know exactly why? No. Did she know how the writers were going to make SwanQueen canon with Hook and Robin still on the show? She had no idea.

Her parents used to say that she was a very jealous woman, but Jen didn't agree. She was a little bit jealous, but not in an _extreme_ way. Although, when it comes to her co-star Lana Parrilla, Jen can’t help but feel constantly _jealous_. At least she considers herself a very good actress and is able to pretend that she is feeling _nothing_ when it comes to her co-star.

She never felt good about seeing Lana kissing Sean on the show. She _envied_ that man. And she shouldn't.

The rehearsal with the cast was making her happy, though. They were all laughing, having fun, teasing each other. Jen noticed that Lana was taking pictures of lots of people during the breaks. It was so fun, seeing her in that funny way that only she had, taking pictures of Jared, Robert, Josh, and Sean. She kind of wanted Lana to take pictures of her, too. _Ugh, why does she do this to herself?_ Lana had taken pictures of her and _with_ her the week before, so she shouldn't envy the others she was taking pictures of right now _._

Today had been cold. They were all wearing big and warm coats to protect themselves from the Canadian wind. Jen was laughing but still remained quiet most of the time, focused on the scene she had to film. She was also observing her co-star by the corner of her eye, not letting anyone notice, of course. Because she was definitely too _subtle._

As Jen kept observing the cast, she started feeling kind of _lonely_. She hadn't had many scenes with Lana since that day, and because of that and Sean back on the show, Jen didn't get so much of her attention either. Maybe she was just too busy to come and talk to her… or to just have coffee together, right? Or maybe she just didn't want to anymore. _Ugh._ Jen shouldn't be thinking about this right now. Actually, she shouldn't think about this _at all._

Now, they were all in their marks to keep going with the rehearsal. Jen had to go first and walk towards Giles Matthey, the new actor who joined the show. Then, the others would start to walk after her. When it was over, Jen smiled at how well it had gone. She saw Lana smiling as well, and then she noticed that the smile was directed at her. And, all of a sudden, she watched as Lana started walking fast towards her.

Fuck. She's coming.

Lana raised her right hand as if asking for a high five and Jen immediately slapped her hand back. Lana grinned and put her arm on Jen's shoulder, giving her an awkward side hug. Damn. Jen felt tense by this sudden movement and, God, Lana Parrilla. How can you be so unpredictable?

Jen hugged her back, returning the grin. They separated quickly, and Jen walked to her mark where she would start rehearsing the scene again. Fuck, her heart was racing. Her hands were sweating even though she was wearing gloves. Damn, Lana. Holy fuck.

The director gave the sign and the scene started all over again. When it finished, Jen saw Josh coming towards her and she opened her arms instantly. He pulled her off of the ground and whirled her in a hug. She couldn't help but laugh out loud by the unexpected gesture.

She felt so happy after that. Not even a little bit lonely anymore. The rehearsals were perfect and she felt great about her acting. And Lana had hugged her because of her _potential_ , right? Because, otherwise, why would she? Did she miss Jennifer and that's why she hugged her? Let's stay with the first option. It makes more sense.

* * *

 

&

Later that day, Jen and Lana finally had another scene together, this time just the two of them with the crew. During the break, Lana had her cellphone in hands, seeming to capture every corner of the set through pictures. Jen smiled at that. Lana was so cute.

"Oh my God, Jen! Stop. Don't move."

The blonde stopped immediately, staying with her back towards Lana, not moving an inch.

"What? What's happening? There's a bug on my back?"

Lana chuckled. "No, silly. You just look too beautiful in front of this wall. I'm gonna take a picture of you.” 

Jen smiled tenderly, feeling her heart getting warm. "Okay."

"Oh, you look so stunning!" Jen could hear the _clicks_ of the pictures being taken. She hadn't moved a muscle since Lana asked her to stop. “Here, take a look," the brunette approached and showed the photo to Jen.

"Don't you think it's too dark?"

"Well, a little bit. Maybe we should change the angle,” Lana moved to the other light screen and took a pic of the sight. "Here it looks better. Come here, Jen."

Jen obeyed and stood with her back towards Lana again, in front of the light screen.

"Hey Jen, move a little," Jen did what she was asked. "Moving in front of the light screen is making a lovely silhouette!"

"Good," she responded, doing her poses.

"See," Lana showed her cellphone to Jen and the latter smiled.

"Wow, that's cool!"

"You know, I think we need more light.”

"Yeah, that would probably help."

Lana looked at the crew who were close to them and asked if they could get more light for the picture.

"Come here, Lana,” one of the light production guy said and she walked towards him. "I'm gonna change and you see the tone you want, okay?" she nodded while he pressed some buttons. "What do you think?"

"That's good, um… can I just move the spotlight a little bit?"

"Yes, sure.”

"Thank you, Marcus,” she smiled at him and looked around. "Oh, there's a sword there! Can I use it?"

“Absolutely," she thanked him again and walked back to the light screen.

"Hold the sword, Jen,” the blonde grabbed the sword and saw Lana walking straight to a big lamp that was positioned close to the light screen.

Jennifer giggled when she saw the brunette lifting her feet and leaning on her toes to reach the lamp. Lights were quickly adjusted and Lana came back to take another set of photos of Jen.

"Go, Saviour. Lift your sword towards the ceiling. Let's see how this works out,” Jen wanted to laugh about Lana's professional tone of a photographer. She did laugh, though. But she made sure that the brunette couldn't see it. "Perfect, JMo!"

Jen looked over her shoulder to grin at the beautiful, funny brunette. "Should I do something else?"

"Yes. Put your head a little bit down but keep holding the sword up,” Jen did what she said, knowing that with Lana's efforts, the photo was going to be perfect. "I'm covering all the angles, don't worry!"

Jen tried to look at Lana by the corner of the eye and saw the brunette lowering her legs and snapping the camera towards Jen's whole body. Oh, she was literally covering _all_ angles.

"Done. Here, see if you like,” Lana showed the cellphone to Jen again.

"Wow! It's awesome! The picture looks amazing,” the brunette smiled happily.

"Thank you, Jen. You look beautiful,” there was an intense sparkle in the brown eyes that made Jen stop breathing for a few seconds, as she got lost in the sea of chocolate eyes.

"Everyone, please!” the director said, finally taking Jen out of her bubble as she looked away from those eyes. “Come back to your marks!”

"Thank you for the sword, Marcus,” Jen gave it to him and went to her mark, still with a smile on her face.

_Well_ … She did get a picture taken by Lana, after all, huh?

All of what had happened today was totally unexpected to Jen. From the hug to the pictures. Jennifer didn't know exactly how to deal with an unpredictable person. She hated it, actually. Jennifer liked to be in control, to know what people were thinking and find out what they wanted. But apparently, that wasn't possible with her co-star.

_Why Jen had to have feelings for someone who was married?_

* * *

 

&

Jen arrived at her trailer and jumped on the couch, resting her sore body on the comfy surface. It had been a long day of rehearsing and filming; also getting constantly surprised by her unpredictable co-star, which made her start thinking thoroughly about the previous years of filming Once Upon A Time.

Jennifer remembered season five, and how disappointed she had been when she noticed that the Dark Swan's potential was being thrown away. She had prepared herself so much for the dark side of Emma Swan. She had given hours and hours of her sleep to dedicate herself to researches. She was so excited about season five being about Emma Swan becoming dark. It was a big challenge for her, to portrait an evil character.

In 2015, at San Diego Comic Con, she was just smiles. She felt her heart in deep happiness knowing that she would have to explore the insides of her soul to play an evil character. However, nothing was like she expected.

Seeing her strong, fearless, independent character being thrown away for a stupid man had been one of her deepest _disappointments_. Emma Swan wasn't the same anymore. Jennifer knew that many of her fans mirrored themselves in Emma since the beginning of the show. Nowadays, she was afraid of entering Twitter and reading their opinion. She wouldn't be able to handle such bad words about the character she loved most; about the disappointment of whom, Emma Swan became over the years.

Jen really liked CaptainSwan in the beginning. She felt like Emma was still in control, letting her walls down slowly, but never opening too much. Not to a man like that, at least. It was a cool relationship. However, everything changed throughout the seasons. Emma became a submissive woman, most of the times putting her boyfriend’s needs and happiness before her own. The character completely forgot who she really was and became a monotonous woman lead by an abusive man. Abusive? Yes. Jennifer also thought that Hook was emotionally abusing Emma Swan. CaptainSwan wasn't a healthy relationship anymore. It never was, actually. She just hadn't noticed before. And she wasn't the only one thinks that way. Colin also thought the same, despite the fact that he was the abusive character in the story.

Being an actress is not easy. You have to change your life constantly, travel to many places in a short amount of time; you have to research a lot, change your hair's colour, live the character with your soul if you want to do good. You also can choose if you want to accept the invitation to a movie or a show. What you _can't_ really do most of the time is choose the path of your character. The writers own that job. You just play what they want. That doesn't mean you don't have the power to choose. But the choices you make could cause big _damage_. You don't own the TV show. You're a _piece_ of it. Even if it’s a very important one, you’re still _not_ the boss.

Thus, that's why Jennifer decided to also become a _director_. And it was the second best choice she's ever made. Jennifer liked to be in control and being able to at least direct something and give her own ideas became _priceless_ to her. That helped her to move on from the disappointment(s) OUAT had given her. It felt like a break from all the abusive drama she had to work with.

Yet, things like that don't dissipate from your memory as fast as you want it to. Jennifer still felt _very_ disappointed about how things worked out on season five. Dark Swan was a strategy that had been wasted so quickly that she could barely enjoy it.

Now, they had started filming a new season. Did Jen feel hopeful that OUAT would get better? Yes, she did. Jennifer had always thought about SwanQueen. _Always_. Her infatuation for her co-star has existed for a long time, but she never really admitted it to herself. She couldn't. It was dangerous back then, and it still is.

Emma and Regina's chemistry was another thing that always existed. If you had _eyes_ , you could definitely _see_ it. Mostly everyone noticed since the beginning, and that was a fact. And it happened involuntarily. Of course, Adam and Eddy explained how they wanted the characters to be, but the sexual tension was there, sort of created by Jen and Lana. Well, she can't devalue the writers like this. The writers created the show, they were who created all the _tiny_ _little_ _things;_ the main facts that made the story progress and please the audience. But then, it was themselves who _destroyed_ it. Even so, they still had something very powerful saved in case something went wrong. They had the most amazing relationship built _at all times_. They had SwanQueen. A relationship that was created between parallels; to bring love and hope back; to show that friendship is as precious as love; to show the importance of saving someone you care _deeply_ about; to enhance the fact that good can come from broken and that enemies can become _friends_ , or even more than that.

Lana Parrilla was right about being excited over a relationship like SwanQueen. Lana knew about the importance these women together could bring to the audience. She knew how much the fans craved for some representation on the show, and how this would change people’s minds and _their_ lives forever.

Most of the OUAT fans might not think Jennifer cares too much about SwanQueen, but the fact is that she does… and a _lot_. She had just been forbidden from _saying_ and _demonstrating_ what she actually wanted. She had no idea how Lana had the courage to talk about SwanQueen at the Comic Cons since both of them weren't allowed to do it.

Jennifer always said that she would be committed to her fans. She _is_ committed, actually. But what's the purpose of being with your fans and not being able to be who you truly are; or to express your opinions? She had to _pretend_ and _lie_ to her most loved ones, even though it hurt everyone in the process. She had to show them she didn't even care about SwanQueen. And that hurt. It _hurts_ not being able to be who you want to be.

Jen used to remember the previous years, and how things were easier. She used to spend more time with Lana, being friends with no barriers between them. And they were also able to show that to the fans. All the interactions they had on Twitter, everything was so fun and _real_.

She remembered the time they went to the woods to take the SwanQueen selfie with their Valentino sweaters on. She laughed so hard that day and felt so delighted when they posted the photos on Twitter. She felt completely _thrilled_ about the love and kindness they got from the fans. She felt like doing that again so many times, but suddenly… she had been _forbidden_.

Jennifer was so used to accepting what she had to do; she felt monotonous most of the times, not being the true character she could once be. Jen, Lana, and the fans waited a long time for SwanQueen to happen. And now that it was finally going to happen, Jennifer Morrison couldn't be happier. Finally something would make sense in the show again. Finally, _true love_ was going to look really _true_ and not abusive. Just like Emma's parents, Snow and Charming; the real true love couple since the beginning.

SwanQueen being canon was like a rain of hope falling over their heads and minds. SwanQueen was the reason and motive that would save everything from now on. SwanQueen made Jennifer realize who she really was, and who she never could stop being.

Jennifer was finally free.

Well, thinking about all of this had resulted in an annoying migraine Jen didn't expect for.

The buzz of her phone perturbed her mind once again. With no interest, she reached the phone to see who it was.

Oh, it was Lana. The woman who always messed up with her feelings and head, even though she didn’t know what she was causing.

**_Lana: Hey, you’re still on set?_ **

**_Jen: Yes, why?_ **

**_Lana: I need to talk to you._ **

Oh shit. Had Jen done something wrong? Had something gone wrong with SwanQueen? No, please. No!

**_Jen: What’s wrong? Did something happen?_ **

**_Lana: No, no. Nothing bad happened. Sorry, it's my fault. Everyone who says, "I need to talk to you" kind of scares the person. Sorry, Jen._ **

**_Jen: It's okay, lol. What is it, then?_ **

**_Lana: I just want to see you. If that's okay, of course._ **

Lana wanted to see her? That was her reason? Oh, my dear God.

**_Jen: It’s okay. I know we didn't have a proper time to talk this week._ **

**_Lana: Yeah, that’s why I want to see you._ **

This woman was going to kill her one day, seriously. 

**_Jen: I'm in my trailer. Want to come over?_ **

**_Lana: I'm coming._ **

Jen quickly got up and started cleaning her trailer. Her migraine was bothering her slightly but she didn't care anymore. Lana was coming over and that's what mattered now.

She heard a knock on the door and felt her heart about to jump out of her chest. _Ugh, calm down, stupid heart._ And this damn butterflies in the fucking stomach should not _exist!_

She fixed her hair and opened the door, smiling at the beautiful brunette.

"Hi, Lana!" she stayed beside the door for Lana to enter, which the brunette did hurriedly.

“Hi," Lana grinned. "Uh, it's cold outside," Lana rubbed her own arms trying to get warm. Jen immediately felt like embracing her and protecting her from the cold and everything bad in the world.

_Shit, Jennifer,_ she thought to herself. _You really want to do this right now, so go and do it. Hug her. You're friends. Hug her._

Jen approached Lana with careful steps and an awkward smile on her face. When she was ready to put her arms around the brunette, she paralyzed.

After a few seconds, cold arms wrapped around herself and Jen realized Lana had beaten her to it. She hugged her instead.

"Hmm, you're so warm, Jen," the brunette’s arms were around the blonde's waist as her head rested on Jen's chest. The latter didn't wait for a second to hug her co-star back and warm her with her arms.

"I guess I should say… uh, _thank you?_ " Lana giggled against Jen's chest which brought goosebumps to her whole body.

"I think _I_ should say thank you. You warmed me up," she pulled back from Jen's arms and gazed at her intently. Jen almost lost her breath. "Did you have dinner yet?"

"No. I got here a few minutes ago."

"Oh, good. I brought something for us," Lana opened her paper bag and pulled a plate wrapped in plastic. "Do you like Caesar Salad?"

"Yeah, I love it."

"Good. Do you mind sharing it with me?" 

“No, not at all,” Lana smiled and handed the salad to the blonde. "Seriously, thank you, Lana. That's really nice of you," the brunette grinned and walked towards the kitchen, with Jen following behind her.

"No problem, dear. Where are the forks?"

"I'll get it for us. You can sit down," she pointed to the stool close to the island. "Want something to drink?"

"Water is fine, thank you."

Jennifer poured two glasses of water with ice and put on the island. She did the same with the forks. Then, she sat on the stool and started sharing the Caesar Salad with her co-star.

Lost in thoughts, Jen realized she never imagined having dinner with Lana, just the two of them. And she didn't even have to ask for one. Lana seemed to be really missing Jennifer. It was her idea and... she has a husband, hasn’t she? Well, she may just need a friend right now. That's what you are, Jennifer. A _friend._

“Do you remember about the SwanQueen episode we filmed on Monday?" Jen nodded, her mind travelling back to the day she first kissed Lana. "They didn’t say an exact date of when is going to be aired, so I figured we could watch another episode together.”

"Uh, okay. What's the next episode?"

"It's a SwanQueen one. I'll Be Your Mirror is the title, remember?"

That episode was filmed a few weeks before they knew about SwanQueen.

"I do."

"So… if it's a SwanQueen episode, we still can watch it together, right?"

The brunette clearly wanted to spend more time with Jennifer. And that made her immensely happy.

"Sure," she said without any doubt in her voice.

"Do you really want to?"

“Yeah," Jen replied quickly. "We can see the fans' reactions before SwanQueen is canon and then after. It'll be good for us."

"Yeah, it definitely will,” Lana grinned, showing her perfect white teeth. "So, my house at 7 pm?"

"Uh… I…”

"What?"

"I think I'll feel more comfortable in my house,” Jen smiled a little awkwardly, avoiding Lana’s eyes.

The brunette reached Jen's hand and squeezed slightly. "Why would you feel uncomfortable in my house, Jen?" she asked in a concerned tone.

"I-I… that's because I… you know, I'm not used to this. It's been a long time.”

“Yes, but that's okay, don't worry. We can go to your house if you prefer, it’s not a problem,” she let go of Jen's hand and focused on her salad.

They finished eating in a comfortable silence, even though Jen was sure that Lana could hear her beating heart.

"Uh, it's late. I should go, now,” Lana commented, standing up.

"Yeah, me too."

They put the empty paper bag in the trash and soon were in the parking lot, walking towards their respective cars.

"I'll see you on Sunday," Lana smiled tenderly and kissed Jen's cheek, waving goodbye next.

"See you, Parrilla."

Jen's mind started thinking and re-thinking about her _damn_ feelings and about the night she would spend with Lana alone in her house. There were butterflies in her stomach again and she realized she couldn't control how excited she was for the next Sunday to come. Oh my God, how would that work out?


	5. A Little Bit Drunk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another update! Thank you for your support! I hope you enjoy this crazy story I created ;)

**CHAPTER FIVE**

**A Little Bit Drunk**

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

You know that quote that people always say to themselves to keep moving on? Life is tough but you must be tougher. Well, there are a lot of quotes that people like to use. Jen, specifically, liked this one. It made her stronger — literally — and right now, she was needing it a _lot_. Life was playing with her and, sometimes, she would lose herself in the process. But today, Jennifer was extremely afraid of losing it, especially because her co-star was coming over to her house.

Her feelings were disturbing her like crazy, and she could barely handle her anxiety. Jen had no idea how this friendly night with Lana was going to be. If she was barely holding herself right now, imagine later… _Shit._

Five in the afternoon, Jen started cleaning her apartment to look at least _presentable_ for Lana. She adjusted the living room properly so they could sit on the couch and be comfortable. She went to the kitchen to see if there was popcorn in the cupboards and felt pleased when she also found a bottle of Jack Daniels whiskey. Well, this would probably save the day for Jennifer Morrison. 

When Jen finished her shower, she saw a text message from Lana saying that she was bringing wine with her. Jen immediately remembered the strong whiskey she had in her cupboards. She would totally drink both, just to _take care_ of her feelings. 

Jennifer really needed to control herself at most. She couldn't let Lana notice anything. She just had to be… _normal_. They’re just friends spending a night together to watch an episode of their own show. How bad could it be?

Thirty past six and the brunette had already sent a text message saying she was on her way. Twenty minutes later, Jennifer heard the bell. _Okay, it's now. Lana is here. They are going to watch the episode just like friends do. Everything is going to be okay because it has to be._

She walked to the door and opened it, looking at a grinning Lana who was wearing black jeans, and the SwanQueen sweater. She looked like a SQ fan. _God_ , Jen was so _screwed_.

“Oh wow, you look like a goddess even in your home,” Jen looked at her own outfit as if not understanding the _goddess_ Lana wanted to imply. She was so simple, wearing comfy jeans and a white blouse with long sleeves.

“And you look like one of our craziest SwanQueen fans,” Jen teased back, causing Lana to laugh out loud while she entered the apartment. 

“Thank you,” the brunette answered and Jen giggled amusedly at her. “Our crazy fans are very proud of me right now even though they don't know I'm wearing it.”

“I bet they are,” she returned with a smirk.

“Maybe after today’s episode, they will be even more hopeful, huh?”

“That's the idea,” Jen crossed her arms over her chest and observed Lana. She was even more beautiful without makeup. “So, do you want popcorn to watch with the episode?”

“Sure, I'd love it.”

“Okay. Have to make it,” she pointed towards the kitchen.

“I'll help you,” Lana followed Jen to the kitchen. When they arrived, she spoke again, “Actually, I think you should change to your SwanQueen sweater as well. We can be _twinsies_ again,” Jen watched as Lana gave her a toothy grin, showing her excitement. It truly made her heart melt. 

“Good idea. Will you make the popcorn, then?”

“Yes, dear, don’t worry,” the brunette flashed a bright smile at her and Jen went to her bedroom to change, feeling her heart racing inside her chest.

Jen stared at herself in front of the mirror and silently praised herself: _Good, Jennifer. Everything is working well so far. You're doing good. Just remember that she is your friend and only that._

When Jen came back to the kitchen, the smell of popcorn was already all spread throughout the house. She opened the wine Lana had brought and poured two glasses for them. The episode was going to start in thirty minutes and they were almost ready to sit down and wait for it to begin. 

“Do you prefer salt or sweet popcorn?” Lana asked making Jen look at her.

“Salt. But you can choose. I don’t mind.”

Lana smiled. “I prefer salt, too.”

After the popcorn was finally ready, they went to the living room and sat on the couch, the bowl of popcorn between them. It was a little dark in there; only two yellow lamps on each side of the couch and the TV screen shining in front of them. 

Jen suddenly started feeling anxious again. Her stomach received signs of butterflies flying inside it and she _hated_ that feeling. Lana was so close to her... their shoulders were only a few inches apart because of the bowl of popcorn between them. Jennifer wanted to stay away at the same time she wanted to stay close. Her thoughts confused her so much sometimes.

“How long until the episode starts?” the brunette asked.

“Fifteen minutes.”

“Ugh, too long,” Lana complained and Jen just shrugged, eating some popcorn and sipping at her wine. 

Drinking could help her to control, right? Well, at least she _hoped_ so.

“Hey, we can take a selfie!” Lana said excitedly. “Just like we did in 2014!” Jen stared at her, not knowing exactly what to say. Well, they were wearing their sweaters, right? What was the problem with taking pictures?

“But we can't post it today,” Jen said quietly, watching as the brunette bit her bottom lip pensively. _God, she’s sexy even when she doesn't want to be._

“I know, but… maybe they will allow us to post it later after SwanQueen is declared canon on the show,” Jen nodded at that. “Unless you don’t want to take the picture?” the blonde quickly shook her head negatively. She would love to take another photo with Lana, especially now that they had their SwanQueen sweaters on. 

“Of course I do,” she smiled, loving the way Lana’s eyes shined with happiness at her response.

Lana picked her cellphone from her pocket and put the bowl of popcorn on the other side of the couch so she could lean in closer to Jen; their shoulders now touching. 

“Smile,” Jen smiled and a set of pictures were taken. “It looks great,” Lana said as she analyzed the photos. When she turned her eyes back to Jen, the blonde felt herself melt by the intensity of the look and the bright smile.

“It does. Can you send it to me?”

“Sure,” the brunette typed on her phone and soon Jen’s beeped with the arrival of the photos. “I wish we could live tweet today,” Lana commented as she scrolled over on her timeline on Twitter.

“I don’t live tweet for a really long time,” Jen added sadly.

“I know. Why did you stop?” their shoulders were still touching, and Jen was finding it hard to concentrate with Lana’s warmth so close to her. Her scent was deliciously intoxicating. Jennifer would smell her fragrance forever… _if she could._

“Uh, because I was asked questions that I couldn't answer most of the times,” that was not all, but Lana didn't have to know that.

Brown eyes narrowed at her. “Are you sure it’s just that?” 

Jen's eyes widened at that, realizing how easily Lana could read her. “It’s… well…” she stammered, not knowing exactly how to explain it.

But Lana beat her to it. “Is it because of the SwanQueen fans?” 

“Uh, yeah… kind of,” the blonde smiled nervously at her curious co-star.

“I know how hard can it be,” the brunette started. “I’m not _live tweeting_ too often either. The Swens ask questions that we can’t answer in any way, so I just avoid doing it,” Lana gave some pause while Jen observed her with attention. “It’s too complicated,” the blonde nodded. “I used to like it more, you know, at the beginning of the show. The questions were amazing! Emma and Regina _everywhere,_ but then, we had _partners_. The ship war started and it got _exhausting_.”

It felt good to know that they thought the same about the show. Jennifer didn't feel so bad anymore about what she had been doing to her fans. Or _lack_ of it, thereof. 

“Yes, exhausting is a compliment to the situation,” Jen added quietly. “It was easier to just… step away from all the critics and ship wars.” 

“Indeed. It just got impossibly harder to please anyone in the fandom.”

“I know. Too many different people wanting different happy endings,” Jen chuckled humourlessly. 

“Yes, but now,” Jen froze when Lana reached to grab her hand and intertwined their fingers together. “Most things are going to change for the better, I believe,” she squeezed Jen’s fingers reassuringly, smiling fondly at her.

“I hope so,” Jen replied almost out of breath, trying to smile back as she felt her heart racing like crazy when she realized they were still very close. Having Lana’s warm hand intertwined with hers wasn't doing good to her poor mind and feelings. Especially when Lana started to caress her fingers gently, not looking at her anymore, but looking at her Twitter account as if nothing was happening. As if it was normal for them to be _handholding_ …

Jennifer didn't move a muscle to get her hand away from Lana’s, though. The feeling was so good; she would never let go if it was possible.

“Get your cellphone. Let’s see how excited they are before the episode starts,” the brunette suggested. 

Jen did what she was asked and — sadly — had to let go of Lana’s hand. She opened Twitter and scrolled over her mentions. Nothing _crazy_ so far. She glanced at Lana and saw the brunette grinning at her phone screen.

“Well, they are pretty excited. The Swens, I mean.”

_The Swens_. That sounded interesting, huh? It was a great name in Jen’s opinion.

“I bet that CaptainSwan fans aren’t going to watch the episode tonight,” the blonde commented. 

Lana turned to look at her. “Because it’s a SwanQueen episode?” Jen nodded. “Ugh,” she huffed. “We barely have scenes together and they still complain. Oh boy, so _complicated,_ ” the brunette sighed.

“OnceABC just tweeted. It’s going to start,” Jen let go of her cellphone and looked at the TV expectantly.

_Previously on Once Upon A Time…_

They watched in silence until the first SQ scene appeared. Lana grinned at Jen, who smiled nervously. Lana was still scrolling over on Twitter, reading the tweets on her timeline and often clicked on a _Swen_ account.

“Here, look at what they’re saying,” Jen leaned in closer to look at the cellphone. Her eyes widened when she read the tweets:

**OMG, SWANQUEEN!**

**I’M DYING**

**SHIT THEY’RE SO CLOSE**

**JUST KISS ALREADY!!!**

**WIFEYS**

“It’s incredible, isn't it?” Lana asked with a smirk.

“They freak out with barely _anything_ of content,” Jen commented, feeling a bit surprised by all of this. Imagine when SwanQueen is declared canon… _Oh, God._

“I know. They get happy with little things, while others only complain about _everything_ ,” Lana said grumpily.

“Totally agreed.”

The other scene that made Lana laugh out loud was the one Regina _aka_ the Evil Queen throws Hook away with her magic.

“Oh my God, Jen! You have to see this!” Lana said laughing while she showed the tweets to the blonde.

**YAAAAAS! I’M PROUD OF YOU, QUEEN!**

**Oh God, I can’t believe she just did that! It was so funny!**

**The Evil Queen is a SwanQueen shipper! I knew it!**

**THE EVIL QUEEN REPRESENTING ALL THE SWENS HAHAHAHA**

“They clearly hate Hook,” Jen chuckled.

“Who doesn’t, anyway?”

“Good point.”

Soon, the second commercial started. Jennifer couldn't help but smile at Lana’s laugh when she read the Swen’s tweets. The blonde was taking a look at her own timeline too, but it wasn't so funny as Lana’s. They were still very close, so Jen wasn't thinking _properly_. She needed more drinks, actually. Or something stronger than wine.

“Do you want another glass of wine?” Jen asked.

“Yes, please,” Jen stood up and grabbed the two empty glasses and the bowl of popcorn, which they had already finished. She walked to the kitchen, poured another glass of wine to Lana and whiskey to herself. 

When she came back to the living room, the brunette stared with curiosity at the glass of whiskey in Jen's hand. 

“Is that whiskey?” she asked.

“Uh, yes.”

“Oh, so you needed something _stronger_ than wine. You should have told me.”

“Oh, it's fine. Do you still want your wine? I can get some whiskey for you if you want.”

“I can't have whiskey,” the brunette smirked. “I get drunk really fast,” Jen grinned, having in her mind an image of Lana getting drunk.

“It must be really funny.”

“Oh my God, don't think about me getting drunk,” Lana said with embarrassment. “It’s not a good sight,” Jen laughed out loud this time and sat on the couch again as the commercial was over.

The next SwanQueen scene was the one that Emma and Regina were about to fight the dragon, and before it, they were talking between the pillar.

“I loved this scene,” Lana commented, causing Jen to look at her. “You can see how much they care about each other.”

“Yeah, their friendship is amazing,” she said, flashing a grin to the brunette.

The next and last SwanQueen scene that caused a _murmur_ on twitter was the one Emma and Regina came back from the mirror and were laying on the floor very closely. 

“Can you believe they already made a manip of us in _bed_ with this scene?” Lana asked amid laughter, meanwhile, Jen’s heart was racing inside her chest, overwhelmed by what Lana had just said. 

Her mind wondered to an alternative reality where she would wake up every day with Lana beside her… _God, this woman would be her ruin._

“Look at this,” the brunette showed the manip to Jen which made her open her mouth. 

“Wow, they’re so talented,” she said, suddenly feeling hypnotized by the manip of them in bed made by their fans.

“They are,” the brunette said with a smile, while she looked intently into Jen’s green eyes.

She turned away sheepishly and watched as the credits appeared on TV. The episode was over and Jen was very impressed by the tweets of the Swens she had read. It had been good to read their opinion while watching the show. It felt good to know that they appreciated the episode, even though nothing romantically related happened to Emma and Regina. 

“That was a great episode. I feel fulfilled,” the brunette said.

“Me too. The fans seem happy.”

“Yeah. At least the bigger part of the fandom is going to be really happy about Emma and Regina being together,” Lana added with a small smile. 

“Yeah, they are,” the blonde smiled back and stood up. “I’m going to get more whiskey.”

It had been good to see the other side of the fandom. Jen usually received a lot of hurtful comments from the CaptainSwan fans, especially when the episodes were SwanQueen centred, which _rarely_ happened. They had appeared on her timeline today, but she didn't tell Lana, not wanting to ruin her excited mood. That’s why she just avoided Twitter most of the times. It’s an impossible mission to please all of the fandoms. That’s just how TV shows are.

With a sigh, she opened the cupboard and grabbed the bottle of whiskey. Now that the episode was over, Jen didn't know what to do _at all._ Lana didn't seem to want to go home and, well, she didn't _want_ Lana to go home… But Jen didn't know what they could do from now on. Sighing once more, she drank a large gulp of her whisky right from the bottle. Speaking of which, they have been drinking a _lot_ since the episode started. Jen could already feel her veins full of alcohol, but it somehow made her feel braver instead of her usual shy self. Smiling with confidence, she grabbed the bottle of whiskey and wine and took it with her to the living room. She handed the wine to Lana and kept the whiskey to herself. Now they could finish up both of their bottles.

“Do you want something to eat?” Jen asked as she sat on the couch, closely beside Lana.

“No, I'm fine,” the brunette smiled with gratitude.

Jen shrugged and decided to take another gulp of her whiskey. Lana followed her gesture, and drank her own bottle of wine. When their eyes found each other again, Jen could see how bright the brown eyes were, probably just as drunk as Jennifer herself.

“I have cheese. I know you like cheese,” Jen added with a smirk, winning another from her companion. 

“Hmm, I can never say no to cheese.”

Jen chuckled. “Well then, I’ll go cut some.”

“I’ll join you,” the brunette said as she stood up to walk with Jen to the kitchen; their alcoholic bottles in hand.

“Cheddar?”

“Absolutely,” the blonde picked the cheese from the fridge and the wooden cut board. 

“What can I do to help?” the brunette asked while leaning against the counter, as she observed Jennifer cutting the cheese. 

“You can sit and relax,” Jen pointed to the stool over at the island and Lana just smirked at her, walking over to the island.

When Jen finished cutting the cheese, she joined Lana on the island. They started eating in silence, both just glancing at each other amid smiles. 

“Do you work tomorrow?” Lana asked as she took the last gulp of her wine bottle. _Damn._ That’s a whole fucking lot and she drank it all almost by herself.

“No, it’s my day off.”

“Mine, too.”

“Well, good, because we’re both drinking and I think we wouldn't be able to work well tomorrow,” Jen adde with a dry chuckle.

“Exactly,” the brunette agreed after eating the last piece of cheese. “Should we go back to the living room?”

“Sure,” they both stood up from the stool at the same time, but Lana, however, seemed a little bit weak on the knees and almost fell, causing Jen to act quickly and pull the brunette by the arm. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Lana let out a sigh of relief. “Just a little bit dizzy from the alcohol.”

Jen smiled nervously in response, noting that she was also a little bit dizzy from the alcohol. But something suddenly made everything even _dizzier_ : Lana leaned in and circled her arms around Jen’s neck, bringing their body flush together. Their faces now were only a few inches away and Jennifer found out she could barely breathe and control the beats of her crazy heart.

“Thank you for having me here tonight, Jen,” the brunette drawled as she angled her head and rested it on the crook of Jen’s neck, bringing goosebumps all over the blonde's body.

Well, it appeared that this marvellous night had come to an end and this was their final embrace. The blonde suddenly felt sad about it, because she didn't want Lana to go. She wanted her there, embracing her like this every day.

“You smell whiskey,” came the raspy voice in her ear. More goosebumps appeared on her skin and she tried to act normal and just say anything that would come out of her mouth.

“And you smell wine.”

Lana started pulling away, and Jen realized that this was _it._ The night was over and her co-star would go home to wait for her husband. But instead, the brunette leaned away only a few inches apart from her and asked, “Can I taste it?”

Jen quickly asked with curiosity, “Taste what?”

“The whiskey.”

Oh, right. Jen’s perverted mind didn't think of whiskey as something to _taste it._ She just assumed Lana had meant something else…

“Uh, yeah, of course,” the blonde grabbed the bottle and handed it to Lana. 

“How much can you drink in one sip?” the brunette asked as Jen wondered why she was asking her this. Did she want Jen to get drunk?

“I’m a bit drunk already.”

“Don't you wanna get more?” Lana drawled and you could see mirth in her eyes. And also _desire._ Shit, Jennifer couldn't possibly be seeing things clearly. 

Sending her perverted thoughts away, she answered, “Okay, but you have to drink it too.” 

Lana nodded in response and drank a small gulp of the whiskey, her mischievous smile becoming a grimace right after she finished drinking it. “Oh God, that’s so strong!” she handed the bottle back to Jen.

“Can’t say that I agree,” the blonde drank another big gulp, instantly feeling the burning alcohol enter her system.

“It’s not strong to you?” her co-star asked, sounding surprised by the big gulp Jen had just drunk.

“Not at all,” Jen smirked, feeling victorious. “You’re weak, Parrilla. I really thought you were stronger for alcohol,” the blonde teased, gazing at the brunette intently to see her reactions.

Lana’s eyes changed emotions very quickly when she heard that. Jen could notice the Evil Queen look dominating the brunette’s face. _Oops._

“Don’t make me give you an apple turnover, Miss Swan,” she used that sexy, threatening Evil Queen voice causing Jen’s body to shiver completely. 

“Is that so, Your Majesty?” Jen got into character and teased the brunette.

“I’m not _weak_ ,” Lana said with a glare, her arms now crossed over her chest.

When Jen got into character, she felt way safer with her attitudes than when she was being herself. Now that she knew they were playing with their characters, she could tease her co-star endlessly. “Prove me wrong, then.”

“Why don’t you shut up, Miss Swan?” Lana saying _Miss Swan_ always drove her crazy, especially now that she had been drinking and that raspy, commanding voice sent a hint of arousal direct to her core.

“Make me,” Jen’s breath was caught in her throat when her lips were captured and immediately caressed by a tongue requesting entrance which Jennifer readily granted, resisting the moan begging for release as the tongue slid into her mouth and tangled with her own. _Fuck_. _Lana was kissing her! Fucking kissing her!_

All the control Jennifer had was gone. The only thing she could focus on was the way Lana kissed her and the taste of her mouth. Wine mixed with whiskey and cheese… _God, so good._

When it became hard to breathe, Lana pulled away barely one inch and let her mouth stay glued to Jen’s as they breathed in unison. 

“What are we doing?” Jen was brave enough to ask, her voice sounding hoarse as ever, feeling pretty aroused by the sudden kiss.

“We're rehearsing,” and another heady kiss started, making Jen think that this was a dream. _God, it looked like a dream. In what reality she would have imagined her co-star kissing her with such passion, as if nothing would ever stop them from doing that? None._

She had to hold back a moan when Lana’s hand grasped her cheek, angling her head so she could deepen the kiss. Her co-star clearly wanted to be in control, which Jen was loving every second of it, but she also liked to dominate. With slight force, she pushed the brunette towards the wall and pressed her own body flush against the other woman’s. Both of them released a gasp by the contact, but quickly continued with the kiss. Lana’s tongue was working mischievously inside Jen's mouth, exploring every corner. A moan was released from her mouth as teeth nibbled on her bottom lip, and then her jawline. _Fuck._

An abrupt stop and Jen found herself breathing hard, still pressed against Lana Parrilla on the wall of her kitchen. 

“Shit. My head is spinning,” the brunette said as she rested her head on the wall.

Jen chuckled nervously, walking away from the hot body pressed firmly against hers to grab the bottle of whiskey on the counter and drink another big sip of the good liquid.

“How can you be so normal after all the whiskey you’ve had?” Lana asked behind her, and Jen felt her itch for another make out session with the gorgeous brunette.

“I guess I’m strong,” Jen showed off her muscles which caused a big smug grin to appear on Lana’s face. 

But the grin suddenly faded away and the brunette said with slight sadness, “Well, I think I should go now.”

Jen was quick to protest, “No way you’re driving like this. You have drunk too much, so you’re staying here.”

Lana looked at her intently. Jen’s stomach started flipping and her heart was about to jump out of her chest. Jennifer had no idea of what the brunette would say. They had just kissed, for God’s sake! Maybe staying here wasn't a good idea…

“Oh Jen, you’re so protective,” Lana said fondly, surprising the blonde once more when she hugged her tightly, causing Jen to gasp when she felt Lana’s heat against her body again.

“Uh, I try,” she replied shyly, still wrapped in the woman’s embrace. “Should we go to bed?”

_Fuck. They would sleep on the same bed. How bad could that be, huh?_

“Yes, please. I’m really tired.”

They went to Jen’s bedroom, and then to the suite where Jen gave Lana a toothbrush. The blonde brushed her teeth as she observed her co-star do the same with her eyes almost closing as she tried to reach forces to brush her own teeth. Well, Lana really couldn't drink _at all_. She really got too drunk very quickly, especially when whiskey was involved.

Jen was drunk as well, but not like Lana. But she knew that she would be dying in the morning with the worst hangover.

“Ready?” Jen asked when she finished. 

Lana nodded and threw herself in Jen’s arms once again, a smug smile on her beautiful face.

“Oh Lana, you’re not so refined like Regina right now,” that made the brunette laugh out loud and kiss Jen’s cheek gently. 

“You’re funny, Jen. But now, take me to bed or I might pass out in your strong arms.”

Smiling with the compliment, she just answered, “Okay,” and started carrying Lana towards the bed. When they were both laid on the soft mattress, Jen turned off the lights and put the blankets on top of them.

Lana didn't move an inch apart from her. She was so close that Jen could feel her minty breath on her face. It felt so good, though. She knew it wasn't right to have Lana sleeping so close to her like this, but she didn't want it to _end_. She wanted Lana close to her all the _fucking_ time. Her mind was perturbing her about how wrong this was. But Jen just decided not to think too much right now and just enjoy the moment. When would she have that again, huh?

“Jen, your lips are so soft,” the blonde widened her eyes when she felt slender fingers touching her lips slowly.

“Yours too,” she murmured back, while caressing the brunette’s plump lips. The best she had ever kissed. “But now you have to sleep, Lana,” Jen felt a sweet kiss on her lips and then, she watched as Lana’s breathing became calm, and she fell asleep.


	6. Hopeful

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi again! It's still Thursday in my country, but I'm posting now because I won't have time tomorrow.  
> Thank you for the comments and kudos!  
> Enjoy the journey! xoxo

**CHAPTER SIX**

**Hopeful**

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

Jennifer woke up with the light of the sun invading the room. She closed her eyes quickly, trying to avoid the pain that the clarity was bringing to her head. _Shit, the damn hangover!_ Jen always regretted drinking on the next day. She knew she shouldn't, but sometimes, she just couldn't avoid the joyfulness of being drunk. _Thank God she didn’t have to work today…_

Slowly, her mind was bringing the memories from last night… Why had she drunk so much? 

Oh, my God! _Lana Parrilla!_

Her co-star had slept in her house because she was even _drunker_ than Jen. And they kissed. Fuck, they practically made out against the wall of her kitchen! But Lana had started the kiss; Jen had controlled herself until those sinful lips met hers and she got a new taste of what is kissing Lana Parrilla… Well, shit. But Lana said they were _rehearsing._ Her co-star was definitely drunk last night, but so was Jen. So if Lana said they were rehearsing, who is she to disagree? They were just _working…_ right? What happened next? Where did Lana sleep? 

**“Take me to bed or I might pass out in your strong arms.”**

Oh, shit! Lana slept in her bed, right beside her. _Fuck._

Jennifer opened her eyes immediately, not bothering anymore about the light coming from the windows, and viewed the brunette in her bed. No only in her bed, but _on top of her_. Lana was sleeping completely clung to Jen’s body; her head was resting on one of the blonde’s boobs; her right leg in the middle of Jen’s legs, and her arm around Jen’s waist holding her possessively. _What an unusual position for friends, huh?_ Jennifer wasn't complaining, though. She could feel her whole body warm by the contact, and goosebumps instantly appeared on her skin. _God, she felt like never letting go of her co-star again._ Her skin was so damn soft and… fuck, their bodies together made the perfect shape. 

Though, unfortunately, staying clung to her co-star all day wasn't an option.

So, what now? Should she wake up Lana? It was almost 10 am, Jen noted when she glanced at her alarm clock  on the bedside table . The blonde didn't know if Lana had plans today or if she’d rather go home soon. Once again, Jennifer found herself not wanting her co-star to leave her house. Having her here, spending a great time together and also…  fucking _making out_ was making her get attached … which she definitely _shouldn’t_. 

This had to stop. _Now_.

However, she became startled when she felt a hand moving around her waist and some stirring on top of her. In an instant, she closed her eyes quickly and didn't dare to open them again because Lana was probably waking up. And Jen didn't want to face this now. She was actually scared by what her co-star’s reaction would be.

Lana’s body stirred a bit more and her head now rested on Jen’s chest, the brunette’s face in the crook of her sensitive neck. _Shit_. More goosebumps appeared on her skin as she felt the other woman’s hot breathing in her neck. 

Another sudden movement was made and Lana put her knee between Jen's… _private parts._ Oh God, Lana. _Oh God!_ Her co-star’s hand started moving again, now from Jen’s chest to her boobs, and then to her stomach until it came back to her boobs again and stopped right there, resting on top of her _traitorous_ _erupt_ nipple. What the fuck was happening, for God’s sake? Was Lana still drunk, because Jen was technically being _groped_ by her co-star… which she didn't mind _at all._ The only issue was how to control her uneven breathing, especially when said naughty hand decided to round her breast and _caress_ her all over. Fuck, Jennifer was going to die if this woman didn't wake up soon. Lana had to be having a _very_ explicit dream about someone because there was no other explanation for what was happening right now.

The caresses continued, and as predicted, Jen’s nipples hardened like a _rock._ The only good thing besides the pleasure she was feeling was the fact that she was wearing a black sweater, which made it harder for her nipples to be seen. 

When she thought her torture would be over, the sound that Lana let out from her mouth caused Jen’s eyes to widen, and a wave of _excruciating_ arousal course through her _damned weak_ body. Lana fucking _moaned_. She fucking moaned against Jen’s neck; the sound coming throaty and damn _sexy_. The blonde immediately had to suppress a moan of her own, already trying to fight against the unwanted arousal below her stomach. 

This clearly was the last straw. Jen couldn't take it anymore, so she decided to wake up Lana. She couldn't feel those sensations. It was _wrong_. _It had to stop._

Taking a long, steady breath, Jen moved her arm from its position under her co-star, pushing the brunette to the side so she could have some space to breathe properly. Another deep breath and she gently started shaking the brunette who immediately groaned in displeasure, clinging herself once again to Jen’s body. _Shit, Lana. You’re going to kill Jennifer._

“Lana, wake up, please?” the blonde gently shook her again. “We have to get up,” another groan was heard and the brunette didn't move an _inch_. Not to mention that her malicious hand was still around Jen’s boob, the fingers pinching slightly on her hard nipple.

Deciding not to think of what that hand was still causing her, Jen instead started to study her closely as she slept. Her hair was matted and splayed about the pillow her head sunk into. Her features were much softer in sleep, the lines that usually creased her black arched eyebrow were replaced by the serenity of a good sleep; her chest rising and falling rhythmically. Her skin resembled smooth caramel that Jen longed to touch; the sharp profile of her jawline along with her slightly rounded cheeks. Her voluptuous, kissable lips were yet pale-red from last night’s crimson lipstick that Jen proudly smudged off. And she could confess that she had never seen a woman so beautiful like Lana.

With a fond smile, she reached forward and started caressing the smooth locks of dark brown hair, calling softly, “Hey Lana, it’s time to wake up.” 

As predicted, the brunette remained motionless. Jennifer then decided that she had to make difficult decisions to wake this _Sleeping Beauty_. Smiling with mirth, she disentangled herself from Lana and switched positions, now staying on top as the latter rested on her back. What she wasn't expecting though, was for Lana to pull her by the waist tightly and the unpredictable fate of falling on top of the brunette, who was surprisingly _very clingy._ A new position in place _, and hell,_ now their mouths were damn close to kiss. One easy slip and their lips would meet.

Jen put her elbows on each side of Lana’s body to try to put some distance between them. Once more, she called, “Lana, wake up, please. _Wake. Up.”_

Her co-star was clearly the most heavy-sleeper person she had ever met. Holy fucking shit. Now Jen would have to take drastic measures to wake her up. And the worst thing she could ever do to a sleeping person was to tickle them, even if they weren't ticklish. But Jen had a feeling that Lana wouldn't be able to fight against a tickle session. Without second thoughts, the blonde started tickling the brunette mercilessly, already able to hear the small giggles that were coming from Lana’s mouth. Her eyes though were still closed. Her body was moving constantly to the sides as groans of displeasure and quick giggles were sounded in the room. 

Jen couldn't hold her own laugh when she saw Lana suddenly widening her eyes as if she was being attacked by a _murderer_. In a fast movement, Jen felt her wrists being held tightly and then her arms were outstretched on top of her head, as she fell with her face directly on Lana’s boobs. _Oh, God. Would this ever end?_

She heard a loud gasp _slash_ shrieking noise and felt the fingers tighten around her wrists. “Jen,” the brunette murmured out of breath. “You almost killed me!”

The blonde couldn't suppress a laugh, even though her co-star had a very humourless expression on her face. “Oh, I’m very sorry, Miss Parrilla, but you wouldn't wake up.”

“You are definitely in trouble, Jennifer Morrison,” the brunette threatened with a hint of mischief in her eyes, and then Jen knew that she was busted.

“I tried to wake you up gently before, okay? It’s not my fault that you are a heavy sleeper,” Lana narrowed her eyes at the apology and kept glaring at the blonde.

Jennifer, by the way, felt completely exposed when those dark brown orbs locked into hers. Her co-star had that _evil_ look; the look that could kill you right away if you didn't know how to fight back.

“Now you’re going to see how gentle _I_ am,” their position suddenly changed and Jen was resting with her back on the mattress as Lana straddled her, holding her wrists above her head.

_Holy fuck. This shit only got worse!_ Lana was straddling her! _Fucking straddling!_

Another wave of pure arousal coursed through her core as she felt Lana’s ass sitting in her centre. Her stomach received the well-known butterflies when her co-star leaned in dangerously, her face now only a few inches from hers. _God, how can she control herself this way?_

“Ready to suffer, JMo?” the hoarse voice murmured close to her ear and she felt her whole body shiver in response. Lana smirked mischievously as her hands quickly let go of Jen’s wrists and reached her stomach where she started tickling the blonde mercilessly. 

Jen jumped by the contact and started laughing out loud. She was a _very_ ticklish person, so she hastily tried to reach Lana’s unbeatable hands to make her stop, but the brunette was on top of her, thus she was in complete control of Jennifer. _Fuck_. Jen didn't know if she couldn't breathe by the tickling or the friction of Lana’s ass in her centre.

“Shit! Please, Lana, stop!” she said amid laughs and panting gasps. She could hear the brunette’s laugh too, her hands still tickling Jen’s stomach. 

“Fight me, Saviour!”

And that’s exactly what Jen did. She forgot about the brunette’s hands on her stomach and pulled herself up, holding Lana’s waist and pushing her on the mattress to stay on top.

“And she fought indeed,” Lana said proudly as her arms were held above her head by Jen’s strong hands.

“I’m stronger, Parrilla,” Jen flattered herself with a smirk, knowing that her co-star wasn’t going to let it end this way.

“Don’t play with fire if you don’t want to get burned.” 

Jen quickly let go of Lana’s wrists to look at her with fright in her eyes. “Didn’t know you were in character right now.”

“Who said I was?” she asked with that freaking sexy Evil Queen voice. Jen couldn't help her mouth from gaping, and she stayed like this until she heard Lana sniggering. “Your face is priceless.”

“As always,” she said getting off of Lana’s lap. 

“Shit, I have a freaking headache right now,” Jen smirked and crossed her arms over her chest, still not completely recovered by the previous _situations_ on her bed with her co-star. “Oh please, say that you have a headache too. Tell me I’m not that weak.” 

Jen giggled. “I do, actually. A very bad one.”

“Good,” the brunette smiled and tried to get up, but Jen saw her struggling to do it so she quickly leaned closer to help the brunette. “It’s the first time in this month I have a hangover.”

“Well, me too. Feels good to be back.” 

Lana laughed but immediately touched her head which agonized pain. “It’ll all feel better if you have an aspirin to give me.”

“I sure do. Follow me.”

They both walked to the kitchen where Jen picked two aspirins in the drawer and gave one to Lana, taking the other for herself. After taking the medicine, they got into a very awkward silence, both looking at each other waiting for one to talk.

“So… Do you have plans today?” Lana asked, a little bit odd by the moment.

“Uh, not yet, I guess. Maybe just enjoying the day off watching movies or something like that. Why?”

“Well, I don't have plans either. Do you mind if I join you?” the sheepish look Lana flashed her was so damn cute, and Jen realized that she couldn't possibly say no to that, even if staying one more day with Lana would do no good to her self-control.

“Of course I don’t mind,” Jen smiled, gaining another smile from Lana. “It’s good to have someone else in my apartment other than Ava.” 

Lana chuckled happily. “Where’s Ava, by the way?”

“Oh, she’s with my sister in LA. For a _week_ ,” Jen rolled her eyes. “I only let that happen because Julia insisted.”

“I bet you’re missing her terribly.”

“I definitely am,” she responded with a small smile. 

Jen's telephone started ringing on the nightstand and she reached to grab it. It was the guy from the set who delivered the scripts.

“The new script arrived. The delivery guy is outside on my doorstep.”

“That’s great!” the brunette said excitedly.

The bell rang and Jennifer went to the door to answer it, Lana following behind her. The delivery guy gave her the envelope and she thanked him. When she turned to face Lana, the brunette had this curiosity in her eyes, probably imagining if there was any SwanQueen scene in the new script.

She started opening the envelope and realized there was also a note. “There's a note from Adam and Eddy,” she told Lana, who leaned in closer to read what was said. 

_Hello, Jennifer. Don't get confused by the script yet. We know what we’re doing and SwanQueen is endgame. Just needed to tell you that the kiss scene between the Evil Queen and Emma Swan will be postponed. We are focused on the Alternative Universe right now and how Emma and Regina are going to work in there. We also sent the script to Lana. More SwanQueen scenes are coming, so it would be even better if you and Lana were rehearsing during the day offs. You did great in the last scenes and everyone agreed that you make a great television couple. Have a good day!_

_Signed by A &E. _

When Jen looked at Lana again, she had this huge smile on her face as if what she had just read was the best thing in the world.

“That’s incredible! I’m so excited!” the brunette said and Jen found herself hypnotized once more by the beauty of that woman. “We should read the script together and rehearse like they said. What do you think?”

“I think it’s great, but first... we should eat. I'm starving.”

“Oh, that's true. I forgot that we just woke up,” she watched with an arched eyebrow as Lana started walking freely towards the kitchen as if she lived in that house. 

Jen started wondering why Lana decided to stay in her house right now, why she _wanted_ to be here. Doesn’t she have a husband to be with? Actually, does her husband know that she’s staying at Jen's house? Fuck, she had so many questions right now… But still, she wouldn't complain about having her co-star’s presence here. She was loving every minute of it. She just wondered why Lana wanted to be with her instead of her own husband. Maybe he wasn't in the city? Well, whatever. That shouldn't matter right now. Jen should only enjoy Lana's company as much as she could until she’s gone back to her husband.

Taking a deep breath, the blonde followed her co-star to the kitchen and looked at her with a fond smile. “So, what do you want for brunch?”

“ _Brunch?_ Oh, it’s already eleven. You should have woken me up earlier, Jen,” the brunette said wryly, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Nice try, Parrilla. Nice try,” they both laughed at each other. “What do you wanna eat?”

“Nothing healthy.”

“Well, you’re at the wrong place, then. My refrigerator has only space for veggies and meat. Sorry,” the blonde falsely apologized.

“I know that you’re very _healthy_ , Morrison,” Lana teased, approaching Jennifer with her arms still crossed over her chest. “And I also know that deep down,” she poked Jen’s chest while continuing. “You want to skip your diet and go down with me on this day off,” Jen saw a smug smile crossing Lana’s face as she kept herself very close to the blonde. 

_Go down with me._ Jennifer would definitely go down _on_ Lana… Shit. She had to focus!

“I know as well that you’re going to change your mind right now as I say what I want to eat, which will drive you _crazy_ ,” it was Jen’s time to cross her arms over her chest and gaze intently at Lana.

“Then tell me what you want, _Your Majesty.”_

They both grinned at the term and Lana continued to say, “I want pancakes, scrambled eggs, sausage and beans with lots of maple syrup on it, because damn, we are in Canada, aren’t we?” Jen widened her eyes at the amount of food her co-star wanted. 

“Right,” she giggled. “You’re turning into a very Canadian person, Lana,” she teased, causing the brunette to laugh even more.

“Do you want I want?” 

When Jen heard those words, her mind went crazy with the number of meanings it had. _Fuck_. Jen wanted _many_ things. She wanted to kiss Lana, to feel her in her arms as she writhed beneath her-

Fingers snapped in front of her face. “Are you still there?” Lana asked with a small smile, which made Jen blush embarrassedly at the fantasy she just had.

“Uh, yeah, but I’m afraid I don’t have these things in here.”

“I imagined. Can we go to the market?” Jen widened her eyes at the thought. 

Could they go out together, even though it was only to the market? Well, if anyone caught them, it could cause a fuss in the future, right?

“Lost in your world again?” Lana’s teasing voice dispersed her from her thoughts.

“Uh, yeah,” she replied with embarrassment. “Can we be seen together yet?”

Lana seemed to be thinking about it. “Well, I don’t know. Maybe we can’t be seen together yet,” Jen nodded in response. “But there’s still a way. Do you have a hoodie?”

* * *

 

&

“Shit, we look like _thieves!”_ Jennifer commented by taking a look in the mirror in her bedroom where she and Lana were looking for hoodies to put on and to go to the market.

“That’s the spirit,” Lana said looking in the mirror and laughing at them both. “Ready?”

Jen sighed before answering, “Sure.” 

Lana pulled her by the hand and they went to the market. When they arrived there, Lana pulled her hood down and started looking for the condiments for her banquet and gave all of it to Jen so she could hold it. When Lana finished and finally looked at Jen, she laughed out loud at the situation.

“Oh my God, Jen! You look so funny!” Lana said and Jen just rolled her eyes playfully at her, trying to hold all the condiments in her arms. 

“And you look so good with nothing in your arms,” the blonde teased with sarcasm, causing Lana to laugh once again.

“We should have gotten a cart.”

“And you tell me this _now?_ Too late, Parrilla.”

“You look cute, though. This moment deserves a picture!” Lana quickly grabbed her phone and snapped a picture of Jen who had her tongue out to Lana. “Awesome! I’m definitely going to laugh at this _forever_.” 

“So evil, Your Majesty,” Jen accused mockingly.

“Always,” Lana responded with an evil look. 

That look did no good to her insides… _Damn_.

“Can you help me, please?”

“Sure, Jen. Sorry about that, anyway,” Lana picked some ingredients from her arms and walked to the cashier with the blonde by her side.

They divided the money to pay and went back to the house. Soon, they started to cook their brunch: Lana making the pancakes and the sausages, and Jen making the beans and scrambled eggs. When they finished, Jen heard her stomach gurgling impatiently.

“Oh God, I’m getting fat just by looking at this,” she commented, hearing Lana’s laugh. “I really don’t think I should eat it.”

The brunette rolled her eyes. “I appreciate your taste in healthy food and I know it’s all worth it because look at these abs and arms,” Jen’s heart started to race as she heard those compliments. _Oh God, did she really say that?_

Jen also heard a gasp coming from Lana’s mouth when she reached to touch her arms, and then, her flat stomach. _Fuck._

“C’mon Jen, I know you want that,” Lana pointed to the food, keeping her other hand intact on Jen’s stomach, seeming to feel the texture.

“I do want a lot of things,” she said low, looking intently at the hand on her stomach. The memory of the hot body wrapped around hers this morning invaded her mind and she felt her face blushing again.

“What things?” Lana asked curiously and Jen tried _not_ to freak out. 

Jenifer should stop thinking about this naughty stuff. She would never be able to do  _any_ of them with her co-star. She had to stop!

“I, uh, I mean the food. I want everything, so let’s eat. My stomach is _screaming_.”

“Oh, I can feel it,” the brunette giggled causing Jen to do the same.

* * *

 

&

“Are you ready to read the script?” Lana asked when they went to the living room after eating their brunch.

“I’m not even sure if I can breathe,” she said sitting on the couch and putting her own hand on her stomach. “Shit, I’m so _full_.”

“Me too,” the brunette said, sitting beside Jen on the couch. “You don’t wanna read, though?”

“I do, actually. I’m curious about the alternative universe. What about you?”

“If you still want me in your house, I would be happy to read it with you.”

_Oh, if only Lana knew…_

Jen smiled shyly. “That’s totally fine, you can be here as long as you want.” 

It was Lana’s time to grin. “You’re awesome, Jen.”

“Thanks,” she gazed at the brunette and lost herself in her eyes. She was so damn attractive, _ugh_. Jen could feel her heart clenching as she thought about Lana and the times their lips have met; her hands feeling the texture of the gorgeous body; their bodies pressing against each other…

Sometimes Jen wondered how Lana could look in the mirror and not fall in love with herself. _Damn_ , she was fucking beautiful from inside and out. Her affectionate personality, the easy-going trait and the emotional way she dealt with people. She was extremely hard-working and her acting is so, so fucking good. Lana clearly deserved to be recognized, and probably receive an Oscar one day. Just everything about her made Jen swoon every time she spent time with the brunette.

Even though she didn’t know if Lana was at least attracted to her a few years ago, she should have tried something anyway, right? She was so scared thinking that Lana would reject her and decided to _don’t_ make a move. Jen had suffered from the unstoppable attraction but tried to move on. Lana as well, she had definitely moved on when she got engaged and Jennifer lost her chance.

She had lost her chance, right? Why her mind insisted on saying _no?_ How her stupid brain still hoped that she would be with Lana Parrilla? She had a husband, for fuck’s sake! That’s impossible. They can’t be together.

“Why do you keep looking at me like this?” Lana’s voice called her attention and she stopped thinking for a moment.

“Looking at you? Like what?”

“You’re so lost in thoughts. I never know what you’re thinking,” the brunette leaned in, her face studying Jen closely.

“That’s the purpose of thinking, right? No one can hear it,” the blonde teased, smiling weakly at her co-star who made her feel so good and so _bad_ at the same time. _Shit, she was so screwed._

“I wish I could read your thoughts, you know?” Lana commented.

Jen arched her eyebrows at that. “Why?”

“Because most of the time I look at you, you’re daydreaming and staring at me intently… I never know why.” 

Jennifer’s hands started sweating. _Shit_. Lana was making her nervous, like, _super-super-nervous._ Extreme curiosity was one of Lana’s traits that Jen wasn't so fond of. 

“Tell me, Jen. Please,” the brunette begged, leaning in dangerously close. The dark orbs started looking between Jen’s green eyes and lips. 

“Um, I just… uh… I just think you’re beautiful. Very, very beautiful.”

Jen saw a shy smile appear on Lana’s face. “You think so?” the brunette asked.

“Well, who doesn’t?” she asked with a shrug, wanting to look away. _This was too much for her._

“That’s all you think when you’re looking at me?” another question that made Jen’s heart race. _Shit._

Jen thought about so many things when looking at Lana. Especially how much she wanted to kiss her and do dirty things to her and-

“You just did it again,” the brunette pointed out with a smug smirk. Jen was clearly _busted_.

She flashed a shy smile at her co-star and said, “I’m a thoughtful person.” 

A few seconds of silence passed between them; both lost in each other’s eyes. Jen was starting to get worried.

“You’re very beautiful to me as well,” the brunette said, and then grasped Jen’s chin. “And very special.” 

Jen felt like she was going to die when Lana’s mouth touched the corner of her lips, pressing softly, barely touching it, but still, she could feel the delicious warmth. 

Her co-star pulled apart with a grin on her face. “Shall we read the script now?”

Jen nodded, trying to hide the blush covering her face and the huge grin she couldn't prevent from forming on her lips. A sudden sentiment started filling in her heart right now. Something like… _hope_.

Was it too late to fight for who she desired? Or… should she _try?_


	7. Crazy Ideas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi again! Sorry for the late update. Thanks for comments and kudos! I'm very grateful for you all!  
> Enjoy the small, but important, chapter!
> 
> PS: Contains spoilers of the show Once Upon A Time;  
> Lines of the show are in bold;

**CHAPTER SEVEN**

**Crazy Ideas**

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

They were sitting on the couch as Jen flipped over the pages of the script and her co-star peered over her shoulder.

“How many SwanQueen scenes do we have?” Lana asked.

“I think seven in total.”

“Wow, that’s a lot compared to previous episodes. Do they kiss?”

Jen’s eyes immediately widened at the mention of a _kiss_. _Did Lana want them to kiss?_ Probably not. She was just cheering for Emma and Regina to be together soon. Right?

With a sigh, Jen answered, “I don’t think so. But there’s a lot of dramatic chats between them, and they hold hands-”

“They hold _hands?”_ the brunette interjected with surprise.

“Uh, yeah, but not in a romantic way. It’s when the portal to come back to Storybook opens and Regina grasps Emma’s hand.”

“Oh,” Lana replied with disappointment. “I thought it was something else.”

“Well, Adam and Eddy are definitely postponing the romantic scenes with Emma and Regina.”

“I guess they are. We’ll have to wait a bit more, then.”

“Unfortunately yes,” Jen sighed. Her heart was hurting to see the disappointment in Lana’s face. Now she just felt like _obligating_ the writers to make SwanQueen canon as soon as possible so Lana could be happy. “Um, there’s something else you’re not going to like, Lana,” Jen said carefully. 

“What is it?”

“Robin comes back.”

“ _What?”_

“Yeah, he kinda interrupts their moment at the lake.”

Lana’s mouth gape at the news as she stares at the script in Jen’s hand, trying to find the _insulting_ name of a character that would make everything harder for SwanQueen to happen. _Damn it._

“I seriously adore and miss Sean, but I don’t understand why they keep _reviving_ his character. What’s left for Robin in the show? Ugh, Regina has suffered enough with him,” Lana said bitterly.

“I agree with you. Regina’s and Emma’s relationship with male characters are just the _worst.”_

Lana nodded promptly. “Yes. The only healthy relationship would be ours.”

_Ours_. The word made Jen’s heart flutter _tellingly_.

Jen started chewing nervously on her bottom lip, thinking of something she could say next. But Lana beat her to it.

“Are you sure there’s nothing romantic between Emma and Regina on this chapter?” Lana asked with an arched eyebrow.

Jen shook her head. “I’m sure. There’s nothing romantic here between you and me, uh, I mean, between Regina and _me_ \- uh, no, I mean, Emma!” 

Lana giggled at the blonde’s stammering and said, “It’s confusing, I know. I just hope they have a very good plan for SwanQueen in the future.”

“Yeah, me too. In my opinion, this Alternative Universe was the perfect opportunity for Emma and Regina to fall in love. Or at least for them to start spending more quality time together without being _interrupted_ if you know what I mean.”

Lana smiled fondly and said, “I agree. So do you want to rehearse the lines?”

“Yeah, sure. But there’s only one script.”

“That’s not a problem. We can share.”

Of course they could share. It wasn't a problem _at all._ The only problem with sharing was the fact that her co-star would be very close to her all the time. _Oh, God._

“Ready?” the blonde nodded. “What’s our first scene together?”

“It’s the one we find the Evil Queen at Robin’s grave and I try to kill her,” Jen explained.

“But if you kill her, you kill-”

“Well, not anymore, apparently. The sword only hurts the Evil Queen and not Regina.”

“Oh really? Let me see that,” Lana leaned in to read the script. “ _Emma thinks she hurt Regina and turns back with a frightened look on her face,_ ” Lana seemed to ponder about the scene for some seconds. “I like the way Adam and Eddy create the small details between them; how much they care about each other is explicitly shown in the episodes.”

“Yeah, that’s really great. The fans usually catch the hints because of that, don’t they?”

“They do. Everyone would, anyway. The writers shouldn't have taken this long to make our ship canon.”

“I know. It would have been much easier in the past.”

Lana nodded with a smile. “We should skip to the Alternative Universe scenes and rehearse them. I want to see how they find each other.”

Jen grinned as she read the details, “Here it says Emma is singing _Someday My Prince Will Come_ when Regina finds her.”

“Oh wow,” Lana bit her lower lip as she stared at Jen and the script. “The fans won’t miss that reference.”

“They surely won’t. Want to read it out loud? The first line is yours.”

“Yes,” Lana naturally leaned in closer to the blonde, draped her arm around her shoulders and started reading the first line, **“Emma? What the hell happened to you?”**

Jennifer had to wait a few seconds to continue because of her racing heart. _God, Lana made her feel everything she shouldn't be feeling._

With a sigh, she got into character and read her first line, **“You… You’re the Evil Queen.”**

**“You don’t remember me?”**

**“I know exactly who you are. My parents banished you.”**

**“Uh, no, they didn’t. And none of this is real. I’m your friend.”**

**“You’re no one’s friend. My father said you were a liar.”**

**“It’s not a lie. Where we’re from, we actually share custody of a son,”** Lana giggled, her breath tickling Jen’s ear. “Well, that seems a little bit _gay_ ,”she glanced at Jen who blushed immediately. _Shit._ “Don’t you think so, Jen?”

She gulped loudly before responding, “Uh, yeah.” 

The brunette’s hand started playing with her golden locks as she continued to read her line, **“Okay, it’s complicated, but… the point is, I risked my life coming here because… you’re the Saviour. And your family needs you.”**

“Then Snow and Charming enter the scene and Regina has to go away.”

Lana nodded as she brought her legs to rest on the couch to be more comfortable. Her side pressed against Jen’s and the blonde started finding it hard to _breathe._ “The only thing I’m imagining right now is you dressed like a _princess_ ,” Lana teased with a smirk as she bit her lower lip. _Fuck. This woman should be forbidden from biting her lips. It was just… so fucking sexy!_

Jennifer cleared her that and said, “You’ve seen me dressed like a princess before.”

“Yes, I have, but this one will be much cuter, I assume.”

Jen decided to turn her head to look into the brunette’s eyes. As she did so, she realized it had been a mistake. Lana’s face was already _very_ close to hers, so now their mouths were a few inches apart from touching. Her chest heaved as she gazed intermittently between her co-star’s lips and eyes. “Regina may not like it though,” she said in a small voice.

“I bet she won’t. She totally likes badass Emma Swan better,” the brunette flashed her a disarming smile and Jen felt her knees go _weak._

Pretending she wasn't feeling _nothing_ at the moment, she just continued casually, “We talk about our characters as if they were real. That’s so _weird_.”

Lana chuckled throatily. “They _are_ real, Jen. You just have to look at us. We’re Regina and Emma,” she pointed to herself and then at Jen.

“I… guess,” she said unsurely. “Sometimes I feel a lot like Emma. But most of the times I’m just myself. I surely prefer dresses to tight jeans.”

“I’ve noticed that,” the brunette said as she moved her head to rest on Jen’s shoulder. “You look very hot in those though.” 

Jennifer had to blink a few times, thinking if Lana had _really_ called her hot or if it was just her imagination. “What?” she turned her head to look into the brunette’s eyes but realized she couldn’t. The only thing she could see was the way Lana’s long eyelashes fluttered as she blinked.

“You look… hot in tight jeans,” her co-star repeated shyly and Jen viewed her cheeks turning into a light shade of pink. 

A lopsided smile formed on her lips. “I’m glad you think that,” she chuckled awkwardly, watching as Lana did the same. 

A moment in silence passed between them until Lana lifted her head from Jen’s shoulder and said excitedly, a cheeky grin on her beautiful lips, “You know what would be funny?” Jen nodded for her to continue. “We should schedule a day and pretend to be Emma and Regina, just the two of us.”

Jen frowned. “I’m not sure I understand.”

“We could get some clothes from Regina’s and Emma’s wardrobe and pretend for a day as if we were them, you know? Without all the cameras and the crew watching us. It would be _really_ fun,” Lana clapped her hands, seeming very excited about this crazy idea.

_Can they really do that?_

“What do you think, Jen? Liked my idea?”

“Um, yeah,” Jen was sincere. She had loved the idea, she was just a little bit confused about how it would work. “I’m just a little bit confused. Can we get clothes from the set like this? It won’t be a problem?”

“Hm, I don’t know. We can ask for permission.”

“Right,” she answered reluctantly.

“Better idea!” Lana exclaimed excitedly. “We can spend a day on set all by ourselves and play as if we’re inside the show!”

“Wow! That’s… _wow_.”

“Do you have the guts to do that, JMo?” the brunette teased, causing Jen to imagine this day where they would be Emma and Regina in… real life… _kinda_.

“Of course I do,” she responded with confidence. “We just need the permission.”

“I’m going to ask Adam and Eddy. I bet they’ll be too busy with their own holiday break and won’t care too much if we go there to play.”

“Speaking of the holiday break, how are we going there since we both have to stay with our families for Christmas?”

“We can go after. We have some other days off to do that. I mean unless you don’t want to.”

“I do, actually,” she smiled at the beautiful brunette.

“Great! I’ll text you when I talk to them. Now, shall we go back to rehearsal?”

* * *

 

&

Jen and Lana rehearsed the rest of the scenes, strictly following the script even though they didn't approve _all_ of it.

“This would be a great opportunity for them to be together,” the brunette commented with a sad pout. “Why not release _at least_ a hug? And why did they have to get Robin to ruin the scene? Ugh, that pisses me off!” she crossed her arms over her chest like a stubborn child, which made Jen laugh.

“If you want a hug so bad, all you have to do is _ask_ me, okay?” she teased, loving the sheepish smile Lana flashed at her. 

“Actually, I _do_ want a hug from you, Jen. You smell very good,” the brunette said, leaning in once more, causing Jen’s heart to beat _uncontrollably_. Also, Lana’s _spontaneity_ made her shiver. Why did she say those things? Was it on purpose? No, definitely not. That’s just who she was. A _beautiful-hot-smart_ woman who JMo had _romantic_ feelings for. 

She sighed contentedly and said, “Well, you smell good, too. Sometimes I think it’s apple. Or I’m just imagining things,” Lana circled her hands around the blonde’s neck and pulled her into an embrace. Jen immediately complied with the position and rested her hands on the brunette’s waist. 

“It’s probably your imagination, Jen. And you look like a fan saying these things. They think Regina and I smell like apples,” she chuckled. “Regina may have this fragrance in the fanfictions, but I surely _don’t_ smell like apples.”

“Maybe you do, but you don’t know. It’s hard to smell your own fragrance.”

“Do I smell like apple?”

“Uh, not exactly.”

“How do I smell like, then?” the brunette asked with curiosity in her eyes.

“Well…” without any shame, Jen put her nose on the crook of Lana’s warm neck and sniffed her perfume. “Right now, you smell like… _me_.”

“What?” Lana asked with a chuckle. She still hadn't moved an inch away from Jen and their _intimate_ embrace.

“Yeah, uh, you slept with me, didn't you? I-I mean… in my bed, with my sheets. So you smell like my laundry soap.”

“Oh, that’s nice,” the brunette smiled. “In the fanfictions, Emma smells like cinnamon.” 

Jen raised her eyebrows. She didn't know about that. “I wish I smelled like cinnamon. I probably smell of coffee most of the time.”

“You do. Coffee and flowers.”

“Flowers? My perfume has nothing to do with flowers.”

“Wasn’t you who said it’s hard to smell your own fragrance?”

She nodded with a smile. “True.”

“But let me confirm which is your scent,” it was Lana’s turn to put her nose on the crook of Jen’s neck. She smelled all over her skin, causing the blonde to feel ticklish and shiver.

“Uh, that tickles.”

“It’s proven. Flowers, indeed.”

Jen smiled and continued to hold Lana by her waist. They were each locking gazes into each other’s eyes as if there was nothing around but themselves. Jen really wanted to kiss Lana right now, but she knew that if she did, there were no excuses to say later. She would expose her feelings. 

Lana didn't seem to be bothered by this silent, staring moment between them, though. She still kept piercing Jen’s eyes without even blinking as a small smirk appeared on her irresistible lips. _God, she was such a tease._

A moment later, Lana cleared her throat and pulled away from the embrace to rest her spine on the back of the couch. “So, we finished rehearsing?”

“I think so.”

“I wish we could _rule_ the show, you know?” Lana started pensively. “Make SwanQueen like a fanfiction.”

Jen chuckled. “That would be crazy.”

“A good crazy, don’t you think?”

“Coming from Lana Parrilla, it's awesome and a _little_ _bit_ crazy, of course,” she teased with a smirk.

Lana slapped her playfully on the arm. “ _You’re_ the crazy one, JMo.”

“No way! You’re surely the crazy one. It wasn’t me who cursed an entire land just to get a happy ending,” Jen shrugged playfully.

“Are you _insulting_ my character, Jennifer Morrison?”

“Insulting is not the exact word I’d use. I’m just teasing you, Parrilla,” the blonde said with a shy smile.

“You know I can kill you in _seconds._ ”

“Uhh, so now we’re _really_ into character.”

“Don’t underestimate me, Miss Swan. You have no idea what I’m capable of,” Lana leaned in with that killing look on her face. _Damn_. _She loved to do that, didn't she?_

“Have mercy, Your Majesty,” Jen kneeled on the couch and put her hands together in a begging motion. “Don’t hurt my parents!” she said Emma’s lines, mocking her own character in the process. 

Lana started laughing excitedly. “I can’t wait for us to play SwanQueen!” Lana reached forward and wrapped Jen in a tight embrace. _Again._

“Me too. It’ll be _mind-blowing._ ”

* * *

 

&

After Lana had left her house, she went straight to bed to stare at the ceiling. It wasn't a productive thing to do, but Jennifer needed to think _properly_. Those hopeful feelings she had now were _killing_ her even more. She knew that Lana had a husband, and also knew that she couldn't do anything about it. Well… if Lana wanted to be with her, though… she wouldn't complain at all…

_Shit. She can’t think like this._

This situation wasn't good for her heart either. Having to work every day with the woman she had strong feelings for and not being able to do anything? Ugh, _fuck this._ She should stop bothering so much. At least she and Lana were hanging out together more than before. It was better now, wasn't it? Definitely.

* * *

 

&

The next day, Jen was on the set again getting ready for her first scene in the Alternative Universe. She was dressed in princess clothes and loved the braids in her hair. The dress even more; it was gorgeous. Lana would love her outfit… or _mock_ her mercilessly. 

“Miss Swan! You look so cute!” Lana entered the dressing room where the makeup woman was finishing up Jen’s makeup. 

“Don’t call me cute. I’m still _badass_ ,” she replied, looking at Lana through the mirror.

“Not so much now, little girl,” the brunette teased. “Can’t wait to hear you singing,” she smiled mischievously.

Jen sighed and turned on her chair to face her co-star. “Well, I have no arguments against you today. I’m sorry, but Emma Swan is as peaceful as a princess.”

“Good to know that I’m on top today.” 

_Don’t think about dirty things! Don’t think about dirt- fuck. Too late. Imagining Lana on top of her was really hot. Damn._

“Only today, Your Majesty. Only today.”

Lana grinned and leaned in closer to the blonde. “I think we should change some things,” she whispered in Jen’s ear as if it was a secret. 

“What things?” the blonde whispered back.

“I know what is written in the script, but I also think we should… you know, _spice things up_ like we are not aware of what was told in the script… Do you understand what I’m saying?”

“You’re saying that we should do other things in the SwanQueen scenes and go _beyond_ the script?”

“Exactly,” Lana smiled excitedly. “Ready to hear the directors screaming at us? You know how strictly they follow the script.”

“Well, I didn't want to hear any screaming but I’m willing to piss them off today.”

“Great! Let’s make SwanQueen canon! Or… sort of,” Lana held out her hand for Jen to stand up.

“Let’s do it.”

* * *

 

&

Lana and Jen had filmed some scenes already, and they couldn't technically improvise something at the time. But the next one, Lana told Jen that she was going to do something. 

They were now in Regina’s castle, where Regina would try to wake Emma up from the dream.

**“…Seriously?”**

**“Anything to protect my parents.”**

**“Emma, I don’t want to key to your kingdom,”** Lana threw the key on the floor and stepped forward, which wasn't written in the script for Regina to do it. **“I just… I just want you to remember who you are and get you back to Storybrooke,”** Lana leaned in and reached out to touch both of Jen’s arms, shaking her slightly as if trying to ‘wake her up’.

“Was she suppose to do that?” Jen heard the whispered voice coming from the crew.

Jen kept focused, trying not to be bothered by them. **“Storybrooke? Like in my dream? How do you know of my dreams?”**

**“Oh, c’mon Emma!”** Lana stepped away in anger. **“This! This is the dream!”** she gestured with her hands around the room. **“And now I have to wake you up,”** Lana leaned in again and was ready to kiss Jen when she heard a loud shout.

“Cut! What the _heck_ is that? That’s not in the script.”

Lana let out a giggle before turning to the angry director. Every person of the crew was looking curiously at them. Jen started to blush immediately. 

“Oh really? I thought I had to kiss Jen,” the brunette lied.

“No, no, no. There’s no kiss in this scene. Regina rips the Charming's hearts to wake up Emma.”

“Oh, right. Sorry,” Lana fake smiled and turned to Jen, who was dying to let out a laugh.

“I guess we didn't read the script properly, huh?”

“No, we didn’t,” the blonde smirked at her mischievous co-star.

They soon finished the scene perfectly, not giving any more trouble to the directors. The next scene was going to be at the lake. Jen was pretty excited for what she was about to do to piss off the directors.

“Action!”

Emma and Regina were walking and chatting, and it was Jen’s turn to say her line, **“Storybrooke felt like a dream, now this does. I mean, a good dream. The person I was here it wasn’t me. Fighting in the pain is what makes me, me. I’m good with that, even if it means my end,”** she huffed. **“Cause you know, that other person kinda… sucked.”**

**“Yeah. And singing Princess Emma… isn't my favourite model.”**

**“I didn't sing,”** Lana arched her eyebrows and gave Jen a look. **“You… saw.”**

The brunette smiled. **“Now let’s go home.”**

**“Uh, I wanted to say thank you to you again Regina,”** Jen leaned in with a smile. **“Thank you for waking me up,”** she hugged Lana who chortled quietly against her hair.

“Cut!” they heard the shout coming from the crew but didn't move a bit. “What is happening here?” the director now was close to them, looking very pissed with his hands on his waist.

“Am I not suppose to hug her?” Jen asked, pretending not to know what was happening.

“It’s not in the _script!_ ” he swung the piece of paper in front of them as his blue eyes flared with annoyance.

“Oh,” she muttered quietly and turned to face Lana, her expression completely serious. “Did you know about that?”

“No, I thought Emma was supposed to hug Regina. Are we wrong?” Lana asked the director.

“Of course you are! It’s not in the script!”

“I guess we misunderstood, then. Sorry about that.”

“Fine! Let’s take a break.”

* * *

 

&

Lana and Jen were laughing out loud inside the tent placed at the lake. There were just the two of them there, drinking coffee and getting warm on this chilly day in Vancouver. 

“That was so funny, oh my God! I loved to see his worried face when I was about to kiss you,” Lana said, taking a sip of her coffee.

“Priceless. We should do this more often if they take too long to make SwanQueen canon,” Jen suggested with a smirk.

“We definitely should.”

“I’ve never done something like that, you know? But it feels so good, even though they won’t accept what we’ve done.”

“Oh, they won’t. But I really hope it goes to the bloopers.”

“Oh yeah, me too.”


	8. Playing SwanQueen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi again! I need to explain a few things to be easier to understand while reading this chapter:  
> The fanfic lines that Lana & Jen will read will be in bold;  
> Lana & Jen explaining how Emma and Regina move in the fanfic is italic;  
> The fanfic that I chose is called What Regina Wants written by Standbackufools in ff.net.  
> I hope you understand clearly and have fun!

**CHAPTER EIGHT**

**Playing SwanQueen**

* * *

 

_**Jennifer's Point of View** _

When the tenth episode of Once Upon A Time was released, Jen watched with Ava in her house in Vancouver, popcorn in her arms, and her phone opened on Twitter. She saw the fans tweeting about the episode and freaking out about SwanQueen, which excited her immensely. She couldn’t wait for the fans to see the new scenes that Lana and she would film with Emma and Regina. 

The next few days, she used her day(s) off to enjoy the Canadian winter and her cute, beautiful puppy. She hadn't received any message from Lana yet, so she imagined her co-star was busy with her own things… or her _husband_. Ugh. 

It was on a Tuesday morning that Jen finally received some news from Lana. The brunette had texted her and said she had talked to Adam and Eddy about their plan to play SwanQueen and that they had said yes, but they would have to do it before the holidays because after the holidays they would be even more busy with the second part of season six. 

Jen didn't think Lana’s idea would happen that soon. To be honest, Jen wasn't prepared _at all_ for what was coming. She didn't know exactly _what_ and _how_ they would perform there. And Lana hadn't said much either. Her texts were very brief.

**Lana: _We’re going to meet at the set on Thursday at 9 am. Is that good for you?_**

**Jen: _Yes. Can we get the clothes as well?_**

**Lana:** **_They said we can use Regina’s office as a scenario and borrow some clothes. They were totally fine with it ;)_**

**Jen: _Cool. Should I be prepared for something?_**

Jen had no idea why she had asked that. She just felt something inside her chest that was bothering her increasingly. She knew that staying in a room alone with Lana never did her any good. She had to take very good care of her self-control if they were going to pursue this. 

**Lana:** **_No worries. It’s gonna be fun. See ya on Thursday! Xoxo ;)_**

It was basically that. Jen shouldn't worry then, right? Everything would be fine… _Right?_

* * *

 &

“So… we’re here,” Jen said when they first entered Regina’s office. She was eager to play this _game_ if we can say that way. She kept wondering day and night about how they would work this out. Now that it was really going to happen, she felt eager and slightly nervous. 

They were already in costume: Jennifer was wearing tight blue jeans, a white tank top, and the inseparable red leather jacket. Lana was wearing a black tight skirt and long-sleeved white blouse with buttons — _which made Jen think about how much she craved to rip every single button of that sexy shirt._

“Yes, we finally are. I have some ideas for us to start. Do you have any suggestions?”

“Uh, not exactly…” the blonde replied shyly.

She actually had _plenty_ of ideas which included throwing Lana on that desk and fucking her _hard_. 

_Shit!_ She can’t think about that! Especially now that they’re going to _play SwanQueen_ and every single feeling she has for Lana is going to be on edge.

“I’ve been reading some interesting SwanQueen fanfictions these past few days and I got very inspired.”

“You have?” Jen widened her eyes in surprise. Her co-star seemed to be really into this… _playing_ thing. Jennifer should have read some fanfictions too.

“I brought this fanfiction with me today. I’ve read the synopsis and found it very… _amusing,”_ the brunette smirks. “I think we should start with this one and then act by ourselves.”

“What’s the fanfiction about?”

“Mayor Mills and Sheriff Swan; based on the first few episodes of season one. It’s called: ‘What Regina Wants.’”

“Interesting title,” Jen murmured thoughtfully. 

“They have such amazing ideas! It’s terrific!” her co-star said excitedly.

“I know,” Jen flashed her a shy smile.

Just the thought of _playing/acting_ with this fanfiction was already causing Jen to squirm. They would actually perform a real SwanQueen fanfiction, and apparently, would do _everything_ that was scripted in it.

“Are you excited?” Lana asked with a huge smile on her face.

“I surely am,” she grinned, feeling her heart thumping loudly against her chest. “Can I take a look at the fanfiction first?”

“I’ll text you the link. We will both need our cellphones to read it while we perform.”

“Okay,” Jen grabbed her phone from her pocket and opened her texts. Her fingers clicked on the link as her heart pounded uncontrollably. “So,” she started, feeling a little bit intimidated when she was regarded by Lana’s piercing eyes. “Did you read the whole story?”

“No. I only scrolled over very fast and thought we could discover by ourselves. I think it’s better and more exciting.”

“Yes, it is,” Jen chuckled uncomfortably, imagining how this would work if in the fanfiction Emma and Regina had to kiss each other.

_Would they do exactly how it was scripted?_

“Just a question before we start. Are we going to do exactly everything that is written here?” the blonde asked.

Lana nodded. “Indeed we are. But I think we should establish some rules first. If we need to stop at some moment, we should have a specific word to use it.”

“Uh, yeah, sure. What about we just say _magic?”_

“Sure, I think that will do.”

“Okay,” Jen smiled despite her heart sinking inside a pool of anxiety.

“Let’s see how much we can learn from our fans,” Lana smiled lopsidedly. 

“Yeah, we’re used to this, right? Reading and acting. It’ll be easy.”

“Easy and fun,” Lana unlocked her cellphone and clicked on the Safari, where the fanfiction was open. She looked at Jen’s cellphone to see if she was on the same page as herself. “It doesn't matter the location on the fanfiction since we can only use Regina’s office. Let’s just read and act at the same time just like we do when we rehearse the scripts.”

“Okay, no problem.”

“Ready?” Lana asked, searching for Jen’s eyes for an answer.

“Yes, let’s start.”

_“Regina is seated at her desk waiting for Emma to come in,”_ Lana sits at the desk and continues reading. _“Emma arrives but Regina didn't even acknowledge her presence. Finally, the mayor set down her pen, and leaned back in her chair, eyes finally resting over the blonde,”_ Lana read everything seriously, and she did all the things that were said, just like Jen, who was reading on her own phone. **“So then… Deputy. How are you finding the job so far?”**

_“Emma’s brow creased,”_ Jen started reading the details at the same time she performed Emma. _“And she tucked her hands into the back pockets of her jeans._ **You call me to your office just for a chat?”**

_“The mayor only smiled back and gestured for a chair._ **Of a sort. I more just wanted to check up on Storybrooke’s newest member of the police force. See how you were doing.”**

_“Ignoring the chair, Emma stayed standing, glad of the advantage of height it gave her._ **Fine, thanks. If that’s all, I’ve got real work to do.** _She turned to go.”_

Jen was liking this very much so far. The fanfiction wasn't like she had thought before. They were just performing the lines and enjoying the sassiness of their characters outside of the show.

_“Regina rose from her chair, graceful as a tiger,”_ Lana rose from her chair, sniggering as she read. 

She was probably liking this as much as Jennifer was. 

_“Regina regarded her carefully, her eyes leisurely travelling over the entire length of Emma’s body._ **No, it’s not at all. I’m saying this both as the mayor and as a concerned citizen of this town, Deputy. I think that you’re in far over your head.”**

_“Emma turned back to her, unable to resist their constant game of arguing._ **Why? Hoping I’ll hate it and that’ll be the one thing that makes me decide to leave town? Fat chance.”**

_“With a laugh, Regina indicated the blonde to re-enter her office more fully._ **Please, Miss Swan. You’re only here because I tolerate you to be.”**

_“Emma wasn't having it and stayed where she was. An eyebrow raised, her arms crossed over her chest._ **Really? ‘Cause I’m pretty sure you’ve been trying your best to get me to leave ever since I got here.”**

Lana smiled, approaching dangerously as she waited for Jen to read Emma Swan’s thoughts. 

_“Emma shivered and then wondered if the Mayor always kept the heat in her office so damn low. That had to be it, right? Certainly, it wasn't because of that smile… completely devoid of anything warmth or friendliness at all,”_ Jen swallowed hard when she looked at Lana and viewed her with that _sexy_ smile that Emma had just mentioned. God, she was taking this very seriously, wasn't she? 

_“For that matter…”_ Jen continued reading aloud, noticing that Lana was very close to her right now. Damn it. _“When in their conversation had the mayor gotten so damn close? She could practically feel Regina’s breath on her skin; could almost taste the smugness in that smirk. The mayor’s hands moved towards her,”_ Lana’s hands moved as Jen read, now with a slight flush on her cheeks. _“And Emma was caught between wanting to pull away and morbid curiosity about what that hand would do. She stayed put. There was no way in hell she’d allow Regina to gain so much power over her.”_

_“Lightly, the hand touched down on Emma’s upper arm,”_ Lana read and touched Jen’s upper arm, as she remained very close to the blonde. **“Miss Swan, I own this town. Do you really think a few… embellished criminal charges and arrests are the worst I can do? If I wanted you gone, rest assured, you’d be gone.”**

**“I thought Mr. Gold owned the town. You’re just the mayor,”** Lana laughed in the Evil Queen way, causing Jen to quickly come out of character and smile at it. _“The tip of a pink tongue slid from between Regina’s lips, running over the edge of her own teeth. Emma watched it, and then shook herself, unable to believe she’s been doing it,”_ Jen did as it was said and watched Lana play Regina Mills closely, watching that marvellous tongue of hers show up, as the will of kissing the gorgeous brunette grew inside her. 

Shit. It was _not_ the time to think about this. Lana was too close to her.

**“Wrong. He owns the land and the buildings. I own the people. And believe me, of the two, its far better a position to be in.”**

_“That wandering hand began sliding up her arm, and Emma glanced down at it, but didn't step away. Yet. Regina’s fingers began to lightly play over her shoulder,”_ Jen’s eyes travelled down to where Lana’s hands were, her body shivering completely by the contact. 

Actually, she didn't know how her voice was still working well.

**“Everyone in this town belongs to me. If you’re going to stay here, Miss Swan,”** Lana said very seriously, her expressions bringing every kind of effect on Jen’s body. _“Regina’s fingers crept up to her neck._ **You’ll belong to me, too. It’s as simple as that.”**

_“Emma moved faster than she could even think about it, stepping back quickly, raising her own hand defensively in case the mayor tried to do… whatever that had been, again.”_

Jen performed as she read, realizing that this Emma Swan was just like herself, trying to run away from Lana but being stopped right away by the _hot_ brunette, who she felt feelings for that she absolutely _couldn’t_ feel. 

_“Regina had placed herself between Emma and the door, blocking her way out,”_ Jen continued. _“Okay. She just had to get Regina pissed off at her enough to distract her. Shouldn't be too hard._ **You’re talking about extortion.”**

**“This isn't about extortion,”** Lana laughed. **“It’s about what I want. And at the moment, Miss Swan…”**

_“She came in closer again, and Emma took a step back,”_ Jen read and took a step back, gazing at Lana intently.

**“I want what I see.”**

_“Oh no. Hell no. Eyes widening with comprehension, Emma promptly bolted for the door. Hell with looking weak, Regina was crazy. Crazy and fast… how had she moved so quickly? And why wasn't she fighting that iron grip suddenly latched onto her arm?”_

Jen felt Lana’s hard grip on her arm, and she felt completely like the poor Emma Swan, being dragged down by this hot mayor and freaking the hell out when she touched her… Oh, God. Oh shit. She had to continue. Jen couldn't stop now.

_“Too late, she struggled, but the mayor’s grip on her was strong— far stronger than she’d have thought. Trying to think, she continued to fight as Regina pushed her backward. She was rapidly losing ground and didn't realize how much she’d lost until she felt the prison of the wall behind her back. Regina grinned and pressed herself even closer,”_ Jen held her breath when she felt Lana incredibly close to her. _“With wide eyes, Emma regarded her attacker, too stunned to speak.”_

Was this really happening? Lana pressing herself against Jen as if it was the most normal thing to do in the world. Were they really playing a SwanQueen fanfiction which appeared to have… _sexual content?_ Well, fuck. Lana didn't seem to be bothered with _any_ of it. She seemed to be really enjoying, actually.

With a loud sigh, Jen continued to be Emma Swan. _“Emma struggled again, and failed, and then felt those fingers again, trailing over her neck, and then wrapping around it and forcing it, too, against the wall,”_ Lana wrapped her fingers around Jen's throat but didn't press very hard, obviously, and left a lot of space for the blonde to breathe. _“Gasping raggedly for air, she clutched at Regina’s fingers, trying to pry them off her throat.”_

_“Regina was having none of it,”_ Lana started reading again, _finally_ , so Jen could have a break from Emma’s thoughts. _“And enjoyed the free reign her other hand now had over her body, fingers sliding themselves beneath Emma’s red jacket. Then beneath her shirt,”_ Jen immediately prevented a groan from coming. Damn, that was too much for her to take!

_“The first touch to her bare skin pulsed through like electricity, and the deputy felt her head tipping back of its own accord, grateful for the wall holding her up. No… this was wrong. She shouldn't be enjoying this…”_ This Emma Swan’s thoughts seemed to have been written for Jennifer herself! She was feeling exactly like her character, or maybe even _worse_. **“Don’t.** _She swallowed roughly, scrambling. Fighting wasn't working. Time to try something else. She licks her suddenly dry lips, meeting Regina’s eyes and trying not to buckle at the sheer desire she saw in them,”_ Jennifer watched as Lana’s eyes became full of sheer desire instantly. **“You… you really think assaulting… how’d you put it: ‘Storybrooke’s newest member of the police force’ is a good idea?”**

**“Oh, please.”**

_“Regina loomed, and her lips were even closer now, almost touching Emma’s,”_ and she was, indeed, dangerously close to Jen. The blonde swallowed hard, even though it wasn't scripted for her to do that.

**“I own the sheriff’s department most of all.”**

Jen sighed before continuing. _“And then hot lips brushed over her ear, and Emma gave a small strangled cry, and wished it didn't feel as good as it did,”_ Lana leaned in, her hot lips brushing over Jen’s ear, just like it was scripted. Jen didn't even have to pretend the small strangled cry that came from her mouth. _“…Or that it wasn't followed by the mayor’s tongue tracing over the crown of her ear.”_

Fuck. Lana’s tongue was so _hot_  against her ear. Jennifer could fucking die right now!

_“Her legs promptly turned to jelly. She buckled a little and was almost glad the other woman was pressing her so firmly into the wall. She’d have fallen otherwise._ **Don’t…** _She groaned again, the protest sounding far too faint for her liking. She was having trouble concentrating, and her body was making it quite difficult for her mind to insist this was wrong. This was Regina Mills, for fuck’s sake.”_

Jen felt her co-star’s smirk grow wider against her ear and felt the pressure against her body to become even stronger than it was before.

**“Because you’re fucking Graham?”** Jen continued. _“It came out barely above a whisper, and she was almost proud she’d managed it at all. Though no small part of her protested when the mayor’s tongue and lips left her ear. For the first time, that smug smile faltered.”_

**“You know about that?”**

_“Emma hoped her grip would tremble, or loosen, or something. But it stayed firm. She was well and truly stuck. Still, she tried to press on._ **Yeah. Caught him sneaking out of your house last night. Really, Madame Mayor? Fucking the sheriff in the middle of the night, with my-…your son in the house? Disgusting.”**

_“Regina’s expression changed, but she couldn't tell if it was better or worse. She looked… well, far less angry than Emma had hoped, to be honest. She almost looked impressed. The tip of her tongue emerged again, and Emma couldn't help looking at it, watching as it traced its way over the mayor’s lips.”_

**“You’re right,”** Lana said and Jen continued.

_“Swallowing, Emma moved her gaze away from those lips and back to the brunette’s eyes, her own worried and dark.”_

**“This is much better.** _With one hand still around her neck and the other teasing over the skin of her hip, Regina leaned in even further, and covered Emma’s lips with her own.”_

Jen’s heart pounded like crazy inside of her chest. She didn't know what to expect from coming next. She, again, realized one more funny thing: none of them had yet said the word _magic_ to stop the scene from happening. Both of them seemed to be _very_ into this, especially Lana, that when Jen less expected, surprised her again, pressing her lips against the blonde’s just like Regina did in the fanfiction with Emma.

Oh, she had waited so long to feel those lips on hers again… And it felt so good! Soft and rough at the same time, drawing delicious feelings to her lower stomach… Jen was feeling aroused before this whole playing thing, but now she was incredibly _wet_. She could feel the wetness in her centre soaking her panties. She also felt like touching Lana’s body, but the grip pressing on her own body was too strong, which made she think that Lana was still _very_ _much_ into character.

Fierce lips pulled away from hers but stayed very close. Jen could still breathe the same air as Lana. Their lips could easily touch again.

“Continue reading,” Lana said with a hoarse voice, her eyes not averting one inch from Jen’s pink, bruised lips.

_“Squeaking in as much protest as she could muster, the deputy fought again, arching her back to push the other woman away. And wishing… God, wishing those lips — rough and fierce and incredibly demanding — didn't feel so damned wonderful,”_ Jen was panting hard. Her heart was beating so fast that she thought it would jump out of her chest. Lana’s expression though… it was _killing_ her. She seemed to be in fully desire mode, not caring about anything else but the fanfiction they were performing. Jen took a deep breath before starting again with trembling hands holding the phone. _“She kissed back. She may as well. Hell if she was going to just lay against the wall and submit to this.”_

Jen didn't wait any more seconds to kiss Lana again, demanding to be as rough as her co-star had been. Demanding to be just like Emma Swan was in the fanfiction. 

She pulled away to start reading again, her panting now making hard for her to read properly without sighing in contentment. _“A rumble from the mayor and then the kiss deepened. She felt Regina’s tongue sliding along her lips, demanding entry,”_ Lana kissed her again, deepening the kiss just like it was said and slid her tongue along the blonde’s lips. _“Emma parted them automatically, arching her tongue forward to meet the other woman’s. Eyes closing, her hands followed the curve of the brunette’s arms and came to rest on her shoulders. She squeezed them roughly, angrily, matching the force of their kiss.”_

Both of them moaned in unison when their tongues met, bringing the heat and sharing the taste. Jen almost let her phone drop when she squeezed Lana’s shoulders hard, bringing her even closer, making their breasts touch with force.

Now they were both panting hard, gazing at each other’s lips as if something was about to happen. Or another kiss that wasn't scripted. 

Jen observed Lana’s lips which now were very red and bright — and also very tasteful — and controlled herself from not kissing the brunette again. She had already forgotten about the fanfiction and Emma Swan’s thoughts. Now it was only hers, confusing her mind telling her what to do and the rest didn't exactly matter.

Deep down, she didn't want this fanfiction to end. It seemed as though reality to her. But she also knew that it was over. Those kisses had led them to a very dangerous place where Jen, without thinking twice, would go even further with her co-star if she could. Her better angels right now were telling her to stop this and control herself. Lana was married. She had to remember that.

“Um, _magic,_ ” Jen said, hearing Lana clear her throat as she stepped away from her, a small smile on the corner of her lips. She started pacing around the room while Jen watched her warily. 

“Wow, that was very… _intense_ ,” Lana commented causing Jen to arch her eyebrows. 

Jennifer was too thrilled to say something coherent, so she just murmured a, “Yeah.” 

“Their writing is very… _pleasing_. I’m even more impressed. Acting and feeling this way as Emma and Regina was very… overwhelming. What do you think, Jen?” Lana approached her, causing the blonde to widen her eyes a bit, not knowing exactly what to do if Lana came too close once again.

“They-they’re pretty good.”

“Did you like what happened here?” the blonde swallowed hard; the image and taste of the kiss coming back to her mind as her heart pounded completely out of control inside her chest. 

“I did,” she responded in a low tone, not dealing quite well with Lana’s inquisitive tone. The brunette had her hands on her waist and regarded the blonde intently.

“Do you think we could create a fanfiction like this by ourselves?”

“I guess so.”

“Want to try?”

“We’re going to write or-”

“No writing. Just acting and improvising.” 

Jen nodded. Lana seemed eager to do it. “I think we can do it. We just learned something from our fans, didn't we?”

“Yes. I thought that maybe we should change the season, but… season one was so fun. I miss it.”

“Me too.”

“Or maybe we should just continue with this fanfiction by ourselves. What do you think?”

This fanfiction had driven Jen a little bit out of her mind… If they followed the same plot again, she wouldn't know how to control herself… However, she couldn't say no to Lana, could she?

“Uh, okay, let’s continue.”

Jennifer was shaking internally in anticipation. She really hoped her acting skills didn't leave her right now.

**“Do you want me, Miss Swan?”** Jen felt her heart skip a beat when Lana walked towards her at an incredible speed; their bodies one more time were pressed together, making Jen close her eyes instantly to savour the sensation. **“Answer me,”** the hoarse voice murmured in a whisper close to her ear. 

**“I don’t,”** Jen cursed herself when her voice trembled. 

**“Of course you do. I can feel you,”** Lana’s tongue travelled around the blonde’s earlobe, causing the latter to moan.

Damn it! She can't moan. That can’t happen again.

Jen felt Lana moving her hand around her back, sliding it down her spine until it reached her ass. The brunette squeezed hard, bringing Jen’s body towards hers in a bump. She then lowered her mouth and started placing open-mouthed kisses on Jen’s neck.

Shit. Lana was simply out of control, wasn't she? She needed to be fully into character to make such a thing… Fuck, this was driving Jen crazy! She was so _wet_. She wanted Lana so bad…

When Lana said she wanted to continue with this fanfiction, Jen didn't imagine being in this position again. She thought they would get into a dialogue, or a fight like Emma and Regina always did. But apparently… nothing is what it seems.

**“Mayor Mills… you’re assaulting me,”** Jen said, still feeling the hot, open-mouthed kisses on her neck. 

**“I’m doing exactly what you want. I’m playing with you, Miss Swan.”**

Suddenly, something in her mind made her consciousness wake up. Many thoughts came to her as if to show her that this was wrong. _Completely_ wrong. 

Lana was definitely _playing_ with her. This whole situation wouldn't be real on the next day. It would be like it never happened. They’re just friends. At the end of the day, Lana would always come back to her husband and Jen would be alone. _Without Lana._ Jen couldn't let this affect her like this. She couldn't let this go on…

In a fast movement, she pushed Lana gently off of her and walked to the middle of the room, starting to pace around it. Her head crazy with thoughts and her hand on her waist.

**“What is the problem, Miss Swan?”** Lana’s — Regina’s — angry voice was heard. Jennifer had to remember that they were still in character. 

**“I won't let you play with me like this. You have someone else. You have Graham. I’m not going to be your fucking toy,”** Jen was angry. She could feel the adrenaline in her veins, making her act as though this was her _reality_.

**“You can’t deny yourself from me, Miss Swan. I can feel that you want me as much as I want you,”** the brunette approached with that smug smile on her face.

**“This is wrong. You can’t have sex with a man and then come to have sex with me! That’s not how it works.”**

**“I don’t care about Graham. You’re more important. I want you, Miss Swan. Only you,”** Jen looked at her, wondering if this was real. If this conversation was between Jen and Lana, and not their characters. 

If this conversation was about the reality of… _Lana’s marriage._

**“You’re lying.”**

**“Of course not.”**

**“You only want to use me,”** Jen could feel the derision in her voice while her eyes watered, but she made sure to hold herself as much as she could. Crying wasn't happening.

**“Do you have… feelings for me, Miss Swan? That’s why you’re acting this way? You don't want to have casual sex because you feel more… don't you?”**

**“You must be out of your mind!”** she protested.

**“I’m right, aren't I?”**

**“I’m not giving myself to you because I know you’ll leave me for that man. I know that, in the end, you’ll always come back to him!”**

**“What? I-”**

“Stop. Magic,” Lana widened her eyes at her. “I-I need a… a break. I’ll be right back.”

Jen walked towards the door; her eyes too blurred to focus on anything else; her ears too hurt to hear Lana’s concerned voice calling out for her to come back.

She just left. And ran. Ran away from that _fiction-reality_. She needed to breathe. She needed to cry out loud and let those hurtful feelings take over her. She couldn't look at Lana. She couldn't be this selfish with the woman. 

She couldn't go back there right now.


	9. The Magic Trick

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Thank you for your comments and kudos. Welcome to the new readers. I hope you're enjoying this piece of my insanity.
> 
> PS: Same rules for reading apply in this chapter just like the previous one.
> 
> Enjoy!

**CHAPTER NINE**

**The Magic Trick**

* * *

 

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

Jennifer ran fast, away from Lana, as she felt the tears sliding down her cheeks. Her heart was crushing slowly as the pain took over. She looked down for a minute and realized that she was still dressed in Emma Swan’s clothes. She immediately felt like her character, as if she had been heartbroken by _Regina Mills_. Actually, it was how she was supposed to feel. But she had been stupid enough to _misunderstand_ the realities of their characters and her real life. Lana was probably very confused by Jen’s actions right now. The blonde shouldn't have acted that way. It was _immature_. She took things personally; let the emotions and feelings of the fanfiction take over her while they were performing as Emma and Regina.

Jen started to feel incredibly stupid and regretted immensely her previous actions. Now her face was wet and her eyes red-rimmed, and if Lana found her she would be deeply embarrassed. _Damn, why the fact that Lana was married made her do stupid things?_

She walked around the building they use as the town hall so she could hide before Lana came to find her. Well, there was still a possibility of her _not_ coming. But right now, she didn't want to think about this.

She sat on the grass and looked around at the green garden. She wiped the tears away from her face and sighed loudly. There was no one around, the city was very calm without the cast walking all over. 

After some long minutes of just resenting her own attitudes, she felt a presence behind her and knew that Lana had found her. 

“Jen?”

The blonde looked over her shoulder and immediately apologized, “I’m sorry,” she smiled weakly, feeling her cheeks blush. 

Lana flashed her a tight smile as she sat down on the grass beside her. “Why did you run?”

“I think I got too much into character and let Emma’s emotions take over me. I’m sorry I ran like that. It was stupid.”

Jen observed as the brunette scooted closer to her on the grass; their knees now touching slightly.

“I was worried about you. You should have said something instead of running away, Jen.”

The blonde nodded. “I know. I just… needed to breathe and be me for some minutes. I’m sorry. It won’t happen again,” she sighed and looked down at the grass. She didn't want to face her co-star. She didn't want Lana to notice that she had been crying.

“It’s okay,” the brunette grasped Jen’s hand and intertwined their fingers. “I understand you. When we rehearse like this… sometimes it can be very emotional.”

Jen raised her head to finally face her co-star. “You’re feeling emotional too?”

Lana squeezed Jen’s fingers reassuringly. “I’m feeling a mix of emotions right now. Sometimes, when we’re rehearsing, I don’t know who I am anymore. It’s very confusing,” she sighed, smiling weakly. “And I feel everything so deeply just like you, Jen. We just can’t let these emotions take over us. It’s just… _work_.” 

_It’s just work._ Jen couldn't express how much those words hurt her. Their rehearsals and kisses have meant _nothing_ but work. Jennifer and Lana are nothing but friends who occasionally make out because of their job. The fact that Jen has feelings for her co-star is merely her _own fault._

She glanced at her co-star with a blank expression. “You’re right. I’m very sorry.”

“Don’t be. It’s okay,” the brunette smiled. “Come here, give me a tight hug,” Jen couldn't help smiling back as she hugged Lana, smelling her great fragrance.

The brunette put her face on the curve of Jen’s neck, as she always did, and let it rest there for a few minutes. The blonde felt goosebumps with the contact and hugged Lana tighter because of it. It was a comforting hug. _A hug that Jennifer never wanted to let go…_

The first to pull away was Lana. She had this smug smile on her face and seemed to be up to something. “I have an idea,” she said. 

“What is it?”

“Let’s have lunch and then I’ll tell you.”

* * *

 

&

“Are we really going to walk in costume?” Jen asked, gesturing to their clothes.

“Yeap! They’ll think we’re Emma and Regina, especially if we go to Granny’s.”

“You wanna go to _Granny’s?”_

“It’s called Cannery Cafe, actually,” Lana smiled, pointing to the building.

“Oh, yeah, that’s right.”

“Being here without the setting is weird, isn't it? But it kinda gives me the feeling that Storybrooke exists in real life.”

“I know, I feel the same way. Especially now that we’re in costume about to enter the fake Granny’s.”

Lana smiled. “It’s really cool.”

“Yeah.”

The entered the cafe and walked over to the table in the corner, where Regina — apparently — always sat in the actual show. 

“What do you want to eat?” Jen asked, taking a look at the menu. 

“Do they have apple pie?” Lana smirked and then winked at Jen, who immediately blushed. 

“I… I guess they do,” she replied, averting Lana’s eyes to look intently at the menu.

“Great. I’ll have a burger and apple pie for dessert.”

“Regina Mills would _never_ eat a burger,” she teased with a smirk.

“That’s true. But I guess someday she would follow Emma’s opinion, don’t you think?”

Jen smiled gracefully. “Yeah, Emma would definitely persuade Regina to eat something greasy.”

“And Regina would definitely fall for her charm,” Lana rolled her eyes playfully.

The waitress — who was not Ruby nor Granny — approached them and asked what they wanted. Jen ordered a burger just like Lana, which was unusual for her to order.

After the waitress was gone, their eyes found each other again and Jen almost melted at the grin Lana flashed at her. All the pain Jen was feeling before was just gone by seeing how much Lana seemed to care about her. Husband or not, Lana would always look out for her because she was an awesome person.

An idea came to her mind and she decided to just go on with it. “Can I try something?” she asked, suddenly feeling slightly confident.

“Yes, sure,” the brunette replied nonchalantly.

“Can you close your eyes for me, please?”

Dark brown eyes regarded her questionably as she asked with a suspicious tone, “Why?”

“You’ll see.”

Lana narrowed her eyes at the blonde but then closed them slowly. Jennifer quickly reached her back jean pocket and found a quarter. She had learned a trick when she was young with her father that she had never forgotten. It amused her and she enjoyed doing it with people to surprise them.

“You can open your eyes now.”

Lana gazed at Jennifer, and then looked around, noticing that clearly nothing had changed.

“What did you do?” the brunette asked curiously.

“Nothing. I just wanted to make fun of you,” Jen said mockingly.

“What? You can’t do that to your Queen!” Lana said dramatically, impersonating her character.

Jen chuckled happily. “I’m just kidding, Lana. I actually want to show you something.”

“Fine,” the brunette mumbled, pretending to be angry when she clearly wasn’t.

“You can see my hands on the table, right?” Lana looked at Jen’s fists resting on the metal table.

“Yes,” she answered quizzically. “Why are you asking me that?”

“Oh, nothing important. I just… see something different in you,” Jen noticed Lana’s cheeks become a light red. 

“What do you see?”

“Can you come closer, please?”

Lana narrowed her eyes once again and reluctantly put her elbows on the table to lean in closer to the blonde. Her delicious scent invaded Jen’s nostrils immediately, causing her to smile.

“I think I just found money in your ear.”

“You found what?”

Jen pulled a quarter from behind Lana’s earlobe and showed it to her. “Wow, Parrilla! I didn't know you were so wealthy.”

Lana opened her mouth in shock, regarding the coin in wonder. The blonde only grinned, feeling proud of herself.

“How did you do that?”

“It’s not me, it’s you.”

“You won’t fool me with a magic trick, Jennifer Morrison.”

“I don’t want to fool you, Lana Parrilla,” she replied mockingly. “I swear I have nothing to do with this coin,” she raised her hands in front of her chest, trying to show innocence. 

“You’re learning magic tricks?”

“No magic tricks here, lady. Anyway, I’m gonna keep this coin. Thanks, Lana.”

Jen made a movement that showed to Lana that the coin was going inside her pocket, but instead, Jen kept the quarter in her hand, hidden in her palm.

“Oh! I can’t believe it!” the blonde exclaimed. “There’s another one coming out!”

“Are you serious?”

Jen did the trick very quickly again and picked the coin from Lana’s earlobe. She started laughing when Lana took the coin from her hands to analyze it.

“This is a trick. I’ve never heard of this one before,” she said, still focusing on analyzing the coin. The blonde just shrugged nonchalantly. “I can’t believe you fooled me into this.”

“At least you had fun… didn’t you?” Jen asked shyly, her confidence faltering.

“I did, but now I want you to teach me this trick.”

“There is no trick here, woman. I’m telling you,” she protested.

“Teach me,” Lana said loftily, her eyes in a deep black.

“A magician never reveals their secrets,” the blonde asserts.

“You’re not a magician.”

“I’m a lot of things that you _don’t_ know, Parrilla.”

Both of them immediately blushed by that sentence’s content. Jen thought about many things she couldn't think of and Lana, _well_ , she didn't know why the brunette was blushing. _Was she thinking about the same dirty things as Jennifer?_

“Here are the burgers, ladies. I’ll be back later to bring your desserts. See you in a few,” the waitress brought their orders and left quickly again.

Jen cleared her throat and looked away from Lana. “Great, let’s eat.”

“You’re not escaping this.”

“I already did,” she giggled at Lana’s annoyed face.

“Fine, JMo. I’ll let you win this time. But only today.”

They both laughed at each other after a moment, realizing how they were looking like Emma and Regina: fighting over stupid things and provoking each other mercilessly.

They ate lunch calmly, chatting in between and teasing each other a few more times. When they finished eating the delicious apple pie, Lana said she should pay the bill since coins were coming out of her ears. Jen only laughed and shook her head.

“We’re dividing the bill. No arguments on that.”

Lana shrugged and said, “Fine. No worries.”

They paid the bill and then left the diner. Lana suggested they should walk around for a while, observe the city of Steveston that now looked very peaceful without the cast and crew walking all over the streets. 

“Hey,” Jen called and the brunette turned around to look at her. “Before lunch, you said you had an idea. What was it?”

“Oh, right. Never mind, it’s boring,” Lana waved her hand in the air dismissively.

“But I want to know.”

“Ha! You don’t tell me your magic trick and I won’t tell you my idea. Now we’re even, Morrison.”

Jen showed her tongue playfully to Lana and rolled her eyes. “Fine. I didn't want to know, anyway.”

“Liar.”

Jen shrugged and put her hands in her back jean pockets. They had stopped walking and now remained in a comforting silence. She was taking a look around when she noticed that she didn't know what they were going to do next. Would they go home after Jen’s embarrassing attitude?

“Umm, so what are going to do now?” the blonde asked tentatively.

“Well,” the brunette started a little reluctantly. “I think we could play SwanQueen again? I feel like it’s helping us a lot to get to know our characters and, you know, the rehearsing and improving part is great for our acting skills.”

Jen stayed silent for a moment. The thought of being alone with Lana _again_ where everything could happen between them with the excuse of rehearsals; where she would feel vulnerable and let her emotions for the brunette take over her once more.

“If you don’t want to, that’s fine,” Lana said in a small voice.

Jennifer should deny it. Yeah, she definitely should. Jen had discovered earlier today that rehearsing or _playing SwanQueen_ with Lana did no good to her feelings. But there was still a small part of her that wanted desperately to continue with this insanity. It wasn't her fault how much she loved to kiss Lana and be able to touch her svelte body. 

She sighed and then smiled at the brunette, who seemed to be relieved. “I want to. Sorry again for my attitude earlier. It was stupid.”

The brunette shook her head and said, “Forget about that. Let’s enjoy the rest of our time as Regina and Emma.”

Lana grasped Jen’s hand and they headed to Regina’s office while smiling shyly at each other.

* * *

 

&

“Jen, where do you want to start from?”

“Can I choose any scene from any season?”

“Sure you can.”

“Okay. Umm… I always thought that something was missing in the scene where Emma goes after Regina and finds her in her vault. It’s just after she brings Marian back from the Enchanted Forest.”

“Oh, I liked that one.”

“Do you remember the first lines?”

“How could I forget? The Swens posted pictures of that scene for a whole _month_ ,” she laughed and Jen nodded, laughing too. “Same rules? We say magic when we want to stop?”

“Yes. We improvise after the actual lines are over?”

“Yes. And let’s pretend this office is the vault.”

Jen nodded as she walked to the front door and reentered to start the scene.

Lana huffed in annoyance and said, **“What do I have to do to get you to leave me alone, Swan? Go. Away.”**

**“I’m an idiot.”**

**“Finally something we can agree on!”** Lana snarked, though there was a hint of amusement in her tone.

**“I'm an idiot because I’ve been down this road before.”**

**“Irritating me? Yes, you have.”**

**“I didn’t…”** the blonde stammered, thinking about what to say next.

**“You didn’t?”** Lana encouraged her to continue. 

Jen loved improvising. She always had these crazy ideas when filming, writing or directing something. And what she was about to say right now, it would change the whole scene.

**“Because I'm stupid. I didn't have the courage to say how I feel before. I'm really sorry.”**

_Why these scenes always had some connection with their real lives?_ Jen wondered, realizing just now what she had said as Emma Swan.

Lana stayed in silence and after a few seconds, she said, **“That’s all you're gonna say?”**

**“What else do you want me to say, Regina?”**

Lana sighed and stood up from her chair. **“Everything.”**

The blonde took a few steps closer and said, **“I finally had the courage to come to you. It took me a lot of thinking, but I just couldn’t wait anymore,”** another step and Jen realized she was full into improvising mode. She was just going with the flow; doing exactly what she thought Emma had to do. **“Wait for what?”**

Her heart pounded loudly in her chest when she realized what she desperately wanted to do. With no further thoughts, she followed her own desire. **“To do this,”** Jen pulled Lana by the waist and crashed their lips together, melting at the soft texture of those plump lips. The blonde had wanted to kiss Lana again so badly. But now that she realized that the only thing they’ve basically rehearsed was the _kissing parts_ , she decided to end the kiss, afraid Lana would reject her. **“Please, tell me you feel the same way.”**

A thumb caressed Jen’s thin lips and the brunette said, **“Why did you take so long?”**

Jennifer was caught by surprise when Lana grasped her face with both hands and pulled her in, their lips meeting once again. The blonde’s hands tightened the hold on Lana’s waist, bringing her body flush against hers.

Lana’s hand started to caress Jen’s neck while she also played with her blonde locks, causing Jen’s skin to shiver. The kiss suddenly deepened and their tongues met, causing Jen to gasp at the feeling of the languid kiss. 

Lana’s tongue brushed across her bottom lip, and Jennifer felt an unbearable heat burn between her thighs before she pushed the brunette slowly backwards, leading her over to the desk. Their tongues moved in sync as if they had been kissing during their whole lives.

Jennifer was even more aroused by now. She could feel her panties completely soaked, and _damn_ , she wished she could touch Lana between her legs and make her come loudly as she writhed beneath her… 

Following her line of dirty thoughts, Jen acted on impulse when she grabbed Lana’s rounded ass, pulling her hot body against hers once again. A moan erupted from the brunette’s lips and Jen almost lost her mind. Her hand on the blonde’s neck started raking the nails on the sensitive flesh, tracing a path that would definitely leave some marks. 

Jennifer pushed Lana gently onto the desk, and that’s when the brunette pulled away from the kiss. A long moment passed while they kept staring at each other’s bruised lips. Lana had probably realized what they had been doing this whole time and came to her senses that kissing Jennifer was probably _wrong_.

**“Emma,”** the brunette said breathless, staring between Jen’s eyes and her mouth. “Shit, I don’t know what to say.”

Jen blinked, noticing that it wasn't Regina talking right now but Lana. They were still in each other’s personal space and Jen just couldn't let Lana go. The passion of their kiss had driven her crazy. Jen didn't know what had possessed her. But she wasn't the one who started. Lana seemed to have enjoyed it as much as Jen had. _God, Lana will be the end of her._

After what seemed long minutes, the brunette straightened her posture on the desk and Jen immediately stepped away, knowing it was her cue to let go of the gorgeous brunette who looked a bit disheveled now.

“Sorry, I forgot to say magic,” Lana said, smiling shyly as she seemed to compose herself.

Jen licked her lips, still able to taste the remnants of the hot, wet kiss she shared with Lana a few minutes ago. 

“It’s okay,” she smiled weakly.

“I think we got a bit… carried away with the kiss,” the brunette commented, her cheeks blushing a faint crimson colour.

Jen swallowed, feeling her own face burning into flames. “Yeah,” she chuckled awkwardly. “Sorry, uh-”

“No, I’m sorry. It’s… it’s okay. It’s what Emma and Regina would probably end up doing, anyway.”

The blonde nodded promptly, resting her own hands on her waist. She actually didn't know what to do with them now that she didn't have Lana in her arms. _Fuck._

Jennifer started thinking about how _weird_ this was. Lana had a husband, and yet, she seemed to enjoy kissing Jen when they rehearsed. That confused the blonde so much. Now, she found herself speechless and with no idea of what to do or what to say. Lana seemed to be feeling lost just like Jen.

What she wasn't expecting though, was for her co-star to want to continue playing SwanQueen. 

“Now, what about a plot where Regina and Emma are married?”

Jen gulped loudly, listening to the word _married_ and remembering who Lana _belonged_ to. _Shit._ But Jen wouldn't say no. She didn't want to say no. Them continuing with this could turn into another chance of kissing Lana, and she definitely wouldn't miss another opportunity. Who knows when they would be doing this again?

“Sure, how do we start?”


	10. Theories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Short chapter, but also important ;)  
> Thank you for your support!  
> Enjoy the insanity!

**CHAPTER TEN**

**Theories**

* * *

******_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

After the crazy, _arousing_ day she had with Lana, Jennifer was ready for the holidays to begin. She was feeling _satisfied_ with the previous happenings on that Playing SwanQueen day with her co-star. Lana, with her ability to cause Jen to lose control constantly kind of freaked her out. However, Jennifer felt satisfied with how things remained between them. It was very _delightful_ to be with Lana Parrilla. She was always so interesting and cheerful. Spending time in her company was what Jen liked most these days. 

On Friday, it was Christmas’s Eve so Jennifer flew back to Chicago to spend time with her family. Her mom’s food was delicious and she had plenty of fun with her whole family and friends. During the night, when everyone else was sleeping peacefully, Jennifer laid in her bed and opened her Twitter account. Nothing interesting had happened… until Lana posted a photo of her Christmas holidays. Which her husband wasn't in the picture and she was only with her friends. _Weird, right?_

The _murmurs_ started quickly after that and Jen was very impressed by the theories of Lana’s fans — or better, how everyone else said, the _Morrilla Fans_. The crazy theories included Lana divorcing her husband; Lana having a fight with her husband; Lana being with her friends instead of her husband; and Lana having an affair with Jennifer Morrison.

Okay, the last theory caused Jen’s stomach to receive excited butterflies, even though nothing of that was true and it would _never_  turn into reality. Shaking her head, Jen locked her phone and tried to get some sleep. She wished her mind could focus on sleeping, but apparently, it couldn’t. Jennifer could only think about her fans’ theories and how she wanted them to be _right_. How she wanted _Morrilla_ to be real. 

_Ugh_. She hated these thoughts. It only served to torment her.

Jennifer forced her mind to think about something else, but as much as she tried, in some way, it always came back to Lana Parrilla. Their last _playing_ scene on Thursday was _exhilarating_. Jen had felt slightly unsure of how to act _married_ with Lana. Well, not herself, but Emma Swan. The scene was basically Lana’s idea and she seemed really excited to do it. So Jen had put in her mind that she just had to play along:

_“You know, there was a scene that we did on season four that seemed like Regina and Emma were actually married.”_

_“Really? Which one?”_

_“It was the 4B, just after Robin left Storybrooke and Emma brings a root beer to Regina.”_

_Jen remembered almost everything about that scene. It was literally perfect for SwanQueen to be endgame._

_“Thinking about this now, it looks like they were really married. I don’t remember how the fans’ reactions were.”_

_“Me neither. But I guess we should start from there. They’re married and Emma brings a root beer and kale salad to Regina in her office. There’s no Robin. Only them.”_

_Jen smiles at that. It was nice to hear Lana saying what she expected for SwanQueen. Jen always knew the brunette believed in SwanQueen, but she also always thought it was only to please her fans. But it clearly wasn't just because of that. Lana cared a lot about the ship and she was really into it; she wanted them to be canon._

_“Want to start?”_

_Jen heard the question and quickly nodded. “Yes. Let’s just pretend I have some kale salad and root beer in my hands,” Lana chuckled as Jen left the office only to come back later._

_“How do you feel about kale salad and root beer?” Jen asked as she placed the imaginary items on Regina’s desk._

_Lana looked at her and grinned happily. “Good to see that my wife finally decided to come to visit me,” the brunette said wryly and Jen frowned._

_“I’m sorry. Things got complicated at the station. I promise that I’ll never miss our lunch again. And sorry that I made you upset.”_

_Lana’s smile grew as she got up from her seat. “Don’t worry, dear. I’m not upset with you,” she walked towards the blonde, a smirk playing on her lips. “I just… missed my beautiful wife,” she put her arms around Jen’s neck and the blonde immediately felt her heart race._

_Damn, Lana was too close again. But despite all the craziness of her stupid heart, she remained focused on her character and placed her hands on the brunette’s waist._

_“Wow, you’re complimenting me now? That’s really something unexpected. May I ask if an alien abducted my wife?” Lana chuckled and smacked Jen’s arm playfully. “Ouch, don’t slap me, Madam Mayor!”_

_“I compliment you sometimes.”_

_“Sometimes is not always, babe. But I don’t mind much. I can feel your eyes lingering on my body every time I turn my back to you,” Lana’s cheeks blushed._

_Okay, Jennifer was literally playing along. They were actresses, weren't they? They had to perform as professionals. Jennifer didn't have to bother and think too much about it. If they agreed to continue rehearsing, Jennifer would do it even if it made her crazier about Lana._

_“I will not deny nor affirm this,” Lana stepped away to take a look at the — imaginary — kale salad and root beers. “It looks like someone found another place than Granny’s for take-out.”_

_“I did, but only for you. You know that I prefer grilled cheese.”_

_“We both know that you eat like a child.”_

_Jen was glad that they were using some lines from the real scene right now. She felt like she had some real time to breathe before Lana did something unexpected._

_“I do, but that doesn't make you love me less, does it?” Jen asked with fake concern._

_Lana only rolled her eyes and leaned in again, intertwining her hands with the Jen's. “Of course not, dear. I love all your flaws and especially your skills. I love you even though you tried to destroy my apple tree,” Jen sniggered. This scene was turning out to be really funny._

_“Oh, so you wanna talk about the things we’ve done to each other? I have a list: all good and bad things we’ve done.”_

_“Please, don’t tell me you’ve put our sex life in it,” Jen’s blood went all to her cheeks._

_Shit. Fuck. What the hell! Jen couldn't help thinking about an actual possibility of sharing a sex life with Lana. She shouldn't think about that, especially if she was this close to her._

_“You did, didn’t you?” Jen felt Lana’s soft fingers caressing her blushed cheeks. She bit her lower lip and looked sheepishly at the brunette. “I don’t mind it as long you don’t show it to anyone besides me.”_

_“That won’t be a problem. I promise I won’t,” Jen smiled reassuringly._

_A satisfied smirk appeared on Lana’s face.“Good to know. Now, I want what you promised me last night,” her co-star pressed her body against Jen’s and the latter felt her legs turning to jelly._

_Jesus Christ! Why did Lana do this?_

_“I-” Lana put her forefinger against Jen’s lips, shushing her._

_“I just miss you like crazy right now,” Lana pulled her into a kiss and Jennifer melted completely, even though she had just felt those lips on hers minutes ago._

_The brunette moaned into the kiss and pulled Jen’s body closer to hers, her hands caressing the blonde’s back while the kiss deepened. Jennifer held Lana tight by the waist, enjoying immensely the pressure of those amazing lips. Their bodies pressed together was the other amazing thing that the blonde couldn't stop thinking about._

_When Lana pulled inches apart to breathe, the blonde started thinking about something to say and not let the moment end in an awkward silence._

_“I really think that some aliens abducted my wife. My Regina would never kiss me in her workplace.”_

_“You’re complaining too much today. I can kiss you whenever I want to. Isn't that what we agreed to when we exchanged our rings?”_

_Jennifer bit the inside of her cheek to hide the huge smile that was coming. This thought made butterflies appear in her stomach._

_“I’m sorry, I’m just… impressed by your actions.”_

_“You’re lucky because I woke up in a very good mood this morning. So please, appreciate that.”_

_“You bet I will!” she grinned widely before she twirled Lana, one hand holding on her waist and the other holding on her neck as she gave her a passionate kiss, hearing the brunette's surprised gasp by the sudden movement._

_When Jen pulled Lana to her previous position, they both were a little bit flushed by the heated kiss._

_“Wow, that was very… good,” Lana commented, still out of breath because of the kiss._

_“Emma is so awesome, isn't she?” Jen said flatteringly as she waved a hand at herself._

_“I can’t disagree. Regina feels very pleased,” Jen cleared her throat and smiled with embarrassment. “I think our lips know each other very well now,” the brunette said and chuckled after, causing Jen’s cheeks to burn red._

_“Yeah, uh… I guess we have some chemistry.”_

_Lana looked away for a second, her cheeks also blushing a deep red. “We apparently do. Thank you for accepting this, Jen. I can say that I've learned a lot about this adventure. I’m very sure we’re going to play Emma and Regina very well when their scenes come.”_

_“Yeah, uh, it was great and I think the same. We’re very… uh, good together.”_

_They both smiled at each other as their eyes locked. Long seconds passed and Jennifer realized neither of them could look away. Those deep brown orbs were hypnotizing her and she felt like she was being drawn to the brunette. Thankfully, her self-control finally came to the surface and she didn't pull Lana into a desperate kiss. She couldn't do that. They weren't into character anymore._

_After what lasted long minutes, Lana said, “We are very good… together.”_

And that was how they ended their conversation and parted ways.

All of the scenes and fanfictions they performed on that day had surely been an adventure to Jen, especially to her fragile heart. But still, even knowing that her heart had been at stake, she would definitely do it all over again without thinking twice. Jennifer would just never say no to kissing Lana Parrilla.

* * *

 

&

One week after Christmas, on the last Friday of the year, Lana would post the photo of the tag of who would be the _Seventh Oncer of the World._ Jen remembered very much about the day the brunette took photos of her and how she tried to make everything look perfect. Lana had posted the pictures that she took of the others of the cast, and each Friday, Jen would take a look at who had been the Oncer of that day. She couldn't avoid being anxious for when her own time would come.

On this Friday, Jen spent most of her time on Twitter, paying lots of her attention to what her fans were saying. She had been reading some of their tweets for a few weeks and she noticed that they were very hopeful that she would be the last Oncer Lana would choose and post a photo of in 2016. They also had many theories, as always: Jen was going to be the last Oncer because Morrilla is _real;_ because SwanQueen will be canon in 2017 (well, that one is actually going to happen); because Lana wanted to make the Swens happy; because Lana liked Jennifer. 

_What a huge imagination they have, huh?_

Later that day, the photo was finally posted and Jen was officially the Seventh Oncer. Shit. The _fandom_ went completely wild with the news! The Morrilla/SwanQueen fans couldn't stop re-posting the picture every five-seconds with a different caption. It was insane! They really believed that Jen would be the one, and in the end, they were right, and so, so happy. It could be seen as a stupid little thing if you weren't part of the fandom, but the way a picture could make them happy was _unbelievable_. Jen was grinning from ear to ear. She was so happy, too. It was very cool to _participate_ in their joy. The only thing Jen couldn't understand was _why_ she had been chosen to be the last one. She didn't have any clues, and believing in her fans’ theories wasn't an option. All of it was too insane to be true.

Sometimes, Jen caught herself wondering if their crazy theories were true in an alternate reality. If Morrilla was real… God, if Lana and Jennifer were together, their fans would completely be out of their minds. _Literally_. Jen too, by the way. She would be out of her mind and so, so _happy_.

* * *

 

&

As New Year’s arrived, Jen decided to accept the invitation of her friends and go to New York. She hadn't seen them in a few months and it was a great opportunity to visit them now. Also, it would be good for her to clear her mind and think about other things besides her gorgeous, master of the kissing, co-star. 

On New Year’s Eve, Jennifer drank a whole lot of alcohol and danced a lot with her friends, feeling immensely grateful for her life and friends. However, as the night came to an end, Jen found herself drunkly splayed on the couch of Ashley’s house. When she closed her tired eyes, her beautiful co-star came to her mind and invaded her thoughts. Jen smiled as she remembered their heated kisses a few days ago and how good it had felt to have Lana in her arms. She wondered when Lana would have new interesting ideas for them to play SwanQueen again. 

As sleep took over her, she entered a world in where she would definitely be satisfied the whole night. A world where Jennifer and Lana were together and did naughty, dirty things…


	11. Tequila

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Sorry I didn't post it yesterday. I wrote a lot more, but it got too late to post it and I had to sleep.  
> I hope you like this 8k words chapter ;)
> 
> PS: from now on, I'll only be posting the chapters on Sundays. Time is getting shorter to write. Sorry.
> 
> Enjoy the insanity!

**CHAPTER ELEVEN**

**Tequila**

* * *

 

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

For Jennifer, the year had started with the right foot. She was very happy about the things that were happening in her life. After the amazing moments she had with Lana, she found out she couldn't stop smiling. And that made her remember something she really liked to do: the hashtag #101smiles. 

Jen remembered very clearly what Lana had said to her. She suggested that Jen should be more active on twitter and talk more to her fans. Jennifer knew that they missed her. With Lana’s advice, she decided to come back with the tag and entertain her fans with her daily photos. She also knew that they loved when she was around. The number of messages and pictures that she received every day with this tag was incredible! She couldn't be more happy with her fans.

They were back on the set again filming as many hours as they could. Jen felt tired most of the time, even though she loved doing this. And she was also loving to be around Lana again. After the rehearsals they’ve had, Jen could only think about kissing her co-star. _Sometimes she even forgot that Lana had a husband…_

After a full day of rehearsal and some scenes filmed, Jen felt fulfilled and a little bit confident. She was missing Lana like _crazy_ , and she shouldn’t… but she just couldn't help it. And when her confidence boosted a little, she also felt a bit _flirty_ , so it became harder to hold herself from doing _stupid_ things.

Jennifer felt like going out with her co-star today, just to chat and spend some time with her. She loved how Lana laughed at her jokes and the sensation made her feel _invincible_ somehow. When they were together, there was always that small flicker of hope in her heart; something that said there was still a very _tiny_ possibility of them being together.

With this slight flicker of hope, Jen decided that maybe, if Lana wasn’t busy, they could spend some time together today, as _friends_. Because that’s what friends do, right? They hang out together all the time. It wouldn't be weird if Jen asked her out, would it? Well, not asked her _out_ literally. Just… to meet somewhere. Being seen in public was probably not a wise idea for them yet. Unfortunately.

It was about time Jen proposed something for Lana. Her co-star was always the one with the ideas. And Lana would probably say yes, right? 

Withhusband or not, Jen profusely hoped her co-star would say yes to her invite. 

But first, where would they go anyway? What would they do?

Today was Friday, so getting drunk was an option. She got drunk with Lana once and had so much _fun_. She knew that the brunette was very funny without drinking, and even _crazier_ and funnier when she drank alcohol. The first time she saw her co-star slightly drunk was at the Once Premiere party. She didn't see much because they didn't spend a lot of time together back then, and Jen would never intrude if the brunette was with her husband by her side, but Lana had been overly _joyful_ and everyone could have noticed that, even if they didn't talk to her. It had been amusing to watch. 

The second time Jen saw Lana drunk was a month ago, right here in her house when they planned a Sunday night to watch the episode together. Her co-star had basically drunk a whole bottle of wine by herself and became a little bit drunk. Jen remembered being really surprised when the brunette kissed her senseless. Later that night, Jen had the pleasure to sleep beside Lana in her bed. _It was going to be hard to forget that memory, though._

Right now, Jen had made her decision. She would call Lana to invite her for a drinking night between _friends_. It was the perfect idea for them both to relax and talk about whatever they wanted to.

Jen had seen her co-star leaving the set an hour before her, so she would call the brunette when she got to her house. She was really hoping that Lana didn't have anything else planned for tonight…

When she arrived home, she quickly unlocked her iPhone and searched for Lana Parrilla on her contacts list. Jen suddenly started receiving second thoughts about this idea… Should she really do this? Wasn't Jennifer being too _invasive?_ No, of course not! They were just friends like Lana always said. There was nothing to worry about.

**_Jen: Hey. You still in Vancouver?_ **

**_Lana: Yeah. Haven't left for the weekend. Why?_ **

After fighting against more second thoughts, she decided to call the brunette and end this quickly:

_“Hello,”_ when Jen heard that deep voice coming through the cellphone, she froze. How could a voice do such things with her? _“Jen, are you there?”_

“I-I’m here. Uh, Lana?” she stammered and cursed herself mentally for being so insecure sometimes.

_“Jen, is everything okay?”_

The concern in Lana’s voice caused Jen’s stomach to do excited flips.

“Uh, yeah, everything is just fine. I was just wondering if… uh, am I interrupting something?” she stammered like a fool once again but tried to keep it together. It shouldn't be this hard to talk with her fucking co-star!

_“No, you’re not interrupting anything. Why you ask?”_

“Oh, I was just… wondering if we could… uh, do something tonight.” Jennifer was fucking sweating right now. _God, how she feared to be rejected._

_“What do you wanna do tonight?”_

“Uh, just… hang out or something?” she suggested with hesitance.

_“Oh, that’s just wonderful. I surely want to hang out with you, Jen. Where do you want to go?”_

Relief filled her heart and she smiled from ear to ear. “Uh, I thought you could come over and we could have some wine or just… watch a movie. Whatever you want would be fine for me.”

_“Oh, yeah, I really liked drinking with you the other night. And a movie would be great too.”_

“Awesome, uh, we’re settled then? You’re coming?”

_“Sure. What time you want me to come over?”_

“Right now, maybe?”

_“Okay, I’ll be at your house shortly!”_ Jen heard Lana moving on the other side. _“Oh, should I bring something?”_

“Whatever you want. But there’s no need to.”

_“Well, I’ll see what I can do.”_

“Are you sure I’m not bothering you?” Jen asked with a frown. She really didn't want to interrupt something Lana had with her husband or… _whatever_.

_“You’re not bothering me at all, Jen. I love hanging out with you. I’ve missed you, actually. Seeing you only at the set is not enough,”_ Jen sighed in relief, her heart getting warm with Lana’s words.

“That’s good to know. See you!” and she hung up.

_Wow_. Jen couldn't believe Lana was coming over again. She was fucking dreaming that this was happening right now! She was coming over again, but this time not to rehearse anything, only to hang out with Jen! Damn, she had to prepare herself for that. She had to be ready for Lana.

* * *

&

After taking a quick cold shower, Jennifer put on a long-sleeved, grey flowery dress, fixed her long hair, which was straight today, and applied some light make-up. After that, she started tidying up her house, even though it was already _very_ tidy. Ava didn't make a lot of mess, anyway.

“Hey, baby girl,” she called Ava. “Someone is coming here so you have to behave, okay?”

Ava barked at her and Jen smiled proudly, crouching on the floor to receive a wet kiss from her puppy. She got up and put some more food and water for Ava. When she was done, she looked around, finding everything perfect to receive her co-star.

Jennifer sighed. Well, it was not the first time Lana was coming to her house, but the blonde felt incredibly anxious about it all over again. _Ugh, she wished she had the power to control those butterflies in her stomach._

When the doorbell rang, Jen's heart almost jumped out of her chest. _Shit_. She _hated_ that feeling. 

Before walking to the door, Jen found a mirror on the wall and faced herself. She took a deep, steadying breath. “It’s Lana and you are _just_ friends. You have to open the door and have as much fun as possible with your co-star. Everything is going to be okay, don’t worry,” Jen told herself reassuringly and then walked to the door, feeling slightly better.

“Hey, Jen!” Lana greeted her with the most beautiful smile she had ever seen. Jennifer was slightly taken aback when the brunette leaned in and hugged her tightly by the neck; her fuzzy coat warming Jen’s body instantly.

“Hey,” the blonde said shyly. She couldn't help avoiding the light blush on her cheeks. She probably would never get used to this closeness between them without her stomach performing exciting flips.

Lana started taking off her black, long coat and Jen could finally see her whole outfit: she was wearing a blue jeans and a white, long-sleeved, see-through blouse that showed most of her lacy bra underneath. _Well, God dammit._

“How were your holidays?” the brunette asked while hanging her coat on the coat-rack by the door.

“Uh, wonderful! New Years’ was just… perfect. How was yours?”

“It was nice,” Lana said quietly with a small smile. “I brought us something,” she extended a paper bag towards Jen.

“What is it?”

“Open it for a surprise,” Lana winked, causing Jen’s face to blush once more. 

_Ugh, she really hoped the whole night wouldn't be like this. She hated to blush._

Ignoring her blushing cheeks, Jen grabbed the paper bag from the brunette’s hands and opened it, finding a bottle of Jose Cuervo tequila. _Holy shit!_

“You bought _tequila?”_ she asked in mild disbelief.

“Yeah,” Lana smirked. “Just a treat for our Friday night.”

“Uh, that’s great, Lana. Thanks,” Jen chuckled while she held the bottle of tequila. She just couldn't imagine Lana drinking tequila and _not_ getting drunk extremely fast. 

“I hope you have lemon and salt.”

“I sure do.”

“Great, so… instead of watching a movie, I was thinking that maybe we could play a drinking game.”

Jen arched her eyebrows. She wasn't expecting for that suggestion. “A drinking game?”

“Yeah, if you’re up for it,” Lana’s eyes were challenging her, and she could _see_ it clearly.

“I definitely am,” Jen smirked at her companion and turned around to walk to the kitchen, the brunette following behind. “What kind of drinking game do you want to play?”

“A question game. The rules are simple: if you don’t want to answer, you drink a shot.”

Jen chewed on her bottom lip as she placed the bottle on the counter. “That’s okay, I’m up for it.”

“Great. Do you want help with something?”

“Uh, sure. There’s cheese in the fridge if you wanna eat it.”

“I definitely do,” the brunette smirked and nudged Jen with her elbow. 

“So no wine for us tonight?”

“I think it’s better if we just stick with tequila tonight. Imagine what mixed alcohol could do to me,” the brunette sniggered, causing Jen to laugh too. She definitely was _imagining_ how that would be for Lana. “Where are we going to play?”

“The living room is good?”

“Yeah, it is.”

After they finished preparing the salt and lemon, and also the cheese, which Lana had cut in squared pieces for them both to eat as a snack, they took everything to the living room, including the tequila bottle and shot glasses and placed all the items on the small coffee table in front of the couch.

When they were well settled on the couch, cushions around them and their feet under their legs, Lana said it was time to start with the game.

“Does this game have any other specific rules?” Jen asked with curiosity.

“Well, you can only ask one question at a time. It can be any question you feel curious to ask. If you don’t want to answer, you drink a shot. I think that the most important rule is that I can’t make you answer me. It’s your choice only.”

Jen nodded in understanding while her heart jumped in excitement. She had so many questions to ask Lana… but ones that she probably wouldn't be brave enough to ask.

“Can I start?” the brunette asked and Jen nodded again. “Okay, um, did you believe that Adam and Eddy would make SwanQueen canon one day?”

The blonde chuckled. “To be honest, no, I didn’t. I was very surprised when they told us.”

Lana nodded. “I noted that. I was just relieved, you know? Emma and Regina being together made sense to me since the beginning. And putting Robin in Regina’s life wasn't a wise decision. I didn't like it at all, except for the fact that I made a great new friend.”

Jen cleared her throat. “Yeah, same with Emma and Hook. I actually thought it was a good idea at the time, but then, as I saw what Emma was becoming, I realized they had gone too far.”

“Totally agreed. Well, thankfully now our characters will be together on the show and everything will make sense. Cheers to that!” Lana grabbed her shot glass from the table and lifted it high.

Jen did the same, smiling at the beaming brunette. They drank it in unison, both wincing right after swallowing the strong liquid of tequila.

“Cheers indeed,” the blonde said with a grimace, causing Lana to laugh.

“It’s your turn now, Jen.”

“Okay, let me think. Um… What’s the most illegal thing you’ve ever done?” Jen asked, watching as Lana arched her eyebrow and her lips curled up in amusement.

“I stole a bra once from JC Penny and got caught.”

Jen laughed out loud. God, Lana would never stop surprising her, would she?

“I’ll let you laugh. It’s funny now, but at the time it wasn't at all,” Jennifer continued laughing, trying to hide her hilarity with the back of her hand. “I think you deserve a shot for laughing at me, Jennifer Morrison.”

The blonde nodded when her laughter ceased. “I think I deserve that,” she filled her shot glass with tequila and drank it quickly. 

“Okay, my turn now,” Lana started. “Have you ever had a crush on someone of the cast?”

Jennifer swallowed thickly the flavour of strong alcohol in her throat and looked away from those piercing, inquisitive eyes. She knew full well that she couldn't say the true answer to that question, so instead of drinking and hiding, she came up with a good excuse.

“Uh, I dated Sebastian Stan, and he was my crush for a while,” Jen shrugged, trying to look indifferent because, _God dammit,_ Lana had been her girl crush since day one of filming Once Upon A Time. She took a while to admit it to herself, but now that she did, she won’t deny it anymore. _Well, only to Lana herself._

“Oh, that’s right.”

Jennifer cleared her throat and asked, “What is something you’ve done that you wish you could undo?”

Jen watched in silence as the expression on Lana’s face hardened involuntarily and she frowned. The blonde waited for an answer, but when she saw Lana fill her shot glass up, she realized she wasn't getting one. Must be a serious answer, then.

Lana smiled shyly at her. “What memory do you just keep going back to?”

Jen sighed as memories of their latest making out moments came to her mind. _Shit._ It was a fact for the blonde that the most she could think about was Lana and her amazing lips. With a shrug, she filled her shot glass up and downed it, watching with the corner of her eyes as a smirk appeared on Lana’s lips.

“It seems like we’re even now, Morrison,” the brunette said with amusement in her voice.

“Yeah,” she chuckled. “What’s something you’ve done while drunk that you would never do sober?”

“You caught me again, Jen,” her co-star gestured her shot glass to the blonde, who just laughed.

“Sorry,” she shrugged with a lopsided smirk. This game was turning out to be really interesting. Jen just wished she could know all the answers to those unanswered questions.

After Lana drank her shot, she faced Jen and looked intently at her. “What made you invite me here tonight?” 

_Wow_. Jennifer wasn't expecting this kind of question, so she couldn't avoid the familiar light blush from appearing on her face.

Once more, she tried to act indifferent. “Well, we’re friends and I wanted to spend more time with you. Why you ask?”

The brunette grinned and Jen felt slightly relieved. “I was just wondering because it was the first time you did that.”

“Did what exactly?”

“Invite me over just to hang out.”

Jen was feeling her hands sweating by now. _Damn Lana and her inquisitive personality._

“We weren't that close before, even in the previous years the show started, so… today it seemed like a good opportunity to spend some quality time with you,” the blonde shrugged nonchalantly. She was telling the truth, so there was no need to freak out. _Except for the fact that she was omitting some significant details of how much Lana really meant to her._

“I’m glad you invited me over, Jen,” the brunette smiled gracefully. “It’s your turn now.”

As she thought about a question, Jen silently decided that she should be a little bolder on what she was asking even though the answers could cause her some damage. “Okay, um, what was your first impression of me?”

Lana smiled and then started chewing on her bottom lip. Jennifer observed her as she filled her shot glass with tequila and realized she wasn't going to get an answer. But then, surprisingly, the brunette started speaking, “When we were first introduced, we didn't talk much right away but… I realized what kind of person you were.”

The brunette paused for a while, staring at her shot glass as Jen grew incredibly impatient. “What kind of person am I?” she asked.

Lana smirked flirtatiously and the blonde felt her heart increase its beating rate. “Well, I first thought you were a very reserved person and fiercely independent. Also very free-spirited and-” the brunette chuckled dryly and downed the liquid in the glass.

Jen blinked at the sudden action, not understanding why Lana had drunk her shot. “Why did you drink it?”

“Because I can’t say the rest,” Lana said and Jen frowned as butterflies flew messily inside of her stomach.

“That’s _mean_ ,” the blonde said, still frowning at her co-star who just shrugged at her. “Thanks for leaving me extremely curious, Parrilla.”

“You’re welcome,” the brunette smiled with mirth and Jen couldn't help smirking. 

_God, she was surely not going to sleep well tonight too busy thinking about what else Lana was going to say about her._

“Well, since you drove us into specific, personal questions, I’ll follow your path,” Lana said carefully, her eyes showing mirth. “Have you ever been with a woman, Jennifer Morrison?” 

Her face burned intensely as her hands started sweating and her heart started beating so hard she thought it would jump out of her chest.

_Holy fuck. Did Lana really ask her that? For real?_

Jen cleared her throat before saying, “Uh, not exactly. You were the first woman I’ve ever kissed,” she said shyly.

“Oh, really?”

“Uh, yeah.”

They fell in a silence that Jen first thought it was a bit awkward. But as she observed Lana’s relaxed face, she instantly loosened her posture. _It’s all fine. It’s just a question._

“It’s your turn,” Lana said.

“Okay, um, have you ever been with a woman beside me?”

Lana grinned knowingly. “Oh, yes. Plenty.”

Jen swallowed the lump in her throat as she tried to pretend the familiar throb between her legs didn't exist. “Uh, cool. So you label yourself as bisexual?” Jennifer continued casually.

“No second questions. Drink a shot!” Lana exclaimed as she pointed a finger at Jen.

“What? Why?”

“It was _my_ turn and you asked me another question. You can’t do that. Drink it up!”

“That’s _so_ unfair, Parrilla,” Jen complained as she filled her glass with tequila.

“Drink it!” the brunette commanded with a smile.

Jennifer did what she was told and waited for the next question to come.

“Did you like kissing a woman? Well,” Lana rolled her eyes and smiled. “Kissing _me?_ ”

The blonde sighed loudly as she gazed at her glass shot, trying to avoid her co-star’s eyes as much as possible. She couldn't believe she was being asked that. The throb between her legs increased, and she tried to wipe the image of kissing Lana Parrilla of her mind once again. She would never answer this question. It was totally out of the picture.

Jennifer downed on her shot.

“ _What?_ You’re not telling me?”

“Of course not. You didn't finish answering my question either,” Lana threw a cushion at her. “Ouch! Don’t let the Evil Queen come out of you!”

“Shut up,” the brunette said, trying to hide a laugh. “Who won the game? Me, right?”

“I didn't know we could win this.”

“Of course we can. Actually, _I_ can. I only drank four shots while you drank five.”

“That’s because you made me drink one when I laughed at you and when I asked you a question twice,” the blonde defended herself.

“That’s right. It was a _fair_ game,” Lana said with a smug smirk.

Jennifer huffed in response. “You should drink another one so we could be even.”

“Is that so?” Lana bit her bottom lip as she gazed deeply into Jen’s eyes. 

“Yes. I can’t get drunk alone here.”

“Oh, so you think I’m not drunk, Morrison?”

Jen smiled lopsidedly. “I don’t know. You tell me.”

Laughing amusedly, the brunette said, “I surely am, girl.” 

Lana prepared her shot and also some lemon and salt this time. She narrowed her eyes at Jen before drinking the liquid and sucking the lemon with the salt right after. Jennifer watched as a lemon drop slipped past the brunette’s lips and fell on her chest. Jen’s throat dried as she wondered how it would feel if could lick the drop away. She became _thirsty_ to taste it but knew she couldn’t. 

“Uh… You left something fall… there,” she pointed to Lana’s chest. The brunette looked down to her chest and instinctively opened one button of her white, see-through blouse. _Holy shit._ “You can’t see it?” Jennifer asked, her voice so small that she felt breathless. 

“No.”

Swallowing the dryness in her throat, Jennifer decided to wipe her forefinger on the smooth skin and lick the drop of lemon clean from her own finger. When she realized that her co-star was watching her with surprise and parted lips, she quickly pulled her finger out of her mouth, feeling her face on fire as she did so. 

“Thank you,” Lana flashed her a disarming smile and laid down on the couch after. “Ugh, my head is spinning,” she complained, placing a hand on her own forehead.

Jennifer immediately felt worried and laid down beside Lana on the small couch. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, just… a little bit dizzy.”

“Not dizzy,” Jen said boldly as she took Lana’s hand that was on her forehead. “Just very drunk.”

The brunette laughed out loud and that was music to Jen’s ears. “Best feelings ever,” after a moment of silence, the brunette continued, “You’re drunk too, right?”

“Obviously,” she chuckled. “I really like the feeling of being drunk. It makes me more confident.”

Her co-star moved beside her and only stopped when her front was pressed against Jen’s side and her back to the couch. Then, the blonde became aware of the warmth of that curvaceous body so close to hers. The minimal sensation was so good that she closed her eyes momentarily just to enjoy the feeling.

A throaty, amused chuckled sounded in her ear. “Is that so, huh?”

When Jen looked to her side, she realized that Lana’s face was really close. She could easily lean in and kiss her. Even though her confidence was boosting right now, she would never kiss her co-star like this, afraid of being rejected.

Instead of dwelling on those feelings, she asked, “What is your favourite feeling about being drunk?”

The blonde watched as Lana’s shiny brown eyes changed into a deep dark of sheer desire. “I feel… _horny_.”

Jennifer widened her eyes instantly and swallowed her dry throat. _Oh, my God._ “Hor-horny?” she stammered, a blush creeping on her cheeks.

“Yes. Horny, aroused… wet,” her co-star explained calmly as if what she was saying was the most normal thing in the fucking world. _Shit._

The throb between her legs was unmistakable now, and she could also say that she was _wet_. _Jesus Christ, what the fuck was happening?_

“You do?” she asked breathlessly.

“Yes. You never get aroused when you drink alcohol, Jen?” Lana asked with an inquisitive tone. She seemed so _relaxed_ while talking about this. _Holy shit._

“I-I’m not sure,” she stammered once again, wanting to look away from those piercing eyes, but found out she couldn’t. She felt hypnotized.

“When you throw back a couple of shots and start to feel that familiar fire between your legs, it’s because of the alcohol,” the brunette explained quietly and they stayed in silence for a few minutes until Lana spoke again, “Are you feeling it?”

Jen chuckled humourlessly. “I-I’m feeling a lot of things right now.” 

The brunette smiled beguilingly. “That’s why I avoid drinking. It’s not good for my self-control neither my body.”

_Shit_. Jennifer was sure her face was red as a _tomato_. _Fuck!_ Have you ever been in a situation where the woman you want to… have sex with is freaking horny right in front of you? _Well, it’s not a very good idea when you know she’s taken and can’t have her that way._

Lana propped herself on one elbow and said with a chuckle, “You’re blushing.”

“I’m not.”

The brunette chewed on her bottom lip and then said, “You are, Jen. And you look cute. Is that because I said I’m horny?”

There was mirth in her eyes and Jennifer thought she was going to fucking _die._ How embarrassing was this?

Jen also started chewing on her bottom lip, realizing just now that Lana might be thinking of sex if she was really horny… _Fuck. For God’s sake, Lana Parrilla!_

“I need to pee, Jen,” her co-star said randomly and Jen quickly sprung into action, leaving the couch and standing awkwardly in front of it as Lana also stood up; that flirtatious smirk still on her face.

“Sure, I’ll wait here.”

When Lana was gone, Jen felt like she finally had a moment to breathe without those inquisitive, dark eyes scrutinizing her face. _Shit. What was that conversation?_

A bark called her attention and she looked to the side quickly and saw Ava jumping excitedly on Lana’s legs. The blonde’s heart warmed instantly when her co-star laid clumsily on the floor as Ava jumped on her and tried to lick her face.

Jennifer walked to them both, laughing whole-heartedly while watching the scene in front of her. 

“Ava really likes me, Jen!” Lana said as Ava barked excitedly while Lana petted her head.

_Indeed she does. She was not the only one, though._

With a smile, Jen said, “If you don’t leave her now, she will grow too attached to you and won’t stop running after you until you leave tonight.”

The brunette laughed. “I guess I should go, then,” she said as she stood up clumsily, almost falling backward, causing Jen to act quickly and hold her by the waist.

“Are you okay?” Jen asked worriedly.

“Yes, Jen,” she smiled. “I’m good,” the brunette looked down to where her hands were, and Jen noted that Lana’s fingers were around her biceps. Her co-star seemed satisfied with where her hands were. “Nice arms, Morrison,” she commented as she squeezed slightly the strong muscles.

The blonde blushed, and stuttered, “Uh-I- thanks.”

“There’s no need to blush, Jen,” the brunette leaned in, causing Jen’s eyes to widen. That hot mouth pressed against the shell of her ear and whispered, “It’s just a compliment.”

A shiver ran down her spine and went straight to her core. More wetness pooled between her legs and she realized she was really fucking _screwed._

“I’m going to the bathroom. Be right back.”

Jen was left alone with goosebumps all over her _damned_ _weak_ body. Trying to think about something else that wasn't Lana’s hot mouth in her ear, she crouched on the floor to pet Ava. After a few minutes, she heard the door of the bathroom opening and quickly stood up to wait for the brunette.

When Lana appeared in front of her, she realized her co-star had an impish grin on her face. “Jen, do you wanna dance? I really feel like dancing right now.”

The blonde smiled. “Yeah, sure.” 

Dancing was a good idea. At least they didn't have to talk while dancing. That would do Jen some good. She didn't trust herself to talk to a _horny_ Lana anymore.

“Great!” Lana started pulling Jen by the hand to the centre of the living room. “Do you have a stereo here?”

“Yeah, it’s right on that table,” she pointed to the small table in the corner, just by the fireplace. “What kind of music do you like?” 

“Put something with a nice beat.” 

Jen busied herself with the stereo and turned it on. She chose _Madness_ by _Muse_. This song really had a nice beat and the fact that it was called _madness_ made a lot of sense to her right now.

“Oh, yes!” Lana cheered. “I love this song! It’s one of my favourites!” 

Jen smiled at the brunette and watched as Lana started moving her hips slowly, seeming a little bit shy, but continuing to do so.

_“I… I can't get these memories out of my mind,”_ Lana started singing low. _“And some kind of madness… is starting to evolve.”_

Lana bent on her knees a little and started rocking her hips from side to side.

_“And I… I tried so hard to let you go. But some kind of madness… is swallowing me whole.”_

Jennifer sucked in a sharp breath when Lana started swinging her ass and caressing her own body with her hands. Their eyes finally met, and Jen could see Lana’s smile turning into a flirtatious smirk. The blonde had to avert those eyes as Lana’s hands started tracing on her body, sliding down her waist. She ran her hands up and down her legs, touching her knees and upper calves in a _very_ sexy way. She kept singing the song lowly, her mouth barely making any noise. 

Lana’s hands climbed up to her shoulders until it reached her own hair where she started running her fingers through the soft, black waves. Then, her hands slid lower, finding her breasts and squeezing it slightly, teeth meeting her lower lip during the action.

Jennifer gasped at the view. If she touched her own sex right now, she would know that she was _drenched._

Lana quickly stopped her dancing movements and asked with a disappointed look, “Why are you standing still?”

The blonde shrugged, not knowing exactly what to say. She was kind of hypnotized by that woman. Where would she find forces to do anything else besides _staring_ at her?

“Why don’t you dance with me?” Lana asked, her legs moving swiftly until she was close to Jen. She grasped the blonde’s hand and intertwined their fingers. “Do you want to dance with me, Jennifer?” 

That flirtatious smirk appeared on her lips again and she started to sway her hips slowly. The blonde swallowed hard before nodding as an answer. She also started to move accordingly to the beat, swaying her hips, leaning instinctively closer to Lana. 

Jen almost felt her heart jump out of her chest when Lana’s hands circled around her neck and started to sway with her, both of them now dancing together, accompanying the beat and moving in sync. 

_Shit. They looked like a couple. A fucking couple!_

Lana’s body pressed against hers and Jen had to close her eyes for a second and regain her fucking _weak_ self-control. _God, how much she wanted to give in and lose control for just a moment._ She wanted to kiss the woman who seemed to be torturing her in the most _wicked_ ways.She wanted to give her pleasure, to make her feel good; to show her how much she _desired_ her.

_Shit. She should stop thinking about this. It was getting way more difficult each second to control herself._

Everything got even more complicated when Lana turned to the other side, her back now to Jen and her ass in contact with the blonde’s private parts. Jennifer bit her lips forcefully and stopped the moan that wanted to come out. Lana had started swaying her hips and grinding her ass against Jen’s sex. _Shit, what the fuck was happening? What the hell was Lana doing? Jen was not made of fucking steel!_

Lana didn't stop grinding on her; she just kept doing it, moving her hips gracefully and causing the blonde to become fucking aroused that she could barely hold herself. Lana’s head bent backwards and rested on the blonde’s shoulder. Jen’s desire was to caress Lana’s waist, slide up to her stomach until her breasts. _God, she craved to touch everywhere of that woman’s body._

A low moan escaped her throat and she cursed herself. She wasn't able to muffle this one. The feeling was too good for her to pretend.

In a sudden movement, Lana turned around again and faced Jen. The blonde instantly blushed, and seeing how Lana was smirking at her, she felt the need to hide from this seductive woman and to try to breathe properly. But of course she wouldn't. She didn't want to let go of this amazing feeling.

“Dance with me,” the brunette whispered in Jen’s ear, causing her whole body to shiver. 

Jen started to move her hips slowly, feeling the beat of the music and Lana’s hands on her waist encouraging her to move in sync with her. Jennifer never thought she would be dancing so close to Lana Parrilla. She was feeling so _intense_ right now. The heat radiating between them, the slick sweat that glided down their skin, how they moved in sync, their ragged, short breaths. Each sway leaving her breathless, and the amazing feeling of Lana’s hot breath on her cheek… _God, it was too much._

The song ended and a new one started to play. Lana placed a chaste kiss on Jen’s cheek and then her warmth was gone. She disentangled herself from Jen and walked backwards, putting some space between them. 

Smiling shyly, she said, “I think we should eat something.”

“What do you want to eat?” Jennifer asked, still able to feel the drops of sweat on the back of her neck. _Lana had driven her crazy and then stepped away. It was getting really hard to control herself each day._

“Whatever you want. A snack would be fine.”

“Oh, okay. I have some potato chips in the cupboard. I’ll go get it.”

Jen walked to the kitchen, taking some time to calm her nerves and stop sweating. She drank a glass of water, grabbed the potato chips and then walked back to the living room. Lana was sitting on the couch while she chewed on her bottom lip. She was doing this a lot today. Maybe she was nervous, just like Jen? Could be possible.

“Here you go,” she extended the chips to the brunette, who grabbed it gratefully. “So, what are we going to do now?”

“I was thinking that maybe we could… um, write fanfiction?” Lana suggested. Her eyes were so dark and bright. It was hard to look away sometimes.

“You want to write or perform it?”

“Just writing. I’d be interesting to see ourselves thinking as Emma and Regina.”

Jen nodded slowly. She wasn't opposed to the idea. As long as she was close to Lana, she was good. And writing would be a lot easier when you didn't have to kiss and lose control. _God knows if Jen would be able to control herself with Lana today if they were kissing._

“Okay. I’ll grab my computer.” 

Jen walked away to her bedroom, feeling her head spinning a little. When she came back to the living room, she quickly sat on the couch and rested her back on the comfy surface. She seemed to be getting even drunker each minute. _Probably even drunker in desire, arousal, and cravings…_

She tried to concentrate on turning on the computer as Lana observed her every move. “Do you want to start writing?” Jen asked.

“Yes,” the brunette replied and grabbed the computer from Jen’s lap. “I was thinking that we could start with Regina inviting Emma to have dinner at her house. You like the idea?”

“Yeah, I’m just very _surprised_ that you can still think clearly like this. I’m not sure I can,” she chuckled at herself, causing Lana to do the same.

“Of course you can, Jen. People always say that when we’re drunk, we do everything better.”

Jennifer laughed out loud at that. “Lana, that’s a lie,” she said, receiving a shrug from the brunette. 

“Maybe writing is better when we’re drunk. Who knows,” she shrugged again and Jen smiled fondly at her.

“Okay, you start.”

Jen watched as Lana started typing furiously on the keyboard. She suddenly was very curious to know what her co-star was writing, but she didn't peek to try to see what was being written.

“I’m done. It’s your turn.” 

Jen started reading what Lana had written:

**Earlier that day, Regina had invited Emma to have dinner with her at her house. Henry was going to sleep over at Nick’s so Regina didn't want to be alone. Before Emma arrives, Regina decides to drink some wine to loosen herself a bit. She was always too stiffen around Emma, so maybe today she would act differently.**

**When Emma arrives, they start chatting, eat dinner and share some glasses of wine. When they’re done tidying up the kitchen together, Regina feels a little bit drunk. When she walks by Emma, who’s sitting on the couch of her study, she loses her balance and falls on the blonde’s lap.**

“Oh, wow. That’s good,” Jen mumbled, already imagining herself in that scene and how it would feel to have Lana on her lap.

“Write it, Jen. It’s your turn.”

Jen smiled shyly at her and then started typing:

**Emma is startled by Regina’s fall and immediately holds the woman steadily on her lap. She asks if Regina is okay and the brunette leans in instead of a response, getting closer to Emma’s face. Her breath smells a lot like wine and it’s intoxicating to have the mayor so close to her like this.**

Jen quickly gave Lana the computer back, not even looking at the brunette’s face. She was a little bit embarrassed and didn't want to know the brunette’s reaction when she read what she had written.

She heard the sound of the keyboard being used once again and waited patiently for Lana to finish it.

When she got the computer back, she read it quickly, feeling her hands sweating in the anxiety of what she saw:

**Regina wanted to kiss Emma so badly right now, but she knew she couldn't. So instead, she got off of Emma’s lap and started pacing around the study with a hand on her forehead.**

Jen should have seen this coming. Lana wouldn't kiss her in the fanfiction. Actually, Lana would never let Regina make the first move.

**Emma quickly stood up and followed Regina to the middle of the study. She was now pouring another glass of wine, with her front turned to the counter and her back to the blonde.**

**Swan approached the mayor and wrapped her arms around her waist from behind. She felt Regina turn tense by the sudden contact, but didn't let go of her. Emma pulled Regina’s hair to the side so she could have some space to look at the smooth skin of her neck. She didn't think twice and started placing chaste kisses on the smooth skin, feeling the mayor trembling slightly against her.**

Jen stopped typing and Lana quickly looked at her, her eyes still very dark and serious. 

“Did you finish?”

Jennifer was afraid of showing her writing to Lana. She could be mad or something, or just… _She didn't know!_

“Yes,” she gave the computer to the brunette.

Jen watched as Lana read the paragraph very attentively. Right now, she really wanted to know what would be her co-star’s reaction. A smirk appeared on Lana’s face and she licked her lips after, not looking at Jen yet. The blonde was dying inside for that reaction and felt very pleased with herself because of it.

“That’s… really good, Jen. It’s so…” she looked at Jen, her face blushing slightly. “ _Hot_. Shit, I have goosebumps all over me now,” she chuckled sheepishly.

Jen’s face turned red immediately. She wasn't expecting for Lana to say that out loud… _Fuck_.

“So… I’m a good writer, then?”

“Yes, you’re very good at it, Jen,” Lana sighed and bit her lower lip, seeming nervous.

_Why was she nervous? Was she getting fucking aroused just like Jen?_

Lana started writing again while Jen looked away quietly, thinking about all the sensations she was feeling right now. She realized her body had a mind of its own when it scooted closer on the couch towards Lana. Their thighs and arms were now touching, which caused a small gasp to escape Lana’s throat. However, her co-star continued typing without looking at Jen.

**Regina turns around and circles her arms around Emma’s neck, looking deeply into her green eyes. Regina feels Emma pulling her tighter against her own body and the blonde’s hands skim down, feeling the fabric of Regina’s red dress, sliding her hands lower until she reaches the mayor’s ass and grabs it.**

Lana put the computer on Jen’s lap and watched intently as the blonde read.

“Oh, you just read my mind. I would do the same thing,” Jen commented.

“What? Grab my ass?”

“Yes. I already grabbed your ass, though,” Lana blushed and Jen also felt her face warming. Jen didn't know at all how she could manage to say something like that out loud. _Was she out of her mind? What would Lana think of her?_

“You did,” she gave pause while looking intently at Jen who was lost in sexual thoughts about the brunette in front of her. “Do you like my ass that much?” Lana asked with a teasing tone. 

Jen cleared her throat, looked away as she realized she was turning bright red. “Do you really want me to answer that?”

“Why not? I know you would never say that out loud if you were sober.”

The blonde bit her lower lip and gazed at Lana — who always seemed to be even closer each second. “I wouldn’t. I’m very drunk. I’m sorry.”

Lana chuckled throatily. “Continue writing, Jen.”

**Emma leans in and their lips almost meet. Emma caresses the mayor’s plump lips with her fingers and is desperately wanting to kiss her. But instead of doing it, her hands once more skim their way up and down around the stunning body.**

Jen finished, and when she looked at Lana, she noted that the brunette was looking attentively at the computer. _Fuck, had she been reading everything while Jen was writing?_

“You think my body is stunning?”

Jen looked away embarrassedly and said, “Emma does.” 

That’s all she could answer. She couldn't say what she thought about Lana’s body, right?

“I didn't ask if Emma does. I asked if _you_ do,” Lana insisted.

_Jen was in trouble. Oh shit. She was clearly in trouble._

After some long seconds, she sighed in defeat. “Yes, I do think your body is stunning. You’re… _amazing_ , Lana.”

It’s incredible how the alcohol can give you courage.

“Thanks,” the brunette grinned fondly. “I like when you talk to me like this. It almost never happens, so when it does, I have to enjoy it.”

Jen chuckled awkwardly before asking, “What are you talking about?”

“What I’m trying to say is that when we’re drunk together, we say things we don’t have the courage to say when we’re sober.”

The blonde nodded. “That’s exactly what I was thinking right now.”

Lana smirked. “So you just said what you didn't have the courage to say sober?”

Jen blushed again. Well, _damn_.

“Kinda. Is that okay?”

“Yes, of course. I’m as drunk as you, Jen,” she gave pause. “Shall we continue with the fanfiction?”

“Uh, I’m sorry but… are we _really_ into this? Because all I can think about now is something… _sexual_ to write. I’m sorry, Lana, I-”

“I know,” Lana sighed. “That’s all I can think about too. These sexual curiosities and desires already exist inside our head, and when we drink, they can come to the surface. It’s completely normal.”

Jen swallowed the lump in her throat, once more trying to ignore the pang of arousal between her legs.

Lana’s body moved, resting on her side so she could face the blonde. “So… you’re feeling horny now?” the brunette asked casually.

_Holy fuck. What was she doing?_

Jennifer closed her eyes for a few seconds, trying to _ignore_ the sensation of Lana’s breasts pressed against her arm and the arousal pooling in her panties.

“You _are_ horny, aren't you?” Lana asked teasingly. “I know, it’s driving me crazy too.”

Jen immediately opened her eyes to look at the brunette, whose face was very close to hers already. “What?”

Lana licked her lips and said, “You.”

“ _Me?_ I’m driving you crazy?”

“Yes. _Ugh_ ,” Lana sighed loudly and moved her body again, her back now resting on the couch. “How can you not _see_ this?”

_What was she talking about?_

“See what?” Jen sat on the edge of the couch, her back turning to the side so she could face Lana better.

“See what I want.”

Jen swallowed thickly and asked, “And what do you want?”

“Isn’t it _obvious?_ ” 

Trembling fingers reached out and touched Jen’s thin lips. _God, she was dying inside._ Her heart was beating so uncontrollably that she could barely breathe properly. 

“I want _you_ , Jennifer,” fingers were replaced by lips that started to rub against hers slowly, teasingly. “I want to _feel_ you,” Lana placed her right hand in the middle of Jen’s breasts and slowly slid down, gliding through her stomach and then… Jennifer lost her breath. Her eyes were wide when she felt that warm hand reaching towards her covered sex. “How can you not see,” Lana’s eyes were staring fixedly at the blonde’s lips. Jennifer had lost the ability to move or speak. She was completely _petrified_. 

She could smell Lana’s alcoholic breath directly into her mouth, and she wanted to kiss her so _badly._ A gasp escaped her throat when she felt Lana’s hand on the rem of her dress, her nails raking on her skin slightly while it slid closer to her sex. When fingers touched her wet panties, she had to close her eyes. 

_Fuck. Holy fuck. Was that really happening? Wasn't she dreaming?_

“You’re so _wet_ ,” the brunette said smugly, and Jen could feel her smirk against her own lips. 

“Lana,” she murmured, still out of breath as fingers caressed her sex over the fabric of her panties.

She couldn't believe this was true.

“Yes?”

Jennifer finally opened her eyes, finding dark, deep orbs looking into her own. She instinctively pushed her legs further apart as her right hand reached out to grasp brunette locks. “I want you too,” she murmured, rubbing her lips against Lana’s.

Lana let out a breathy moan and it was her turn to close her eyes for a few seconds. After what seemed an eternity, Jen heard that sexy voice:

“So take me.”


	12. Explicit Feelings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I'm back, after a whole week :D
> 
> This chapter is very much mature, or explicit if you want to call it that way ;)
> 
> Enjoy the insanity!

**CHAPTER TWELVE**

**Explicit Feelings**

* * *

 

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

_“You’re so wet,” the brunette said smugly, and Jen could feel her smirk against her own lips._

_“Lana,” she murmured, still out of breath as fingers caressed her sex over the fabric of her panties._

_She couldn't believe this was true._

_“Yes?”_

_Jennifer finally opened her eyes, finding dark, deep orbs looking into her own. She instinctively pushed her legs further apart as her right hand reached out to grasp brunette locks. “I want you too,” she murmured, rubbing her lips against Lana’s._

_Lana let out a breathy moan and it was her turn to close her eyes for a few seconds. After what seemed an eternity, Jen heard that sexy voice:_

_“So take me.”_

Her heart was pounding _so_ hard against her ribcage. She couldn't believe that Lana had said that. Jennifer was actually thinking that all of this was a dream. Maybe she had passed out from the alcohol, or fell asleep after writing the fanfiction-

Slender fingers pulled the elastic band of her panties and dropped on her skin right after, causing Jennifer to gasp and realize that _none_ of this was a dream. Lana Parrilla was right in front of her, a sexy smirk on her lips and her hand under Jen’s dress. 

It was obviously _not_ a dream.

Jennifer grasped tighter on the black locks, leaning in to rub her lips against Lana’s once more. Their eyes were still locked, and Jen viewed the desire in them, shining brightly with want. She took a breathy inhale and said, “If I kiss you now, there’s no turning back.”

Lana looked down to where her hand was, under Jen’s dress, and for a moment, Jennifer thought her co-star would give up on this; push her away and leave. Instead, when Lana looked up to meet Jen’s green eyes, she viewed a seductive smile on her beautiful face.

“There’s no turning back,” Lana murmured, her voice barely a whisper.

So that was the final sign. There was no turning back. They would pursue this desire both of them had for each other and nothing would stop them. _At least Jen didn't want it to stop._

With a pleased smile, Jennifer started tracing Lana’s jawline with her mouth, nibbling on her chin to her ear, smirking at the choked whimper that escaped the brunette’s mouth. She continued with the path and reached her warm neck, attacking the skin with loving bites and kisses, encouraged by each needy little noise Lana couldn't hold in. She traced her way back to the brunette's face and almost pressed their lips together, but held herself for a moment to look into the brunette’s eyes, seeking anything that showed regret or something that would make her stop.

There was nothing of sorts. Only _sheer,_ _raw_ desire.

However, Jen decided to ask her either way because she wouldn't be able to be rejected later if Lana decided that all of this was a mistake. “Are you sure about this?” Her voice sounded breathless, afraid of the answer being an unsure nod or a simple ‘no’.

Lana’s hands rose from under Jennifer’s dress and grasped both sides of her face. “Yes,” she said without a doubt, and then leaned in, capturing Jen’s lips in a passionate kiss.

A delicious shiver ran down her spine, like a bolt of electricity. She had kissed Lana before, but nothing had felt like _this_. They were kissing fervently, longingly, a kiss that emanated desire, demanded more touches and more of _everything_. 

Lana’s tongue slid out, requesting entrance into her mouth. The blonde immediately welcomed it, both tongues twisting and sliding together, tasting the lingering taste of tequila on the other woman. 

The brunette pulled a few inches away, her forehead falling against Jen’s as her lips parted in a silent plea and her heavy breaths tickled the blonde’s face. “Take me to your bedroom,” Lana croaked, her hoarse voice causing goosebumps to appear on Jen’s body. 

Without any second thoughts, Jennifer wrapped her arms around Lana’s waist and pulled both of them from the couch, capturing her lips into another needy kiss. As their bodies came into contact, the kiss turned into a hot, wet, make out session of exploring each other’s mouth that left both women panting.

They started walking together towards the bedroom, wrapped onto each other, stumbling into some furniture on the way. Jennifer couldn't take the delay, so she pressed Lana against the wall of her corridor, pressing her body frame tighter against the other woman’s. Jen instinctively put her right knee in the middle of Lana’s thighs hearing the brunette gasp in response. With this new position, Lana’s hips started to grind against the blonde’s knee. Jen could feel her co-star’s soaked panties on her skin, wetting her knee as she grounded slowly against her, while the sexiest noises escaped her delicious mouth.

Jennifer smiled smugly, realizing how much she could feel of Lana’s arousal even though she was still only wearing jeans. Jen let out an approving chuckle and started working on Lana’s blouse buttons. She undid them quickly, watching the way the brunette’s chest heaved. When Lana’s breasts covered only with a black lacy bra came into view, Jen had to take a few seconds to absorb the sight of the beautiful, rounded boobs that she so _yearned_ to touch. Her finger crooked on one stripe, pulling to the side as her mouth attacked the olive chest, nibbling on the warm flesh, listening to Lana’s pleasurable moans. _God, that was music to her ears. Jen desired to hear those sounds forever._

Jennifer took her moment, savouring the flesh until Lana grasped her hair and pulled her mouth into a breathless kiss. “We really need to make it to your bedroom,” she said between their kiss, pushing the blonde forward so they would continue walking.

“Yeah,” Jen answered as she stumbled blindly downwards and nibbled on the brunette’s jawline at the same time.

When they finally made it to the bedroom, Lana pushed Jen forward, causing her to fall on her back onto the mattress. Jennifer completely forgot how to breathe when Lana straddled her, leaning over to capture her lips into a searing kiss while she grounded slowly against Jen’s sex still covered by her dress. Her hands instinctively reached out and grabbed Lana’s ass, pushing her down, causing her to move harder against her sex. _God, how she wished they were already naked…_

Jen decided to roll over, pushing Lana against the bed, straddling her in the process. She wanted to see Lana naked. She desperately _yearned_ to touch every single inch of her stunning body. The blonde reached around her back and unclasped her bra. When her full, uncovered breasts came into view, Jen had to stop once more to take in the sight of those magnificent boobs. _Oh, my God. Lana was definitely the most beautiful woman Jen had ever seen in her life._

“You’re so beautiful,” she said in awe. 

Lana blushed but smiled gracefully. A laugh mixed with a wanton moan escaped her throat when Jen attacked her breasts, sucking on her brownish nipples and nibbling on her skin. She alternated between both boobs, listening attentively to Lana’s moans and the feel of her hand in her hair encouraging her to keep going. Her tongue working wisely and deliciously on Lana’s breasts made Jen think of what she would do when she got the chance to taste Lana’s sex. She shivered at the thought, a little excited and a little shy. Jennifer had never been intimate like this with any other woman before. And knowing now that she would have the pleasure to do it for the first time with Lana, it made butterflies appear in her stomach as well as the insecurity of doing something the wrong way.

She pulled apart from the brunette, standing up from the bed as she felt her face heating up with shyness. Their eyes met and Jen suddenly felt intimidated by those dark orbs, eyeing her so deeply, as if she could _eat_ her only with her eyes.

The blonde chewed on her bottom lip nervously as thoughts of what she wanted to do, to make Lana feel, came to her mind. Jennifer watched her quietly, splayed on her the bed, ready for _her_ , ready for _everything_ she had to offer. Jen grinned, feeling her confidence-boosting up as she drowned herself in those dark eyes, full of luxury and _hunger._ Jen couldn't feel happier knowing that all of that was for _her_ , at least for tonight.

Right that moment, Jennifer knew exactly what she wanted to do to Lana all night long…

Her grin remained in place as she took her own dress off, standing only in her panties in front of Lana Parrilla’s hungry eyes, which gazed at her unabashedly while teeth met her bottom lip in the sexiest manner Jennifer had ever seen. 

With eagerness, Jennifer quickly undid the buttons of Lana’s jeans and started pulling the fabric down, sliding through her smooth legs, causing the latter to chuckle throatily at the blonde’s enthusiasm.

When she was done, she realized she had the perfect view of Lana’s body dressed in only black, lacy panties. To be honest, Jennifer could look at Lana Parrilla’s body for hours… _days_ , even. _She was so damn breathtaking!_

Jen crawled on the bed, hovering over the brunette and loving the way she was smiling back at her. When they were close to kissing, Lana’s teeth nibbled on Jen’s earlobe, causing the blonde to moan. Lana had just found her sensitive spot.

She listened to Lana’s chuckle in her ear and then a throaty whisper, “Touch me.”

Her whole body shivered at that sexy voice and the meaning of those words. _Fuck, she would definitely touch her._ Making Lana come had become Jennifer’s aspiration for _life_.

She pressed a wet peck on Lana’s lips and watched her closely, their eyes deep into each other’s as Jen’s hand traced a path down, scratching with her nails on the smooth, olive skin until the found her covered mound. She didn't wait any more seconds to slip her hand under the moist fabric, her fingers finding sticky wetness right after. Lana’s expression changed immediately to a silent bliss; her eyes shining brightly as gasps escaped her plump lips.

Jen flashed her a seductive smile as her fingers continued to play with her wet folds, teasing her entrance with the tip of her finger. Lana groaned loud, seeming desperate for more. The blonde was surprised when Lana used one hand to scratch her nails on her back while the other pushed Jen’s fingers against her pussy. The blonde moaned against Lana’s mouth, their ragged breathing mingling in the process. 

The hand that was on her back skimmed up and grasped her blonde locks. Jen let out a muffled moan when that devious tongue slid without warning into her mouth, exploring every inch deliciously.

The brunette pulled her away by her hair and then said breathlessly, “Fuck me.” 

Her body shivered instantaneously at the words. That was clearly what she wanted to do since _forever._

Without warning, she entered two fingers inside Lana, going deep, listening to her loud moan vibrate against her own lips. Jen felt herself entering into a world of pure bliss; pure arousal and happiness. Her fingers moved slowly, in and out, teasingly. The feeling of having Lana’s hot, wet walls clenching around her fingers was _beyond_ amazing. Jen felt like a _goddess_ , pleasuring her lover in the best ways ever. 

However, she wasn't ready to let Lana come yet. She wanted to enjoy more of her gorgeous body; she wanted to taste every inch of skin possible, torturing her with her tongue.

A disappointing moan escaped Lana’s mouth when Jen pulled her fingers out of her. But then, a positive hum left her lips as Jen’s tongue started to trace a path between her breasts and slid down to her bellybutton, going downwards slowly until it reached the waistband of her black panties. She didn't waste any more time and pulled her panties off quickly, eager to see what was waiting for her. 

She became instantly breathless with the view. She was positively amazed at how _wet_ Lana was as her bare pussy was just glistening with arousal. Her _want_ to taste her came back so she quickly leaned in, her mouth sucking on the wet folds with eagerness, thirsty to lick her all over. 

Jennifer was rather impressed with herself. She had never done this before, but she seemed to be doing the right thing because Lana was moaning so much, so _loud_ she could barely contain herself. The blonde smiled against her wetness, delighting herself in her delicious tangy taste. Lana slipped a hand into Jen’s hair, urging her in closer, silently begging for her to lick over her again and again.

“Oh God,” Lana moaned when Jen reached a sensitive spot. “This is so good, Jen, hmmm.” 

The brunette shivered against her mouth and Jen knew she was very, very close to the edge, so she stopped, listening to the second disappointed moan of the night. Jen simply _loved_ teasing.

She hovered up over Lana, a devilish smile on her lips as she leaned in and captured her lips in a searing kiss. The brunette kissed her back, very eager to taste her own juices in the blonde’s mouth. 

“Do you want more?” Jen asked when she pulled away, looking deeply into Lana’s eyes.

“Yes, Jen. Please, I need more,” the brunette begged. “I need _you_.” 

The blonde grinned. “Say it again.” 

“I need you. Please, make me come,” Lana said huskily, moaning against her lips when Jen’s fingers entered inside of her.

She thrust in and out, and then added another finger, causing the brunette to whimper; her head falling onto the mattress. Jennifer kissed her one more time and kept her lips rubbing against the brunette’s while she fucked her, the action making slight slurping sounds.

When Lana’s walls started clenching around her fingers, Jen quickened the speed, going even faster. It didn't take long for Lana to explode with pleasure. She watched in awe as Lana screamed into the mattress, body bucking wildly against Jen’s fingers. She jerked, shook, and lurched both towards and away from the probing digits, squeezing her eyes shut as wave after wave of pleasure crashed over her body. The sight of Lana having an orgasm was the most beautiful thing Jen had ever seen. 

After a while, she slowly pulled her wet fingers out of Lana, laid beside her on the bed as she waited for her aftershocks to end. The brunette turned to lay on her side and flashed Jen a satisfied smirk. She quickly pulled the blonde into a lazy kiss, their tongues meeting deliciously once again.

Lana moved her hands to Jen’s back, caressing her nakedness while she kissed her deeply, letting her tongue explore the inside of her mouth as she arched her back to feel more of every inch of Jen’s body on hers.

“I love the feeling of your body against mine,” Lana said, surprising the blonde with her confession. 

Jen could feel her heart being fulfilled with even more _feelings_ for this woman. _Shit_.

She swallowed thickly and then said, “Yeah, me too.” 

Her heart started beating uncontrollably once again when Lana started moving and settled between Jen’s legs, very close to her unmistakable wet sex. The blonde gasped, watching as Lana pulled her right leg up, holding it close to her chest and sat on her, their pussies coming in contact right after. Jennifer could barely breathe when Lana finally started to rock her hips slowly against her pussy, their wetness mingling instantly. She instinctively grasped Lana’s waist, silently asking her to move faster, to rub _harder_ against her.

Jen felt the air become thick, and it was very hard to breathe with such a good feeling taking over her body. It was _delicious;_ having their pussies together, feeling the wetness of each other, it was an _indescribable_ feeling.

Their bodies moved as one. Lana ground slowly and deliberately against Jen’s warm, wet pussy, while Jen’s hands on her ass guided her rhythm. Each small sway of Lana’s hips pushed their swollen clits against each other close to the slick heat. The sensation was _intoxicating_. The rhythm growing faster, making it harder for either of them to contain the moans and soft curses. 

As she felt her orgasm coming, she started moving faster, causing them both to moan loud. At this point she was all sweaty, her heart racing and her breathing rate increases. It wasn't long until her orgasm came, causing her to cry out loud by the amazing feeling. She felt Lana shivering above her and quickly figured she was coming undone as well. 

Her sex was pulsing, together with Lana’s and she slowed the movement with her hips, being careful with their sensitive spot. She started a slow pacing, now feeling even more wetness sticking to them. She sat up straight, her mouth seeking for Lana’s. They stopped moving and kissed each other passionately, panting in-between because of the earth-shattering orgasm. 

Lana started moving again while their eyes locked onto each other with an intensity Jennifer had never seen before. She gazed deeply into Lana’s dark orbs and, right now, she could see her co-star literally being _hers_. She was definitely lost in passion and ecstasy. Jen would swear that she saw a sparkle in Lana’s eyes, a sparkle that meant so _much_ right now… a sparkle that made Jen think her feelings for her co-star were reciprocated. 

She received one last kiss from Lana before she threw herself on the mattress beside the blonde and she tried to regain her ragged breathing. Jen’s heart was a _mess_ right now. It was bumping from the well-known post-orgasm bliss and also drowning in _doubts_. 

She heard Lana humming again, and watched as she turned on her side to look at the blonde. “That was so good,” she whispered, scooting in closer to her. “I want more of you,” she murmured in Jen’s ear with that husky voice that only she had. Jen shivered instantaneously at the words.

_Fuck, Lana was insatiable! What a goddess!_

Before Jen could say anything, she watched as Lana moved her body downwards and— _Oh, my God, she was going down on her! Fuck._

When she felt Lana’s tongue on her sex, she practically jumped as more arousal pooled between her legs. Lana was slow and then fast, gently running her tongue all the way down and then directly to her clit. She licked and flicked with her tongue and then sucked hard every inch of her pussy, causing Jen to squirm beneath her. When Lana dipped her tongue inside of Jen’s entrance, the blonde felt her whole world collapsing. She came undone, her body writhing automatically as she received all the sensations that skilled tongue caused her. 

When Lana laid on the bed again, Jen quickly embraced her, pressing their bodies tightly together. The brunette hummed approvingly and pressed a lazy kiss to Jen’s lips. 

The blonde sighed in contentment one last time before closing her eyes with Lana’s scent invading her nostrils. It was that moment, in the quietness of her own bedroom, with Lana’s warm, sweaty body pressed against her in the most romantic embrace she had ever been part of, that she realized she had been in love with Lana Parrilla for a long, long time.


	13. Phases of Being Rejected

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I hope you liked the last chapter and I hopefully think there weren't too many explicit parts lol
> 
> Enjoy this new chapter and forgive me in advance.
> 
> OBS: flashbacks are in italic.
> 
> Xoxo

**CHAPTER THIRTEEN**

**Phases of Being Rejected**

* * *

_**Jennifer's Point of View** _

**9:48 am**

Jennifer hummed happily in her sleep, the night before going through her mind as she felt relaxed and satisfied, also completely _in love_ with her co-star. Last night had been a dream. So _damn_ good. Jen was sure she would replay that night in her mind for the longest of days. Her happiness _almost_ dismissed an annoying headache from last night. Just _almost._ Jennifer wanted to fall back to sleep, but she also missed kissing Lana Parrilla. 

With a lazy smile, she rolled over on her side, stretching her arm out in search for a body to wrap around, one that launched her into ecstasy time and time again only a handful of hours ago. However, her arm reached into empty space, nothing but cold sheets and blankets. Her smile faded and she quickly opened her eyes. Lana wasn’t there.

“Oh no,” she muttered, looking wide-eyed at the white sheets, feeling the emptiness by her side. “Fuck, no!” She screamed in anger and slapped her hand on the bed. She looked around the bedroom and there was no sight of Lana Parrilla.

She stood up completely naked and started running to the other rooms of her house, searching with desperation for Lana. Maybe she was just pranking her.

However, it wasn't like those romantic movies that the person never left and instead brought you breakfast in bed. Jennifer’s situation wasn't close to that at all because Lana was _gone_.

* * *

 

**_Lana's Point of View_ **

**7:20 am**

Her body was so relaxed and the only thing she wanted was to dive into more of that delicious body that had provided such pleasurable moments for her last night. It was an awesome sensation that she wanted to feel _every single day._ Her body involuntarily searched for the warmth that she was previously clung to and finally felt the bare, smooth skin on hers again. She hummed in content and smiled with her eyes closed, just to savour the sensation.

Lana leaned even closer, her nose finding its comfort in between long curls, which smelled great shampoo scent and she hummed pleasantly once again, already feeling the throb between her legs awake. Another couple of rounds of _orgasms_ would be amazing right now.

She bit her lips, realizing how swollen they still were from last night’s activities. However, that didn't stop her from leaning in and kissing the exposed, smooth skin of the woman’s back.

She heard a soft moan, and smiled against the skin, sliding her lips upwards to face the blonde. She wasn't awake yet, so Lana had a while to observe her beautiful face. Her hand found its way to her hair where she caressed the soft locks longingly for a while. 

The sound of a cellphone buzzing on the bedside table brought her out of her quiet longing, and she reached for the device, realizing only later that it was hers. The name Fred attached to an emoji of a red heart was flashing on the screen with a new message, which caused her heart to clench painfully inside her chest.

_Fred. Alfredo. Her husband._

**Fred: _Just arrived at the airport in Vancouver. I’m heading home now. See you later, babe._**

Lana read those words a hundred times, feeling her heart hurt immensely at each of them. She gripped the cellphone tightly, wanting it to be destroyed and just disappear as much as she didn't want this message existing. Some part of her wanted last night to come back, to start all over again.

She sighed, trying to take deep breaths. She put her cellphone back on the bedside table and turned to face the ceiling. Her heart was pounding so loudly against her ribcage; her heart was hurting, the knowing pang of guilt getting to her and _hurting, hurting, hurting._

Lana closed her eyes for a moment, wanting all of her problems and feelings to disappear. Instead, she was rewarded with the memories of last night:

_“Have you ever been with a woman, Jennifer Morrison?”_

_“Uh, not exactly. You were the first woman I’ve ever kissed.”_

Lana had been surprised, but beyond pleased at the news. She simply loved to know that she had been the first woman Jennifer had ever kissed.

The song _Madness_ started playing in her mind, as she dived into the memories of the moment they danced together:

_“Why are you standing still? Why don’t you dance with me? Do you want to dance with me, Jennifer?”_

_Hands circled around a neck and waist. The beat, the swaying of their hips, the heat radiating between their bodies, their ragged, short breaths mingling as their faces leaned so, so close. A lot of grinding, and warm hands holding her body close, desperately seeking friction while they danced, moved together as if nothing else mattered in the world besides them._

Lana exhaled and looked at the side to face Jennifer, who was still sleeping peacefully and very _unaware_ of the brunette’s conflict happening right beside her. She smiled sadly, turning her head again to glare at the ceiling. More memories invaded her mind and she realized she was weak enough to fight against it.

_“You think my body is stunning?”_

_“Emma does.”_

_“I didn't ask if Emma does. I asked if you do.”_

_“Yes, I do think your body is stunning. You’re… amazing, Lana.”_

The fact that Jennifer Morrison thought of Lana the same way she did of Jennifer made her feel so, so happy, wanted and _hopeful_.

_“I want you, Jennifer. I want to feel you. How can you not see?”_

_Tentative touches, smooth skin on her fingers, wet discoveries, breathy gasps and mingling breaths._

_“Lana.”_

_“Yes?”_

_“I want you too.”_

_“So take me.”_

Releasing a sigh, Lana almost jumped when a hand touched her bare breasts and traced a path downwards to her lower stomach. Jennifer’s touch burned on her skin, making her _crave_ for her so badly… which was a _terrible_ thing. 

_“If I kiss you now, there’s no turning back.”_

_“There’s no turning back.”_

_Loving bites and kisses on her neck, needy little noises being escaped._

_“Are you sure about this?”_

_“Yes.”_

Lana had never been so sure of anything else in her whole life. Being with Jennifer was what she wanted, and _nothing_ or _no one_ would have stopped her last night when the chance was given. She hadn't thought about her husband from the moment she arrived at Jennifer’s house. She had forgotten about him completely while her attention was all drawn to Jennifer Morrison and her beautiful smile.

_A fervent, passionate kiss started, causing her body to shiver with the intensity. She had never been kissed like that before._

_“Take me to your bedroom.”_

_Delicious touches on hidden places, hand between legs and no shame of anything. Clothes on the floor, bruises on the skin, kisses deepening, sensations not felt for so long…_

_There was passion, so much touching, and ecstasy, driving her body crazy as well as her mind._

_She was finally hers for one night._

Jennifer shifted beside her as Lana came out of her reverie and realized she could stay no more. This loving bubble they had created yesterday had to end right _now_ because it was surely a _terrible, terrible_ thing to do. 

She wanted to cry so bad. There was _guilt_ everywhere around her and she couldn't take this anymore. The guilt was _killing_ her. She _had_ to leave. It was over.

She stood up carefully from the bed and started walking around the house to find her clothes. She got dressed quickly and grabbed all her things. Before leaving, she couldn't control her own feet as it led her to Jennifer’s bedroom one last time. The blonde was splayed in the bed, under the covers, just like when Lana had left her. 

Her heart was breaking in tiny little pieces as she reluctantly took a few steps back, slowly leaving this incredible but horrible _bubble_. 

It was over.

It had to be.

* * *

 

&

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

**Day One: Sadness**

The rest of the Sunday, also known as the worst day of her life, was used for sleeping until the next morning. Jennifer didn't want to eat or talk or do anything. She just wanted to sleep until she _died_. Well, not _precisely_. She didn't want to die. She just wanted to get Lana out of her mind and her amazing scent of her body.

Before falling to bed, Jen had taken a long shower and changed her bedsheets before going to sleep. However, Lana’s scent seemed to be _impregnated_ on her body. Her sweet fragrance would be forever in Jen’s mind and she didn't know how to get rid of it. What had made her happy last night, now only made her extremely sad.

When the sun shone through the curtains and woke her up, she became angry at it for doing such thing. She simply wasn't ready to face life again. With a loud groan, Jennifer grabbed her cellphone and called Adam to tell him she was sick, so she didn't have to go to work. Well, that wasn't a _lie_. She felt sick. Sick of _love_ and _rejection_. Sick of not being chosen by who she wanted. And that was the worst feeling ever.

She decided to get out of bed a few hours later but chose to keep her pyjamas on. Ava followed her eagerly, already plenty energized and ready to play. But, unfortunately, she wasn't in the mood for playing with her puppy today. _Not at all._

Jennifer hadn't cried yet. It was a hard task to complete, but she was doing well so far. She considered herself a tough woman and crying over another woman was something she wouldn't let herself do. Especially because it was her co-star Lana Parrilla, who was married to a _man_. Jennifer had to be strong and face this shit that was becoming her love life with her head up.

She laid on the couch and Ava quickly snuggled her up. She embraced her puppy and turned on the TV. She tried really hard to pay attention to what was going on the screen, but her mind always found a way to come back to Lana and her decisions.

Jennifer could accept that Lana might not feel the way she feels for her, but why would she do such a thing? Why would she leave Jennifer with no explanations? If their night had been a mistake, maybe she should just tell Jen. It was simple, wasn't it? Jennifer could _definitely_ take Lana saying the truth right to her face.

* * *

 

**Day Two: Fear of being exposed**

On Tuesday, Jennifer still felt really sad about everything. She had cried eventually the night before, but she quickly stopped because she couldn't do such a thing to herself. It was too much. It was very _shameful_ , actually. She was really ashamed of herself.

So today, she really wanted to call off work again, but obviously, she couldn't do that. She couldn't avoid work just because of a _woman_. A woman that she was _in love_ with and who broke her heart with no regrets.

Jennifer quickly got dressed and drove to the set. Her face wasn't one of the best so she tried to cover it with light makeup. She had checked the script and thankfully didn't have any scene with Lana today. She never felt so _relieved_. 

When she arrived on set, Jen noticed that a lot of people were looking at her. Was she that _wrecked?_ They also waved at her and said, “I’m glad you’re okay,” and, “Good to see you here, Jen.”

When Ginny saw her, she approached her with a worried look and Jennifer felt a slight pang in her stomach that maybe everything she was feeling was exposed to _everyone_.

“Hey Jen, are you okay?”

“Yes, why wouldn't I be?” She retorted harshly. 

“Well, I heard you were sick yesterday. Adam told everyone, but he didn't say what you had. Josh and I were worried about you,” she caressed Jen’s arm maternally. Jen loved Ginny so much. The brunette always acted like a real mom around her and was very helpful whenever Jen needed her.

“Oh, I’m… okay. It was just a cold,” she fake-smiled and the brunette arched an eyebrow.

“Are you sure? Isn't there anything you want to tell me? I’m sorry, but you look bad. A cold doesn't make you look like this. Unless you’re lying to me and instead you have a worse cold! Jennifer Morrison, tell me what you have right now!”

Okay, Ginny could quickly change her personality to very-cute to very-maternal-worried-fake-mother.

Jen smiled, this time a real smile. “I’m really okay, don’t worry. And I missed you,” she pulled the brunette into a tight hug. She had to hold back tears when Ginny hugged her back just as tight.

Jennifer wished she could tell Ginny about her _problem_ , but now she just didn't want to be exposed, or anyone to know the _real_ problem. She wasn't ready yet. Maybe later, when things got even worse, she would tell her friend.

**Day Three: Confidence**

On Wednesday, Jennifer had to do a small scene with Lana. She started feeling really nervous about it, but she told herself that it was stupidity. She was not that kind of woman. Jennifer cannot be nervous of facing the woman she’s in love with and who… _rejected_ her. Okay, that’s a little bit cruel. She shouldn't think like that. She was bringing the worst of herself by thinking like that. She had to be confident and act like she always did when she tried to hide something. She had to be _indifferent_. She had to act like nothing was bothering her. She had to be _insensitive_. She had to be the professional she had always been. 

And that’s what she would do.

When Jennifer arrived at the set, the first person she saw (unfortunately, and wasn't prepared) was Lana. She fought against the urge to turn back and run away from the way her heart _hurt_ at seeing her. It brought back so many _emotions_ and _sensations_. _Shit, this was so fucked up._

Thankfully, they were far away from each other and Jen only looked at Lana for five-seconds, and then walked by her, not too close, yet not too far, and that was it. For the brief seconds that Jen had looked at her co-star, she noticed that Lana had an indecipherable expression on her face. Forgetting about the whole moment entirely, she entered her trailer and suddenly felt safe again. Safe from those beautiful brown eyes. Safe from that stunning body. Safe from the woman who broke her heart.

Twenty minutes later, when Jen’s heart had calmed a bit from the insanely pounding, she finally went to the area where the scene would take place. It was a scene with Ginny, Josh, Jared, and Lana. The well-known Swan-Mills Family. 

All of them were already on the scene, waiting for orders. Jen walked past Lana, not sparing a single _glance_ at her, and walked to her where her fictional dad was. She kept her mind focused on what she had to do and started talking to Josh about the script. She glanced quickly at the side where Lana previously was standing and realized that she had moved to sit beside Ginny on a bench glued to the wall. Lana didn't seem happy, and that intrigued Jennifer to no end. However, she had to concentrate on what she was here to do and decided she would no longer look at her co-star if it wasn't just _extremely_ necessary.

When they started filming the scene, Jen acted as much professionally as she could, as well as Lana. They had lines together, and it worked incredibly perfect as it always did. They didn't talk after they finished or even looked at each other anymore. After that, a curious Ginnifer walked towards her and asked if she was feeling okay again.

“Yes, I am fine, _Mom_ ,” she emphasized the word, causing Ginny to giggle. “You don’t need to worry about me. I’m a grown up now, I swear!”

“Okay, okay, honey. I’m just… you know… I always notice things, so I noticed that you and Lana are not talking to each other.”

Shit.

Her heart started beating uncontrollably at those words. _Shit_. How could Ginny read her so well?

“Jen?”

“Yes?” she asked, still wide-eyed about the affirmation of her friend.

“Are you okay? Are you and Lana talking to each other or not?”

“Why would you ask that? Of course we are. We’re… you know… friends,” she swallowed dry. 

“You two don’t seem like you’re talking. Did something happen?” Jen quickly shook her head. “I tried to talk to her and I even made some jokes, but she seemed sad and didn't laugh like she always does. And she didn't tell me why. I’m intrigued,” the brunette continued.

“I see,” Jen nodded and shifted uncomfortably under Ginny’s intense scrutiny. “Well, I don’t know anything about it.”

“Alright. Let’s just hope she gets happier.”

“Yeah,” Jen mumbled before waving goodbye to Ginny and heading to her trailer.

After that intriguing conversation, Jen laid on the couch and breathed in and out as if she hasn't being doing this since forever. So, apparently, Lana seemed sad… Why’s that? Did she regret what she did with Jennifer? No, no. It can’t be that. She didn't care about Jennifer. She had a husband. 

_Fuck_.

* * *

 

**Day Four: Angry**

Among all days of her previous suffering, today was the _weirdest_. She was feeling _angry_. Angry that Lana had rejected her and left with no explanations. Angry that the woman didn’t love her back. Angry at _herself_ because she couldn’t wait to be with her co-star again even though the latter had made her feel the _worst feelings ever_ after all that rejection _._

Jennifer woke up wanting to snap at anyone that appeared in front of her. But she quickly sent this thought away because obviously, she couldn't do that. She’s a nice person. _Period_. Well, should she be a nice person to Lana? No way, right? The woman practically crushed her heart figuratively with her own hands! She didn't deserve Jen to be nice, right?

The reason Jen was thinking about how she should treat Lana was that today they have a bigger scene together. They would have to talk and interact before filming. And that was not good for her right now.

However, as weird as it seemed, when Jen was angry she felt slightly more confident than with the other emotions. And with confidence in her mind, she could talk and be even more professional with her co-star.

Later that afternoon, when it was finally time to start filming, Lana saw Lana in a corner reading her script and walked towards her with confidence and a whole load of _indifference_ on her face.

“Lana, can I talk to you for a minute?”

The brunette looked up quickly when she heard her voice, and there was some surprise in her eyes. But Jen just kept it professional.

“Uh, y-yes.”

Jen also noticed that Lana was uncomfortable with her presence, and that made her feel slightly better. At least that she could do. “What do you think we should do in this scene? I asked Adam, but he said that I had to solve it with you,” she explained, pointing the script in her hands.

“I think we should just,” the brunette swallowed. “Improvise and it’ll all work fine.”

“Is that all?” Jen asked, feeling confused by the brunette’s behaviour. _Classic Lana_ would give a lot of ideas in a scene like this.

“Yes,” she muttered breathlessly and the blonde almost didn't hear it.

“Fine, thanks.”

And she left. _With no explanations._ Well, actually Lana didn't need one, right? Jen was just trying to feel even.

Later, when they were filming the scene, Jen improvised as well as Lana with and it all worked fine like the brunette had said. At night, the crew brought a cake to the set because it was Colin’s birthday. Everyone was there, celebrating with him. Jen filmed her friend and took a lot of pictures of him, avoiding eye contact with Lana who kept looking intently at her, which made the blonde feel _very_ uncomfortable. 

A few minutes later, she posted a picture on her Instagram and on Twitter of her and Colin together. A blurred, but a happy picture she had taken a few months ago with him on her phone. She stopped for a moment to think about the caption and nothing but happy birthday came to her mind. She quickly glanced at Lana and all the _angriness_ she was feeling before came back again. She felt like provoking her co-star in some way, and suddenly, the best idea came to her mind. She wrote the exact words on her pic with Colin: 

_HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my TV Soulmate!_

She knew she would make the Swens sad and hopeless about this, but all she wanted to do now was to _provoke_ Lana Parrilla. And she knew she would achieve her goal because there’s no one else who ships SwanQueen more than Lana Parrilla.

After posting the picture, she turned her cellphone off because she didn't want to see the sad comments from the Swens on the photo. She wanted to see her _co-star_ sad about it! And Jen hoped, from the deep within her soul, that Lana had been _at_ _least_ a little mad about Jennifer sponsoring CaptainSwan.

Later at night, when Jen was laying in bed snuggled with Ava by her side, she felt really sad again. Her angriness had vanished long ago and now she only felt _sad_. She remembered all the fun she and Lana had together during the rehearsals and scenes. She remembered how drunk and aroused they got after drinking together… And remembered how their pleasurable night had been. Clearly the best night she’s ever had. Clearly the best person she’s ever been with. Clearly the worst _morning after_ of her life.

All of that made Jen cry again. Well, she wasn't strong enough anymore. She had to cry for real at least once. She had to cry because her heart was in pain, and all she wanted was to be with Lana. 

So she cried, and cried, and sobbed and soaked her pillow. She heard Ava whine and snuggle against her neck, seeming worried about her owner. Jen could only cry more, and feel lonely in this big house she bought to be comfortable. She was feeling everything _but_ comfortable. She has never been heartbroken like this before. And it hurt really bad.

* * *

 

**Day Five: What the fuck?**

When Jennifer arrived at the set, she went straight to her trailer to wait for Ginny. The brunette wanted to run over lines and talk to Jen about some other things. It was 9 am in the morning and the blonde wasn't ready to talk to Ginny about Lana again. Her friend was always very curious when the subject was about Lana and Jennifer. And the blonde just didn't know why. Did Ginny know something? No, of course not.

They had scheduled to run over lives at 9:30, so Jen could take a nap before her friend arrived. When she laid her head on the soft cushion, her door was opened and she quickly jumped in surprise.

An angry Lana walked in with furious steps and only stopped when she was right in front of Jennifer. 

“How could you?” Lana asked sharply, her eyes showing how furious she was.

Jen was still trying to find her composure at having Lana so suddenly close to her. “What?” She asked breathlessly.

“The caption of your photo with Colin! _How. Could. You?”_

Jennifer huffed, not believing in what she was hearing. “Are you really saying this or I’m just imagining things?” She shot back coldly while crossing her arms defensively over her chest.

“You- I-” Lana stuttered nervously. “ _I_ am your TV Soulmate, not him!”

Jen arched her eyebrows at that answer. She wasn't expecting for that at all. Of course Lana would be mad at the caption, but the blonde didn't think she would be _that_ mad.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Jen shook her head, averting her eyes from Lana. “I can’t believe you came to my trailer to say this bullshit. I just can’t.”

“Our fans are hopeless again, Jen! And that’s because of _you_. Instead of supporting our ship, you support _yours_. I always knew that you didn't care about SwanQueen like I do.” 

This time, it was Lana who looked away. She seemed really sad about the situation Jen had caused… which _infuriated_ the blonde on a high level that she wasn't able to control. All the anger she was feeling the day before came back to her again on full force. She wanted to snap at Lana, and nothing would make her stop. Jennifer couldn't believe that after what Lana did to her, she still had the courage to come to her trailer and say those stupid things about ships and practically _blame_ her of everything.

“Are you out of your _mind_ , Lana Parrilla?” Jen asked sharply. “I mean, can you even _listen_ to yourself?” The brunette swallowed dry as Jen continued. “I can’t believe that you came here to complain about the fucking caption I chose to use on a photo of _my_ Instagram. Who do you think you are? Seriously,” Jen huffed in disbelief and saw Lana opening her mouth to speak, but she lifted her finger, stopping the brunette. “No, you don’t get to speak right now. You get to listen to me. Look, Lana, you cannot come into my trailer like this as if you were the owner. You don’t get to blame me because of this bullshit. I’m the one who should be asking you questions! I’m the one who should ask ‘How could you?’. So answer me now: how could you do that to me? How could you act like that after the night we had together? It didn't mean anything to you at all? That’s why you left me alone with no explanations?”

Jen stopped talking for a second to breathe and studied her co-star’s expression. She looked like she wanted to cry. All of a sudden, her eyes were full of tears and she hid her face in between her hands.

“No,” she muttered so low Jen could barely catch it.

“No _what?”_ Jen asked angrily, approaching the brunette with tentative steps. “Do you even know what you caused me?” The blonde felt her own tears coming, and she fought them hard, not wanting to show weakness. “Do you think it’s fair to me what you did after everything we’ve been through these past months?” Jen sniffled, not being able to prevent the hurtful tears from sliding down on her face.

Lana wiped her own tears and put her hands away, gazing at Jennifer with a pained expression. “No, it’s not fair.” 

They spent a moment in silence, both of them looking at each other, waiting for one of them to continue speaking.

“That’s all you’re gonna say? _It’s not fair?”_ Jen snapped. “I know it’s not fair! The problem is that I can’t stop thinking about what happened. I just…can’t move on… _fuck_ ,” she turned to the opposite side so Lana wouldn't see her drowning in tears and pain.

Jen felt steps behind her and stayed put, not wanting to show any more weakness. 

“Jen, look at me.”

“No,” she quickly denied.

“Do you have feelings for me?”

_Oh no, fuck no!_ Lana didn't have the right to ask her something like that.

“Do you?” She heard the husky voice again, now very close to her ear.

_Seriously, what did she do to deserve this?_

“No,” she answered with no conviction in her voice and mentally slapped herself.

“Tell me the truth.”

She turned again and saw Lana’s watering eyes. “You don’t deserve the truth,” Lana’s eyes watered as more tears slid down on her face. Jennifer watched her co-star, and she seemed to be in so much pain just like Jen was. It hurt her, even more, to see her co-star crying. Long seconds after, she couldn't help and to just burst out loud, “I do!”

“You do?”

“Ye-yes. I do have feelings for you. I didn't want to, but I couldn't help it. It just…happened.”

Jennifer watched as a mix of emotions passed through Lana’s eyes. When she thought the brunette would just leave and forget Jen existed, she became rather surprised. 

“God, I’m so screwed,” Lana mumbled, and in a flash, she grasped Jen’s face and crashed their lips together in a passionate kiss. 

Jen was really, really surprised at this, but then she just enjoyed the sensation of having Lana back in her arms again. 

Too bad it didn't last long, though.

The door banged open again and Lana quickly pulled herself away from Jennifer. Two startled women gazed at their intruder whose name was Ginnifer Goodwin, who had her mouth wide open and a bewildered expression on her face.

The three of them stayed petrified, rooted to their spot for a few minutes until Lana was the first to move. She walked away from Jen’s trailer and didn't say a word before leaving. 

Lana left again with no fucking explanations! She left like Jen’s feelings didn't matter _at all_ to her.

“Fuck, not again,” Jennifer fell on the couch as a compulsive sob escaped her throat.


	14. Lola And Ava

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I posted earlier on this Sunday, finally! Thank you so much for reading, everyone! You make me really happy when you tell me what you think. Xoxo
> 
> Enjoy the insanity!

**CHAPTER FOURTEEN**

**Lola and Ava**

* * *

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

Lana had stormed out on her, left her trailer again and Jen didn't even bother to go after her. It wouldn't change anything if she did. Now she had another thing to deal with. Ginny was gaping at her with wide-eyes and there was a light blush on her face. If Ginny hadn't interrupted the kiss, Jen didn't know what would have happened. The blonde wiped her tears away and faced her co-star with a pained expression.

The pixie-haired woman cleared her throat and straightened her shoulders. Jen just sighed, feeling the weight of all this _mess_ on her back. She was hurting, and there was no one to comfort her. Now that Ginny probably had a hundred questions to ask her due to the scene she had just witnessed, Jennifer decided it was a good idea to tell her for once and for all.

“Can you sit with me, please?” She asked in a small voice, watching as Ginny nodded in response and walked towards her to sit on the couch.

“Are you okay?”

“Not so much. I guess you…you know why.”

“Not exactly,” Ginny smiled weakly and grasped Jen’s hands. “Would you like to tell me?”

“Yes, I…I would like to. But please, don’t judge me,” she pleaded quietly.

“I wouldn’t. I’m just here to hear you and comfort you if I can.”

Jen smiled as another tear slipped down on her cheek. “Thanks,” she took a deep breath and then continued, “Lana and I…we-we got together for a few nights and…uh, had sex once.”

“Oh,” the brunette muttered quietly, and squeezed Jen’s hand, encouraging her to continue.

“We’ve been rehearsing some scenes, reading fanfictions together and…kissing each other…a _lot_.”

Ginny swallowed and then asked, “Since when have you been…uh, these things have been happening?”

“Since the day Adam and Eddy told us about SwanQueen. You know, we had to kiss and rehearse the love scenes, which I remember it was kind of _your_ idea,” Jen tried to glare at her friend, but couldn't do it. It wasn't her fault that all of this had happened. 

Ginny sighed and then said, “I don’t know if I should say that I’m sorry, Jen. You two have been avoiding each other even before you knew SwanQueen was going to happen. And after you started…you know, _hanging out,_ I kind of noticed the way you talked and looked at each other. I’m not _blind_.”

Jen frowned. “What do you mean the way we _look_ at each other?”

“There’s always that look of longing when you look at each other. I can see the way you feel when she touches you, even though it’s a simple touch such as hand brushing.”

Jennifer lowered her head, thinking about all of this and how fucking _true_ it was. Except for the fact that maybe Ginny was all wrong about how Lana looked at her. There was no longing in her eyes. Was there?

“I kind of realized that was something more happening between you two because of that. Sometimes is just…right on your faces.”

“Does she look at me the way I…I look at her?” Jen asked quietly. She was afraid of the answer, even though she already knew it fully. Lana didn't like her or…whatever. She had stormed out on her twice now, even if she was the one to start the kiss.

“Yes, Jen. She does. There’s so much passion and fondness in her eyes… It just… _shines_ when she looks at you.”

Jennifer frowned again, finding all of this hard to believe. “I don’t think it makes sense. Lana doesn't like me the way I like her.”

“Oh, Jen,” the brunette sighed. “You don’t see it, do you?” Jen shook her head. “Of _course_ she has feelings for you, sweetheart. It’s right on her face. Although she is really more effective at hiding her feelings than you are, I still could read her emotions.”

Jen let go of Ginny’s hands and stood up, starting to pace the small space of her trailer. “You can’t be serious, Ginny. This is _crazy_. If she had feelings for me and… _looks_ at me like you’re saying, she wouldn't have left my house after we had sex. It was so bad, you know? It seemed like she didn't even care about me. It still does.”

Ginny also stood up to face the blonde. “Have you thought about _Lana’s_ reasons for doing that to you or you just have been whining at yourself in the mirror?” 

Jen stopped pacing the room and thought about it, remembering what she had been through the past week. 

“She has a _husband_ , Jennifer.” 

The blonde snorted, hating this word even more now. “Don’t you think I know that?!”

“Yeah, but maybe that’s why she did it. She left your house because she felt guilty or something, but that doesn't mean she doesn't have feelings for you. She wouldn't have had sex with you in the first place if she didn't _feel_ something,” the brunette paused for a few seconds while she watched Jen attentively. “Pay attention, Jen. If you’re in love with her, you have to fight for your love. You can’t just give up.”

Her heart was beating so uncontrollably at the word _love._ It was so hard not to freak out over this new sentiment. And the fact that Ginnifer already knew how she felt for Lana just made it clear that she couldn't hide her expressions the way she thought she could.

“How do you know I’m in love with her?” She asked, her voice wavering.

“I told you, I can see that way you look at her and how she looks back at you. I know how love looks and feels like because I’ve been down this road before.”

Jennifer gulped, unable to control her crazy beating heart. Shit. How could she ever believe that Lana felt the same when all she had done was run away from Jen?

“Oh, honey, come here,” Ginny must have noticed her pained expression because she just pulled Jen into a tight hug, comforting her instantly. “Everything is going to be okay, sweetie. If you love them, and they love you, they will always find you.”

Jen chuckled dryly as another tear slipped down on her cheek. “Did you just quote your character?” 

“Yes, I did. And I know it’s very helpful,” the pixie-haired woman grinned as she caressed Jen’s blonde locks fondly.

* * *

 

&

On Saturday morning, Jennifer had woken up a lot better. She felt lighter due to the day before. Lana had stormed out on her with no explanations again, but the good part was that she had to tell everything to Ginny and she felt much better after that. She wasn't sure if what the brunette had said made some sense, but Jen just knew that she had to forget about all this mess and focus on something else.

The weather outside was the worst possible, so Jennifer had to stay inside today. She wanted to go jogging, but that wasn't an option. She settled for having a light breakfast and came back to bed to continue reading a book she had forgotten she had. Those hours of reading passed like a flash, and suddenly it was time for lunch already. Jen ordered Thai food and enjoyed the deliciousness in her couch while she watched a random movie on Netflix. When she got tired of that, it was already night. These days where she stayed at home doing nothing productive were _rare_. She always reads, yes, but not so many hours in a row. She felt no kind of passion and no inspirational thoughts to create something. She felt _drained_. Lana had sucked all of her energy, physical and emotional.

Jennifer took deep breaths and faced the ceiling. This wasn't herself. She couldn't continue being this lazy person, suffering in the silence of her own home because she was heartbroken. Pining over someone, because of _love,_ wasn’t something she was used to doing. This had to stop.

The blonde stood up quickly and put her workout clothes on. She wasn't going to continue acting like a lazy _teenager_. She had to at least workout inside today since she couldn't jog outside. The treadmill would do.

Jen tried to focus on the hill challenge on the treadmill, forcing her mind to stay away from a beautiful brunette. However, it was a very hard task. She kept thinking about everything Ginny had said, and if it could be true. She actually felt a bit hopeful about that conversation. _What if Lana really felt something for her?_

She shook her head, sending those thoughts away and focused on her hill challenge on the treadmill. After thirty minutes, Jennifer completed her challenge for the day and realized she was even a bit sweaty even though it was cold. She was drinking her second glass of water when she heard the bell. She huffed in annoyance for being interrupted and was in no mood to talk to the mailman. She _hated_ when he came during the night.

Jen opened the door expecting to see the boring face of the mailman, but instead, her face contorted from a pissed expression to a surprised one. What was Lana Parrilla doing at her door at seven at night?

“Hi!” The brunette greeted sheepishly with a smile.

“Uh, hello,” Jen said awkwardly.

“I…I brought Lola to play with Ava.”

Jen was startled to see Lana there. She could barely hear what the woman was saying.

“Wh-what-” she was interrupted when Lola jumped with her paws on Jen’s stomach and barked happily to see her. She really hadn't noticed that the dog was there. “Hey Lola,” Jen caressed the dog’s head and looked at Lana, frowning and making a look that demanded a better explanation.

“Sorry, am I interrupting something?” Jen shook her head, not being able to mutter anything coherent in response. “May I come in?” She gulped loudly and then nodded, moving from the door to let Lana and Lola enter.

“What are you- uh,” she cleared her throat before continuing, “What are you doing here?”

“I brought Lola to play with Ava,” Lana shrugged and took a few steps closer to Jen. The blonde watched as Lana licked her lips and stared fixedly at her sweaty body. _Oh, my God. Why was she looking at Jen like that?_

Jen looked behind her shoulder when she heard a bark and the scene she saw was very cute and funny: Ava jumped on Lola playfully and they started chasing each other around the house. In that moment, Jen caught herself wishing that her life was as simple as a dog’s.

“You…you were working out?” Lana asked, leaning in closer.

“Yes,” Jen muttered breathlessly because of their proximity.

She gasped when Lana's hands touched her shoulders gently and slid down to her arms. Her brown eyes were dark, full of desire and want. Jennifer couldn't speak or do anything besides watching her co-star and letting the feeling of the brunette's hands on her skin linger. 

“It’s just…so _hard_ to keep my hands to myself.”

A small groan escaped her mouth and she cursed herself mentally at how weak she was. Lana had just arrived and she was already in control of Jennifer. _Why she had to be so vulnerable?_

Lana’s fingers touched Jen’s lips, and it was only a matter of seconds before _both_ of them leaned in and started a kiss. When their tongues met, the blonde moaned again with the amazing taste. She obviously wouldn't survive without those lips anymore. They were too _good_. 

Jennifer really wanted to push Lana on the couch and make love to her right there, but she also remembered that their situation wasn't solved yet. They were in _need_ to have a conversation in which there were no interruptions nor desperate kisses. Why was Lana in her house if she had walked out on her the day before? Jen had exposed her feelings to her and yet, she ran away. She couldn't just give in like this and be alone on the morning after again.

“Lana, s-stop,” she pulled away, watching as the brunette started chewing on her bottom lip and looked away with a pained expression. “We need to talk.”

“I know,” she breathed out a tired sigh.

“Let's sit,” Jen said, pulling Lana with her to sit on the couch. “First of all, why are you here right now? Because I’m really confused.”

“Jen, isn't it clear for you what I'm doing here?”

“Well, after you stormed out twice on me, and that happened after we had sex _or_ kissed, I assume you’re here for that again.”

“What?” Lana rose from the couch, her voice showing incredulity. “Do you think I came here just for _sex?”_

“It seems like it, and-”

“Oh, you’ve got to be _kidding_ me! Jen, you have to understand that-”

“No, Lana,” Jen also stood up to be face to face with her co-star. Now she was also angry as Lana seemed to be with Jen’s _assumption_. “ _You_ have to understand that I'm not a toy that you can play with and then throw away. You're playing with my feelings and it seems that you don't even _care_ about it. I know that you are married, but you can't tease me, have sex with me, and then leave. You are _hurting_ me.”

“Jen, I didn't mean to hurt you, and it's complicated-”

“You didn't mean to? Oh, really? Because you could have talked to me the morning after if what we did had been a mistake for you. Or even the other days at the set that you _avoided_ me. And I know it's complicated, but you didn't have the right to leave me with no explanations,” Jen took a deep breath and stared at Lana, who had her hands on her waist and a blank expression on her face.

“Are you done?” Lana asked, sarcasm in her voice.

“Oh, you want more? Because I can list all the things we’ve done this past months and nothing makes sense at all after what you did. I never thought-”

“That's enough, Jennifer,” the brunette took a deep breath and continued, “I didn't stay…or talked to you the morning after because I…I felt _guilty_. I am married, but when I'm with _you_ , I forget about that. When I'm with you, Jennifer, the whole thing changes,” she paused to breathe, and Jen just swallowed the lump in her throat. “I know I've been avoiding you these days, but that’s because I was thinking of what to do! This is so… _complicated_. Especially when my mind tells me to stay away, that all of this is a horrible thing to do, but…but my body…God, my body _craves_ for you,” she snorted at her own words and started pacing in the living room. “And my heart…my _heart_ is in desperate need to _have_ _you_ all…all the time,” Lana stammered and the blonde could only stare at her while her own heart pounded crazily inside her chest. She didn't know what to say. She didn't know if everything Lana was telling her didn't happen to be a _dream_.

“I know I am… _married,”_ the brunette said quietly. “Do I love my husband? Yes, I do, but…what I feel for him is not close enough to what I feel for _you_ ,” Jen's eyes widened and she started finding hard to breathe. “I just…never felt this way with him. With you, it’s so…so _different_. Everything we do together makes me happy; your _presence_ makes me happy,” she stressed. “And I…I love kissing you, _touching_ you.” 

Lana approached with careful steps. Her hand found Jen’s jawline and she traced the skin slowly with her thumb. Jen thought she would continue to do so, but instead, she pulled away and sat on the couch again, covering her face with her hands, looking very conflicted.

After what seemed to last a lifetime _,_ her co-star continued, “I’m sorry if I left you after our night together, but I…I couldn't figure it out what I was doing. Everything I could think of was how much I loved spending the night with you and…and how _horrible_ I am,” Jennifer couldn't help herself and sat beside Lana on the couch, reaching out for her hand tentatively. Lana lifted her head to look at her and there were tears in her eyes. “I can’t help wanting you, Jennifer. And this _kills_ me because I know I can't have this if I'm married, but I can't control it. It’s…it’s way stronger than me.” 

They were both looking down at their hands, that had automatically found a way to intertwine their fingers. Jen stared at their hands for long minutes, simply _loving_ how it felt and how it looked together. Lana’s fingers were tracing small patterns on her skin, causing her body to shiver slightly at the contact.

“I…I can’t believe you like me that way,” Jen said quietly, still not able to look up and meet the brown, piercing eyes. She wasn't expecting to receive that kind of _explanation_. She didn't imagine _at all_ that Lana felt something for her. She couldn't believe that Ginny was right about everything.

“I do, I really do like you. I can’t believe you haven't noticed before,” Lana let out a dry chuckle. “I mean, what do you think all that _Playing SwanQueen_ idea was about?”

Jen grinned and finally looked up. When their eyes met, she saw everything Ginny had described to her yesterday. As she stared, she could feel herself become hypnotized by the way Lana’s eyes shined brightly with an intensity she had never seen before. Lana smiled and spots of gold danced in her irises and grew to swallow the dark. Jen could see longing, desire, passion; her eyes held all those deep seated emotions and many more that made the blonde completely _speechless_. 

“What are you thinking?” Lana asked as her smile faded.

“Your eyes,” Jen said falteringly. “They’re just…so beautiful.”

Jennifer was glad to see Lana’s smile coming back to her face.

“Thank you,” Lana’s other hand reached out to grasp her cheek. “I-I’m really sorry for what I did to you,” she gulped. “I didn't want to hurt you and I…I didn't know that you felt the same way.” 

“I do feel…too much,” Jen muttered quietly before leaning in and capturing Lana’s plump lips in a brief kiss. “Do you really… _want_ this?” Jen gestured to them both, faces so close, sharing the same breaths.

“Yes,” Lana said without thinking twice. “But…” She added hesitantly, causing Jen to frown. “You can’t have me completely. At least, not yet.”

“Because you’re married,” the blonde let go of her, and turned to face a fixed spot on the wall.

“Yes, I am still…married. But that doesn't mean we can’t meet each other and…kiss.”

Jennifer turned to look at her co-star, her face flat. “That means I will be your _mistress_?”

“Don't say it like that, please,” the brunette intertwined their hands again. “That’s not what I want you to think because you’re much more than that.” 

They stayed a moment in silence, just getting lost into each other’s eyes. There were still a lot of things to be said between them, but Jennifer was just _tired_. She wanted to have Lana no matter what. She was in love with this woman, and she wouldn't give up on her now that she knew she felt the same way. Jennifer couldn't deny what was inside her heart anymore. It had been too long, and she knew now how happy she was when with Lana Parrilla.

“If that is what it takes to be with you, I’m willing to try.”

“Are you?” Lana murmured in a whisper, seeming surprised by Jen’s answer.

“Yes, Lana. I’ve been too long without you. I can’t wait anymore,” Jen pulled her by the waist and moaned when their lips met again in a tender kiss. They wouldn't have stopped if it wasn't for their dogs that started barking loudly and jumping happily around them.

“Lola, sit!” Lana commanded, pointing a finger at Lola and the blonde laughed at her, realizing that her co-star didn't want to be interrupted right now.

Lola sat quietly and Ava imitated her. “Aw, they are so good,” Jen commented and pulled Lana against her again, pressing their bodies together to capture her lips. Their dogs started barking excitedly again, but that didn't bother them at all. While their kiss deepened, Lola and Ava started running around the house, barking happily as if they were feeling the same emotions that Lana and Jen were. 

The blonde smiled in the kiss, humming pleasurably as she felt all those sensations at once: the feel of Lana’s body pressed on hers, the strong heat between them causing their breaths to deepen, and the previous tender kiss turning into a passionate one, where tongues danced knowingly and hands wandered _everywhere_.

“I need to feel you, Jennifer,” Lana purred throatily in Jen’s ear and then bit her earlobe provocatively.

The blonde didn't hesitate to answer, “I’m all yours.”

Lana grinned and their mouths found each other again. They stood up from the couch and started walking, knowing the exact place where their feet were leading them to. When they got to the bedroom, Lana didn't wait longer and pushed the blonde onto the mattress, climbing on it right after her. They both kneeled on the mattress as their hands moved eagerly on each other’s body to take the barrier of clothes. Jen watched with desire as Lana’s clothes came off, and she knelt completely naked in front of her, her perfect breasts in view as a blush spread to her cheeks. Lana was so incredibly stunning, and Jennifer felt really excited to have her again. However, she noted that this time they weren't as _wild_ as on their first night. It was calm, and slow and _loving_. Jennifer was enjoying every minute of it, especially because Lana had confessed everything she was feeling and her layers were _bare_ , _exposed_. Lana was vulnerable, and didn't seem to mind at all which made the blonde feel even happier with their situation. She couldn't have Lana _only_ for her, but at least she could see that the brunette _wanted_ to be with her for real and not just toy with her.

Between sweet and wet kisses, they ended up laying on the bed rather quickly, Lana settling on top of Jen. The brunette looked so happy, her grin showing pearly, white teeth shining brightly, which warmed Jen’s heart greatly. Her hands clutched eagerly on Lana’s waist, pushing her down, causing her sex to rub against her own. She realized they were both extremely wet by now, and they had barely just started.

Lana leaned in and pressed a wet kiss on Jen’s lips, and then she fell to her side, propping herself on an elbow. She grasped Jen’s face and murmured, “You make me feel so _much,”_ another brief kiss on her lips and then Lana’s hand was sliding down, towards where Jennifer wanted her most. Skilled fingers started playing with her folds, and without any preamble, Lana entered two digits inside the blonde, who whimpered at the touch. “You feel so _good_ ,” the brunette purred, her mouth rasping against Jen’s lips.

Her eyes closed at the feeling. Her body turned into jelly by the pleasurable shivers her body received. Lana felt so good inside of her, her fingers moving slowly, yet at a delicious pace, driving Jen closer and closer to the edge. It wouldn't take long for her to come. This was too good; Lana was too good, and knowing that now she could have her made her feel overwhelmed with want, passion and _happiness._

It only took a few more faster thrusts and a teasing bite on her neck for Jen to explode, her back arching off the bed as her juices wetted Lana’s incredible fingers. _God, she had missed this._

When her aftershocks were mostly gone, she sprung into action, causing Lana to lay on her back as Jen moved swiftly to settle between her legs. When her eyes faced Lana’s bare core, she realized how she glistened with want, desperately in need for Jennifer’s mouth. She looked up and found dark eyes watching her intensely; longing and lust all mixed together. Her tongue slipped past her lips and came in contact with Lana’s wet pussy for the first time. Jen didn't know exactly how to do this, but as she started tasting the woman tentatively, she found out that Lana had an amazing taste and the need to feel her more and more with her mouth increased. She heard the brunette’s soft moans beneath her, and kept working with her tongue, licking every bit of skin of that delicious heat.

She slipped two fingers in at once inside the brunette as she kept licking her all over. Lana’s hands found its way to her hair, which made Jen feel _invincible_ somehow. Lana was liking was she was doing and that was wonderful to know. With tongue and finger working profusely at the same time, it took barely a few minutes for Lana to come undone in her mouth, releasing more of her delectable taste. She moaned loud, her legs widening and giving more access to the blonde as she lavished her tongue on the brunette’s juices. It was too good. Jen would love to do this more often. She loved the feel of Lana on her tongue. 

When Jen crawled back to the spot she was laying previously, she came face to face a flushed Lana who seemed to be very much tired and truly satisfied.

“That was amazing,” the brunette murmured as she grasped Jen’s face to place a kiss on her mouth.

“We are amazing together,” Jen said, bringing their bodies closer and sliding her right leg in the middle of Lana’s.

“Yes, we are,” she smiled lazily at the blonde, closing her tired eyes next. “You sucked all my energy, JMo. I can barely keep my eyes open now.”

“I won’t say I’m sorry for that, Parrilla,” Jen chuckled and kissed the plump lips briefly. Lana only smiled and kept her eyes closed. They spent a moment in silence, and Jen didn't feel like sleeping at all. She wanted this post-sex moment to linger. She wasn't ready to sleep and feel the emptiness by her side again. With a frown, she asked quietly, “Are you sure you want to sleep? I…I wanted to talk more with you.”

Lana quickly opened her eyes again, looking at Jen with fondness and also a bit worried. “What do you want to talk about?”

“I don’t know, I just…want this moment to last longer.”

“Okay, let’s talk,” the brunette said, trying to keep her eyes fully opened as she draped one arm over Jen’s waist. “Bex knows about us.”

She blinked with a frown and then asked, “Rebecca Mader?”

“Yes. Is there a problem with her knowing about us?”

“No, no, of course not. I know you two are close friends.”

“We’re like sisters, literally,” Lana smiled. “I tell her everything.”

“Yeah, uh…you also kissed each other twice,” Jen said awkwardly. She watched the video of Lana and Rebecca kissing in Brazil a few years ago and _hated_ it. It was all over her timeline and she had been _mad_.

“Wait, you know we kissed?” Lana questioned curiously, a teasing smile on her face.

Jen couldn't help but roll her eyes at the memory of those videos. “I’ve seen the videos. And I didn't like it, by the way. But that is not the point. What did she say about us?”

“You seem jealous,” Lana smirked, raking her nails against Jen’s back, causing a shiver to run down on her spine.

“I was very jealous, now I am just…used to things how they are. And I know you’re just sisters. But now tell me, what did she say?”

“She said she totally approves if that is what makes both of us happy.”

“That is good. Ginny also knows about us. And I think Josh does too.”

“I figured you would tell her after…after yesterday.”

Silence filled the bedroom, both of them getting lost into their own thoughts. Jen was the first to break the silence, “So what we have now is like…um, a secret relationship?”

“If you want to call it that way, yeah.”

More silence. More thoughts. More doubts.

Jen was watching as Lana eyelids closed, and then opened. She was very tired and the blonde didn't want to keep her awake. However, Jen couldn't sleep with the doubts that were disturbing her mind. She had to do something about it.

“I can’t sleep,” she murmured quietly, causing Lana to groan and her eyes to open once again.

“Why not?”

Jen sighed and then continued quietly, “I’m afraid of you not being here the morning after. I don’t want to go through all of that again.”

Jennifer was slightly surprised when Lana leaned in and kissed her tenderly, pressing their foreheads together. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Yes, you are,” the blonde swallowed the lump in her throat. “You will always go back to him in the end of the day.”

“No, tomorrow I’ll stay here.”

“You promise?”

“Yes, Jen. I promise I’ll be here with you the whole time.”

Jen flashed her a small smile and then closed her eyes, preventing hurtful tears from sliding down on her face. She felt slightly better when Lana embraced her awkwardly due to their position, and remained that way, her face finding a good spot just above Jen’s heart. 

Jennifer breathed out a relieved sigh as she listened to the sounds of Lana’s breath evening. Her fears and doubts eventually faded and she was finally able to sleep in the comfort of Lana Parrilla’s arms.


	15. Secret Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! It's midnight in my country, so I decided to post it now ;)   
> I hope you like it!
> 
> PS: the fanfic chosen for this chapter is named Casual Sex by Clumsy Firefly on this site [AO3 or ff.net]. I just added a few pieces, and it's in bold; credits to the author.

**CHAPTER FIFTEEN**

**Secret Love**

* * *

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

Exasperation filled her body when she sat up bolt upright on the bed, breathing harshly as she glanced at the other side of the mattress. Her heart was racing uncontrollably, but it all faded when she realized that Lana was there, sleeping peacefully beside her, her hair cupped behind her ear and her hand under her cheek. Her bare body was half covered, probably because Jen had stolen the covers sometime during the night. She was so beautiful, so incredibly stunning that the blonde felt speechless at the sight of Lana Parrilla sleeping in her bed.

Jen remembered Lana’s words last night: _“I promise I’ll be here with you the whole time.”_

And indeed she stayed.

A smile reached Jen’s lips and she leaned in to embrace her co-star tightly. She heard a pleasing hum escaping the brunette’s mouth, and her smile grew. The blonde was so happy that her first instinct was to kiss Lana _everywhere._ She saw a satisfied smile appear on Lana’s lips as she kissed her neck and rosy cheeks, laying on top of her and feeling the sensation of their bare skin pressed together.

Waking up beside Lana was a feeling she would never, _ever_ be able to forget.

“What a good morning reception,” Lana said, chuckling throatily as Jen kept kissing every inch of her face frantically.

“You’re here,” that’s all Jen was able to say. 

“I am, Jen. I’m here,” the brunette muttered and pulled Jen in for a quick peck on the lips. 

Jen snuggled up closer to the brunette, resting her head on her chest to listen to the soothing, repetitive thump of Lana’s heart. After long minutes in this calming position, she asked quietly, “Do you have to leave soon?”

“I have nothing to do all day. I simply intend to stay with you…unless you want me to leave.”

Jen grinned against a bare chest and started placing open-mouthed kisses on the smooth skin. “You know the answer is no.” 

“I didn't exactly _know_ the answer, but now that you told me,” the brunette smiled. And that, _God,_ that happy, satisfied smile looked _perfect_ on her.

“I want exactly what you want, Lana.”

“Yeah?” The brunette propped herself up on her elbows to gaze at Jen intensely.

“Yeah,” Jen quickly answered. “I was actually wondering…” she started shyly, leaning in and draping her left leg over the brunette’s hips. “If you’re up for round two?”

An amused chuckle left those sinful lips and Jen couldn't help but beam at the woman. “You know the answer is yes, Jennifer.”

The blonde’s hand started to trace a path with her short fingernails on Lana’s breast to her sex. She watched as her co-star bit her lower lip and her eyes darkened instantly, a moan escaping her mouth when Jen touched her already slick folds.

Today had clearly started _amazingly._

* * *

 

 

&

It was almost eleven in the morning when they got out of bed and started preparing brunch. Today seemed oddly like the first time Lana had slept over, except for the fact that they were having _sex_ now… and were sort of _together._ To be honest, it felt much better this way. To prove a point, Jen walked over to her companion who was making an omelet by the stove and kissed her neck, feeling her co-star shiver against her and then giggle with the tickling.

“What are we going to do today?” Jen asked with a lazy smile, her arms around the brunette’s waist.

“Cuddle?”

Her smile broadened. “Totally up for it. What if we also check some mature SwanQueen fanfictions? I guess that would be interesting,” Jen wiggled her eyebrows, causing Lana to laugh out loud.

“You have a dirty, dirty mind, Morrison.”

“You make me this way, Parrilla,” she pressed another kiss on Lana’s neck.

“It’s definitely my fault, huh?”

“Of course,” the blonde said automatically. “You up for it?”

“Reading while we cuddle? Of course I am.”

“Can’t promise I’ll be able to keep my hands to myself, though.”

The brunette turned her head over her shoulder to look at Jen. “I’m not opposed to that,” she kissed the blonde gently on the lips, but the kiss quickly escalated. A burnt smell filled the kitchen and Lana stopped the kiss immediately. “Shit, it’s burning,” Lana pulled away with a grunt to finish cooking the omelet. Jennifer just laughed at their situation.

God, she was so _happy_.

“Where do you want to read the fanfiction?” The blonde asked.

“In your bed.”

Jen grinned and nodded in response. Then, she started helping Lana so they could eat quickly and go back to cuddling again.

When they had finally finished eating breakfast over a small conversation, they quickly walked towards the bedroom and laid comfortably in the bed. Jen grabbed her computer that was on her bedside table and put it on her thighs so they could start reading the fanfiction.

“Which one do you suggest?” She asked the brunette.

“I don’t know. Pick something from season one,” Lana said as she snuggled up closer to the blonde.

Jennifer smiled involuntarily and started looking for a random, mature SwanQueen fanfiction. After some minutes, she finally found one in which Emma and Regina decide to have casual sex, set in season one. 

“Is this one okay?” She asked again.

“Yes. It looks _interesting_ ,” Lana winked at her, causing Jen to chuckle and bit her lower lip.

“It does. Let’s start.”

They started reading in silence, chuckling at the first paragraphs and how the fanfic writers detailed mostly everything, and how good it was to read Emma’s and Regina’s personality like this. They moved on quickly, commenting about it here and then.

“Oh, this actually happened,” Lana commented with a smile about the scene when Regina paid a visit to Emma at the station, caught her playing darts and said, _“Hard at work I see.”_

“In our fans imagination, this scene clearly leads to sex.” 

Lana arched her eyebrows at the blonde’s comment. “In yours too, I believe,” the brunette teased, leaning in to place a wet kiss on Jen’s thin lips.

They continued reading in silence, their smile increasing as they read the paragraphs further. When Regina kissed Emma in the story, Jen noticed as her co-star started moving her body, pressing herself slightly against Jen’s side while she hummed pleasurably.

A low moan escaped Lana’s mouth when they reached two specific paragraphs:

**Regina grabbed the sheriff and slammed her against the wall, kicking the door shut in one swift move. Regina put a hand against Emma's neck, not hard enough to choke her but rough enough to ensure the sheriff would not be leaving her grip any time soon.**

**Regina looked into Emma's eyes with fury and then slammed her lips against Emma's roughly, closing her eyes as she did. She took her hand off Emma's throat and wrapped her arms around the sheriff's waist, sliding a hand up Emma's shirt. She ran her nails down the blonde's sides towards her pants, making a small moan escape the sheriff's lips. Regina skillfully unbuttoned Emma's pants and slipped a hand down claiming her mound. Finding her clit, she rubbed softly making the blonde's moans increase in volume.**

“Liking much?” Jen teased, poking at Lana’s side.

“Too much, to be honest. It reminds me of when we played SwanQueen that time and kissed each other senseless.”

Lana propped herself on an elbow and leaned in close to her face was only a few inches from Jen’s.

“Do you remember?” The brunette asked again.

“How could I forget the day you kissed me like that?”

Lana grinned seductively. “Oh yeah?” Jen nodded while biting her lower lip. “What if I kiss you like that _right now?_ ”

Jennifer nodded eagerly and their mouths clashed together, teeth biting into lips and tongues curling. Jen found the buttons of Lana’s pants quickly, but, unfortunately, her hand was held and their kiss stopped right away. One might think she was still tired from last night’s and this morning’s _pleasurable_ _workout,_ but to be honest, Jen was just eager for more of Lana. She would never get too much of this woman.

“We didn't get there yet,” Lana nibbled on the blonde’s bottom lip and then pulled away, resting her head once more on Jen’s chest so they could continue reading. Jen sighed, feeling slightly frustrated, but continued reading willingly. She was quite curious about the rest of the story.

**Regina wasted no time in sliding two fingers inside, a satisfied groan escaping from the sheriff’s lips. The blonde rested the back of her head against the wall and stared at the ceiling as Regina began a steady rhythm with two digits inside of her. The sheriff's moans continued to only grow louder as the mayor's fingers slowly began to pick up in pace. Emma gripped onto the mayor's upper arms as Regina slowly began to push harder and quicker. Regina thrust hard and then slow a few times, making the sheriff moan loudly.**

_God_ , Jen was deeply aroused by now. And having Lana’s body pressed against her side and hearing her uneven breathing on her chest became too hard to bear as they kept reading the story.

“This is becoming some kind of _torture_ ,” Jen mumbled uncomfortably and Lana chuckled throatily against her chest.

**Emma’s breathing increased, and she closed her eyes as Regina pushed her fingers harder and faster into the blonde. She moaned loudly and if anyone else was in the small station, they would have heard this wild commotion, but luckily, it was only the two women. The blonde gripped the mayor’s arms tighter as Regina continued to thrust her fingers harder, picking up her pace once again. Regina connected their lips again roughly, ignoring her own growing arousal as the sheriff’s moans increased. The mayor thrust her fingers roughly a few more times making Emma climax, causing the blonde to groan in satisfaction.**

“Torture indeed.”

Jennifer gasped when she felt Lana’s hand sliding downwards toward her covered sex.

“What if I do _exactly_ what Regina is doing right now?” Lana purred sexily in her ear.

“Emma and I would be _very_ grateful.”

She felt Lana’s lips turn into a smile against her skin.

“Let me take over, then,” the brunette closed the computer’s screen, pushed it away and then settled on top of Jennifer.

* * *

 

&

Their amazing day full of delicious, mind-blowing sex and cuddling was about to end, and Jen felt really upset. She wished Lana didn't have to leave. Their conversation of last night came back to her mind and she wondered about what she had said to Lana: _“You will always go back to him in the end of the day.”_

Sadly, that statement was true and there was nothing Jennifer could do to stop it. 

“I have to work early tomorrow.”

“I know,” the blonde sighed. “It’s my day off, though, so we won’t see each other tomorrow.”

“I know, but we will see each other again on the other days, so there’s no need to worry.”

“I’m not worried, I just…I will miss you.”

“Me too, Jen,” Lana placed a chaste kiss on her lips and then embraced her tightly. “I’ll see you on Wednesday, okay?”

“Okay.”

They shared one last kiss and then Lana left hesitantly, causing Jen’s heart to clench inside her painful chest.

* * *

 

&

On the next day, as it was her day off and not Lana’s, she decided to take Ava around the city by car. Her puppy loved a car ride and since Jen hadn't been spending much time with her dog, she would give her this treat today.

When she entered her car, she decided to take a selfie with Ava. After posting it on Instagram and Twitter, she waited for the comments to appear, as always, because she loved reading them. And then, the realization hit her hard in the face.

On the selfie with Ava, her dog-collar had turned around somehow and there was Jen’s phone number printed on the fucking collar now completely _exposed_ to the _world_. _Oh, my God._

“Fuck!” Jen shouted angrily at her phone. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! I can't believe I did this!”

She glared at the selfie and hated herself for being so careless. _Stupid dog-collar!_ Right when she wanted to post a damn selfie? Seriously? She deleted it right away, but of course her fans would have screenshot the photo already. That's how she started receiving weird messages on her WhatsApp. _Why did she have this app in the first place?_

_Shit_ , that was so fucked up! And she was so stupid! 

She was now receiving many messages on her phone; her fans saying sweet things, and there was also some messages about SwanQueen with some _fan art_ attached to her and Lana… And also some stuff about CaptainSwan, which she blocked right away. _Ugh, for God’s sake!_ Jen hated having her privacy invaded and the fact that everyone had access to her private number completely overwhelmed her with anger. She threw the noisy cellphone buzzing with notifications on the passenger seat and rubbed her forehead, concerned about all of this mess.

“Damn it, what do I do?” She looked around in her car, freaking out as she had no idea of what to do to reverse the situation. She needed help. Maybe Lana could deal with this better than Jennifer.

She searched for her co-star’s name on her contacts list and when she was about to call her, her phone buzzed with an incoming call. _Oh, for fuck’s sake!_ Some of her fans were clearly paranoid about this whole mess. She refused it right away and then called Lana quickly.

_“Hello?”_

“Hey, Lana. Are you busy at the moment?”

_“Hi, Jen. I’m on my break. Why?”_

“I did something stupid.”

_“What did you do?”_

“I posted a selfie with Ava and my number appeared on her collar.”

_“Oh my God, Jen,”_ she heard Lana laugh.

“Yeah, I know. I was so eager to post the photo that I didn't even notice that the collar had turned.”

_“Alright, it happens. What do you plan on doing now?”_

“Well, I’m receiving a lot of messages and people have tried to call me and…and _shit_ , now someone wants to _FaceTime!_ Oh God, Lana! Help me!”

_“Okay, they will probably send you a lot of SwanQueen and CaptainSwan messages, but don’t reply to any and don’t be rude. Let’s take care of this easily,”_ Jen hummed positively as Lana kept talking. _“Call your mobile operator and ask to cancel your number and change to another one. Once you’ve finished that, post the selfie again and tell your fans that it’s all solved.”_

“Simple like that?” She asked in disbelief, noticing how Lana knew how to solve a complicated situation without _snapping_ at anyone. She was amazing. 

_“Yes, dear. That’s it. Oh and call me again so I can have your new number.”_

“Yeah, I will,” she beamed stupidly at the phone. “I’ll do that right away! Thank you. I…I wish I could kiss you right now.”

_“Ugh, me too. Our schedule sucks! We should be together right now.”_

“Don’t worry, I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

_“Okay. I’ll be waiting for you. Bye, Jen!”_

The blonde soon did all the things that Lana told her and after one hour, it was all solved. Without Lana’s help, Jen wouldn't have been able to handle the situation correctly. _Goddamn_ , she hated having her privacy invaded…but that wasn't her fans’ fault. Thank God she had asked for her co-star’s help. She might have snapped at a few annoying people that were calling her on the way to fix this, but thankfully, Lana was there to help her. Jen just felt like kissing her _senseless_ now.

* * *

 

&

The next day, Jen went to work feeling brighter and a little bit playful. She was very happy that she was supposed to film with Lana today, at least, and very excited about the fact that they would spend their breaks together.

When she saw the brunette standing in the middle of Regina’s office, waiting to rehearse a scene with the crew, Jen couldn’t help smiling at the woman. Lana was so beautiful, and even more when she was dressed as the _hottest fictional character_ _of all_ , which is, Regina Mills. She stared at that woman, wondering if all they had now was true. This could surely be from a very creative dream that her mind had made up, after all. She wouldn't be surprised. 

Jennifer walked chirpily towards her co-star and then hugged her tightly, not lingering for too long in her arms not to draw any curious eyes to them. They weren’t used to hugging each other. In fact, Jennifer could _count_ on her fingers the number of times they had hugged each other in the past few years. They were never too close like they are now.

“Glad to see you, Miss Swan,” Lana said sharply, doing an impression of Regina Mills. However, her joyful smile gave her away.

“Emma Swan missed her Regina Mills,” Jen said teasingly, fighting against the urge to wrap her arms around Lana’s waist and kiss her passionately.

“Regina missed her too,” Lana said throatily, her eyes trailing over Jen’s form unabashedly.

“I…I think I forgot _something_ in my trailer,” Jen stressed and wiggled her eyebrows tellingly. “Wanna go there with me and… _find_ this something?” She bounced on her feet, eagerly waiting for Lana to say yes to her question and go there with her so they could make out for a little while. Jen missed those perfect lips _terribly_ and it had only been a day.

“Hmm, I think I can try to find this _something_ with you,” the brunette murmured throatily and then started walking towards the director, told him they needed to get something, and left the scene, Jennifer trailing helplessly behind her.

She couldn't wait until they arrived in her trailer, and pulled Lana by the arm, bringing her body tight against hers. Their breaths mingled and she pushed the brunette onto the nearest wall, their lips finding each other with no preamble.

They both moaned into the kiss, and Jennifer couldn't help trailing her hands over that marvellous body, feeling the fabric of Regina’s tight skirt on Lana’s body. It fitted perfectly on her.

Jennifer was deeply focused on those amazing lips and tongue that she didn't hear the clearing throat right behind them. She only came to her senses when Lana pushed her away.

“ _Shit_ , Bex,” Lana placed her hand on her own chest as she tried to breathe. “You scared the hell out of me.”

Rebecca sniggered, and Jen scratched the back of her head in discomfort. She was definitely blushing and feeling wholly embarrassed by being caught. She really thought no one was going to find them in this dark corner.

“Sorry, sis. I could feel the heat of both of you from a mile away, seriously,” Bex said dryly. “I’m surprised no one else came in here to check if there was a fire or something,” the red-head joked, causing them to laugh. Jen was still uncomfortable, which was _stupid_. This was just Bex and she was glad it had been her to catch them and not someone else.

“Uh, yeah, we…lost ourselves here for a few minutes,” Lana explained and Rebecca hummed knowingly, trying to hide a mocking expression. “We shouldn’t have left the office, anyway.”

Jennifer cleared her throat and repressed an amused chuckle of her own. “Yeah, that was a bit unprofessional of me.”

“She can’t keep her hands to herself,” Lana whispered to Bex, glancing at Jen with mirth in her eyes.

“You can’t either, Parrilla,” the blonde teased back.

“Oh, I know.”

“I wish I could scream _Morrilla_ right now,” Rebecca added with extra excitement and they laughed again, walking the way to Regina’s office.

* * *

 

&

Off to this new reality, Jen found hard to believe it was true, the week followed seamlessly. The blonde saw Lana every day on set and their breaks were extremely _fun_ if you know what I mean. They always found a way to sneak out to one of their trailers and spend the whole break making out or engaging in a quickie. Jen was loving every minute of this. She rarely remembered that Lana was married to someone else. Having her there, with her, doing pleasurable things every day was the best she could ask for.

However, when they were out of the comfort of their trailers and had to be professional in front of the cast and crew, it became very _hard_ to keep their hands to themselves and also the _heart eyes._ Jen hadn't noticed that they were doing this in _public_ , but then Ginny approached her and told Jennifer how much she had been observing them. Of course her fake mom already knew about her _relationship_ with Lana, so she began telling Jen everything she saw while they thought no one was looking. Ginny said they seemed happier _;_ were always smiling at everyone, sometimes got too close to each other, trying to be subtle, and failed _miserably_. 

Ginny had found them once making out in a corner, just like Rebecca had at the beginning of that week, and she cleared her throat loudly, causing Jennifer and Lana to split apart immediately. It had been very funny, but still, _careless_. No one else could know about them. It hurt Jennifer a bit when Lana had told her so, but she had just forgotten about it quickly. She had to be satisfied with what she had for now. Right?

What Jen loved most about this — _them —_ was that Lana always made an extreme effort to be with the blonde. She hadn't slept over in her house again, which didn't bother Jennifer since they were seeing each other every day and spending a lot of time together at the set. Jen was very happy and she thought Lana was too.

Today was Friday, and thankfully, Jen’s schedule matched with Lana’s and they only had to start their workday routine after lunch. She had texted the brunette at 9 am after she woke up and asked her if they could spend some time in her trailer and then order some food. She would much prefer eating out somewhere, but there were always fans around Steveston and paparazzi, so they couldn't be seen together even out for lunch. She knew what Lana would say if she asked for it, so she decided to simply accept the fact that they couldn't do that and tried to be satisfied with Lana’s ‘yes’ to have lunch in her trailer.

Jennifer had knocked a few minutes ago on the door of her co-star’s trailer and was greeted with a bright smile. They kissed briefly and then she followed through the small space towards the mini-kitchen.

“Want some coffee?”

“Yes, please,” she smiled and leaned in to kiss Lana’s shoulder.

“How was your night?”

“Lonely without you,” Jen muttered with honesty. Her nights had been very lonely since last Monday.

“Luckily you have me during the days,” Lana said throatily, putting her mug of steaming coffee on the counter. Then, she did the same with Jen’s. The blonde was rather surprised when Lana rested her hand on her sternum and pushed her body further towards the couch. The brunette’s eyes darkened instantly as she pushed Jen to sit on the couch and settled herself on her lap right after.

“Lucky me,” Jen muttered with a smirk as her mouth started tracing a hot path with her tongue on the skin of Lana’s chest to her neck. She nibbled on the flesh lightly, and then sucked hard, hearing the brunette moan in her ear and move against her lap. It excited her to no end that Lana was moaning in her lap. She loved this; her, _them_.

Jen bit harder on the skin, and what she wasn't expecting was for Lana to pull away, and rub her hand over the spot Jen had just bitten. “What’s the problem?”

“As much as I like it, I’m afraid you can’t leave any marks on me.”

Jen sighed and looked away. “What a way to kill the mood.”

Lana grasped her chin and made the blonde look at her. “I’m sorry. And you know why you can’t.”

She sighed again. “I wish I didn’t.”

“Let’s talk about something else, okay?” The blonde nodded. “Eddy sent me a message this morning. They’ve been wanting to talk to us about something.”

“Hopefully is about the future of Emma and Regina,” Jen said quietly, picturing the same sentence for her future with Lana. She imagined it in her mind, looking for a reasonable solution of how their future would be, but everything she found was empty hollowness. Her heart clenched inside her chest and she dismissed the horrible feeling completely.

“Yeah, I think it is,” Lana said with a smile and then frowned at Jen. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, uh, did Eddy tell you what time they’re going to talk to us?”

“No, but I suppose it’s after lunch or in-between takes.”

“Yeah, probably.”

They spent the next few hours before lunch cuddling, chatting about random topics and also kissing slowly and languidly, enjoying profusely the feel of each other’s lips. Jen’s mood had totally been killed a few hours ago, and she wasn't feeling so happy anymore. But she tried to put that thought aside and just focus on Lana and how good it felt to have her there.

* * *

 

&

The episodes of the show had been quite the boredom this season. Jen wasn't sure if she was liking the plot _at all._ It was nice having new characters entering the show, and also the fact that SwanQueen was going to be canon was the best thing. Jennifer hoped Adam and Eddy would tell them how it would work between Emma and Regina from now on because they were still filming the first episodes of part two of season six and it had been very slow around the set lately. Jennifer was guessing that the writers were trying to solve some issues with the new plots and how SwanQueen was going to be canon. She really hoped they had that figured by when they talked to them today.

It was after lunch when Lana and Jen were called to visit the writer’s office. The blonde felt slightly eager to know what would happen, and also hopeful. She really wanted a very nice happy beginning/ending for them. _Just like she wanted for her and Lana in real life._

“Good afternoon, ladies. We finally called you again to talk about SwanQueen.”

“Good. I was becoming worried that it wouldn’t happen,” Lana said with a sheepish smile.

“Well, if it depends on us, it’s definitely going to happen!” Eddy said with a smile.

“When are we going to start filming SwanQueen?” Jen asked with curiosity. She simply couldn't wait to kiss Lana in front of the cast and crew, even though they would just be portraying Emma and Regina.

“We have a huge plan for them. We’re preparing a musical episode for the finale of this season and that will be when Emma and Regina will realize that they love each other.”

“A musical episode? Wow!” Lana stared in awe at the writers. Jen was surprised too. She had no clue how they writers would manage that in Storybrooke, but she was excited to see and start rehearsing soon.

“Are you two up for singing?” Eddy asked with mild worry in his eyes. “We haven't told the others yet. It’s still just a plan, to be honest. But we are hoping ABC is going to accept it.”

“I hope they do because I’m definitely up for singing,” Jen said with a bright smile. She loved musicals and she was part of a band when she was a child for a while. She kind of missed the adrenaline.

“Well, I have never done a musical before but I’m really interested in learning everything,” Lana said.

“That’s great, ladies. We are really excited about it!” Adam said.

“We’re also sorry because we can’t tell you much yet. But SwanQueen is going to be canon in the finale, and that will lead to the seventh season. We are hoping that the fans are going to love it and the show will be renewed, then,” Eddy explained and they both nodded at him

This was good news. Jen was really excited about this new idea. Hopefully, everything would be figured out soon and they would know what would be the future of Emma and Regina. 


	16. Secret Love Song

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Sorry for the small chapter. And sorry for only be posting on Sundays. I know it's a lot of time to wait.
> 
> There's a song for you guys to listen and read the lyrics at the end of the chapter. The name is Secret Love Song by Little Mix and Jason Derulo.
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy it! Be prepared for the angst ;)

**CHAPTER SIXTEEN**

**Secret Love Song**

* * *

 

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

The following days at the set ran smoothly. Things only started crashing onto her head when Ginny and Josh announced they would be leaving the show at the end of the sixth season. Everyone was sad about it, and then Jennifer remembered that her contract would expire at the end of this season. It had been six years already, and it was going to _expire_. Her heart hurt as she thought about that. Surely she would have to sign it again so Swan Queen could be canon in the next season. Well, it was for a good reason and she’d definitely stay in the show for that, as long as she had Lana by her side. And hopefully the show would be renewed and the fans would be very happy with the turn of events.

Ginny and Josh were planning a farewell party in their house and started inviting as many people of the cast as possible. They also mentioned that they were in _need_ of a break from their toddlers, and having a party would be great for them to relax and have fun. The party would be in their house in Vancouver, which was already up for _sale_ and Jen felt the familiar tug of pain of how things were changing super fast around her and she couldn't help but feel _stuck_. Of course _stuck_ wasn't the right word. She didn't feel a _lot_ that way. Maybe just a little bit. Well, it had been long _six years_ and it had become tiring to film those previous seasons in which Emma Swan became a lifeless character. Now, however, things were about to change for the better and the feeling of staying _stuck_ would simply go away. Swan Queen was going to be canon in the end and that’s what mattered. Besides, her ‘relationship’ with Lana only got better each day, and that made Jen really happy. The fact that people were going to start leaving the show was new to her, but she obviously would have to get used to that. 

On Friday night, a day before the party, Jen texted Lana asking what time she was going to arrive at the party. She couldn't wait to take Lana with her and enjoy her presence between the cast and crew people. She really hoped it was fine for them to stay close when there were no paparazzi or fans around. And she’d definitely want Lana sleeping over at her house after. She’d missed her in her bed. 

Her phone buzzed on the counter and she grabbed it to see who it was. Lana had answered:

**At 8:30 pm. Fred can’t leave earlier.**

Jen’s heart sank in her chest when she saw Lana’s husband name on the screen. Lana was going to take _him_. Why would she do that to Jennifer?

The blonde typed a quick response back:

**Why are you taking him there?**

Instead of another text coming up, it was an incoming call. Jen pondered for a minute before picking up.

Surprisingly _,_ Lana didn't even say _hello_. She just blurted her angry words out: 

_“Jennifer, you know exactly why I’m taking him.”_

“No, I actually don’t know why you’re taking him. It’s a party for _us_ , the cast and crew people. He isn't a part of that so he has nothing to do with it.”

Okay, maybe Jennifer had been too harsh with her words. Lana didn't deserve that.

There was a loud sigh on the other end of the line _. “He’s my husband, Jen. He would question me if I didn't take him there.”_

It was Jen’s turn to sigh. “I don’t like this, Lana.”

_“I know, and I…I feel bad. Actually, bad for both of you.”_

“You should,” she answered quietly.

After a long pause, the brunette asked, _“Are you mad at me?”_

“Yeah. I’m madder at him for having you.”

_“Jen-”_

“What? It’s the truth.”

_“You know you can’t be jealous.”_

She sighed again. “Yeah, fine. Whatever. Take him.”

_“You’re going to be there, right?”_

“Yes.”

_“I will see you tomorrow.”_

“Yeah,” she hung up, feeling an annoying tear wanting to slip from her eyes. She didn't let it drop. She was stronger than this.

She had to be.

* * *

 

&

Her previous excited mood for the party had changed completely. At first, the opportunity to have fun with Lana at a party had been _so_ exciting. But now that she knew Lana would take her fucking _husband,_ her mood was ruined and she didn't feel like going at all. However, she knew she couldn't do that because a) Ginny and Josh would be very disappointed with her and b) she couldn't show that she was jealous. Like Lana had said, she _can’t_ be jealous. Jen had agreed to be Lana’s sort of _mistress_ and now she couldn't complain about the brunette taking her husband with her to an event.

_Ugh_. If Lana knew how hard this was for her, she wouldn't have asked that in the first place.

God, this was all so _fucked up_. She loved being with Lana, was in love with her, and that was obvious. Lana had said that she was in love with her too, which had meant the world at the time. But now? Now that Jennifer was going to have to tolerate her co-star with her husband, knowing all of the things they’ve done together these past few weeks was going to be extremely _hard._ Jen didn't _want_ to have to tolerate them. She wanted Lana for her only, and that was what hurt most because Lana wouldn't give her that.

* * *

 

&

When the day of the party arrived, Jen had already pushed all those feelings to the back of her mind and concentrated on Ginny’s and Josh’s happiness and the fact that she would at least _see_ Lana there, since the last three days they have been rehearsing _separately_ for the musical episode. It had been shitty to be without Lana even at the set, but she could do nothing besides focusing on her own rehearsal.

It was 8 pm and she was almost ready to go. She had put on a red flowery dress with short sleeves, light make-up on her face and braided her hair to the side. She looked gorgeous, and hopefully, she would cause some stares from a certain brunette at the party. Her main goal had been that, anyway.

When she arrived at the party, she noticed that many people had already gotten there. There were small groups of people scattered around the backyard, some talking animatedly, and some drinking sip after sip of their drinks. The backyard was decorated with many lights, lighting up the grass and the couches. She glanced around, feeling slightly out of place, even though she had been working with these people for six years. She shouldn't feel that way, though. This is _home._ Jen was probably feeling this way because Lana was going to be here soon, and she was not _alone_.

She spotted Ginny and Josh in a corner and quickly walked over to them. She greeted them excitedly, receiving hugs from each. They kept chatting about random topics and the minutes passed quickly. Jen was now ordering her second drink at the bar with Ginny, while the brunette chatted about her toddlers. It was clear that one single day without them was hard for Ginny. She has grown too attached to her kids and that was lovely.

However, a few minutes later, Ginny stopped talking when she glanced at the backyard door. Jen was with her back towards the door and realized that Ginny seemed uncomfortable all of a sudden. Jennifer knew instantly who had arrived and accompanied by _whom_. She tried to seem unfazed by it and was grateful when Ginny didn't push her. She would greet the recent guests later. Right now, she was trying to calm the fuck down and keep her composure.

“Jen, do you mind if I leave you for a minute? Josh is calling me over there.”

“Of course,” she nodded and watched as Ginny walked towards her husband who was talking to some people from the crew in the middle of the backyard.

Well, it was finally time to face the _beast._ She turned around, drink in hand, and her eyes met with Lana’s across the backyard. Her co-star smiled sheepishly at her, but Jen couldn't move. Her eyes were trained on Lana’s form in that tight, black leather dress, and how fucking _good_ she looked. Her eyes swept to the side, at last, when the _person_ snatched Lana’s attention from her away. It was _him_. Lana’s husband, who was murmuring something in the brunette’s ear, and laughing right after. Lana laughed too, but timidly. That, somehow, made Jen feel slightly better. Lana wasn't being all chirpily happy with her husband, and that was… _not bad._

Jen swallowed hard as she came out of her staring reverie. She noticed right after that Rebecca and her husband Marcus had also arrived with Lana, and now Marcus was calling Lana’s husband attention, and Jen watched warily as he leaned in to whisper something else in Lana’s ear, and the brunette just nodded, looking slightly happier now. When he walked away from Lana to join Marcus over at the bar, Rebecca approached Lana and nudged her at the side. It was then that Jennifer noticed that Lana’s eyes were still on her, as if she was hypnotized or something, and couldn't look away.

Lana grinned at Bex, her teeth shining from afar as she started walking slowly towards Jennifer. Her heart was already beating fast since she had first spotted the brunette, but now it was out of control. Lana was walking to her, seeming happy to see her and even happier to be away from her husband for a while. That changed Jen’s mood from grim to suddenly smug.

“Hello,” Lana greeted when she was close enough to the blonde.

“Hey,” Jen greeted back, her voice wavering slightly. “How are you?”

“I’m good. What are you drinking?” Lana leaned in and stared at Jen’s glass; her proximity bringing the delicious perfume fragrance to Jen’s nostrils.

“It’s bourbon or whiskey, I…I don’t actually know.”

Lana chuckled and their eyes met once again. “I should not drink that, then.”

Jennifer grinned as the recent memory of Lana getting drunk in her house filled her mind. Her eyes were getting lost in those dark one's minute by minute, and it was getting harder to control herself from pulling Lana close and kissing her. She knew she couldn't do that because Lana’s husband was right on the other side of the backyard and could easily see them. However, there was another option.

“Let’s find something else for you to drink,” she said, and in a sudden movement, grabbed Lana by the hand and pulled her inside the house.

“Where are you taking me?”

Jen looked for any bathroom in sight, so when she spotted one, she quickly dragged Lana inside and locked the door behind them.

“This is not the bar,” Lana said, voice hoarse as her dark eyes bore onto Jennifer’s body.

“I know. But I was thinking that maybe we could…get a _taste.”_

The brunette chuckled and Jen closed the gap between them. Their mouths clashed together, teeth biting into lips and tongues curling. Lana’s tongue brushed across her bottom lip, and Jen felt an unbearable heat burn between her thighs before she pressed the brunette on the wall. Their bodies melted into one another and the blonde moaned, her hand sliding down from Lana’s waist to her ass to _squeeze_ deliciously. When a wanton moan escaped the brunette’s lips, Jen smiled proudly and pulled the brunette tighter against her, turning the kiss even more passionate.

Her mind got lost as she savoured the feeling of Lana in her arms, at her complete mercy. Her right hand slipped swiftly under Lana’s tight dress and slid closer to her covered sex, teasing her over her panties. Lana was gasping hotly in her mouth, her hands holding tight around Jen’s neck to steady herself. The blonde’s smug smile broadened, and she slipped her finger inside those panties, finding nothing but sleek heat ready for her.

Her fingers started teasing the brunette’s folds while she kissed the hot skin of her neck. Lana’s nails started raking hard on her back, and her free hand held Jen’s wrist, silently begging her for more.

“Fuck, Jen. I…hmmm,” the brunette moaned and Jen smiled and smiled. “I…no, Jen, I-” Lana continued and Jen’s smile faded. “Stop.”

Jen’s hand stilled in place and, barely a few seconds later, Lana pulled it away from her panties. 

“I can’t.”

The blonde swallowed the lump in her throat and let go of Lana, standing still in front of her with wide eyes. She had an idea why Lana had told her to stop, but still, she needed to ask.

“Why?” Her voice wavered when she asked.

“My husband is outside.”

Jennifer’s world crashed down on her head and she felt embarrassed, hurt, _fucked up._

“I know that,” she murmured, looking away from those sad orbs that were previously filled with nothing but desire. Lana must have come to her senses when their kiss turned into something else. _Fuck._

“I’m sorry.”

Jen scoffed bitterly. “Yeah, right.”

Lana’s arms reached out to touch her, but she dodged away. “Jen-”

“No, forget about it. You came with him and not with me, so…” Her eyes found Lana’s again and, _shit,_ that wasn't a good idea. Lana’s eyes were watering, and Jen wondered why it was so _hard_.

“I’m so-”

A knock on the door startled them both, and they stared at it warily.

“Lana? Are you in there?” Thankfully it was Bex’s voice and not _the_ _husband._

“Uh, yes, Bex. I’m in here.”

“Fred is looking for you,” Bex said carefully. She probably knew that Jen was in there too. “He has a drink waiting for you.”

Jennifer sighed, hating the way her heart clenched in pain inside her chest. She rested her body on the opposite wall of where Lana was and looked away from the brunette. Her eyes were still fixed on Jen, but the blonde couldn't bear looking at them. Not when there were so much sadness and silent pleas in it. She could do nothing. _They_ couldn’t.

“Go,” she murmured bitterly, motioning for the door.

Lana closed the gap between them, causing Jen’s body to shiver with the sudden proximity and a promise of something: a ‘no, I’ll want to stay here with you’ or just a final kiss.

Instead, Lana murmured an ‘okay’ and left the bathroom quickly. Jen listened quietly to the small conversation Rebecca tried to start but received no response from the brunette. She turned around and faced herself in the mirror. She didn't like at all what she saw in there. Jen looked sad, heartbroken, _tired._ It was a miserable sight that she never wanted to face again.

She washed her hands in the sink, took deep, shuddering breaths and finally felt better to leave the bathroom. Jen had to move on; had to forget about all that happened in that bathroom and focus on this party. She hadn't come here for Lana, anyway. She was here for Ginny and Josh only.

* * *

 

&

When she finally left the bathroom, she quickly walked to the bar when she noticed that Lana’s husband wasn't there anymore, and ordered herself another drink. Ginny found her a moment later, nudging her on the side and flashing her a lazy smile.

“Where have you been?”

“Bathroom break,” she answered shortly and Ginny’s smile faltered.

“Something happened?”

Jennifer sighed. “Kind of. It’s complicated.”

“Because…?”

“Because she brought _him_.”

Ginny glanced at the couple in the middle of the backyard, chatting animatedly with Rebecca and Marcus.

“Oh,” the short-haired brunette murmured. She looked uncomfortable again. “I’m sorry.”

Jen hated that another _sorry_ was being said. She didn't need any more sorries for today. _Ugh, for God’s sake!_

“Don’t be sorry. I’m fine.”

She emptied her drink in a gulp and walked to the bar again to order another. She was _fine,_ and no one would tell her otherwise. Getting drunk might be a good option now.

* * *

 

&

Twenty minutes and five new drinks later, Jen found herself slightly drunk. _Slightly._ She had been chatting with Ginny and Josh for a long while; Lana forgot in her mind. When she glanced at the door and saw Colin coming in with his beautiful wife, she chirpily walked towards them to greet them. Helen really liked Jen and the blonde felt good about that. They had a good relationship.

A few minutes later, she dismissed herself to go the bathroom. Once again, she faced herself in the mirror. She knew instantly that drinking all that alcohol had been for a purpose: to hide her feelings. Was it working? Well, kind of. Jennifer had been trying hard not to look at where Lana was. She just pretended Lana and her husband didn't exist for a while.

When she left the bathroom, feeling slightly _worse_ for having acknowledged her feelings, she walked towards the backyard and glared at the stereo in a corner that was playing some romantic beat that she _hated_ immediately. Her eyes sought for that one person she didn't want to think of, and what she saw made her heart crack in pain.

The _husband_ had his hands around Lana’s waist, the side of his head in contact with Lana’s with his back to Jen as they swayed slowly to the romantic beat. Lana’s hands were around his neck, her face unreadable as she stared at the blonde from far away.

Jennifer swallowed hard, turning her fingers absentmindedly into a fist. She had to hold back tears when the husband grasped Lana’s chin and pressed a peck on her lips that lasted too long. What seemed _ages_ later _,_ she was finally able to look away, blinking back tears as she turned to the other direction finding Ginny looking worriedly at her.

“Are you okay?”

Jen inhaled sharply and nodded her head, trying as much as possible to look strong. Ginny smiled warmly at her and intertwined their arms next, pulling Jen away from the backyard. Her eyes were dazed, glancing quickly at the blurry people until she could see none of them anymore. Ginny had brought her to a bedroom and sat her on the bed. She kneeled before Jennifer and held her hands in hers.

“Are you really okay, Jen?”

The blonde scoffed, staring at their hands together and how comforting the touch felt. “Not really,” she murmured out of breath.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,” Ginny nodded and moved to sit beside Jen on the bed. “I want to go home.”

“You want me to take you to your house?”

“Yes, please. I’m drunk and can’t drive.”

“That’s okay. I’ll call Josh and we will take you there.”

“Thanks.”

* * *

 

&

She didn't say goodbye to anyone at the party. In minutes Josh and Ginny had appeared in the bedroom and with tentative smiles, they took her outside towards their car.

When they were inside, Jennifer asked quietly, “Can you set up the volume, please?” She just needed a distraction in her head that made Lana and her husband go away.

“Sure,” Josh answered as he turned the volume up. 

The guy on the radio finished speaking, and a song started. However, what Jen had hoped it would be a distraction, it was actually a song that identified Jen’s situation at the moment. A song that made her heart hurt immensely and unstoppable tears roll down on her face:

_When you hold me in the street_

_And you kiss me on the dance floor_

_I wish that it could be like that_

_Why can't it be like that_

_'Cause I'm yours_

_We keep behind closed doors_

_Every time I see you I die a little more_

_Stolen moments that we steal as_

_The curtain falls_

_It'll never be enough_

_It's obvious you're meant for me_

_Every piece of you it just fits perfectly_

_Every second, every thought_

_I'm in so deep_

_But I'll never show it on my face_

_But we know this_

_We got a love that is hopeless_

_Why can't you hold me in the street_

_Why can't I kiss you on the dance floor_

_I wish that it could be like that_

_Why can't we be like that_

_'Cause I'm yours_

_When you're with him_

_Do you call his name_

_Like you do when you're with me_

_Does it feel the same_

_Would you leave if I was ready to_

_Settle down_

_Or would you play it safe and stay_

_Girl you know this_

_We got a love that is hopeless_

_Why can't you hold me in the street_

_Why can't I kiss you on the dance floor_

_I wish that it could be like that_

_Why can't we be like that_

_'Cause I'm yours_

_And nobody knows_

_I'm in love with someone's baby_

_I don't wanna hide us away_

_Tell the world about the love we makin'_

_I'm living for that day, someday_

_Can I hold you in the street_

_Why can't I kiss you on the dance floor_

_I wish that it could be like that_

_Why can't we be like that_

_'Cause I'm yours, I'm yours_

_Oh, why can't you hold me in the street_

_Why can't I kiss you on the dance floor_

_I wish that it could be like that_

_Why can't we be like that_

_'Cause I'm yours, 'cause I'm yours_

_Why can't I say that I'm in love_

_I wanna shout it from the rooftops_

_I wish that it could be like that_

_Why can't we be like that_

_'Cause I'm yours_

_Why can't we be like that_

_Wish we could be like that_

 

When the song was over, Jennifer could barely breathe properly. She was trying hard to not make any noise because she didn't want Ginny and Josh to know that she was crying helplessly.

Tears had rolled down on her face and it had been fucking hard. She was mad at fate for playing this horrible song when all she needed was a distraction. That song was a short version of her current situation with Lana Parrilla. That song made her heart break into tiny pieces because she knew it was fucking true. Everything, every lyric was related to Jennifer and her current situation. 

It had been extremely cruel of fate to make her hurt like this.

She wiped the wet tears away and tried to look at least presentable. The car had recently come to a stop and Jen realized they were parked on her street. 

“Thank you, you guys. So much, really. The party was great, I…I’m really grateful for having you in my life,” she said hoarsely and leaned in between the two seats to place a kiss on Ginny and Josh’s cheek.

“You’re welcome,” they both replied simultaneously. “Are you sure you’re good to enter your house by yourself?” Josh asked causing Jen to laugh.

“Yes, dad. I’m _fine_.”

She exited the car and watched as they sped away waving at her.

Then, she realized that she was everything _but_ fine.


	17. Pieces of You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Surprise, surprise! I'm here early with a longer chapter for you all! 
> 
> This chapter is rated E and A. You're gonna have to read it and find out what these letters mean ;)
> 
> Enjoy!

**CHAPTER SEVENTEEN**

**Pieces of You**

* * *

 

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

Lana didn't have enough time for Jennifer anymore. A week went by, too slowly for Jen’s liking, and the only opportunity she had to see the brunette was during rehearsals and filming. They spent at least two days during their breaks together, but things were slightly awkward since the party. They didn't talk about it, which Jen realized was kind of a good thing. She didn't want to _think_ about what happened there; she’d rather just forget and pretend Lana wasn't married at all. And as they kissed passionately in her trailer, she tried to focus only on the feel of having Lana for herself without any interruptions from the _husband_ around. 

The days after became extremely difficult for them to be together, especially because Lana started turning down Jen’s every attempt at inviting her over. Her excuses were always the same and it all involved the _husband_. Jennifer was really upset about it. All of this was hurting her so much and sometimes it made her wonder why she was a part of this; why she had said yes to those terms in the first place. 

There was a reason before, in the previous years, when she used to fight so hard against her desires for Lana. They were close friends at first, and then Lana started dating someone and Jen felt the need to avoid her. Her desires were at bay and she couldn't feel like that anymore. It turned out all of her efforts became nothing when they started hanging out frequently a few months ago. Swan Queen had brought them together, somehow. Their desire for each other had always been hidden through the characters of Emma and Regina. All that tension… well, it was them: Jennifer and Lana. And now, Jennifer realized she had caught herself in a trap. The type of trap she had _sworn_ to herself once that she’d never fall into. To love someone taken.

Jennifer had already suffered from Lana once when she first disappeared on the blonde with no explanations. They made it up, and the blonde had been ecstatic to know that Lana was in love with her too, though a little bit reluctant when she realized that the costs of having a relationship with Lana would be at the expenses of her being the brunette’s sort of _mistress_. And then, Lana had assured her that she would be there the next morning, and indeed she was. That promise, however, didn't stick for too long. The party last Saturday was the worst thing; a _nightmare_ , to be precise. Jennifer thought they were fine. She thought everything was fine until… until the husband came in sight, claiming his possession over the woman that Jennifer was in love with.

Things had been awkward between them since then, and the blonde felt hopeless and alone most of the time because Lana wasn't there. There were only cheap excuses being said on the phone, hardly a kiss and Jennifer couldn't help but miss the woman. Lana was hurting her, and the brunette was probably aware of this too, but Jen… _God_ , Jen couldn't help but miss her. Miss _everything_. Lana’s sweet, intoxicating perfume; her smooth hair; her soft, tanned skin that she so loved to touch and tease. Her beautiful smile. The way their bodies felt pressed against each other… _Ugh_. She _resented_ herself for missing Lana, knowing that the brunette was spending her time with her husband all the other times, doing only _God knows what_. It hurt her, it _tortured_ her mind just at the thought of that man touching Lana. It made her angry, so, so _angry_. But she couldn't do anything.

God, this was all too much. She seriously didn't know for how long she would put up with this bullshit.

* * *

 

&

It was Saturday, and thankfully a day off for the whole cast and crew. The rehearsals for the musical episode was taking a lot of their time; there were songs and some dance moves that they had to learn really quickly, and at the same time, also film new scenes for the season. Everything was good at work. _At work, only._ Jen’s love life was still a piece of shit.

She had no plans for today whatsoever, and that was _terrible_. The only thing she wanted was to be with Lana, at least for a while without any interruptions. But the brunette hadn't talked to her yesterday at the set—they actually didn't have enough time to, and that was it. Jen would probably start pining over herself in the mirror at some time soon and fight hard against her own pitying tears. Nonetheless, some tiny part inside of her still hoped that today would be a very nice day if Lana simply showed up at her house by surprise. It was stupid because it was less likely to happen since they haven't been talking much, but still possible. And the fact that a tiny part of her still had hope was a good thing.

It was three in the afternoon when the doorbell rang. Jennifer had been running on the treadmill for an hour now, focusing on her workout routine while watching a show on TV. The doorbell rang once again and Jen’s heart rate increased—despite all the adrenaline of being exercising,—and that tiny part that was still hopeful tinged inside her. Maybe it was Lana… maybe it was not. It was only a possibility.

She jogged to the front door and didn't bother looking first at the peephole such was her eagerness to see who it was. Lana stood on her porch with a bright smile, looking more beautiful than ever. It turned out Jen’s hopeful side was right. She grinned widely at the woman and pulled her in quickly by the wrist, kissing her fervently the minute she was close. 

The brunette chuckled against her mouth and then pulled away a few inches. “Hello to you, too.” 

Jennifer smiled and started kissing her neck this time. _God, she had missed this woman._

“You were working out, I assume,” Lana said as she slid her hands on Jen’s arm back and forth.

“Yes. This feels like a dejà vú, doesn't it?”

“Indeed it does. Except for this time, we’re on good terms.”

Jen pulled away to lock eyes with the brunette. The last thing they were was on _good terms,_ but Jen didn't want to think about that now. Lana had just arrived and she was finally _here_ , in her house again, ready to be _hers._

“How did you know I was at home?” Jen asked, remembering now that Lana had suddenly shown up at her door without telling her first. _Just like old times._

“I texted you, but you didn't reply.” 

The blonde frowned. “Yeah, sorry. I was running on the treadmill and didn't see it.”

“Luckily I came here either way, then.”

Jen nodded eagerly and pulled Lana into a kiss again. God, she wanted so much of this woman right now. She couldn't wait any longer.

“No, lucky _us,_ ” she murmured against plump lips. “Want to join me in a bubble bath?”

“A _bubble_ bath?” Lana questioned with mirth, her eyes already darkening with desire.

“Yes. Water, bubbles and much _more,”_ Jen murmured in her ear.

“That sounds enticing.”

Jennifer smiled and pulled Lana in for another a kiss. They started walking toward the bathroom in between kisses, stumbling on some furniture here and there, and laughing when it happened. When they arrived at Jen’s suite-bathroom, she interrupted the kiss to start preparing the bath. She turned on the water and added the best-scented bath bombs she had. When she turned back to Lana, the brunette had a sexy smirk on her face.

“Can I undress you?” Lana asked, leaning in close to the blonde.

“You don’t even need to ask that.”

The brunette smiled and started undressing Jennifer slowly, her blunt nails raking on her skin and making her shiver. When the blonde was fully naked, it was her turn to start undressing that beautiful woman. She took her time to appreciate the view and learn more of every inch of that stunning body.

Immediately after, she pulled Lana’s body against hers and kissed her fervently, loving the way she moaned against her mouth due to the sudden pressure and sensation of their bare bodies together.

“Ready to get in?” The brunette nodded and they body entered the bathtub at the same time.

“Oh God, this feels so wonderful! Best idea ever,” Lana said as she dove her whole body into the water, except her head.

“It does,” Jen said as she did the same. “You know what feels better, though?” She moved her body underwater closer to the other woman’s.

“Your body against mine?”

The blonde grinned with the assumption and nodded eagerly. “Turn around,” she ordered and the brunette willingly did so. 

Jennifer spread her own legs and adjusted Lana’s sitting form between them. Then, she reached to grab the soap on the shelf on the side and squeezed some into her hand. Her hands started at Lana’s shoulders, before traveling down to her arms, covering the brunette in soft, good-scented bubbles. She watched as Lana closed her eyes and seemed to revel in the feeling. Jen’s hands massaged the soap into her back, down her legs, and up her sides. When her hands found their way to Lana’s stomach, she felt the brunette holding her breath against her. The blonde smiled involuntarily, loving the way Lana felt when she touched her.

Her hands made their way for Lana’s breasts, starting to play with her already hard nipples as she rubbed them in soap. The brunette’s head rolled back and Jen took the opportunity to lean in closer to place a kiss on her neck. Jen could feel her own breasts being pressed against Lana’s back, and couldn't help not rubbing herself against the smooth skin. Jen’s pale lips traveled up to suck on Lana’s earlobe, and as she bit down gently, Lana’s back arched a bit off the blonde’s body.

“Oh, God.”

Jen smiled into Lana’s skin. She didn't say anything as her right hand let go of Lana’s one breast and slid down the brunette’s body. She found herself between damp thighs soon enough, and Lana’s knees buckled when Jen’s fingers started rubbing over her aching folds. She circled Lana’s clit gently, while her other hand still played with those taut nipples. Then, all of a sudden, she stopped, making Lana whimper slightly at the lack of touch.

“There. You’re all clean.”

The brunette half moaned and half chuckled. “Such a tease.”

“I wasn't teasing you, just… _cleaning.”_

“If I remember correctly, _you_ were the one all sweaty that needed some cleaning _.”_

“Well, I guess I still need some cleaning.”

“Let me help you with that.”

Lana pulled her body away from Jennifer’s and turned to her, kneeling on each side of the blonde’s body. She squeezed some soap into her hands and then mirrored what Jen had done before, washing her back, arms, legs and teasing her nipples on the way. Jennifer could only watch her mesmerized as the ache in between her legs increased.

“Can you sit on the top side, please?” Lana asked, pointing to the stoned space available at the topside of the bathtub. “I want to wash you clean. All of you.”

The blonde shivered at that, eagerly standing up to sit on the stone surface of the bathtub. Lana stood up as well and spread Jen’s legs to stand in between them. Then, she leaned in and started a languid kiss, biting onto the blonde’s lips forcefully, causing the latter to moan loudly.

“Do you want me to _clean_ you, Jennifer?” The brunette asked hoarsely in her ear, and _God,_ Lana saying her whole name was an extreme turn on when they were in a position like this.

“Yes, yes, that’s all I need.”

“Good to know,” she murmured, at last, before her plump, hot lips started a trail from her chest to her abs, where she kissed, nibbled and sucked on every piece of skin exposed. 

The brunette started teasing Jen with her mouth around her sex, kissing on the skin close to her clit and causing her to shiver with what would come next. She was growing impatient with all the teasing, feeling the unbearable ache between her legs. Everything Jen wanted was for Lana to lick her for once and for all. She couldn't stand any more teasing. She needed release as soon as possible.

Her right hand grasped on black, wet waves and tugged impatiently, hoping to silently tell Lana what she desperately wanted.

“I see someone is eager.”

“Yes, yes, please, Lana. Just fuck me already!” She pleaded, blushing and cursing under her breath right after the brunette laughed throatily against her core; the sound reverberating through her whole body. 

Jen let out a loud moan when that malicious tongue came in contact with her clit and then slid down to her wet folds, sucking and licking her all over. _God, this woman could use her tongue perfectly, simply in the right places._ Lana had barely started and Jen already knew that she was on the edge, almost ready to come all over that hot mouth.

All it took was those blunt nails to rake on the skin of her abs to her thighs for her to come hard, moaning Lana’s name aloud and sliding off the stoned surface such was the force of her orgasm. When she looked down again after her aftershocks, she saw the pleased smile on Lana’s face and loved the way she was biting onto the skin of her thighs. _Fuck, this woman was a goddess; a professional at everything she does._

“Do you feel clean now?” The brunette asked mockingly, causing Jen to roll her eyes playfully at her.

“Yes, I do,” she said and then slid off from where she was sitting and fell right back into the water. “Now it’s your turn.”

“Gladly,” the brunette said with a smirk as Jennifer pulled her closer so she could kneel with the blonde’s thigh between her legs. “Hmm, that feels good,” she said when the blonde moved her thigh a little, causing the contact to rub against Lana’s sex.

“Move back and forth so we can have some fun underwater,” Jen suggested, watching as Lana’s eyes squinted at her but then she obeyed. “How does it feel?”

“Delicious, but I need more.”

“Yeah, I know you do,” Jen winked at the brunette who just gasped in response. “Bend over a little and hold onto my neck,” Lana moved without any questions as Jen continued, “I want you to rub only your clit on my leg, and the rest…” She leaned in to whisper in Lana’s ear. “The rest is up to me.”

Jennifer caressed both of Lana’s ass cheeks and then squeezed them together, pushing the brunette to rub harder against her leg. Her right hand found its way lower and entered a single finger inside of Lana without preamble. The brunette moaned in her ear, adjusting quickly to the finger inside of her and following Jen’s rhythm as she began to thrust into her pussy. Lana’s walls were already clenching around her finger, so she knew the woman was close. Jen started kissing the brunette’s exposed neck, and soon her teeth met the warm skin and started biting and sucking, eager to leave a mark there; a mark that would say that Lana was  _hers,_ at least for tonight.

The brunette’s arms held her tighter, her movements became more frantic and with one last hard bite onto her neck, Lana came undone, moaning Jen’s name aloud countless times in her ear. She didn't even say a thing about the blonde biting on her neck. Lana just lost herself completely as the strong orgasm shook her entire body. 

Her movements stopped after a while and Jennifer withdrew her finger from inside of her to caress her ass cheeks gently. Lana was still gasping in her ear, trying to regain her breathing as she held Jen tightly close. The blonde placed chaste kisses on the brunette’s neck, noticing how the spot she had just bit turned a strong colour of red. Lana could be mad at her later, but right now, she still seemed to be in her orgasmic bliss.

* * *

 

&

They spent at least twenty minutes more relaxing and bathing each other in the bathtub, and when they finally left, Jen put on a white robe and offered another to Lana.

“No clothes?” The brunette asked when Jennifer handed her the robe.

“Why do we need clothes? They’re overrated.”

Lana chuckled and that was music to Jen’s ears. “Fair enough.”

“I think I’m not done with you yet, Parrilla,” Jen said as she approached the brunette with slow steps.

“I already figured that you are an insatiable woman,” Lana said as she stepped backward the same time Jennifer stepped forward.

In a sudden movement, they were both out of the bathroom suite and rolling on top of each other on Jen’s bed while kissing passionately. God, Lana’s body was heaven and it felt like _home_ ; and those goddamn sweet lips that she wanted to taste and kiss all the time… _Insatiable_ really defined her right now _._ She always wanted more. One taste was never enough. Jennifer was going crazy for more of Lana’s love. What they had now could soon not be enough. It would _never_ be enough.

A loud ringtone rang in the room and they parted the heated kiss. They both looked at each other, waiting expectantly for one to move.

“I think that’s my cellphone ringing,” Lana said.

“You really wanna pick it up?” Jennifer asked as she placed open-mouthed kisses on Lana’s neck.

“I have to. It could be something important.” 

The brunette pushed Jen gently to the side and stood up to look for her phone. Jennifer watched her with a lazy smile on her face. When Lana finally found it, she stared for a few seconds at the screen before looking up at Jennifer with her body tense. The blonde immediately sensed that something was up and propped herself on her elbows.

“I’ll have to take this. Give me a minute.”

Lana started walking away, but Jen’s voice made her stop in her tracks, “You’re not going to tell me who it is?” The brunette’s shoulder sagged and Jennifer knew instantly who it was. “Is it him?”

It took a while for Lana to turn back to her. “Yes.”

Jennifer’s previous joyous mood disappeared completely as she stared into those dark orbs that were now filled with guilt.

“Give me a minute, okay?” Jen only nodded and watched in distress as Lana disappeared into the hallway.

She let her body fall onto the mattress, sighing tiredly as she faced the white ceiling. Life simply _sucked_ right now. Why did the husband have to call right when Lana was with her? Why fate _hated_ her so much?

She glared at the ceiling whilst trying to control her instincts to snap at someone. Jen had to calm the fuck down because this was too bad already, and she knew that if she opened her mouth to complain, she wouldn't stop and some harsh words would come out. Jen didn't want to hurt Lana. She only wanted the brunette to stop hurting _her_.

Three whole minutes had passed, and Jen was already trying to accept the fact that Lana would probably leave right after ending the call and commanded her body and mind not to lash out when the brunette reappeared to tell her.

Seconds after, Lana reentered the bedroom with a tentative smile on her face. Jen watched her every move as she laid beside her on the bed.

She couldn't wait any longer for a response, so she quickly blurted out her question:

“Are you going to stay the night?” She sounded harsher than she intended. But that was because she was already waiting for a negative response.

“Yes, of course. Well, if you want me to, that is.”

“Of course I do, Lana,” Jen said with a sigh. “I just…don’t want any _interruptions_ anymore, okay?”

“I’ll turn off my phone.”

The blonde nodded in agreement and averted her eyes from those dark brown. She was hurting and she didn't want it to be transparent to the _cause_ of her pain. However, she wasn't expecting for Lana to scoot in closer and drape an arm over her waist. The gesture was so affectionate that it made Jennifer’s body relax a little.

“I’m sorry,” Lana said, but Jen still didn't look at her eyes. “Look at me, please.”

Jen looked at her, though not able to suppress the huffy expression she knew she had on her face. “What are you sorry for?” The blonde had the audacity to ask because she wanted to hear everything from Lana’s mouth; wanted to hear what she was really sorry for.

“For not being here, for turning out your attempts at invites, for not talking to you properly and…for the party last Saturday.”

“You already said sorry for the party,” Jen stated quietly.

“I know, but I…I can’t help saying it again.”

Jennifer didn't say anything in response. What could she say? That she had been crying in front of the mirror the days after the party, and resenting herself for having started something with someone that was already taken?

“I promise I’ll try to be more present from now on.”

The blonde sighed, fighting back tears and her sulking mood. “I hope you keep up to your promises.”

Lana grasped on her chin and pressed a kiss onto her lips. “Don’t be angry with me.”

“I am not _angry_.”

“You are, Jennifer.”

Jen pushed Lana’s hand on her chin to the side and then said, “Well, try to put yourself in my shoes, for example. We barely see each other anymore at work, and yes, I know we can’t do nothing about it, but there’s also the nights _after_ work. I thought you would come back to my place with me one of these days, but it turns out you didn't. And you never tried to and it’s been a _week_ , Lana. A week and you’re never here.”

The brunette sighed and then said sharply, “I’m here now, aren't I?”

“Yeah, just for one night,” Jen replied just as sharp. She was getting really annoyed by this conversation.

“I told you since the beginning-”

“I know what you told me, so please don’t ask me not to be angry right now. It’s my right to be at least upset because I don’t have _you_.”

“You have me-”

“Not _completely,_ and you told me that in the beginning, too.”

Lana sighed and pulled away, causing Jen to feel cold at the immediate loss of contact.

“We both know that this is very complicated, Jennifer.”

“Tell me something new,” the blonde said bitterly.

Lana sighed again. “Jen, I swear to you that I am trying my best here.”

“Are you, really?” She asked dryly.

“Of course I am! Our situation is not easy, especially because I am married-”

“Don’t say that. Stop repeating it like an excuse!”

“It is not an excuse, Jennifer. It’s _reality_!”

“A fucked up reality that I would rather get away from.”

Lana pulled Jen’s face toward her and their eyes met again. “You know that I love you, right?” Jennifer gulped and then nodded reluctantly. “So please, let’s forget this. Let’s enjoy what we currently have because…well, it took a long time for us to be in this position and I know you’re aware of that.”

“Yeah,” the blonde muttered, finding out how cracked her voice was becoming.

“Can we revel in the feeling of both of us finally…being together?” Jen nodded, even though she knew that this _together_ only meant _half,_ and that was not enough for her. 

Her body was still tense when Lana snuggled against her side. “Can you hug me back, please?”

Jennifer smiled instinctively and then hugged Lana tightly, pulling her petite body against hers and holding her firmly. Lana was right. She had to revel in this feeling that she never thought she’d have with this woman. Them, together, even if the word _together_ didn't mean enough in their situation.

* * *

 

&

Lana didn't keep up with her promises.

Another week went by and the only thing Jennifer received were apologies and cheap excuses. _Again._

They were working hard at the set every day. Jennifer had noticed once or twice that Lana really tried to approach and at least talk to her for some minutes. However, someone always interrupted them. It was like fate was prohibiting them from seeing each other. It was like everything was against them being together.

One night, Jennifer had been surprised to receive a call from Lana. It went like this:

“Hey, you,” she said, not able to contain her happy smile.

_“Hey, Jen. I’m calling you to tell I might be able to sleep over at your house tomorrow.”_

The blonde shined with the news. Maybe fate was finally being kind to her.

“That’s great! I can’t wait.”

_“Me neither. After work is a good time?”_

“Yes, anytime you want.”

_“That’s tempting. I wish we had longer breaks so we could enjoy as we did before.”_

“Me too. Everything sucks right now.”

_“Not everything. I’ll be there tomorrow, okay?”_

“Okay.”

Jen didn't want the call to end. It was the first time it had happened and Lana already seemed to have to go somewhere else.

_“Sleep well! Xoxo.”_

Lana didn't even wait for a response. She just hung up and Jennifer kept staring at the phone for a while until it blacked out. She was hoping Lana would call again, but no. That didn't happen.

And on the next day, the blonde realized that fate wasn't really being kind to her. There was another call just after she got home from work:

“Lana?”

_“Jen, I’m so sorry.”_

Jennifer hated these apologies. They sometimes meant _nothing_ to her.

“Why are you apologizing?”

_“Something came up and I won’t be able to sleep over at your house tonight.”_

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

“What came up?”

Lana sighed on the other side of the line. _“Do you really want to know?”_

“Yes,” she answered with gritted teeth. Jennifer knew she was going to be hurt with whatever Lana was going to say.

_“Fred and I…we-we have an event to attend tonight. It’s related to his company.”_

Jen closed her eyes once again, trying to calm down; trying to be a nice person and not _lash out._

_“Jen, are you there?”_

She wished she wasn’t, to be honest.

_“Hey babe, are you ready to go?”_ A different voice sound on the other side and the blonde knew instantly that it was _him._ She heard some noise and realized that Lana was probably trying to cover the phone’s speakers. However, that didn't stop the blonde from hearing the rest. _“Who are you talking to?”_

And that was the final straw for her. She hung up immediately, realizing only after that tears had rolled down on her cheeks. She wiped them right away, angry at herself for being so _stupid;_ so in love with someone that she was never supposed to fall for. She was never supposed to get into this mess. Jennifer couldn’t be someone’s mistress. She deserved better than this; much better than being considered someone’s second option.

She would have to talk to Lana about it. She’d have to tell her exactly how she was feeling and how much she couldn't bear witnessing her with someone else. If the other woman wasn't able to drop this husband of hers for Jennifer, the blonde would have to make drastic decisions. Those kinds of decisions that would break her fragile heart even more; decisions that would hurt many, many people.

* * *

 

&

It was a few days later when Lana called her again and told her if she could sleep over at her house after work. Jennifer had agreed immediately, ready to use this opportunity to talk to the brunette once and for all.

The minutes passed quickly and finally, it was the time the brunette would arrive. Jen was feeling so nervous; her hands were even sweating a bit. She knew this wasn't going to be easy. Their situation had _never_ been easy, since from the start. Now, she would see what would come out of it or if it would be broken, at last.

When the doorbell rang, she quickly walked over to the front door and faced a shy, smiling Lana. 

“Hey,” the brunette greeted.

“Hi. Uh, come in.”

Lana leaned in close, wrapped her arms around Jen’s waist and pressed a gentle kiss onto her lips. The blonde savoured the feeling of having the other woman so close, being so affectionate once again. When Lana’s kisses turned more heated and she pushed the blonde towards the nearest couch, Jennifer expected herself to refuse, or stop right away, but unfortunately, she wasn't so strong right now. She let herself be pushed and relished this rare moment that could easily slip away from her grasp any time soon.

The brunette straddled Jen’s body on the couch, seeming eager to engage in something much more intimate as she grasped on blonde locks and bit on Jen’s lower lip. Jennifer couldn't say she wasn't loving this. She simply loved every piece of Lana Parrilla. Be that as it may, she had still to remain focused on the serious conversation she wanted to have with the brunette. 

She parted their kiss abruptly and cradled Lana’s face in her hands to look deeply into her eyes. It was time to start talking about the elephant in the room.

“Are you okay?” The brunette asked with concern in her eyes.

“No, I’m not,” Jen sighed and then let go of Lana’s face. “We need to talk.”

She watched as the brunette gulped loudly and moved to sit on the couch beside her.

“What do you want to talk about?”

“Somehow I thought you would already know how I felt. Guess I was being too naive.”

“Jen,” the brunette sighed, seeming distraught. “I kind of have a feeling what this conversation might be about, but I just didn't want to assume things right away.”

“Alright. Fair enough,” Jen started fidgeting with the fingers of her hands, feeling the dampness of sweat on her skin. 

“Are you going to tell me what is bothering you?” Lana persisted, and the blonde turned to look at her, feeling a little bit distraught herself.

“Yes, it’s just… _complicated_. Everything related to us is complicated, and I can’t do complicated.”

That wasn't what she imagined to say _at all._ She had mentally prepared a small speech, but it turned out she was too nervous to remember the eloquent words.

“What do you mean?”

The blonde sighed. “Our situation, our _relationship_ of sorts is not working. It’s too complicated for me,” Lana just blinked and seemed to silently beg for her to continue. “Being your… _mistress_ is too complicated. It’s…it’s not what I want to be.”

“I thought you were willing to try when we first discussed this,” the brunette added quietly.

“Oh, I was. I did try, actually. We spent, what? A month with this new arrangement and most of the time you spent _away_ from me.”

“Jen, that’s not true. We-”

“It’s not _true?_ How come not? You can’t count the times at work that I barely saw you during rehearsals and takes.”

Lana sighed, averting her eyes. “The first week was great. We spent a lot of time together at work.”

“At _work,_ only. I thought it would be enough for some time, but it wasn’t. You suddenly had other things to do with your husband, and I became the second option.”

“No, of course not, Jennifer. I never wanted you to feel like a second option.”

“I’m glad you at least wanted me not to _feel_ like this. Except I did, and I still do. That’s why it’s not working.”

“I tried too, you know? I want to be here with you so bad. I’ve told you before how everything feels when I’m with you. But things are not easy. I have someone else.”

“Yes, I know. That’s why the only way of us to continue being together is if you dump this someone else.”

Lana widened her eyes. Jen watched in mild annoyance as the brunette opened and shut her mouth a few times, at a loss for words.

“Jen-”

“Are you going to leave him?” She interrupted her.

“What-”

“That’s the only thing I ask of you, Lana. Only thing.”

“It’s not a simple thing, Jennifer. I can’t just end my marriage with him-”

“Do you love him?”

“Of course I love him, but I also love _you.”_

Jennifer sighed, exasperated _._ “Don’t you understand that I _can’t_ live like this anymore? I don’t want _pieces_ of you, Lana. I want the whole package. I want us to be serious.”

“I told you how it would be in the beginning.”

“I hate that. I hate what you said in the beginning! I’m tired of being replaced. This is not healthy. I hate it and I can’t keep living like this. I don’t want to _share_.”

The brunette exhaled loudly. “Jennifer, you know that I have a _family_ with him-”

“So?”

“It’s not that easy, okay?!” Lana stood up and started pacing in the room, looking very agitated.

“I know it’s not. You shouldn't have started this relationship with me, then.”

There was hurt in Lana’s eyes, but she remained impassible at Jen’s words. “ _I_ shouldn't have?”

“Yes. You were the one with all the ideas and rehearsal dates. While doing that, you also toyed with my _heart,_ ” the blonde accused.

“So all of this is _my_ fault, now?”

“Yes, Lana,” Jennifer stood up as well to face the brunette. “I fell in love with someone taken, and now I’ll be paying the price because you’re going to choose _him_ over me.”

“I don’t want to _choose_ , Jennifer. Can’t you see how hard this is for me?”

“Can’t you see how _selfish_ you are?” She accused harshly. “My heart is in _pieces_ because of you and you don’t give a fuck! This is over, Lana. You chose _him_.”

“No, I didn't choose him-” Lana tried to reach out for her, but the blonde dodged away.

“You did. If you can’t leave him for me, you are automatically choosing him.”

“Jen, please, you have to understand my situation-”

“It won’t work for me this way, Lana. I’m _tired_.”

Lana looked down for a moment and then murmured almost out of breath, as tears started welling in her eyes, “There’s always another way, Jennifer.”

“Of course there is another way. But you’re not willing to take the risk and I won’t sit here and wait like a fool. I’m done with this.”

“You’re…done?” Lana asked, her voice quivering.

“Yes.”

“Jen, I can’t-”

“Stop, I don’t want excuses. This is over.”

It pained Jen to no end to say the word _over._ She had hope that Lana would choose her instead. It turned out she was wrong, after all.

“You have to leave, now.”

Lana took in a sharp breath and then said, “I don’t want to leave things this way between us.”

“You’ve made your decision, Lana. There’s nothing else for you to do here.”

Tears slid on the brunette’s cheek and Jen had to swallow the lump in her throat and the will to cry in front of her co-star. She was stronger than this. She couldn't cry. Not right now, at least.

“Leave, please.”

And what seemed ages later, Lana finally started moving, walking away from Jen, leaving her alone with her crushed heart and torment.

It was over. 

Everything was over between them and Jennifer felt lost.

Lost and alone with a hopeless love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> E is definitely for EXPLICIT.  
> And A is, unfortunately, for ANGST.
> 
> I'M DEEPLY SORRY YOU GUYS


	18. Cruel Decisions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I'm very sorry for not posting earlier. I had a very busy week, yesterday was Election Day and today is my birthday ;)
> 
> I also had a little bit of a writer's block on this chapter. I don't like it at all, seriously. I lost count of the times I erased paragraphs that I wasn't happy with. Hopefully, you guys will like it the way it is now.
> 
> THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS SPOILERS!!!!!
> 
> PS: writing Morrilla fanfiction is fucking hard, just so you know. I had to watch that shitty wedding all over again to write this chapter. I suffered, but now it's ready for you all to read.

**CHAPTER EIGHTEEN**

**Cruel Decision**  
****

* * *

**_Jennifer’s Point of View_ **

A week ago, Jennifer had ended her relationship with Lana. 

A week ago, Jennifer had suffered alone at home. It hit her _hard_. Lana’s words repeated in her head like a mantra and it felt like nails and hammers were breaking her heart apart. The first day didn't even feel real, to be honest. But she tried to be as strong as possible and move on.

A week ago, Jennifer made a decision: she would not re-sign her contract with OUAT. She couldn't bear the pain of being a couple with Lana on TV and not in real life. It would be too much and she would _not_ be a part of that only to hurt herself even more. Jennifer knew exactly what was _in the_ _way_ of her recent decision, and she also knew that it would hurt Lana just as much as she hurt Jennifer. The blonde knew how important Swan Queen was for Lana, and ending all of that would crush the brunette’s heart. _Just like it had crushed Jennifer’s._

She wasn't proud of her decision. Not at all. She loved Swan Queen too. But she couldn't take this anymore. Her heart was in pieces and there was no other choice. Now, not only she and Lana would suffer, but also the Swan Queen fandom who had waited so long for something to happen.

It was over. Once Upon A Time was over for her and so was Lana Parrilla. And in the process, Swan Queen would never be canon and neither endgame.

.

.

Four days ago, she told her decision to Adam and Eddy:

_“Sorry, what did you say?” Eddy asked with a frown on his forehead._

_“I can’t re-sign the contract. I…I’ve made a difficult decision and I’ve decided to move on.”_

_“But…but Jennifer, I thought you were happy with Swan Queen being endgame. I thought you wanted to continue being part of this,” Adam stuttered, looking worried._

_“I do, I did. But I can’t anymore, it’s…it’s my decision.”_

_“Something happened that you’re not telling us?” Eddy asked, his voice low and careful. He knew not to push into personal matters, especially when it came to Jennifer._

_“Yes, something happened, but that’s part of my personal life. I’m very sorry but I can’t re-sign the contract and be part of season seven.”_

_“As much as it hurts, we can’t do nothing but accept your decision. Whatever happened, Jen, I’m very sorry too,” Adam said, contemplative._

_Jen nodded at him and then looked at Eddy, who had been quiet for a few minutes._

_“Jennifer,” he started. “You know that if you decide to leave, we’ll have to change plots and Swan Queen will be out of the picture.”_

_She sighed, feeling impatient and wanting this conversation to be over as soon as possible. “I know that.”_

_“So you’re also aware that we’ll have to make Captain Swan endgame.”_

_She knew that before, but now that it was being said out loud, it crushed her heart one more time. To be honest, Jennifer never wanted Captain Swan to be endgame. Not after what Hook caused to Emma. But now… now things were sharp and complicated. She had no other choice but to leave and stay away from Lana and the romantic couple they once would be on TV._

_“I know that, too,” she nodded. “You guys do whatever it is necessary for the show. I’ll just go with it.”_

_Adam and Eddy shared looks that the blonde couldn’t quite understand what it meant._

_“Have you talked to Lana?”_

_That familiar sting in her heart made itself noticeable. This happened every time someone mentioned Lana or when she even caught herself thinking about her._

_“No, I haven’t,” she answered._

_“You should do that, then,” Eddy said. “I think she’ll be very sad with your decision.”_

_Her expression hardened, as she knew very well how sad Lana would be. The writers, however, didn't know that Jennifer was also extremely sad for making this decision and that all of this only happened because of Lana. It was her fault, not Jennifer’s._

_Oh, if they knew._

_“I’m sure she will,” she said dryly and then turned to walk away from the office._

.

.

Three days ago, she told her decision to Lana:

_Jennifer texted her co-star with short, simple words._

**We need to talk. Meet me in my trailer if you want to hear me.**

_The brunette didn't even reply. Barely minutes later, there was a knock on Jennifer’s trailer door. It was Lana, smiling tentatively just like the last time she knocked on her door._

_Last time had been the end, and this time, it was the end of the ends because Jennifer knew what she would cause to Lana with her new decision._

_“Hi. You said you wanted to talk.”_

_Lana seemed hopeful. Maybe she was thinking that Jen had changed her mind and now wanted to be together again in that awful, twisted kind of relationship they had._

_“I’ve made a decision,” she said sharply, observing as Lana didn't even flinch. The brunette stepped forward instead, with that tentative smile still on her face. Jennifer stepped backward instantly and then continued, “I won’t stay for season seven. I won’t re-sign the contract. Swan Queen won’t happen.”_

_Lana’s smile was gone in instants as surprise flooded on her features, turning into a chagrined expression right after._

_“What?” Lana’s voice wavered, and that showed Jennifer exactly how much she was in pain with the news._

_“It’s exactly what you just heard. My decision is made.”_

_“No, you can’t do that. Where’s your compromise with the show? You’re gonna let what happened between us interfere in your professional work?” Lana accused, her words getting harsher each second._

_“Yes, I can do that. I’ve been on the show for six years, and my contract is about to expire at the end of this season. The decision is already made and you can’t do nothing about it.”_

_Lana looked miserable right now. She looked extremely unhappy and mournful. Jen could also notice how hard the brunette was fighting against her own tears._

_“Why are you doing this?”_

_“It’s not worth staying.”_

_Lana’s jaw tightened and she asked coldly, “Are you even aware of how much your stupid decision will hurt the fans? Do you even think about them?”_

_Jen shrugged in ignorance. She didn't have time for Lana’s crappy speech. “I have to move on.”_

_“Are you seriously considering this?”_

_“I’m not considering it, it’s already done. I talked to Adam and Eddy. It’s over.”_

_Lana stood there, motionless in front of her; eyes brimming with unwanted tears and hands turned into fists. Jen was receiving a fulminating glare from her co-star; that kind of glare that Regina Mills usually let it show. She had never seen this look on Lana, though._

_The brunette took a small step forward, her hands still into fists.“You don’t care about Swan Queen,” she accused sharply. “You don’t care about our characters and how perfect they are for each other. Right now, I think the truth is that you never cared a bit about them or the LGBT community.”_

_Jennifer stayed silent. Maybe she even deserved those harsh accusations. Maybe her decision to leave the show hadn't been a reasonable one. Maybe it has. Jennifer was after her happiness, and being a TV couple with Lana wasn't the right choice._

_“You were right,” her co-star continued. “Nothing should ever have happened between us. It was a huge mistake.”_

_Tears rolled down on Lana’s cheeks, but her eyes remained inscrutable. In a sudden, she turned and left with no more words._

_Jennifer couldn't help but think that love, overall, was a mistake people often committed._

_Now, all she had to do was fall out of love with Lana Parrilla._

_Jennifer really hoped that was possible._

_._

_._

Two days ago, Jennifer announced her departure from the show to the whole cast and crew. People were shocked, especially Jared, Colin, Ginny, and Josh. Lana was there too, but she didn't bat an eye at the blonde. Ginny and Josh simply sensed that something was off and quickly walked to Jen to know what had happened:

_“Are you really going to leave the show?” Josh asked, concerned. He also knew that her departure would define the end of this season._

_“Yes,” she responded shortly, swallowing the lump in her throat._

_“Why?” Ginny asked, reaching out to hold the blonde’s hand comfortingly._

_“Same reason you guys are leaving. I have to move on.”_

_Ginny narrowed her eyes at Jen, suddenly seeming to have figured it all out._

_“There’s something more in this decision of yours that you’re not telling us. But it’s okay, we won’t push it,” the brunette glanced at Josh for a second, and turned her head again to face Jen. “Just know that if you need someone, we’re here.”_

_She nodded. Words wouldn't come out. If it did, she might just cry in front of them and all the others around._

.

.

There were only four episodes left for them to film the end of the sixth season. The songs of the musical episode were also ready to be recorded. The scripts were going to be delivered today and they would have a final notice of how this season would end. Jennifer felt particularly nervous about it. She also felt hopeless and didn't know what to expect. Before she had told the writers she would be leaving the show, she assumed they had all figured out for Swan Queen. Now, however, they had to plan something else that didn't involve Emma or Swan Queen on the seventh season. Despite that, Jen was more worried about the end of the current season. She had some ideas of what would come, but couldn't help feeling nervous. The last episode of this season was going to be related to Emma and Hook, and that was the cause of her anxiety. That and also what could come with it.

Her heart raced uncontrollably when she received a text from Eddy, telling her to visit their office to receive the script:

_Jennifer tentatively opened the door of A &E’s office, finding them sitting quietly while they looked at the person sitting stiffly in front of them. That person was Lana Parrilla. Of course it was her. Jennifer’s heart rate only increased at the sight of her former lover._

_“Lana told me you two talked about your decision, Jennifer,” Eddy commented, his expression calm._

_“Yes, we talked about it,” she replied, managing to look as calm as him despite her heart being on a marathon._

_“Good to know. The new scripts are ready to be delivered to everyone. However, we needed you here to talk about a particular topic.”_

_The blonde sighed, wondering what else would come out of this._

_“It’s something simple, don’t worry,” Adam added. “It was your decision, Jen. There’s no problem in that, we assure you,” she nodded at them. “Despite that, we wanted to leave a bit of Swan Queen still on the show. Or at least give the public an idea that it could have happened some way.”_

_Jennifer gulped, wondering what the writers had in mind this time. Hopefully, there would be no touching between Emma and Regina. Jen didn't know if she could control herself not to give in again._

_“Since the previous seasons, there were always some hints, especially those coming from Regina. She was never fond of Emma’s and Hook’s relationship, and sometimes could be even seen as jealous. We want to emphasize that again,” Eddy explained. “Lana, we added a few things to your script only. Some details that we think it’s important, especially on some significant scenes we wrote.”_

_“I’ll have to be jealous of Emma?” Lana asked, her expression blank._

_“Yes. We want to insert a situation in the background in which Regina is secretly in love with Emma, but Emma doesn't know that. Our aim is for the public to assume that Regina feels something more than friendship for Emma.”_

_“Sounds acceptable,” Lana said curtly and then glared at Jennifer for a few seconds. The blonde returned the glare, even if she knew they were being watched by their bosses._

_Adam or Eddy could definitely be brave enough to ask them if something had happened. But that didn't occur. The writers didn't push it, didn't meddle in their personal lives which Jennifer was very grateful for._

_._

_._

A day ago, the most heart-crushing news was released to the world:

_The image was simple. Just a hook with two wedding rings hung around it. She stared at that image for a long time as tears rolled down on her face. That was not what she wanted. It never was. But now it was happening because she had made a decision. This hurtful image was all her fault. Emma Swan was going to get married to Captain Hook, and that was going to be her fucking endgame. A lifeless soul of a character. Jennifer felt guilty about it. But still, she would never have chosen differently. It hurt immensely being the ‘bad one’ in this situation, but she knew that she wouldn't be able to be a fake couple around Lana. Their relationship had fucked her up, and now she had to move on. That was the only choice._

* * *

 

&

The days after that, everything was hectic on the set. Jennifer felt anxious most of the time during filming, especially the scenes that involved Emma’s wedding. As the professional actress she is, she tried to look content with what was happening. That didn't work very well. Behind the masked smile she wore on her face, there were sadness and heartbreak. When her eyes met Lana’s through the room, she would avert quickly, hardening her expression right after. The cast and crew noticed her behaviour, but no one dared to say anything back. 

Before any of the next episodes were filmed, they recorded the songs for the musical episode. The songs were amazing, literally. But what entailed in the episode was the worst and she didn't feel ready to dive into action yet. 

Right now, she was reading the lines of her first scene of the day which was going to be with Ginny, Jared, Rebecca, and Lana. It was the scene that caused her to grit her teeth as she read the lyrics. 

Regina would mutter an _‘Emma’_ the way only she knows. And then, she would say, _‘I’m happy for you, I really am’_ and they would hug. The Swan Queen hug was finally going to be filmed, only this time, over the worst circumstances possible.

When they were ready to film that scene, Jennifer didn't know that Lana’s surprised face was scripted. Sharp claws surrounded her heart but she remained her expression the way it was supposed to be; seeking for Regina’s praise. However, the tears she saw in those brown eyes and the hurtful expression Lana/Regina tried to hide was painful enough. And the hug, _God_ , the hug. It lasted barely three-seconds. The way Lana pressed the side of her head fondly against Jen’s caused her to _swoon_. Luckily the scene turned back to normal right after, so Jennifer could finally breathe properly.

* * *

 

&

Jennifer was dressed in Emma Swan’s wedding dress. They were all settled to start filming the scene of the wedding. Jen’s heart raced in her chest, her hands were sweating with nervousness. When Lana walked in, dressed in a tight white and burgundy dress, her breath caught in her throat. For a moment, she desired to be marrying that woman right now.

Their eyes met through the room, and this time, Jennifer couldn't avert it. Those brown eyes were so intense, and so intimidating at the same time. It freaked her out completely.

Someone snapped their fingers in front of her face, and she realized it was Colin.

“They’re calling us. We’re gonna start.”

She nodded and they moved on to their positions. Ginny and Josh walked her down the aisle and Jen could feel everyone’s eyes on her. She was trying to keep up with her masked face, but it was turning to be extremely hard. She was feeling on the verge of a panic attack, and everyone around her was expecting her to be a good actress, so she had to focus. Her mask slipped for a second or two when she was face to face with Colin, in the altar.

She started breathing calmly again when they started singing the song _A Happy Beginning_ and dancing to the choreography. Jennifer did everything she had to do, planting a smile on the face and pretending all of this was the happy beginning she really wanted for her character and for _herself._ During the choreography, Jen was surprised when Lana appeared by her side, their shoulders almost touching. She stiffened instantly but kept the happy mask on her face as she sang the song.

When all of that mess was finally over, she took some deep, long breaths and drank at least two full glass of water to calm herself.

She shouldn't be feeling like this.

* * *

 

&

It was dark, they were filming during the night and this was the last Swan Queen scene she would film; at least she hoped. The scene involved Emma Swan in Hook’s arms and Regina would pull her hand, drag her to the other side of the street to give her a pep talk. Jennifer felt very nervous about how this scene would go. She glanced at Lana for a second and realized how fidgety she was.

Suddenly, it was time to start:

Lana touched her wrist briefly and walked over to the side, hoping for Jennifer to follow.

_“Remember when you first came to Storybrooke?”_ Lana looked to the side, seeming a little distraught. _“We hated each other-”_

_“Regina-”_

_“No, it’s true. I was Henry’s mother but you said you were. And… we fought. And, oh boy, did we ever fight,”_ Lana laughed dryly, and Jen really wanted to laugh too, but she couldn't even bring herself to feel humorous. _“But you found a third way,”_ she saw tears brimming in those brown eyes. _“We were both his mother.”_

Jennifer smiled faintly and the brunette continued, looking more composed:

_“Earlier today I saw my evil half… be selfless. She saved us all, I never saw that coming just like however you’re going to get out of this. You haven't seen yet but you will.”_

_“Sounds like you’re talking about hope.”_

_“Something you taught me all those years ago when you didn't give up on me.”_

Jennifer looked down and then asked, _“What should I do?”_

_“You’ll know when the time comes.”_

And that was it. Their final scene, she supposed.

When the whole scene with every one of the cast that night was done, Josh and Ginny embraced each other with tears in their eyes. When they parted, they invited Jen into the embrace, which she gladly accepted. That time, she couldn't hold back her own tears. When she opened her wet eyes again, she realized that every one of the cast was hugging them, including Lana.

* * *

 

&

It turned out the writers came up with another Swan Queen scene. It would be after dinner at Granny’s. Emma and Regina would take Henry to school, together, as a family. And that was so beautiful. 

For a moment, during the filming of the scene, after she and Lana each placed a kiss on Jared’s forehead, their eyes locked onto each other’s and they smiled. Jennifer didn't know why she was smiling. Neither why Lana was suddenly smiling at her. But that moment felt so precious, so… _real_. 

At that moment, Jennifer forgot all about that Captain Swan wedding and pretended for a second that everything was good between Lana and her; pretended that they were still together, and this time, with no _husband_ to worry about.

Jennifer only snapped out of her wide smiling after the director made a signal with his fingers so she and Lana would move on to end the scene.

And they did end the scene.

Their last scene.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are only two more chapters of this story. Be patient, people. I promise you some kind of happy beginning for our lovely ladies ;)


	19. I Want You Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I'm so sorry it took me this long. The past two weeks have been crazy for me, seriously. I didn't have enough time to write, but it's finally ready!
> 
> ABOUT THE CHAPTER:
> 
> This chapter is Lana’s POV, so you will know how she felt about everything and how things will move on after what happened with Jennifer. The time scale here is FAST, so keep up with the changes. All of this, and all the time it passes it’s necessary for the next chapter and the end of the story.
> 
> A very important reminder that this is NOT REAL, alright everyone? These are just THEORIES of mine just for you all to have some fun. I like having these theories because I’m such a Morrilla trash ;)
> 
> That being said, ENJOY IT, EVERYONE!

** CHAPTER NINETEEN **

**I Want You Back**

* * *

 

 

**_Lana’s Point of View_ **

If Lana had to describe the situation of her life right now, the word she would use was _disastrous_. Which was probably a hyperbole; it was not _that_ bad, right? Well, it had been kind of _unbearable_ since the day a certain _blonde_ decided to leave the show.

It was on the second half of season 6 that everything started: Swan Queen was declared canon, and the news made her the happiest woman alive. It was what she had wanted for Regina’s future for so long; knowing that it would finally happen felt like eyedrops for sore eyes. And her co-star Jennifer accepted it easily, so the brunette felt even better.

Lana had become so incredibly happy with the news that she didn't realize all of her repressed feelings for a certain _blonde_ came back on full circle. Her actions now could be seen as very _reckless;_ Lana had incited her co-star for _many_ unnecessary rehearsals. Being near Jennifer had always been difficult, since the beginning of the show. Their heavy tension was always present, regardless of them wanting to acknowledge it or not. And then, when Lana realized what she had gotten herself into, it was already too late. 

Her attraction to her co-star had always existed. In spite of that, in the beginning, she decided to keep those feelings hidden deep inside of her because they simply weren’t what she was supposed to be feeling. Getting herself involved with a co-star had never been her plan. Therefore, her control had disappeared from her hands when Swan Queen was declared canon and Lana found herself wanting to spend as much time as she could with her co-star. As rehearsals progressed, they got closer and closer; too close, to be precise. Lana had to admit that everything was mostly incited by her; she was always the one asking Jennifer to hang out, or telling her that they should rehearse before filming started. Back then, it seemed like her co-star didn't get any hint of what Lana wanted. Neither Lana knew exactly what she wanted at the time. And Jennifer could very well have been avoiding her flirtations because Lana was married.

Well, her _married_ status had been forgotten many times by the brunette. Especially when she spent time with Jennifer. Her relationship with her husband had become the most boring and monotonous ever. It had been this way even before she and Jennifer started hanging out; so after that, it became even _worse_. Fred was always traveling around the globe because of his job, and Lana was always busy with her own job in Vancouver. Some days she spent the whole night on set, rehearsing and filming countless times for it to be perfect and when she got home, he was never there. Their schedule rarely matched.

Nevertheless, that was in the past now. Things have changed in these two months; they have changed drastically causing Lana to feel completely torn apart by the recent events of her life.

Every certainty she had before was suddenly torn apart by Jennifer’s latest decisions. Lana thought they were fine; that their forbidden relationship was enough for the blonde, and that it would continue this way for some time. She thought Jennifer was as excited as her for season 7 and about Swan Queen being endgame.

She couldn't have been more wrong.

Jennifer ended their relationship; she said that Lana was being selfish and screamed at her telling her to choose between her or Fred. At the time, Lana said she couldn't do that. It was not a simple decision for her to make. That was it took, though. Jennifer decided to end their relationship right away because she couldn't be with Lana if she was still married. Somehow, even after that, Lana still felt hopeful that her co-star would change her mind and come back to her soon. But no, that didn't happen. Instead, Jennifer made the most crucial decision she could ever make and ended everything, all at once. Swan Queen wasn't going to be endgame and Jennifer decided that for _both_ of them, even after everything they’ve been through these past months.

Now, as in the present, Lana kept thinking about all of that. At the time she couldn't see how selfish and unfair she had been to her ex-lover. Having an affair hadn't been enough for Jennifer, and the blonde was right for not wanting something like that. Lana didn't like to be a cheater, either. But the ‘choice’ had been thrown at her without warning, and she wasn't ready to choose between both of them yet. Now, however, she couldn't help but regret not choosing _Jennifer_ instead. She couldn't help but regret not ending her marriage with Fred the time Jennifer told her she loved her too.

Despite her regrets, she knew she couldn't go back in time and fix her bad choices. Now, there was only the present and she had to deal with it the way it was. Deal with professionalism as many people of the cast, her colleagues, started to leave to continue with their lives out of the show they’ve been working on for the past seven years. The hardest right now, though, was dealing with Jennifer’s decision; her latest and cruelest decision. To be honest, Lana didn't know if she would ever be able to forgive Jennifer Morrison for being so unprofessional, so _uncaring_ toward Swan Queen and their beautiful fandom. She didn't know if she would ever forgive Jennifer for filling her heart with love and then breaking it in tiny little pieces. She didn't know if Jennifer would forgive her either for being so selfish and unfair.

* * *

 

&

It was time to do the right thing. She couldn't continue living a lie; trapped in a marriage that didn't suffice any of her needs, those being sexual and emotional. When she got married a few years ago, she thought that this was _it,_ that no one else would make her feel like Fred did. She had been wrong, after all. There was someone that could make her feel like the moon was laying in her hands; someone that made her feel like her heart would explode of so much love and tiny butterflies from this explosion would fly happily around her. Before, Lana didn't know that feeling this way was a possibility. She didn't know that someone working with her for years was the one who would make her feel like that.

Lana _loves_ her husband. She has always loved him, but mostly because he had always been a good friend, a good husband, a very kind person at all times. But that wasn't enough for her. That became clear when she started cheating on him with her co-star and realized how much she could feel with someone else. 

Today, Lana decided she couldn't keep living a lie.

Fred had just gotten home from a long trip to Europe. He had greeted her with a kiss on the cheek and headed straight to the shower. When he was finally ready for bed and laid down beside her with a tired smile, she knew that it was now or never.

She had to end this. It wasn't healthy for either of them.

“Hey,” she said casually, feeling her hands sweat with nervousness.

He had this soft look on his face and she felt even worse; looking at his small smile made her feel extremely guilty. Despite how hard and distant their marriage had turned the past year, he clearly didn’t deserve what she had been doing to him.

“Hi, Lana. How was your day?”

She smiled back at him, sighing loudly as she straightened her position on the bed. 

“It was good. I went to the park with Lola. How was your trip?”

“It was great. I solved everything I needed to solve related to work and even got to visit some new places.”

Her smile tightened and realized she had to relax more to continue this conversation. 

_It was now or never._

“I have something important to talk to you.”

He swallowed and straightened his back, turning to face Lana.

“Spit it out.”

Lana took a deep breath before starting, “I think you have noticed the change in our marriage… have you?” he nodded. “Well, we have been very distant from each other. Our jobs have gotten in the way too, but that’s not all of it. It has been quite some time that I realized something is just not… _right_ between us. It’s just… it seems like it’s not… _enough_.”

He sighed, but his eyes never left hers. He seemed to understand exactly what she was telling him about.

“I have rehearsed this conversation in my mind many times,” Lana continued, “but I simply can’t… I can’t find words to tell you how I feel.”

“I know exactly what you’re talking about, Lana. I know that our marriage has changed over the years. I know how you feel because I’ve been feeling the same way.”

“You have?” she asked with surprise.

“Well, yes. We’re distant, and I feel that. I have tried to be more present; to take fewer trips away from Canada, but I’m the only one trying that.”

She was taken aback by his sudden confession, which caused her hands to sweat even more and her heart to beat uncontrollably inside her chest. She simply had no idea where he was going with his confession.

“You’re never here either, Lana. And you don’t tell me things like you used to. I have been noticing your behaviour for a while now, and I stopped acting like a fool and decided to look at things the way they are.”

Lana swallowed, now sure of where this conversation was going.

“I know that you’ve been lying and hiding from me. I know that you cheated on me with Jennifer Morrison. I’ve known it for a while, and I have waited for your confession, or simply for you to look guilty by doing it. But no, you didn’t do any of that. Today was the only time you actually looked guilty about your actions.”

Lana was truly troubled by what he had just said, so she tried to mutter something, _anything_ — but didn't find anything to say in her defense. “I-”

“You don’t need to explain yourself,” he interjected. “I was mad with you, I truly was. And most of all, I was really disappointed in you for cheating on me. I never thought you would, to be honest-”

“Fred, I’m-”

“No, let me finish.” He lifted his right hand at her and then continued, “My anger was gone when I realized that you didn't feel the way I feel for you anymore. You fell in love with Jennifer and I could see that in your eyes. I could see it from your behaviour acting toward her. I’m not blind and I _know_ you, Lana. We have been friends for a long time, and I know the depth of your feelings.”

“Fred-”

“The way you look at her… you have this sparkle in your eyes when you’re with her that you don’t have it with me. You never had it with me.” He took a deep breath and Lana felt helpless at every single of his words being thrown at her. She didn't know what to say. The only thing she was sure of was that the way the feels for Jennifer was never the way she felt for him.

“I’m sorry. I know I destroyed our marriage with this-”

“No, you didn’t, Lana.” He looked down, his expression so sad that it hurt. “ _We_ did. It wasn't working anymore and we both know that. I just… maybe it was never supposed to be us, you know?”

Lana wiped the tears from her face and sniffed. This was hard. Much harder than she thought it would be. She hadn't planned on telling him about cheating and ended up surprised when she discovered he already knew about everything.

“I guess it wasn't meant to be.”

They spent a few minutes in silence, looking down at their own fidgeting hands.

“I’m sorry if I couldn't be the man you needed me to be,” he said low, still looking down at his hands.

“Don’t ever apologize for that, Fred. You were great. _We_ were great for as long as it lasted.”

He lifted his head, flashing her a small smile.

“I just want you to be happy.”

“I want you to be happy, too,” she said, leaning closer to hug him. He let her, which was a good sign, and they spent long minutes hugging, comforting each other silently.

* * *

 

&

The divorce papers were finally settled. Lana promised Fred she would try to keep contact with him. He said that their divorce didn't have to be like those awkward ones that the ex-wife and ex-husband hated each other. She was glad about that, and when they departed ways, she felt as if a weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Lana still felt bad for everything she did, but there were no regrets. _How could she ever regret falling in love?_

The next two months were used to spend time with her family, and participating in OUAT’s comic cons. She went to Sicily in Italy with her mother and got to meet her Sicilian family. She had a great time with everyone. When she got back, it was the start date for comic cons and interviews. She truly enjoyed every minute of everything, especially the comic cons which she went along with Bex and some other cast members.

Once Upon A Time had been renewed for season 7 and she couldn't be happier. She celebrated it alone at her new house in Vancouver; she opened an expensive bottle of champagne and some days after, she went to New York to celebrate season seven’s pickup with the new cast and crew.

There were more comic cons to attend, which she did gratefully, especially the one being in Paris. Lana simply loved Paris, and she never got tired of spending time with her fans and answering all of their funny, sometimes _annoying_ , questions. The comic cons were great for the actors and fans. The hardest part for Lana had always been the part in which the fans would give her pictures or posters to sign. There were always fan arts of Emma and Regina. And after everything that had happened these past months, those arts somehow triggered _something_ inside her.

The first fan art she received in Paris of Emma and Regina caused her breath to catch in her throat as she stared at the beautiful fan art and how talented her fans were. That time, she couldn't control herself and let her fingertip lovingly trace Jen’s features on the paper. When she realized what she had been doing, she immediately stopped. There was a fangirl in front of her, watching her expectantly and she couldn't be doing that _;_ couldn't be this _weak_ in front of her fans _._

Her heart clenched inside her chest as she signed the fan art and flashed the fan girl a sad, wistful smile. 

Lana would never, ever do that again.

* * *

 

&

Season 7 was about to start. Lana had been trying to avoid her own traitorous mind and failed miserably. Everything that had happened during season 6, everything with a certain _blonde_ , had been hard for Lana to avoid thinking about, especially now that she was back on set, getting to meet the new cast. It was harder than she thought it would be. 

They filmed the first episode of season 7, and everything was fine. She had kept her mind on control and tried to enjoy the presence of the new cast. They were amazing, to be honest. But the news that Jennifer Morrison had been invited for a small participation on the second episode had her on the absolute edge. 

The episode was Hook centered, so Colin would be filming along with Jennifer, Jared, and Andrew. There was a small part that Regina would have to step in just to nod at Emma; silently give her some kind of approval. However, during that small part, Regina had to participate, their eyes locked briefly and they flashed tight smiles at each other, just like it was scripted. When the scene ended, Lana took her time and observed her ex-lover and realized that she had cut her hair. Those locks weren't natural and she remembered being familiar with them when they were together. Now, they were gone and as a replacement, the hair crew attached some poor blonde locks to Jennifer’s hair. At that moment, Lana desired to see how her hair looked so short. 

When she finally had some quiet moment for herself inside her trailer, she didn't waste time and opened Jennifer’s Instagram page and viewed her newly uploaded photos. Her hair looked so beautiful, just like the deep sparkle of happiness that was emanating from her eyes. Jennifer looked like she was having the time of her life; working on a new play (which Lana discovered after stalking every new photo) with Matthew Perry. By those photos, the blonde seemed to be very happy _away_ from Once Upon A Time and that infuriated Lana to no end. It infuriated her that Jennifer had put it all to waste and threw the future of their characters away.

Lana was still bitter about Jennifer’s decision. She would always be bitter and there were no traces of forgiving her ex-lover if they ever talked again. Feeling angered and disappointed, she decided to delete the photo she took of Jennifer for the hashtag _Oncers._ Her ex-lover/co-star didn't deserve that photo. Along with that, she also decided to delete some photos of her and Fred. Even though no one but them and their family knew about their divorce, she decided to delete most of those photos because it didn't feel right to be there. Sooner or later her fans would notice the missing photos, but right now, she wasn't caring about the consequences. In the future, when she had enough courage, she would eventually tell the world about her divorce with Alfredo DiBlasio.

* * *

 

&

Time went by again, and soon it was her forty-one birthday. She invited her mother, sister, and her closest female friends to a restaurant to celebrate it. When she came back to set after her five days-off, she was welcomed with many gifts and flowers from her fans. They were so caring and never disappointed.

More comic cons were scheduled, such as _Creation Entertainment_ and _SDCC_. She spent a great time with the new cast and enjoyed all the questions about the new plot of the seventh season.

Everything on set was running smoothly, and the episodes were as perfect as they should be. Even better when Adam and Eddy hired Rebecca again and they were together on set again. Everything was better with her _sis_ by her side.

Soon it was time for the holidays. The rest of the year had passed like a flash and suddenly it was time for New Year’s. Lana just couldn't believe that more than five months had passed since the last time she had seen Jennifer Morrison. Her heartbreak and loneliness were always present, but she tried as hard as she could not acknowledge them. She had been going out with her friends and cast members a lot lately, mostly to forget about the events of the beginning of this year.

When Trish, her best friend, invited her to spend New Year’s at the Maldives, she realized she couldn't say no. It was about time for a vacation. 

When she returned to the set, after long days of relaxing on that beautiful island with her bestie, she was welcomed with a great surprise: Adam and Eddy gave her the opportunity to direct an episode of OUAT. Lana was so excited about it. She worked her ass off for it to be perfect; posted pictures on Instagram of the behind the scenes and loved every minute of it, especially when she got to direct Bex as Zelena. 

And suddenly it was March. The second half of the seventh season was being aired and Lana couldn't be happier. Everything was working well in her life… except for that small detail of an absent _person_ that she didn't want to acknowledge. 

When the famous Zimbio March Madness started, Lana knew that Swan Queen was going to be participating, as for the last time ever. Her fans sent her tweets about all of that every day and also told her how much they were voting to win so Swan Queen be could be honoured. It hurt to know that this was the last time for Swan Queen to participate; she couldn't do anything about it, though. It hadn't been her fault that Swan Queen didn't happen, anyway.

After realizing that Swan Queen had made it to the finals, she decided to encourage her fans to keep voting to win. She used nice words and even wrote the hashtag Swan Queen on the photo she uploaded on Instagram. The fans went completely wild after that and also became _very_ motivated. She wasn't surprised in the end when Swan Queen won the Zimbio March Madness.

As always, good news arrived as well as bad ones: season 7 was the last season of Once Upon A Time. Lana would have to say goodbye to this amazing show that had changed her life very, very soon.

* * *

 

&

Still on March, as the show was coming to an end, Lana received the final scripts and the news dropped on her head: Jennifer was coming back for one last episode in the finale. An episode that she would have to interact with Lana! The brunette couldn't help but feel immensely nervous about the news. She wasn't expecting that _at all_. She wasn't expecting to see Jennifer _ever again,_ especially back on set.

When the day arrived, Lana could barely focus on learning the lines for the episode. It was the last one, ever. It was very hard to read it and not cry. It was the end of a long journey and, somehow, it didn't feel real that it was ending. 

Jennifer’s trailer was already set up, just beside Ginny’s — who had come back for the last episode too, along with Josh — and only looking at that and the name _JMo_ written on the door made her body receive all kinds of shivers and her traitorous mind to remind her of many of the moments they spent inside trailers.

The hours passed — too slowly for her liking — and then it was time to start dressing up for Regina. When she was finally dressed with Regina’s gown, makeup and hair done, she headed toward the green room where many people were already gathered, talking animatedly with each other. The last scene would be Regina’s coronation as the Good Queen at the castle in the Enchanted Forest. Regina had a beautiful speech right after being coronated and Lana wondered if she would be able to hold back her own tears. Also, she wondered if she would be strong enough to keep her face neutralized when she had to hug Jennifer. Yes, there was another Swan Queen hug, after all. A hug that, before all of what happened, would make her feel the happiest woman on the planet; now, however, it triggered her with many repressed thoughts and emotions.

“Hey, sis. Are you okay?” Bex appeared by her side, smiling tentatively. 

“Yes, I’m…I’m fine.” She smiled back, trying to look as content as she could. It was a lie, obviously. She was _not_ fine. Especially when Jennifer Morrison walked through the door. For some long minutes, Lana gazed into those green eyes. And Jennifer gazed into brown ones. Lana’s whole body felt suddenly warm by the new presence in the room. It had been so long since they’ve seen each other. And now, even from afar, it felt like they hadn't been apart at all. 

Their connection broke when a makeup artist approached the blonde and started applying more makeup on her face and then, Dania Ramirez moved around the blonde with her camera on. Lana turned around, not wanting to be caught staring, as Rebecca draped an arm over her shoulder, pulling her close.

“How are you _really_ feeling, Lana?”

“Terrified,” she answered with a wistful sigh.

* * *

 

&

The brief rehearsals and the real scene went on perfectly. After her chat with Bex, she decided to act the most professional she could. That worked out fine until she had to hug Jennifer a couple of times during rehearsals. Her sweet, flowery smell invaded Lana’s nostrils every time they hugged during rehearsals and the real scene. It was suffocating to have her so close and have to act like nothing at all had happened between them the past year. 

During Regina’s speech, Lana had been on the verge of crying and tried her best not to look at Jennifer. After everything was over, she couldn't help but think about the lines of that speech. It made her realize that it could very well fit in the gap of her current situation in life; more precisely talking about her _love_ life. A second chance was exactly what she was wanting right now. A second chance at love with the woman she never fell out of love.

The cast and crew were now hugging, laughing and praising each other for the final scene of the show and for all the seven years working together. Lana had to hold back her tears once again as she viewed the most important chapter of her life coming to an end. Brown eyes met green ones across the room, and she let out a wistful sigh and then lowered her head, walking to the nearest bathroom as quick as possible. She was crying and she didn't want Jennifer to know that Lana’s tears were also because of _her_. She didn't want Jennifer to know that she still loved her so, so much. She didn't want Jennifer to know that her heart and body _yearned_ for her love and touch. 

Lana didn't want to admit to herself how much she wanted Jennifer Morrison back in her life.

Her heart was racing inside her chest as she gazed at herself through the mirror. _Maybe you have a second chance,_ her own voice murmured with hope in her thoughts. _Maybe you can both forgive each other and move on together._ She grinned at her reflection in the mirror, viewing her eyes shine with hope. 

_Don’t waste your time. Go after her,_ the voice in her head continued. Lana turned around, ready to stop hiding away in that bathroom and run to find the woman she loves. However, a thought stopped her in her tracks: what if Jennifer had already moved on, and found someone else? What if she never loved Lana and all of what happened was just the heat of the moment?

No, that couldn't be it.

Lana couldn't be thinking about this. She had to _try_. She had to look for a second chance.

She ran toward the green room and searched the place quickly with her eyes. She found Ginny chatting with Josh and Bex in a corner and walked over to them.

“Where is she?” she asked, breathless, while she gazed deeply into their eyes. Luckily, they all knew right away who she was talking about and Lana didn't have to say the name out loud.

“She left,” Ginny answered, looking so sad at Lana that made her heart full of hope crack in her chest.

“Already?” she asked again, looking at each of them expectantly; waiting for them to say it was a lie; to say that Jennifer had just gone to her trailer and was coming back soon. 

“Yes. She said she had something important scheduled,” Ginny said.

Lana swallowed the lump in her throat and felt her chest tightening in pain. This was it. Jennifer was gone as well as her second chance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will be posted in two weeks from now - or it could take longer. The reason why is because I have an upcoming exam this Sunday and have to study a lot for it; and next week I'll have to travel and solve some stuff related to my Mom's work.
> 
> And a very sweet reminder that the next chapter is the last one :D 
> 
> Excited? Show me your excitement below on comments! ;)


	20. A Second Chance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, everyone! Long time no see, eh? I'm really sorry it took way longer for me to write the finale - 35 days, to be precise - and I hope you're all still out there waiting for this.  
> I had writer's block for most of these days, that because I didn't know what would be the exact right ending for this story. I really hope I've written the right thing!
> 
> Enjoy the last one! <3

**CHAPTER TWENTY**

**A Second Chance**

* * *

 

**_Lana’s Point of View_ **

The next days felt like she was living in hollowness. Everything was dazed in a way she had never experienced before. All she could think about was Jennifer and how beautiful she looked wearing that pink gown. Lana was feeling lonely and hopeless now. She didn't know what to do, or how to make herself feel better about the latest happenings in her life. She had lost her second chance. She wouldn't see Jennifer again any time soon. That remained her permanent thought until days after when she received the invite for the Once Upon A Time’s closing party. A huge grin formed on her face when she opened the invite. Her heart filled with hope instantly as the idea of Jennifer going popped in her mind. What if they met there and… and talked for a bit? What if _this_ was her second chance? It was just a possibility, but still, it was _something_.

When the day of the party arrived, Lana couldn't contain her excitement. 

To wear, she chose a silver, brilliant overall that showed a great amount of her cleavage, along with black, pointed stilettos and decided to put on make up by herself that night. She felt completely inspired by the possibility that she could see Jennifer. 

When she was done getting ready, Lana couldn't help but feel so confident with herself. Something inside her told her that tonight would be worth it. She was probably going to see Jennifer again, right?

* * *

 

&

It turned out everyone was already there when she arrived, except for Jennifer. Lana swallowed the lump in her throat and tried to dismiss the possibility of her ex-lover not coming to the party. Instead, Lana decided to enjoy her last party with the cast: she drank champagne, danced, talked and took many photos with them. During all that, she constantly glanced at the door to see if a certain blonde would enter, but no. That didn't happen.

The party ended early, only at midnight, and when Lana went home, she was feeling extremely disappointed, sad and hopeless. She had hoped so much, waited for the blonde to appear and make every bad thought go away. Now, however, her chances of seeing Jennifer again had decreased quickly, and there was nothing she could do about it. It was over. This was _it_. There were no second chances in real life. She should have known better.

Lana took off her silver overall as well as her high heels and jumped in on the bed only in her undies, Lola curling up by her side right after. The will to cry was increasing at each second, but she couldn't let that happen. It was too late for that. Wasn't it?

Yes, it was. Unless…

Unless she took the first step. Unless she stopped being such a coward and just _tried_ something. This situation could end up being even more painful, especially if she was rejected by the blonde. However, it wouldn't take so much to try. She just needed to talk to Jennifer, to tell her everything that’s inside and couldn't be said before. Right now, Lana had nothing to lose or fear. Except for rejection, which she would overcome it if it came to that. Right? She just wanted a chance to talk, that’s all. 

Lana took a deep, steadying breath as she grabbed her phone by the nightstand and stared at the iMessage app. Her heart was pounding hard inside her chest such was her cowardliness of taking the first step. What if she didn't get a reply? What if everything go wrong with just one text, just one simple attempt at _trying_?

No. She couldn't be thinking like this. She had to at least try, despite all the fears that started to constantly torment her.

With fingers trembling and body becoming a sweaty, anxious mess, she opened her old conversation with Jennifer and stared at it for long seconds before typing the simplest world and hitting send right after:

**_Hey._ **

Lana kept staring at the recently sent message with some kind of dread and hope at the same time. Then, she decided to put her phone away and change to her pyjamas. She also wiped her face clean of makeup and brushed her teeth, all the while she waited for the familiar ringtone of her phone telling her she got a new message.

That ringtone didn't sound that night. Lana rolled around in her bed, not able to sleep as she waited for a response. For _anything,_ really, even if it was just a rejection _._ She kept the conversation window opened, waiting for the text to appear ‘read _’_ under. But there wasn't any response for the whole night.

On the morning after, Lana wasn’t surprised to see the dark holes under her eyes in the mirror. She had stupidly stayed most of the night awake, waiting for a response that never came. Maybe Jennifer had been out for the whole night, enjoying her evening with someone special. The idea of Jennifer dating anyone made her skin _crawl_. Lana had no right to feel this way, though. It was most likely that she had lost her second chance with her ex-lover.

Before grabbing her damned phone once again to take a look at the texts, she released a deep breath and tried to put in her mind that this shouldn't matter this much… right? If Jennifer didn't answer her, it shouldn't feel _bad._ It was the other woman’s choice. Lana couldn't do anything about it. She surely wouldn't _beg_ for it, no.

When she unlocked her phone to view the conversation, she was surprised to see the ‘read’ alert along with the time it had been seen, 4:45 am. Lana had been asleep by then when Jennifer viewed her text. And that probably confirmed that the blonde had been out for the night, and only saw the text that time and… the predictable happened: she didn’t _want_ to answer her.

Lana closed her tired eyes, trying to prevent unwanted tears from escaping. _This was it._ Her attempt at making things better wouldn’t work. Her second chance had no _chances_ , and it was over. Lana had screwed it up so badly that she wouldn’t be forgiven.

This was it.

.

.

That day, the only thing she felt like doing was laying in her bed and crying. Lana felt so pathetic and weak. As she thought about all of the hurtful things she said to Jennifer before, tears rolled down on her face, causing her chest to tighten painfully every time. She had been so stupid,and so… _selfish_. Selfish had been her main trait back then. All of what Jennifer screamed at her face had been nothing but the truth.

Her attempt at contacting Jennifer now had two main reasons: a) she wanted to apologize and ask for forgiveness, and b) she wanted a second chance to be with the blonde. She wasn’t sure of any of those; now, she wasn’t even sure if Jennifer would _ever_ reply to her text in the first place.

The thought was unsettling, and it made her feel so sad and insecure. She wasn’t sure of anything in her life right now. Many different insecurities filled her mind and bothered her the whole day. Once Upon A Time had ended, so she was unemployed; her second chance at love slipped from her fingers easily, and that is that.

Lola kept snuggling with her on the bed all day long, probably feeling that Lana was down and sad. She petted her puppy’s head and body, relishing on her company as much as she could, trying not to feel so lonely.

She wasn’t surprised to receive Rebecca’s text asking how she was holding up. Her redhead friend had noticed how she was yesterday at the party when she realized that Jennifer wasn’t coming. Trish also texted her, asking if she had seen Jen at the party. Her best friend knew everything about Lana’s relationship with Jennifer. She had told Trish at the Maldives, and her friend — impressively — hadn’t been that surprised. Maybe most people noticed the chemistry they had on TV and in real life. That surely could be it. Lana also imagined that there were some people that wanted them to be together in real life. She didn’t know much about that, didn’t know if there was a fandom out there dedicated to them, but she hopefully _did not_ want it to exist. Her future with Jennifer was unsettling. There might not exist a future for them, actually.

And that was proved when two days passed and there was no response whatsoever from her ex-lover.

Trish surprised her with an idea, saying they should go on another trip together, this time to Kenya, Africa. Lana simply couldn't say no, especially when Trish said they should also invite Lana’s sister, Deena. Lana needed some time away from this reality and traveling was surely the best option.

* * *

 

&

When she came back from Kenya, the first thing she did was to check on her messages. Trish had prohibited her from doing that in Kenya as they only used professional cameras to take pictures of the beautiful animals in the safaris. Lana had acted a bit stubborn with the order but realized soon later that it was for the best. She needed this vacation away from reality, and it had been amazing while it lasted. Now that she was back, life would go on.

Before she unlocked her phone, she viewed a notification under the name _Jen_ and her heart started beating uncontrollably inside her chest. She hastily unlocked her phone and opened the text. It said:

**_Hello._ **

So simple, yet _so much_. Lana had been waiting for a response for more than a _week_ and the blonde finally decided to answer her. She hadn’t received the text when she was in Kenya. It was today, the day she got back home that Jennifer decided to answer her.

Lana was trembling when she started typing on the keyboard:

**_I want to talk to you._ **

The reply came quickly after that:

**_Then talk._ **

Lana sighed at the coldness of that simple text, and typed back with no further ado:

**_I was thinking that maybe we should meet for this kind of conversation._ **

Jennifer’s next words caused her chest to tighten painfully inside her chest:

**_What is the purpose of having a conversation? After so long?_ **

Lana breathed in a steadying breath and typed back:

**_I’ve been wanting to talk to you for a little while. Thought I was going to have the chance._ **

There was no quick text right after. Lana started panicking a bit when long five minutes passed with no answer. Tears were starting to form in her eyes at the idea of her attempt at a second chance ending now, quick like a band-aid being ripped off. Her heart bumped against her ribcage when a new text appeared:

**_Where do you want to meet?_ **

A smile appeared on her face at the word, and her heart, mind, and body calmed instantly. This was good news. Amazing news, honestly. Lana wanted this conversation to happen as soon as possible. She had waited a week for a response, so getting this over with sooner was the best option. Besides, she couldn't wait to see Jennifer again.

She typed a quick response back:

**_I’d like you to come to my house in LA. That is if you’re in the city. Are you available tomorrow night?_ **

The blonde answered faster this time:

**_Yes._ **

**_Is 8 pm a good time for you?_ **

Two long minutes passed until Jennifer texted back, her words sharp like a blade:

**_Fine. Send me the address. I won’t stay for long._ **

Besides all, Lana couldn't help but feel overjoyed with the news. Jennifer had accepted her attempt at a conversation and this was the best she could hope for. She thought she wouldn’t have the chance after Jennifer ignored her text, but now it felt like this was her second chance. Now everything felt like it was going toward the right way.

* * *

 

&

The next day, Lana could barely keep herself together as she anxiously imagined how her encounter with Jennifer would be. She kept pacing around the house, trying to find something to do as Lola followed her, finding all of it amusing. Trish texted her and asked how she was feeling, and Lana told her the truth: she was not ready to have this encounter, but was sure that this was the right thing to do. She and Jennifer had to talk, regardless of how things between them would be after this encounter.

The day went by quickly and soon it was almost time for her ex-lover to arrive. Lana didn’t know what else to do before the blonde arrived. She had already tidied the house a couple of times, took a long, relaxing time in the bath and then couldn’t figure it out what to wear. Her hair also became a problem when she realized she couldn’t decide what to do with it. In the end, she settled on not using the dryer and let it curl naturally. She took a bit longer to decide what to wear but soon chose some blue jeans and a plaid shirt. Looking simple was her main goal because she didn't Jennifer to think she was so desperate that she had to dress up for their encounter. However, she still settled on putting light make up on her face. 

When she was done with all that, an idea came to her mind and she decided to make some margaritas. It wasn’t long until she realized that involving alcohol in this conversation wouldn’t be a very good idea.

Her phone beeped and she quickly grabbed it thinking it was Jennifer. Her heart had pained instantly at the thought of the blonde cancelling on her, however, it was nothing from Jennifer and just another text from Trish:

**_I know you’re probably pacing around the house and freaking out by now, but don’t be like that, Lana. Try taking some deep breaths, decide what you wanna tell her and be hopeful. Okay?_ **

She smiled at the nice text her best friend had sent her and decided to do just that. Trish was right. She replied to her with an ‘okay’ and moved to the couch to take some deep breaths.

It was 6 pm when Lana forced herself to stand in front of the mirror and tried to form a speech. She had many things to say to Jennifer, but it was most probable that she would freeze right when she saw the blonde... _Shit_. She had to maintain her composure. She had to tell Jennifer everything she needed to say.

She stood there, motionless, gazing at herself through the mirror wondering once again why she had been so selfish in the past. This conversation wouldn’t have to happen if Lana had chosen _right._ A single tear slipped from her eye and she quickly wiped it away. It was too late to be crying.

When she glanced at her watch, she viewed it was 7 pm already, an hour prior to their encounter. Lana walked to the kitchen and tried to eat something, but that wasn’t working either. She was too anxious and couldn't even _eat_ anything. Her heart had started beating too fast every time the seconds passed. Butterflies found their way to her stomach as she thought about Jennifer and her beautiful face. She missed her so much.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang the same time her phone beeped with a new message from Jennifer:

**_I’m outside._ **

Lana’s eyes widened as her heart pumped loudly against her chest, the noise echoing to her ears. She swallowed hard, realizing long seconds later that she had become frozen on the spot, facing the front door.

She tried to send her anxiety away and shook her head to clear her thoughts, while she slowly walked toward the front door.

With a last deep breath, Lana unlocked the door and turned the knob.

For long seconds, they both stared into each other’s eyes, neither of them being able to blink. Her eyes roamed hastily over Jennifer’s body, appreciating the details she had been denied to see for so long: her beautiful blonde hair, the length now to her shoulders; her gorgeous, delicious body with arms that looked even more toned now, wearing jeans and a white, silk blouse. Lana felt her body shiver at all the memories of the things they’ve done together: lips on lips, skin on skin... God, she had to send those thoughts away. This was not an encounter for _sex_ or anything related to that.

Jennifer cleared her throat, causing Lana’s eyes to meet green ones once again, finding the blonde wearing a deadpanned expression on her face.

“Are we going to talk here at the door?” the blonde asked coldly, causing Lana to flinch slightly. She shouldn’t be surprised, though. This attitude of hers was expected.

Lana swallowed and then said, “Sorry. Please, come in.”

She moved to the side so Jennifer could enter. The blonde did so hesitantly, and when she passed by Lana, the brunette could smell Jennifer’s sweet fragrance that was her signature. She smelled so intoxicatingly good. 

Lana closed the door right after the blonde walked inside and pressed her back against the wood to take deep breaths as she watched Jennifer subtly observing the space around her.

When Jennifer turned around to face Lana, the brunette quickly unglued herself from the door and asked, “Do you want something to drink?”

The blonde’s expression hardened instantly and she said, “I told you I wouldn’t stay for long. What do you want to talk about?”

Lana sighed and suggested, “Can we sit?” Jennifer nodded reluctantly and then, they both moved to sit on the end of the couch, both of them far away from each other as possible. That caused Lana’s heart to tighten inside her chest. She sighed again, and then continued, “I have been thinking about what happened between us.”

“Why were you thinking about us?” Jennifer asked flatly, and Lana swallowed at the harshness in her voice.

“Because I couldn’t help _not_ thinking about us,” Lana answered with a bit of frustration. Her eyes met green ones when the blonde took too long to answer. They looked inscrutable, and Jen’s expression was so _indifferent_. It hurt so much being treated this way, but Lana knew she deserved it. It had been her own fault that they split up, anyway.

“Well, you shouldn’t have been thinking about us. It makes no sense at all.”

Lana took in a steadying breath and then said quietly, “I-I got divorced a few months ago.”

Jennifer looked at her with wide eyes as a frown formed on her forehead. Their eyes found each other again, and Jennifer held Lana’s gaze steadily, seeming to search for something in them, which made the brunette slightly uncomfortable. She forgot how overwhelming it felt to have those green eyes looking back at her with so much intensity. 

“W-why? Why did you do that?” the blonde asked, her eyes never leaving brown ones.

“I guess you already know the reason.”

“No, I don’t,” the blonde said matter-of-factly. “Why would you do that?”

Lana sighed with wistfully. “I thought it was obvious how I felt for you.”

“No, Lana. That was never obvious to me. Do you realize that you chose to stay with your _husband_ instead of me?”

“You didn’t give me a choice-”

“Of course I did. You chose _him,”_ Jennifer stressed with bitterness in her voice.

“No, I…I wasn’t ready to _choose_ anyone. When you told me what was at stake, I didn’t actually know what I was losing.” Jennifer finally looked away, her lower lip trembling slightly. “It took me a while to realize the mistakes I’ve made.” When Jennifer didn’t answer, she continued, “I was angry too, you know?”

The blonde scoffed. “Of course you were.”

“Well, you were very unprofessional when you made the decision to leave the show, Jennifer,” Lana said bitterly, remembering how unfair the blonde had been to SwanQueen. Lana had the right to be angry too, right?

“As if staying would have made any of us happy,” Jennifer said quietly, still avoiding the brunette’s eyes.

“That is not the point. You were ignorant and selfish when you dropped everything we had been working on the show because of our relationship.”

“You call _that_ a relationship?” the blonde turned to look at her again, and Lana could see so much pain inside those green pools. Her heart tightened painfully inside her chest for the hundredth time that day.

“No, I… that wasn't a _healthy_ relationship.”

“I’m glad you’re aware of that,” Jennifer said dryly, her top lip curling in slight distaste. “And I expected you to blame me for all the decisions I made. Of course I’m supposed to be guilty, huh?” she mocked bitterly, causing Lana to swallow the lump in her throat.

“No, no, you’re not supposed to feel guilty. I-I mean… I didn't approve of your decision to leave the show, but before all that, I’ve made plenty of bad decisions regarding you and… and to us. And I know that you made that decision because of me.”

“Yes, I’ve made that decision because I couldn’t be near you anymore. I didn’t want to,” she said grimly. “The best option was to move on, and we both did that.” Jennifer stood up from the couch, seeming to be ready to leave, which caused Lana to act impulsively and grasp the blonde’s hand.

“Wait, where are you going?” she hated how vulnerable she sounded right now as if she was pleading the blonde to stay… which she technically was.

Jennifer looked at the hand grasping hers and sighed tiredly. “I’m leaving.”

She stood up immediately to face the blonde in the eyes, and then asked, “Why? We just started talking.”

The blonde’s gaze moved downward, toward their hands that were slightly intertwined. “I moved on, Lana,” she said quietly.

Those words felt as if a sharp knife was cutting through her heart. The idea of Jennifer being romantically involved with someone else made her heart break in a thousand pieces. Her voice barely sounded audible when she asked, “You did?” 

“Yeah.”

Their hands were still together, and Lana didn’t feel like letting go. She tightened the grip on Jen’s hand, knowing this brief touch could be the last one between them.

“Are you, uh…” She cleared her throat so it wouldn't sound to cracked. “Are you dating anyone right now?”

Jennifer glared at her and barked, “Why do you care?”

“Because I... I haven’t moved on.”

“What happened between us is in the past now,” the blonde said coldly as she brushed Lana’s fingers away from hers.

The brunette swallowed hard and said, “Well, _that_ part of our lives is certainly over now. However, I admit I never stopped thinking about you; about how we felt when we were together.”

“ _You_ caused us to split up. I wouldn’t stay in a relationship with you while you were still married. I _told_ you that,” Jennifer explained harshly, but Lana didn't flinch. She had to remain strong and get to the point of this conversation.

“I know you did. I think I realized too late the mistakes I’ve made.”

“Yeah, too late. To be honest, I don’t know what you’re trying to gain with this.” She motioned between them both, in an indifferent way.

“I’m not trying to gain anything, Jennifer,” Lana calmly explained. “I simply wanted us to have a proper conversation since our last one. I didn't want to leave things between us that way.”

“It’s been a year, Lana. A _year_.”

“I know, I-I wasn’t courageous enough to talk to you before.”

“What made you courageous now?”

“It was my last hope.”

“Hope? Hope for what?”

The brunette sighed, feeling her chest on the verge of exploding. This was so _hard_.

“Can you sit again, please?” Jennifer rolled her eyes and sat on the couch again. “I need you to listen to me now, okay?” the blonde sighed and then nodded carefully.

Lana took a deep breath before she started confidently, “I made a mistake, a _huge_ mistake, but that was all it was because there's nothing lacking in what I feel for you. What I feel for you is complete. You should know that. Please, know that” she pleaded quietly. “I tried to keep up with my promises back then. I swear I did. I confess I wanted to have both you and my husband at the time because that was the easiest option I had. I didn’t want to get a divorce, either end my relationship with you, and that was incredibly selfish of me. I was so caught up with my own happiness and needs that I didn’t stop for a moment to realize how _you_ were feeling in the middle of that.”

Jen lowered her head as she slumped on her back on the couch. She didn't say anything though, so Lana felt like she could continue:

“When you told me to choose between you and him, I panicked. I simply wasn’t ready for any of that; for any of you to disappear out of my life. My relationship with my ex-husband hadn’t been good for a while. And it worsened when you and I started hanging out constantly.”

The blonde looked at her again, her expression serious but her eyes shining slightly with surprise.

“You decided to end things with me, and my world fell apart. For some reason, while you were still at the set, I thought that there was still hope for us. I thought you would come back to me.” Jennifer rolled her eyes, which Lana expected her to. “I know that was selfish. I know. And when you told me that you wouldn’t stay on the show, from that moment I realized that everything was lost. I wouldn’t have you back and our characters wouldn’t be together either. Your decision made me so angry and unhappy, that I still haven’t completely recovered from that.”

The blonde scoffed beside her. “You’re making yourself the victim now? Really?”

“No, I’m not trying to be the victim. I believe we both made terrible mistakes. I was selfish and self-centred. You were unprofessional-”

“I know I was being unprofessional, but I wouldn’t have chosen differently,” Jennifer interrupted. 

Lana swallowed and closed her eyes for a few seconds, absorbing all she had from the woman in front of her and deciding what she would say next. 

“I know you wouldn’t,” Lana said quietly, and then lifted her face to meet green eyes. “And I also know that this…this _tension_ between us has always existed. I was attracted to you since the first day I met you.” The blonde’s eyebrows arched with the confession. “That never changed throughout the years, I just… tried to hide it at the back of my mind. I fell in love with my ex-husband but my attraction to you never faded; I just controlled it. When they told us Swan Queen was going to be endgame, I... I felt like the happiest woman alive, that because I was happy for our fans and also... I was curious to know how it would feel like to kiss you.” 

She blushed involuntarily, hating to admit that. Lana wouldn't dare to look at Jennifer right now. She was too embarrassed by admitting all of this.

“We…we started spending time together, rehearsing unnecessary scenes that _I_ always suggested and I guess we got… _too_ into it sometimes. During those months, I was reminded each day by my body and mind how much I was attracted to you; how much I wanted to be close to you. I knew I was married, but every time we were together, I forgot about that important fact. I can honestly tell you that those were the best and hardest moments of my life. I fell in love with someone that wasn’t my husband.” Lana lifted her eyes to look at Jennifer. “Do you have any idea of how that feels? I never wanted to be a cheater. I thought my marriage was forever, I… it was for a while… until you and I started hanging out again and my attraction for you came to the surface.”

Jennifer kept gazing deeply into brown eyes, her face expressionless. Long seconds later, the blonde asked quietly, “Why are you telling me this now?”

“Because I needed to tell you all of this. I needed us to have this conversation, I…” Lana looked down at her own fidgeting hands, and then admitted quietly, “I needed to see you again.”

There was a long moment of silence where both of them stared relentlessly at each other. Lana couldn't avert her eyes from the green ones, that looked so inscrutable. Her body was trembling and her heart pounding with fear. Jennifer could very well be thinking of storming out of her house from any moment now. That would break her, but she would eventually recover from it. _Right?_

Jennifer looked away from brown eyes and stared at her lap. “I-I never got over you.” Lana released a shuddering breath as the blonde continued, “I haven’t moved on from us. I tried dating but it didn’t work out. You left my heart shattered and I couldn’t recover from that. I shouldn’t forgive you for that.” She finished quietly, her head pending downward.

“I shattered my own heart with my own choices. I know it might be too late, but I couldn’t go on without trying to tell you this.”

“Well, it’s never too late for an apology.” Jennifer shrugged in ignorance. “Is that all?”

Lana swallowed the lump in her throat as fear of rejection filled her heart. She hadn't even told Jennifer the whole thing, what she _really_ wanted. At least the blonde hadn't gotten over Lana yet, which was good news. However, the way she was acting as if all Lana had said didn't mean a thing, was what hurt must right now. Lana didn't know if asking for a second chance now would make any difference. But she had to try, though. It was now or never. 

“I…I was wondering if…if it’s too late to ask for a second chance. I know I’ve been nothing but selfish in the past, and I already apologized for that, and now-”

“You want a second chance? For us?” Jennifer interjected.

“Yes.” Lana smiled shyly at the other woman. “I…I want us to have a fresh start. If you give me the chance, I’d like us to get to know each other better, to go out on dates… no fictional couples related. I’d like us to discover together if we can have a relationship… maybe even be addressed as…as _girlfriends_ in the future, if everything works out.” Lana shrugged nonchalantly as if what she had said wasn't important at all.

“Girl-girlfriends?” Jennifer stuttered, her eyes blinking repeatedly as she stared at Lana.

“Yes.” The brunette released a breath and flashed her a grin. “Just you and I against the world, making up for lost time.”

“Why do you want this _now?_ ”

“I’ve always wanted this with you. I…I just wasn’t brave enough to make it happen before.” When Jennifer only kept staring at her, she decided to continue, feeling even braver now, “I’m in love with you and I have been for a while. I tried to fight against this feeling when we split up, but... I just couldn't. It has always been here.” She pressed her hand to her own heart. “I just didn't want to acknowledge it.” 

Long seconds passed while they stared at each other in silence. Jennifer was gazing at her with a slightly bewildered expression and her eyes seemed to be glinting dreamily. Lana didn't know what to get from _that_. She was expecting _words,_ even if it was some kind of rejection. She just needed Jennifer to open her mouth and _talk._ The wait, their eyes fixed together was driving her crazy.

After releasing a long, suffering sigh, Lana proceeded, “If you don’t feel the same way, it’s okay-” 

She was drastically interrupted when eager pink lips pressed onto hers, causing a hot gasp to escape from her parted lips as and her breathing grew heavy and strained within her chest. Jennifer broke the kiss as quick as it started, breathing in deeply while her dazed eyes gazed into Lana’s, seeming to search for something that the brunette wasn't aware of. She was just so shocked that Jennifer had just _kissed_ her, even if it was so brief. Her heart was pounding so hard against her ribcage that she thought the blonde could very well _hear_ it. 

A tentative hand reached over and pressed onto Lana’s chest, the spot where it laid her beating heart. Jennifer looked at her own hand, still completely dazed, as a small smile appeared on her lips. Lana couldn't think properly anymore. Couldn’t possibly _move_. She felt puzzled by the sudden gesture and also a bit embarrassed to have someone know the way she was _feeling_ by pressing their hand just above the skin of her beating heart.

The blonde’s hand moved toward the nape of her neck and grasped her hair locks softly. A low, wanton moan escaped Lana’s lips when Jennifer recaptured her lips hungrily. Her tongue slid into the brunette’s mouth without much effort, causing the brunette to feel all kind of feelings at the same time while Jennifer explored every dip and curve like she used to do when they were together. Her body received a delicious shiver, bringing sexy memories back to her in an instant. 

She couldn't believe they were kissing. She couldn't believe Jennifer had interrupted her with a _kiss._ A kiss that meant so much _more_ than words.

Jennifer suddenly broke the kiss and buried her face in the nape of Lana’s neck, her heavy breathing bringing goosebumps to the brunette’s olive skin.

“I’m in love with you, too.” The blonde said quietly in her ear. A jolt of happiness and relief filled her whole body, and she let out a gasp while her arms wrapped around Jennifer tightly. “And I forgive you, Lana. I do.”

A tear rolled on her cheek, but there was only happiness inside her heart. A huge grin formed on her face and she tightened her arms around Jennifer, bringing her closer. “Thank you for that.”

The blonde pulled away only a few inches and grasped Lana’s face with both hands, making the brunette focus nowhere but on her. “Pushing you away was one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make. And I’m sorry if I hurt you too.”

“It’s okay. I forgive you.”

Jen grinned and then pulled Lana into a quick kiss, to then wrap the brunette in her arms, tugging her impossibly closer so they could rest within the embrace against the back of the couch. Lana simply couldn't believe they were in this position like this as if nothing had ever happened between them in the past. She couldn't believe Jennifer had forgiven her; she couldn't believe Jennifer was in love with her too, after everything they’ve been through.

Lana released a sigh of relief and pulled Jennifer tighter against her side. “I…I can’t believe you want this. _Us,”_ she murmured quietly.

“I’ve always wanted this, for us to be this way. And like you said, we’ve both made mistakes, but that’s all in the past now. We can start again. I want this,” the blonde confessed quietly as Lana rested her head on Jen’s chest and snuggled tighter against her side.

“To be honest, I thought you wouldn’t forgive me. I had hope, of course, but that wasn't enough. However, I knew that I had to tell you everything and apologize, because I know I was extremely selfish back then.”

“It makes it easier to forgive when the person that hurt you admits their mistakes. That’s what you did, and that’s really brave of you. Though I'm still in love with you, so it makes it easier to forgive. You’re not the only one who wants a second chance.”

Lana pulled away a bit to look into green eyes. “So… you want what I said earlier?”

“To be your girlfriend?” the blonde teased with a smirk, causing the brunette to blush involuntarily.

“Yeah, that would be our main goal for this relationship, but first I think we should go out on a few dates. We’ve done everything backward in the past, and now we should do everything right.”

“I agree. We should do it slow and romantic.”

“Exactly,” Lana said and leaned in to kiss the blonde, who pulled away with another smirk.

“We haven’t been on our first date yet and you’re already trying to kiss me? That’s against the rules, Parrilla.”

“You broke the rules I a few times more than I did today, Jen.”

“I know.” The blonde let a laugh escape and then slowly pulled Lana in for a long-lasting peck on the lips.

They spent the next half an hour curled up on the couch, entangled with each other’s bodies while caressing each other’s skin with light touches.

“I have to work early tomorrow morning,” Jen murmured as she drew patterns on the skin of Lana’s arm.

“You do?”

“Yes. It’s getting late.”

Lana pulled Jen tighter against her body instinctively. She didn't want her to go, but she knew they couldn't stay together tonight, even if Jen didn't have anything for tomorrow. They were taking this slowly and romantic. 

“I understand. What are you going to do?”

“I can tell you all about that on our date.”

The brunette smiled genuinely. “That’s a good idea. When do you want it to be?”

“This Saturday?”

“Great, it works for me. Where do you wanna go?”

“A nice, and romantic restaurant?”

“Yes, I know a very good place. Can I surprise you?”

“Of course you can.” Jennifer placed a kiss on the top of Lana’s head. “I can’t wait.”

“Me neither.”

Jennifer left eventually, with a lot of reluctance on both parts, and Lana was left alone pressed against the front door with a huge grin on her face. Sometimes she couldn’t believe how lucky she was. This was her second chance, a fresh start at love and happiness and she was so content. That had been the longest conversation she has ever had, and all the time they talked was worth it. Jennifer had forgiven her and their feelings for each other were still the same. Lana was truly blessed.

She couldn’t wait for Saturday night.

* * *

 

&

**First Date**

They had been texting non-stop the past few days, talking about their plans for their date on Saturday or just any random topic that they desired to talk about. Lana had enjoyed every second of that, and the anxiousness for their first date grew unbearable each day.

She had already told Trish and Bex how her conversation with Jen was, and they were also very happy for them both. Lana wouldn't obviously tell anyone else because she and Jennifer still had to talk a lot more about how their relationship would work. She was anxious for that conversation too and wondered what the blonde had to say about it all. To be honest, she just wanted to be close to her and enjoy their time together. Lana had spent too long without her, and now she wanted to enjoy every single second she had with the woman.

Lana had the perfect restaurant in mind for them to dine in peace and talk to each other privately. However, she didn't tell any of the details to Jennifer and just sent her the address. Hopefully, the blonde didn't already know the place. Lana was really excited for it all to be a surprise.

On Saturday morning, she went on the Hollywood sign hike with Trish and they talked more about Lana’s new relationship and what it could become. They talked about Jennifer’s personality, a bit about their latest decisions and about getting married again. Lana would definitely get married one day again, but right now there were no rushing things up because she wanted to focus on her career and on her new relationship. They would take their relationship slowly and see what could happen if everything worked out fine. They still had lots to talk about before they dove into the seriousness of a real relationship.

They had agreed to meet at the restaurant at 8 pm, so by 6 pm Lana had already showered and kept staring at the clothes hanging in her closet and wondering what she should wear. Thank God it was summer, so she wouldn't need to wear a coat. She chose a purple, loose dress with cuffed sleeves and pockets with the length to her thighs. She grabbed a long necklace and put it around her neck, and it fitted perfectly with the dress. She chose black, medium, leather boots; put on makeup to her face along with eyeshadow and a wine-coloured lipstick that matched with her whole outfit.

Lana took a deep breath in front of the mirror and couldn't help smiling at herself. She was so happy that she stopped being a coward and took the first step. Now she was going on a date with Jennifer Morrison, her ex-co-star/lover that she had been attracted to for so, so long. There were no shackles pulling her down and away from this woman now. This was it. They had a chance at love, _together_ , and this was all she could ever have asked for.

* * *

 

&

Lana watched as Jennifer’s black sedan parked on the spot just beside her own car just a few minutes after she had arrived. The brunette was waiting by her own car, and when the blonde came out of the vehicle, her breath caught in her throat. Jennifer was looking gorgeous as always, wearing a dress in a white hue with bandage style, scoop back and midi length. Her hair was curled at the bottom and she had light make up on her face along with red lipstick. Lana instantly felt like kissing those lips she had been denied to kiss for so long.

“Hey,” the blonde greeted with a sheepish smile as she approached Lana. “You look a bit dazed.”

“You are just…so stunning,” Lana confessed, winking at the blonde who chuckled amusedly.

“Same goes to you, madam.” Jennifer smiled back at her and tentatively grasped her hand. “Shall we go?”

“Yes.” They started walking toward the entrance of the restaurant, hand in hand, not caring if there was anyone there to catch them. The thought caused Lana’s heart to beat faster. “Have you ever been here?”

“Uh, no, but I’ve heard of it. It seems to be a really good restaurant.”

“Yes, I guess it is. I’ve never been here either.”

“Did you book a table in a private space?”

“Definitely. I want to be able to focus on you, only.” 

The blonde flashed a bright grin at her, as they continued walking toward the entrance, hands now only brushing on the way as they stopped to present themselves to the receptionist. Soon they were back at walking again, this time toward their booked table accompanied by the waiter who was going to be serving them for the night.

“Wow, that looks amazing and so romantic,” Jen commented when they reached their table, which was a private spot that was placed on the far end of the restaurant; the place was encased in night lights mixed with flowers and green plants around it and on the ceiling, along with a single table and two chairs placed on the spot.

“I know.” Lana winked at the blonde who just chuckled while they both sat on their respective chairs.

“Can I offer you, ladies, a drink or would you like to wait a few minutes before ordering?”

“What do you want to drink?” Lana asked the blonde.

“I’d like some red wine. You?”

“Red, too.” Lana turned to look at the polite waiter. “Bring the best red wine you have, please.” The maître nodded and then left.

“I can’t believe we’re here,” Lana confessed, releasing a nervous breath as she fidgeted with her fingers.

“I can’t believe it either. This feels...surreal.”

“Yes, it...it’s surreal in a good way. I never thought I’d be seeing you again. A part of me didn’t want to see you and the other... the other craved for you every second of the day.”

“Me too. It was hard for both of us. Though what matters is that you’re here now. You came back to me. I’m glad you took the first step.”

“I’m glad, too. That wasn’t the only time, though.”

“It wasn’t?” Jennifer asked with surprise.

“When you went to Vancouver to film the last episode, I...I realized at that moment that I wanted you back. You were there, looking so beautiful and I...my heart filled with regret. Seeing you that day after so many months did a number on me,” Lana explained, a pink blush colouring her cheeks. The waiter got back with their wine and filled their glasses swiftly. After the man left, Lana took a generous sip of her wine glass, the same time as Jen took her own sip.

“I left quickly after we finished filming,” the blonde said after setting her glass on the table. “Did you go after me?”

“Not really... I-I went to the bathroom when we finished, had my moment of realization, came back and you weren’t there anymore. I thought that was it. I thought my second chance with you was gone.”

Jen cleared her throat and then said, “When I was invited to film the last episode and they told me that I’d have to film a scene with you, I confess I hesitated a bit. It had been so long and I didn’t feel ready to face you again. I didn’t want to, at first. But I accepted for the sake of the show and... when I saw you there, I...I was breathless for a moment. That brief second I allowed myself to look at you, the feelings I thought I had under control resurfaced again and told me that I’d probably never get over you. That day was hard. Hard for both of us.”

Lana flashed the blonde a shy smile. “We were both trying to overcome our feelings for each other, trying to forget everything that happened... and that was all my fault.” Lana grimaced as she lowered her head, guilt consuming her.

“Hey, let’s not dwell on that again.” Jen reached out and placed her hand on top of Lana’s on the table. “We’ve been through too much already and I believe this is our second chance. We can make this work if we’re both willing to try.” The blonde smiled at her, which she returned with a huge grin, intertwining their fingers on the table. 

“Yes, this is our second chance and I couldn't be happier to have had the opportunity to be with you again.”

“I’m happy too,” Jen said as she placed a soft kiss on the skin of Lana’s hand.

* * *

 

&

After they ordered what they would have for dinner, they got entertained in a conversation that stretched on about many random topics, and she realized how easy it still was to talk to the blonde. She had missed this so much. They didn't talk much in the past, but the times they did, they had so much fun and this time was no different. It felt like nothing had happened between them in the past. They were going to overcome all of their mistakes together, and that made Lana smile and smile along the whole time she spent on her date with Jennifer.

They settled on not ordering another bottle of wine because they still had to drive back home. While eating their food, they still kept talking a bit, laughing with and at each other every few minutes. It was hard to believe that they had reached this point now, after so long. Lana couldn't help but get lost into green, emerald eyes sometimes, wondering how lucky she was to have this woman back in her life. She had been stupid to give up on this woman, on her _love,_ for a marriage she wasn't even happy to be in. But as Jennifer had said, it was not the time to dwell on that again. They’ve already had a long conversation about that and now everything seemed to be okay between them.

Time passed too quickly for her liking, and soon it was time to leave the restaurant. They decided to share the bill and then started to walk away from the restaurant, hands brushing on the way.

“This is one of the best dates I’ve ever had,” Lana commented conversationally after they crossed the exit.

“I know I’m unforgettable,” Jen teased, causing Lana to laugh whole-heartedly.

“Yes, you are.” They came to a stop right beside their cars parked on the parking spot.

“So…” Jennifer started, raising her perfectly sculpted eyebrows as she approached Lana, slightly pressing the brunette against the black sedan. “Does our wonderful night ends here?” the blonde was biting her lower lip nervously, which amused and also caused shivers to appear on Lana’s body at the same time.

“Are you implying that we-”

“Oh, what a dirty mind you have, Parrilla,” Jen reprimanded playfully, causing the brunette to roll her eyes as a smirk formed on her lips. “I just meant a…kiss.”

“Really?” Lana asked disbelievingly.

“Of course. I think we’re allowed to kiss, right? People usually kiss at the end of their dates.”

“Yes,” Lana murmured as she leaned in closer. “And we’re no different from them.” Her lips grazed the blonde’s ear teasingly, and she heard the latter sigh contentedly.

In a swift movement, Jen wrapped her arms around Lana’s waist and drew her in for a passionate kiss, which instead of becoming more heated, became slow and steady; tongues slowly tasting the other and savouring the moment that lasted long minutes.

“I’ve been waiting to do that all night long,” Jen murmured against plump lips.

“You’re such a gentlewoman for waiting so long,” Lana teased, receiving a light pinch of Jen’s fingers on the skin of her waist. “Ouch,” she complained and then laughed. “The night doesn't have to end here if you don’t want to.”

Jennifer blushed and glanced away from the brunette for a few seconds. “Well, I’d be lying if I said I wanted to kiss you goodbye right here and go home alone.”

“Is that so?” Lana teased while she circled her arms around the blonde’s neck. “What do you _honestly_ wanna do tonight?”

Jen let out a nervous chuckle as the blush on her face turned a darker shade of pink. “I just… this kiss left much more to be desired and it would be nice if we just went over to my place to have another glass of wine.”

“You want to drink more?” the blonde shrugged while she chewed on her bottom lip. “Do you wanna end up like we did the night we drank those tequila shots?”

Jen’s eyes flared with lust at the mention of that _tequila night_ and that caused goosebumps to appear on Lana’s skin as well as heat to pool between her legs.

“That night was unforgettable.”

“Indeed it was.” Lana leaned in to press a quick kiss onto thin lips. “I’d like to go to your place, anyway.” 

“Are you…sure?”

“Without a doubt. I miss you.”

“I miss you too, and I’m glad you agreed to go. Shall we?” Lana nodded and they both entered their respective cars to drive off over to Jen’s house.

* * *

 

&

“Wow, your house is beautiful!” Lana commented after passing through the door of Jen’s house. “You have awesome decorations.”

The blonde smiled gratefully at her and said, “Thanks.”

“Where is your bedroom?” Lana purred in her ear, and then laughed out loud at the face Jennifer made. “I’m just kidding, calm down,” she apologized falsely, lifting both hands in front of her chest.

“You are a huge tease, Lana.”

“Thanks, but my excuse is that I miss you so much.”

“Yeah, I know.”

Jennifer leaned in and Lana tasted the other woman’s warm breath upon her parted lips. If they kissed now, right here, it would be surely hard to stop later, so that’s why she was waiting for the blonde to take the initiative. She wanted Jen so much right now, even if they had agreed on going ‘slow and romantic’. Living this whole time without her had been hard enough, and now that they were finally back together, Lana could barely contain her excitement to be intimate with the blonde again.

Luckily she didn't have to wait any more time because Jen crashed their lips together, and pulled Lana’s body against hers deliciously. Oh, how she missed this, _them_. 

Lana felt Jen’s tongue brushing across her bottom lip, and she felt an unbearable heat burn between her thighs before they hurried down toward the couch, the brunette straddling Jen’s lap in the process. 

How long they continued taking turns in ravaging one another's lips, she couldn't say. Jen’s tongue was always moving, exploring her with the same fevered pace, as if she was memorizing... _claiming_ her, or just making it up for lost time. Lana wouldn't complain, though. She was more than happy to be in the arms — or on the lap — of this woman.

Jen drew her lips to Lana’s throat, kissing, nipping, and licking her way along the soft skin. Suddenly she remembered the time they were making out at her trailer and the blonde marked her skin, which made Lana upset because Fred couldn't discover about them. Now she realized how much telling Jen to stop could have made her feel. Today, they were together and this time _freely_ , so Lana smiled brightly even though Jen couldn't see her while she grasped blonde locks and encouraged her to continue.

“Mark me as much as you want. I’m all yours, Jennifer.” She turned her head to expose more of her neck, which resulted in a moan coming from pink lips. Her eyes closed as Jen started sucking on her pulse point. Her throat was incredibly sensitive, so she squirmed a bit on Jen’s lap as the blonde laved her attention on her skin. There was a sharp teeth bite mixed with the soothing of a wet tongue before her lips were captured once more and immediately caressed by that delicious tongue.

Lana let out a hiss and an unsatisfied moan when Jen pulled away from the kiss, breathing laboured as she stared into chocolate eyes.

“Shit, this is getting too heated.”

“I know.”

“So…”

“We’re just making out,” Lana said simply.

“And it’s getting pretty _heated_.”

“At least we still have our clothes on,” she joked.

“God knows for how long.” Jen chuckled and pressed a few long-lasting pecks on plump, smudged lips.

“Well, it’s almost midnight,” the brunette said, glancing quickly at her wristwatch. “I should go home, then,” Lana said as she started getting off of Jen’s lap.

“No, wait.” The blonde held her softly by the waist. “You’re not too drunk to head back home now?”

“We haven't drunk ever since we left the restaurant, darling.”

“Oh, that’s right. I…I guess I’m just making up excuses for you to stay the night.”

“You want me to stay the night?”

“Yeah, I mean, not for sex because this is only our first date.” Jen winked at Lana, who chuckled throatily, her heart pounding in her chest with so much love for this woman. “I just want to lay in bed with you, cuddle you with no chains pulling us down or… pulling you away from me.”

Lana grinned and then embraced her tightly. “That’s a great idea, Jen. I’ll stay the night.”

“Great, so let’s… let’s leave this couch, otherwise… you know.”

“Oh, and the bed is going to make a difference on that?” Lana teased playfully.

“The bed is for sleeping and cuddling only, Lana.” She got off of Jen’s lap completely this time and they started walking toward the blonde’s bedroom.

“I’m trusting you on that, my darling.”

Jen turned to look at her with the brightest smile she had ever seen. “I love when you call me that.”

“What? ‘My darling’?”

“Yes.”

“Good, because I love calling you that. And I love you.”

The blonde pulled her in for a quick kiss and said, “I love you too.”

After that, they quickly got ready for bed. Jen gave her a new toothbrush and some pyjamas to wear. Soon they were under the covers, clinging to each other’s body as they tried to fit two heads in one pillow.

“This feels so good,” the blonde commented with a lazy smile on her face.

“I know. It feels amazing to be with you.” Lana murmured as she moved her head toward the other woman’s chest, closed her eyes and listened to the soothing, repetitive thump of Jen’s heart. 

The blonde started drawing lazy patterns on the skin of her back, under her pyjama top, bringing shivers to her whole body.

“You know, sometimes this feels a bit scary,” Lana murmured thoughtfully.

“Scary? How so?”

“The way we feel for each other. I’ve never felt this way with anyone else. What I feel for you is too strong and sometimes... sometimes it feels like my chest is going to explode with so many feelings for you.” Lana heard Jen’s heartbeat increase its speed, which made her smile.

“Yes, it’s scary. But kinda feels less scary when we both feel the same way.”

Lana lifted her head to stare into emerald eyes. “It took us a while to get to where we are today, but I’m glad we finally did. I’m glad we feel this way.”

“I am glad too. We’re lucky.”

“Yes, we are.” She flashed a genuine smile at the blonde, who returned it instantly, and then pressed a long-lasting kiss on those beautiful lips that she would like to kiss every day for the rest of her life.

With the sound of Jennifer’s beating heart, Lana fell asleep and dreamt of sun-lit forests, garden flowers, a rainbow in the sky and a gorgeous blonde running happily toward her, who she couldn't possibly be more in love with.

* * *

 

&

**Two Months Later**

The beach was very windy that her dress kept ungluing itself from her body. She laughed out loud when Lola and Ava started jumping on their paws and dirtying Jennifer’s bare legs. 

“Oh, girls!” the blonde complained. “Babe, throw me the stick!”

Lana did so amid laughs and watched as Jen threw the stick away right when she had gotten it for Lana, and their dogs ran toward the piece of wood.

“You stop laughing or I’ll make them jump on you too!” Jen threatened playfully as she approached the brunette.

“Oh, my poor, dirty darling,” Lana cooed teasingly, bringing the blonde closer and kissing off the pout on her lips.

Jen laughed and then intertwined their fingers as they started walking slowly toward their excited dogs who were playing with the stick. 

“So, I’ve been thinking about something,” Jen started, causing the brunette to look at her.

“What is it?”

“Do you think the world is ready to know that we’re together?”

“To be honest, I don’t know. One thing I know for sure is that our fans would go absolutely crazy. From frenemies to lovers? The news would definitely drive them crazy,” Lana said with an amused chuckle.

“Some of them still think we don’t like each other, huh?” Jen poked her playfully on the ribs with her other hand and then leaned in to place a chaste kiss onto Lana’s cheeks.

“Well, there hasn't been any online interaction between us for a long time.”

“I know.”

“I think we should start posting a few clues of what’s coming soon.” The brunette winked suggestively at the blonde, who smirked in response.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Imagine the theories they would create with every little thing we post on purpose.”

“You think our fans have any idea of what’s happening between us?”

“Probably not, but I believe there are some Morrilla fans out there who could think so.”

“ _Morrilla_? Is that-”

“Yes, it is.” Lana chuckled amusedly at Jen’s surprised face. “You didn’t know they had a ship name for us?”

“I swear I didn’t know that.”

“Well, my darling, there is a ship name for us. And they would surely freak the hell out, I’m telling you.”

“Yes. And lots of people would be surprised about it, I guess.”

“I know.” Lana tugged Jen’s hand intertwined with hers close to her lips and kissed her knuckles. “When are we telling the world?”

“I don’t know. Are you ready to do that?”

“Maybe. Are you?”

“I am if you are.”

They laughed at each other and stopped on the way to encase themselves in an embrace, not caring if there was anyone at that beach that could see them like this.

Lana grinned at her beautiful girlfriend and leaned in for a slow kiss, which prolonged for a little while. They were interrupted by their barking dogs that came running toward them excitedly, splashing a bit of water and sand at them. They laughed whole-heartedly, happiness shining in their eyes as they looked at each other with huge, bright smiles that could lighten up the whole world.

“I love you, Jen,” Lana said calmly as she tucked a strand of blonde hair behind Jen’s ear.

“I love you too, Lana. Very, very much.”

* * *

_Tell the world about the love we’re making_

_I'm living for that day, someday_

* * *

 

_THE END OF A PAST_

_THE BEGINNING OF A SECOND CHANCE_

_A FRESH START_

 

> _A fresh start is the weirdest thing, as if everything that happened to this point in time, was a prequel to what comes next. It feels as if that book closed and a new one opened, appearing one word after the other, yet slowly, as if they have a calmness the first volume never possessed. And they come as a natural music, as drops of rain upon a spreading leaf, chaotic and rhythmic all at once. And as these words form, in deepest blue dancing over a white page, they are as dance steps, deliberate and intuitive, yet also guided by the ever present music. And this is the way of everything, the chaos, the synchrony, the guidance... and everything with a sprinkle of destiny. […]_ _  
>  _ _Angela Abraham_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT'S FINALLY DONE, and I'm really glad you've been a part of this with me. Thank you so much for reading, leaving reviews and kudos. Thanks for the people that have given me inspiration and ideas to write the finale, and thank you for everything, really.  
> I'd be very happy if you wrote your last review on this last chapter. I'd love to know what you think of the ending!  
> Thank you all, and KEEP ON SHIPPING MORRILLA! [insert flower bouquet emoji]


End file.
